by Sharon Ihle
“As far as I know. When I was younger I tried to nurture that ability, but found the actual application a little too frightening for others to accept. People thought I was a witch, so I let that part of my talent fade.”
Guessing at the direction in which Rayna was heading, Mollie stuck her thumbnail in her mouth and began to chew on it. “What a shame to lose such a rare and special gift.”
“Yes, I suppose in some ways that’s true. However, that is no concern of mine right now.” Rayna’s smile was more perceptive than friendly as she elaborated. “I said my abilities had faded, not died. I know Gant is gone, and I know that he isn’t simply taking a short trip around the town. Understand what I’m saying, Mollie? I know he’s not planning to come back, but what I don’t know is why. Won’t you please tell me?”
“I’m not going to try and fool you, in fact, now I see that I really can’t. Never was much of a liar, anyways.” Mollie twisted her hands in her lap. “Yes, I do know what happened to Gant, but I’m not at liberty to tell anyone, especially not you.”
“Did he make you promise that you wouldn’t tell me, is that it?”
Mollie nodded, and then brought her thumb back to her mouth to tear off another sliver of fingernail.
Rayna contemplated this new hurdle for only a moment before she laughed and said, “There’s an old proverb that might help you see things my way. Maybe you’ve heard it—promises and piecrusts are made to be broken. I suspect our secretive Mister Gantry has used that one a time or two himself.”
As Mollie laughed, Rayna sobered her expression and then lowered her voice to a soft plea. “I love Gant and I have to know what happened to him. Please, as a woman who knows what it is to love her man, tell me.”
Avoiding Rayna’s gaze, Mollie studied what was left of her thumbnail. Then she quietly said, “I just can’t.”
Rayna leapt to her feet, intending to draw a more dramatic parallel between her love for Gant and Mollie’s for Gus, but before she could speak, a wave of nausea slammed into her belly and spots of dark and light exploded in her brain. She reached out, groping for something to save herself from falling, but she spiraled down into oblivion instead.
When her eyes fluttered opened an instant later, the first thing Rayna saw was Mollie’s face rising above her like a great harvest moon.
“Can you sit up?” the woman in the moon asked.
The question, the voice, all seemed disjoined, far off in a cave. Rayna sucked in a fresh breath, and then struggled to a sitting position. Her head was swirling, her stomach roiling as she asked, “What happened?”
After sliding her hand across Rayna’s forehead and finding it cool to the touch, Mollie said, “You got into a swoon and fainted again. How often does that happen to you of late?”
Rayna shook her head, trying to clear it. “I don’t know. Maybe two or three times, I guess. I don’t know for sure.”
“Does Gant?”
Rayna blinked several times, trying to bring the odd question and Mollie’s features into focus. Her vision cleared, but not her mind. “Does Gant what?”
“Know,” she stated bluntly. “About the baby.”
“What baby?”
“You’re carrying Gant’s child, aren’t you?”
If not for the touchy subject matter, Rayna might have laughed. Instead she stiffened her spine and muttered, “I can’t have a baby. I’m barren.”
Mollie surprised her with a laugh. “Says who? Some high-faluting New York doctor?”
Suddenly weary, too weary to explain the curse, she simply said, “Not a doctor. My mother. She knew and so do I.”
Stunning her, Mollie laughed again. “Well I know, too, and since I’m the mother of five babies, I ought to know best. Think of me as a seer when it comes to this sort of thing.”
Rayna’s mouth dropped opened. “But it’s not possible.”
“We’ll see. Let Doc Mollie do a little examination. When’s the last time you had your monthlies?”
Rayna shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s been a while, but that’s not so unusual for me.”
“Not since you joined the circus?” Mollie gave her a knowing grin. “Or should I say, not since you met up with Gant?”
Despite the subject and the unexpected detour from her quest to find the man she loved, Rayna found herself smiling. “No, not since I met up with Gant, but really, Mollie, it doesn’t mean a thing.”
“Of course it doesn’t.” Still smiling, Mollie brushed her fingers across the top of her own breasts. “How are you feeling here?”
Rayna sighed. “This is ridiculous. You’re just trying to keep me from finding out about Gant.”
“I’m not done with my examination. Humor me.”
Rayna rolled her eyes. “Oh, all right. I’m touchy there, if you must know.”
She automatically thought of last night and of Gant’s hands, of his mouth, and the tiny nibbling kisses he’d tried to bestow on her breasts then, and of how abruptly she’d pushed him away. Less sure of her own denials now, Rayna felt a little drop of bewilderment trickle down her spine.
“Why is that important?”
Mollie didn’t answer right away. Her gaze was pinned to Rayna’s waist and her slightly protruding belly. Then she looked up and bluntly asked, “It is Gant, isn’t it?”
“Gant what?”
“I don’t mean to be indelicate, but you do seem to be showing kinda early. You didn’t have a special fellah just before joining up with us, did you?”
Understanding where she was going now, Rayna quickly said, “No, absolutely not.”
Following this denial, Rayna couldn’t help but glance down into her own lap. Could a baby be the cause of her suddenly too-tight skirts and that bloated-time-to-lay-off-of-the-bread-and-grits feeling? Could she actually be carrying Gant’s child? If you believe, suddenly popped into her mind. Where had she heard those words before? The mind is a powerful thing. Gant had said those things, she realized, and Gant had proclaimed that if a man or woman believed a thing hard enough, it could become true.
Dizzy again, her mind swirling and tummy nauseous, Rayna gripped the edges of the footstool for balance. It occurred to her that something had indeed been amiss with her body for these past few weeks, something she hadn’t been able to put her finger on. But a baby? Was it possible that the miracle of life had been growing within her all this time?
Gant’s voice rang in Rayna’s ears again, proclaiming, “I don’t happen to believe in curses. I believe in you. I believe in us.”
A sob, not of anguish, but of joy filled Rayna’s throat as she thought back to their first time together, the night she’d lured Gant into the secluded dressing room. She’d done the believing then. She’d been swept up in the moment, unwilling to deny herself that which so many others took for granted. She’d let herself believe in a forbidden fantasy for those few short hours. She’d believed in love.
Her eyes filling, and then running over with tears, Rayna shot an astonished glance at Mollie, and said, “Gant was right all along. He was right.”
“Then he does know about the baby?”
“No. He was right about curses and I was wrong. Maria was wrong.”
Now it was Mollie who rolled her eyes. “I don’t know exactly what you’re talking about or what happened between you, your mama, and Gant, but I do know that you’re the only thing in the world that mattered to that little lady. Whatever she did, she did because she loved you. You’ll have to believe me on that because I’m a mother and I know what I’m talking about.”
“I know, Mollie, and thanks for reminding me.”
“You’ll know soon enough what I mean, even if it all doesn’t make sense to you right now.” Mollie lightly poked Rayna’s tummy just beneath her waist. “In fact, judging by the size of you, you might even know what it is to be double-blessed.”
Rayna glanced down at her tummy. “You think I might be having twins?”
“That or one huge baby. You’re mighty
big for so early in the game.”
Rayna wrapped her arms around her stomach and hugged herself. Never, ever in her wildest dreams did she imagine that she would someday become a mother. A mother, no less, to the child or children of the man she loved. At the very thought, her never-ending supply of tears erupted again, spewing forth in a torrent.
“Having twins might not be so bad,” Mollie encouraged, patting Rayna’s knee.
“It’s not that,” she said between sobs. “I’m happy about the baby whether it’s one or two.”
“Your mother then? Maybe I shouldn’t have mentioned her so soon after losing her.”
Regaining control of herself, Rayna shook her head. “I’m not upset about my mother either. I’ve always known how much Maria loved me, and I always loved and trusted her back. My mistake was in believing the things she believed in, but it was my mistake, not hers.”
“Well, crying at the drop of a hat is part of what happens when a woman’s in a family way. It ought to ease up some a few weeks down the road.” Mollie leaned back in her chair. “As for you and your mother, I won’t pretend that I know what you’re talking about, and I’m sure it’s none of my business anyway, so why don’t we just leave it at that. What I’m concerned about now is Gant running off with you in a family way. I’m not so sure my promise still holds good.”
“Gant?” Rayna sat up with a start. “My God, I almost forgot about him in all the excitement. You have no choice but to tell me where he went now. After all, he’s got to make an honest woman of me.”
“That he does, even if Gus has to drag out his shotgun.” Mollie laughed, but the smile and her tone were bittersweet. She turned serious, almost somber as she added, “I didn’t mean to get your hopes up when I said I might have to break my promise to Gant. It’s just that I think he has a right to know about the baby. As for you thinking that you might join up with him, I’m afraid that’s not going to happen.”
“But why not? I don’t understand.”
“Gant doesn’t want to drag you into his troubles. I’m just sure that he wouldn’t dream of visiting that kind of trouble on his child either.”
“Troubles? You’ve got to tell me what’s going on.”
“I expect that I do.” Mollie paused, thinking over how much she ought to say, and then made up her mind. “He’s not going to like this, but I think I’d best tell you everything.”
And then she did, starting with Gant’s tense visit with his father, the death of Junior, and the arrests of J.R. and Lou. Throughout it all, Rayna kept her silence, hands balled in her lap.
“So you see?” Mollie said, finishing with Gant’s plans to spring his brothers from jail. “He really has no other choice. If all goes well with the jailbreak, he and Lou will head for California and J.R. will come back here. Maybe some day when things cool down, Gant can send for you and the babe, but for now, we’ve just got to let him go.”
As she considered the enormous job before him and what it would cost Gant, Rayna’s tears erupted again, falling harder than before. Through them she said, “You did say this crying business is part of having a baby, didn’t you?”
Her own eyes veiled with tears, Mollie nodded. “I bawled like a new-born calf every time the sun come up just for the sheer surprise that it was there again.”
Feeling a little less foolish, Rayna stood up, more slowly this time. Her legs feeling sturdy beneath her, she began to pace.
“There has to be something I can do to help,” she muttered more to herself than Mollie. “Some way I can draw the attention away from Gant, and still make sure that he gets his brothers out of jail. There must be a way to rescue them without involving Gant. There has to be.”
“Oh, I don’t think Gant would be too happy if he could hear you talking like that.”
“But he’s not here to hear me, is he?” Rayna arched a slender ebony eyebrow. “Did Gant tell you what his plan was or when he figures on going to the jail?”
Mollie pressed her palms together and mouthed a silent prayer. Then she divulged Gant’s strategy. “He’s somewhere in town now getting horses and supplies. He said he was going to lay low in one of the saloons after he was prepared, and then head on over to the jail sometime after dark.”
Rayna resumed pacing. “Near as I can figure, if I were to stop by just before dark, I’d have plenty of time to break them out myself and no one would ever see Gant.”
Mollie jumped to her feet. “You can’t do that, not in your condition. Gant would string the both of us if you even tried.”
“That’s a risk I’ll have to take. You know as well as I do that if he steps one foot in that jailhouse, he’ll be on the run for the rest of his life. Me? Nobody knows who I am. If I leave the area afterwards, hideout on the steamship, maybe no one ever will know. The risk is far less for me than it is for Gant.”
Mollie had been pacing right along with Rayna. She came to a halt next to her desk, laid her palms flat against the top, and then drew in a deep breath. “Lawdy, Gant will want to string me up more than ever for even suggesting this, but I think I might have a solution that will keep us all out of harm’s way.”
Rayna quickly joined her, encouraging, “Go on. I’ll do anything.”
“As you might know, a few years back Gant served with me and Gus in Hood’s Texas Brigade. It seems we needed someone to sneak some quinine into the Third Arkansas soldiers, who were sick prisoners and desperately in need of medicine. I was already used to dressing up as an old lady, so I did it again, but this time Gus wrapped up some quinine in small packets and hid them in my hair. Worked like a charm.”
Rayna thought she was catching on, but had some questions. “What does quinine have to do with getting the Gantry boys out of jail, and why would you dress up as an old lady?”
“I used to do a bit of spying in the enemy camp by dressing up as an old lady selling cookies. We had the makeup from our one-wagon circus show in those days and these days we’ve got even better makeup. I figure if I dress up as an old lady and hide some packets of gunpowder instead of quinine in my hair, I could pretend I was looking for someone else like Gant did, slip his brothers the gunpowder and maybe a pistol, and then get on out of there before the fireworks start.”
Liking most of the idea, but lacking a few details, Rayna asked, “Exactly how would the boys get out of there? You said the door was locked and the cells are, too.”
“The boys can blow the lock off of their cell door with the gunpowder as soon as I’m out of there.” She frowned, seeing a flaw in her plan. “Guess they would be on their own after that, but it could work out. Let’s think on it some.”
Rayna had been doing just that. “I like the idea so far, but of course, we can’t just leave them trapped behind that door. We’ve got to think of a way to get them by the jailer.”
“Hmm,” Mollie murmured, tapping her chin. “That is a problem.”
Eyes blazing as a solution struck her, Rayna said, “I think I’ve got it. What if I go in there as Ma Gantry, not just some old lady? That would give me an identity no one could track.”
“You? Who said anything about you going to the jail? I won’t hear of it, not in your condition.”
“You’re not going,” Rayna insisted. “You’re already a mother and have a family to worry about. Besides--Gant is my man. Don’t say another word on the subject.”
One look in Rayna’s eyes was enough for Mollie. “All right. So what does Ma Gantry do after she gets inside the jail?”
“After the jailer lets me inside for one last visit with my boys, I give them the gunpowder and a gun. I haven’t got the rest worked out yet, but I’m sure it will come to me.”
“I don’t know.” Mollie frowned deeply. “It sounds awfully dangerous.”
“More dangerous than your work during the war? I’m perfect for the job. What have I been all these years but an actress? All I need is another diversion.” Thinking that way, another solution popped into Rayna’s mind. “I’ve got it.
I’ll take Sweetpea with me. He could distract a dead man.”
“Lawdy, I don’t know about this.” Mollie twisted her fingers together. “If anything happens to you, I’ll never forgive myself for even mentioning my old lady getup.”
“Why don’t you think about what will happen to me if I don’t try this?” Rayna suggested. “Do you think my life will be happy if I let the man I love ride out of it so easily? Would you let Gus go this way?”
Mollie sighed, and then whispered, “No, of course not.”
“Then understand if you can, know that I’ve spent my whole life thinking that I’d never have a normal life, never have a man to love or carry his child in my womb. Now that it’s so close, now that I know I can have Gant and our baby, too, nothing on this earth is going to keep me from having it all.”