A Rough Kind of Magic

by Louise James

  “I always fancied this place whenever Gran and I walked by. It looked as if it were waiting for someone to love it. It looked so sad and neglected. I would be loving to come to help when you are doing it up. You will need someone to advise you on curtains and carpets won’t you?”

  “I certainly will and I’ll hold you to that.” Greg put his arms around her. She turned and was in his arms. He was kissing her, running his fingers through her hair which today was only held back with a ribbon. She was returning his kisses with passion.

  “How beautiful you are.” He whispered hoarsely. She ran her fingers lightly up and down his spine. He loosened the ribbon from her hair.

  “I know it’s too soon but I believe I am falling in love with you.’

  “It’s sure I am that I might be falling myself.’ She pulled back her head. Grey eyes locked into green ones dark with passion. “You’re very handsome yourself and who’s to say it’s too soon. Aren’t you after believing in love at first sight?’

  “I do now.’ He gathered her close, her breath soft on his neck, his lips kissing her eyes, ears, lips again and again, exploring with hands that trembled. Opening the tiny buttons of her silk shirt, his fingers slid into the lacy bra finding flesh soft and warm. She moaned as he gently rubbed his thumb over her hardening nipple. She felt him harden as he moved against her. He lowered his head taking her nipples gently between his teeth. She gasped clutching his thick curling hair. He straightened to find her lips again then with a groan lowered her to the rug. There was nothing now but their mounting passion, clothing discarded as flesh demanded flesh and exploring fingers. She gasped as he entered her. Greg was normally a gentle lover but his need for this girl drove him to demand and take with a deeper power that he had ever felt before. She rose to him, thrust for thrust until with a wild cry she came and he claimed her with shuddering gasps; sated they lay in each other’s arms time forgotten; the magic complete.

  Greg came to with a jolt of pain. He gasped, caught by its severity. Olwen lay half asleep wrapped in her shawl of hair. She smiled at him not understanding. He kissed her running his hand over her thigh and hips. He moved very slowly, pain thudding through his chest and arms. He reached for his jeans and the capsule that would bring relief.

  “What are you doing?” Olwen yawned and sat up winding her arms around his chest.

  “’Just a touch of cramp.’ He lay back the pain ebbing away into a dull ache leaving him tired and drained. He drew her close pulling their clothes around them waiting for the pain to subside. Olwen laid her head on his chest, curled up in her hair like a cat; it flowed over them both a warm living cloak. Greg tried to keep perfectly still, cursing himself for several kinds of fool even though he was filled with love, tenderness and a deep sense of peace. They both woke an hour later feeling chilly. Holding each other tenderly they twined fingers, traced eyebrows and lips as lovers do.

  “The only thing keeping us warm is your hair, Rapunzel.’ Greg spread it over them loving the riot of red and gold waves. “Don’t ever have it cut will you?”

  “Well! I have not for the last twenty year or so. I don’t suppose I shall now.” She replied.

  “You don’t look old enough to have been growing it for twenty years.” Greg had recovered now thanking his lucky stars that Olwen suspected nothing.

  ‘Rubbish; I’m thirty two if you must know.’ She laughed.

  ‘Honestly? I would have said about twenty five.’

  ‘Flatterer; now tell me how old you are or have I got a toy boy?’

  ‘As old as my tongue and a bit older than my teeth.’ Greg quipped reaching for his clothes. “Come on love, it’s getting cold.’

  ‘Let me be warming you up then.’ She reached for him caressing his hair and back. Greg worried about making love again with such passion so he teased, kissed and tickled her instead until she begged for mercy.

  ‘Right; kettle on woman, your job, mine fire.’

  Olwen looked at him puzzled, for a young man so early in love to turn down a chance to make love again seemed unusual especially as she was almost sure that he hadn’t had a relationship in a while but she dressed swiftly and went to put the kettle on as requested. They ate tea as children might, cutting bits of bread and cake, feeding each other with much laughter and little kisses. She was a born mimic, by exaggerating her accent, she enacted little stories so between kisses, tea and laughter they spent precious time getting to know one another. Tea would have turned into supper, they enjoyed each other so much but a car turning in the gate brought them swiftly back to earth.

  “My God it’s Ray. I clean forgot he was coming.” Greg leapt to his feet.

  “Your friend I saw at the dance hall?” Olwen smiled. “He looked a good fun person.”

  “He’s the greatest friend one could have. We have been mates for years.” Greg pulled on his shoes. Rocky was barking a welcome as Greg opened the door. Ray was slowly climbing out of the Jaguar. It gave Greg a strange feeling to see his car again. He was surprised at Ray bringing it onto the yard except the yard was very dry. Ray parked neatly by the jeep.

  “Hi” called Greg. “Good to see you. Kettle’s on the boil or a beer if you prefer. There is someone I want you to meet.” Ray lifted his bag out of the car making no answer except to lift a hand in greeting. Olwen still barefoot came to the door and leant on Greg’s shoulder. Ray straightened his shoulders as if a mighty weight sat upon them.

  “Hello both.” His smile was strained. Greg was shocked at his appearance as he came forward. Gone was the happy go lucky lad with the sparkling eyes and merry smile, an older man stepped forward a man with a deep sorrow. In the glance Ray gave Greg before putting down his bag and greeting Olwen, Greg saw that Ray knew the truth.

  Chapter 23

  “Why? Greg, why in God’s name didn’t you tell me? Am I your best mate or what?” Did you think that I wouldn’t find out until they carted you off to hospital or out in a wooden box? Did you expect me to wait until the worst happened and you wouldn’t be able to see me running around like a chicken with its head cut off?” Ray stood head on arm against the wall.

  “Ray, I– Greg tried to stop the savage flow of words pouring from his friend. Ray shrugged off the hand he’d placed on his shoulder and straightened up.

  “Oh! I can guess what you were thinking. Good old Ray, alright to fool about with the girls or some bloody old car but of course he wouldn’t be expected to handle the fact that his best friend has a terminal illness.”

  “I was going to tell you as soon as I could find the right time.’

  “Were you? By God, how good of you. Christ! Greg you are a bastard. Can’t you begin to see how I feel? I was here with you all those weeks. I don’t bloody believe it. There was I whistling away, going back to Dave’s after work to pick up that effing loom for you and I walk straight into Tom Gregson and what does he say? Ray I am so sorry about Greg and it must be hard on you being such great mates. How are you coping Ray? How is he Ray? Me? I’m stood there like an imbecile. Christ Almighty! Fuck you Greg.’

  “I am sorry Ray. I just couldn’t tell you. I knew it would hurt you and it would have made it more real. You were always so full of fun––-”

  “Fun be damned.” Ray spun around his blue eyes blazing. “You bloody idiot. Is that what it is? You don’t deserve sympathy. “I know you but hell and damnation to be with you half the summer and not to know, wondering why you let me do most of the graft and looked such a damned awful colour half of the time. How do you think that makes me feel? I’ll tell you. Great, fucking great, that’s what.” He swung back staring out of the darkening window. “You just can’t be sorry enough Greg. Your parents and that poor girl I feel sorry for. Poor cow, screw her first tell her after, that’s about right.’

  Greg half rose, fists clenched though he was aware that Ray’s justifiable anger masked a terrible grief. He spoke quietly.

>   “My parents have known since Spring and it almost killed them and me. No, Olwen doesn’t know yet.’

  “Doesn’t she, by God?” Ray swung round and leant across the table. “When are you going to tell her then. I can see what’s between you two without counting the time you spent at the jeep saying goodnight. If I hadn’t come she would have stayed the night. Well that’s fine, that’s your business good luck to you. I would be the first to say good luck to you both but she doesn’t know Greg; She doesn’t bloody know and she is going to get hurt one way or another if you don’t snuff it one night on top of her.”

  He crashed his fist down on the table smashing dishes and overturning the milk.

  “Don’t you damn well care at all about anyone.” His shoulders shook and tears splashed on to the table and his clenched fists.

  “Greg jumped to his feet. “Of course I care. It’s because I care I haven’t told you, idiot. Can’t you see the only ray of sunshine in my life since I was told has been you; your wit, your escapades, your fun loving personality; Thoughts of you have brought a smile, kept me sane. You weren’t there when I smashed up my flat and thought about suicide rather than a slower death. I have suffered and learned to cope by myself. I spend a lot of time alone. I couldn’t put that burden on you, not yet. I knew that once you knew, the light would go out for both of us and selfishly I didn’t want that to happen. I looked to you for normality. I kept thinking I will tell him tomorrow, the next day or next week and you were enjoying your time here so much and I was too. You made me forget most of the time you know what your friendship means to me. It was very hard, Ray.’ He stretched out a hand to his friend.

  “I know.” Ray slowly took his outstretched hand and gripped it tightly before pulling him into a bear hug. After a while moving apart he wiped his eyes.

  “It was hard admitting to Tom that I didn’t know. It shook him a bit too.’

  “I never gave him a thought. He seldom goes over to your neck of the woods I didn’t think he knew you anyway.’

  Ray wiped his face in the tea towel. “He does come very occasionally. Dave knows him and would have told him we were friends. Don’t forget he would have heard you speak of me anyway. Dave is pretty cut up about it too; says if there is anything he can do for you just let him know.’

  “I thought he was a bit abrupt on the phone earlier.’ Greg frowned. ‘I seem to be upsetting everyone. I can only say I’m sorry mate. I just haven’t been able to think straight.’

  ‘I’ll say.’ Ray had calmed now and flung himself into a chair near the fire. “Come on Greg; I want to know what’s going on. Why isn’t there a cure and when are they going to find a donor? What are you doing living out here when you should be resting? What gives with Olwen and when are you going to tell her? You’ll have to tell her fast or she might fall in love with you.’

  “I’m afraid it’s too late for that.’ Greg murmured dropping his head in his hands. “I know that I love her. It’s happened so fast. “I told myself not to but when I am with her everything flies out of my head except how much I need her, until something awful recalls it, like making love to her and almost having an attack bad enough to finish me and managing to keep it from her. Oh God! Ray. What am I going to do? I can’t bear it and I have to. I have to tell her, see pity in her eyes then send her away. Suppose she won’t go, wants to stay and nurse me.” He told him about Stephanie’s visit. “Right mess I’ve made of everything already instead of putting my affairs in order, I bloody louse them up leaving heartbreak for everyone else. Why has it all happened Ray? Why?’

  “I can’t answer that. There must be something positive. Most likely you are going to get well and this is only an interlude to teach us some lessons.’

  Greg stood up shakily putting a hand on Ray’s shoulder. “Make us some tea while I feed Rocky and the chickens then I will tell you all. How do you like my dog then?’

  “When you told me how you found him I wanted to kill the bastard that done it. You haven’t found out yet? What did you say about chickens?” Ray stopped half way to the kitchen.

  “Olwen’s grandmother sent them more or less insisted I had them”

  “You’ll make a farmer yet but tell me do you feel comfortable making it with a witch’s granddaughter.” Ray grinned then turned abruptly away.

  They sat until the early hours in spite of the long day Greg had spent on the Sugarloaf. He felt such relief that Ray was here and knew the score that time slipped away with a few beers and the chance to really talk. He explained his illness, able to talk at last about his thoughts and fears. How he felt about the operation, about dying. Ray listened looking into the fire. Greg had never before felt the strength Ray concealed beneath his fun loving nature. He proved a quiet listener but quickly grasped all that Greg was telling him and Greg felt his heart lifting. Ray could share and understand feelings that Greg’s parents hadn’t been able to for the emotions they could not control. After a long silence Ray spoke.

  “Sorry I shot my mouth of earlier.”

  “I would have done the same, it was stupidity on my part to try and hide things, you always get found out. I must talk to Olwen. You are right I can’t let it get any deeper with her. God knows its deep enough with me already. All those years with Steph, now I find a girl I can love with all my heart and its barren no future at all. If only I had a few more years to make something of my life.’

  “How long is the best Greg? Honestly.’

  “They don’t really know but not more than two McLoughlin thought but he also said that you can never tell, maybe more maybe less. The medication helps; I go days without pain and feel very normal. Other days I just can’t do anything much, the pain just grabs me. Since I have been here on the whole I feel much better, haven’t had time to think about things too much.’

  “Shouldn’t you be home Greg, not on your own? Your mum would love to look after you.’

  “I know but I don’t want that. I want to feel that I am doing something on my own before I die. I don’t want to be nursed, treated like an invalid before I need to be. At least here I can pretend to be well although I don’t know what to do with the place or how to make a living.”

  “I could stay with you.” Ray spoke quietly. “I’ve fallen for this place. If it was a proper farm and could support us I’d pack in the garage.’

  “I think you have been phoning Megan in Graigwen. How is it going?’

  Ray was slow in answering. After a long pause he said. “You knew she came up to Hull after I left here didn’t you? Well she came again last week and here’s something that you never thought you’d hear. Megan is different to all the others. She is sweet and clean in a way I can’t explain, no side, no sophistication but so pretty and handles herself well even in the posh nightclubs and restaurants that I took her to. Says what she thinks rather like your Olwen; perhaps mountain girls are different. She is such a worker too. She came out on the boat last weekend, she didn’t know anything about it but somehow made herself useful and was picking it all up like mad. Things got done without asking or telling. All the others would be cooking and cleaning or not as the case maybe bu always with one eye on me’ look what I can do’ sort of thing. Megan just got on with whatever had to be done as if it didn’t enter her head that I might be noticing or not simply it was there to do and it was done. I just can’t explain.’

  “I know what you mean, it just feels right.’

  “That’s right it does. I want to see her for herself not because she is good in bed or fun to be with(she is both as it happens) but I respect her too. It’s becoming important how she feels, how she is and I know without a doubt that she loves me already. I never felt that anyone really wanted me for myself before and my parents loved her on sight. That’s another reason that I want you to tell Olwen, if she feels about you half of what I’m feeling for Megan, she is going to be just about killed.’

  “
I know, I know.’ Greg stood up. ‘Come on, let’s get some sleep. Thanks Ray for making me face a few facts. You are a good mate to me in more ways than one. Wish you were living here, it gets lonely sometimes and now you know everything it’s a relief to have someone to talk to.”

  “Find me a job and I’ll come. Don’t worry about the money side of it, as long as it feeds me and runs the car.’

  “Come off it, Megan lives down the village.’ Greg laughed. “I’m no fool; someone will be looking for a house here soon.’

  “Well! She has talked about coming to work in Hull. We’ll see but remember Greg, if you need me I’ll come straight away.”

  Greg lost for words clapped him on his shoulder.

  Chapter 24

  Fitting the new loom in the Land Rover was a day of pleasure for them both. They were in their element, troubles set aside, and they almost forgot to eat. Ray was staying until Wednesday but was spending Tuesday with Megan. They spent all of Monday fitting the loom and sorting out the electrics. Ray had found a set of original headlamps at a scrap yard in Hull, fitted them and had them working. Olwen phoned to say she would be down the following weekend. Greg promised to ring later in the week but there was no way he was going to say anything over the phone although after his talk with Ray; he was determined it must end. The sick feeling of desolation at the very thought of it he firmly conquered and gave a loving message over the phone. One more week he thought.