Revelations
Page 10
Nor did the dinner party shed any light on his chances. He knew he was not the same as he had been in the company of Mr and Mrs Gardiner, but she was not helping him at all by being distant and evasive. His discomfort made him a shade too slow when finding a seat, and he was stuck next to Mrs Bennet all night. Fortunately he could easily refrain from talking, and he spent the night observing Bingley and Miss Bennet, certain now that the love did come from both sides. Miss Bennet was a lot less spirited, but she did like Bingley a lot, that much was clear, and he was as smitten as he ever had been.
And that was the most he got from that evening, well, that and a chance to say a few words to Miss Elizabeth, but she was not herself, once again.
There was no way to really talk in this company, and he soon gave up and just looked at her, admired her, prayed that she had found love for him in her heart and behaved in this confusing manner out of uncertainty and emotion.
After another few days of shooting by day and quiet evenings at home, the time had come for Darcy to go to Pemberley to fulfil his duties and to see Georgiana. It pained him to have to go away without knowing more, but at
least he would be able to right one more wrong before he went, and he did so immediately.
'Bingley, I have a confession to make and it's going to make you very angry.'
His friend's sympathetic face looked surprised and concerned, Darcy had never sounded so contrite before, this had to be bad.
'Your sister and I conspired to keep you away from Hertfordshire because we thought Miss Bennet was mercenary, because we thought Miss Bennet didn't love you.'
Bingley seemed relieved, he already knew that and accepted their more objective observations, even though they contradicted his own.
'Well, you told me that, and I was glad you warned me for I seriously thought she did love me. But I cannot seem to forget her, so I guess I'll just have to be duped then. But that was just honest advice, wasn't it?'
Darcy shook his head, and added, 'Miss Bennet was in London for three whole months, and Miss Bingley and I knew, but we kept it from you on purpose.'
That did make Bingley angry, making him look quite formidable actually, who would've thought his friend could be so menacing!
'You what?'
'There is no excuse for what we did, Bingley, we wanted to protect you from a very unwise connection but it was a despicable thing to do.'
'You are so right there is no possible excuse for what you did! Have you any idea what I've suffered over this?'
Darcy admitted, 'I have, I have seen your pain, and it gets worse. Miss Elizabeth told me that her sister did love you, that there was no reason at all to keep the two of you apart. We caused you to suffer for nothing.'
'You talked about me with Miss Elizabeth? When? And why? You hardly know her!'
This needed explaining, and Darcy told his friend everything. Bingley's anger flared up at hearing how his friend had done his best to separate him from Miss Bennet, then proposed to her sister himself, but seeing the pain in his friend's face, the same hurt he had been feeling for months now, his anger ebbed a little, replaced by sympathy for his plight.
'So how come you didn't tell me this before? If Miss Bennet does love me I could have spoken months ago!'
'I wanted to observe her first, see if she really did love you before sending
you out there, but I couldn't face her sister yet. Can you forgive me, Bingley?'
'I don't know, Darcy, you treated me like a child, I could have made the decision myself, couldn't I? Why did it have to be you who decided she loved me? Why not me? I have no trouble at all believing Miss Elizabeth.
She is very intimate with Jane, and has her best interest at heart.'
Bingley was right, Darcy had no right to interfere in his life, his friend was an adult, with the right to make his own decisions.
'I'm sorry again, Bingley, I don't know why I thought you needed protection.
You are a grown man and I will not patronize you again. I seem to be the one unable to make any decisions but bad ones. '
He looked positively beat, but Bingley had no eye for his friend anymore, he was starting to feel more and more elated: Miss Bennet, dear Jane, loved him! She would be his at last, the sweetest and most beautiful woman in the world, he really had no doubts anymore, she hadn't told him she loved him but her behaviour the last two days, and Miss Elizabeth's conviction, said it all. She had loved him all this time, and she still did. He would try to get her alone tomorrow, tell her his fondest wishes. Bingley clasped his friend's shoulder with affection, feeling magnanimous.
'I forgive you your interference Darcy, if Miss Elizabeth says her sister loves me I'm sure she does, and dear Jane and I will be the happiest couple ever. I'll write you as soon as I have good news.'
And that was that. The difficult moment was over but Darcy felt awful, his friend was no longer angry at him, on the contrary, he was so happy that he had totally forgotten Darcy's own plight. To see his friend elated when Miss Elizabeth was so grave and silent, she probably still hated him after all, maybe it was for the best he left for Pemberley tomorrow morning. There was nothing for him to gain here.
Georgie would be sympathetic to his pain.
Chapter 8
And she was, she listened to his observations on Bingley and Miss Elizabeth and asked, 'Do you agree that Miss Bennet will accept Bingley if he proposes to her?'
Darcy could not but affirm, when he left things looked really promising, and Miss Bennet was very steady, so her affections would probably be steady, too. Georgie was obviously glad to hear that.
'Don't worry about your former interference, it's not all your fault you know, he does have a certain naiveté that invites people to feel protective of him, even I have felt that at times. What you say of Miss Elizabeth still doesn't worry me, her mother did behave atrociously, and if she is still uncertain about her feelings for you, I'm not surprised at her being rather quiet. Just go back when our business here and in London is done, and be patient.'
What could he do but live his life and hope she was right? She accompanied him on his duties to his tenants, the first time she volunteered to do so, and she made a real effort to be outgoing and interested in their concerns, to the great enjoyment of herself and the tenants of his estate, who could not but find Miss Darcy a lot less proud and a lot more likeable than her reputation.
When after a few days Darcy got a letter from Bingley, announcing his engagement to Miss Bennet, he let Georgie read it and she comforted him for the pain he felt at his friend having succeeded where he was still very much in the dark. But she also congratulated him on the certainty of seeing Miss Elizabeth often from now on, with his best friend and her sister married they would be in the same house very often, and Georgie admonished him to take his time. It was so very thrilling to get advice from his little sister, she was so grown-up all of a sudden.
Then they drove to London together, a very enjoyable trip for both of them.
In London, they found and visited several talented pianists, and Georgie played for all of them. In the end, two of them were willing to teach a girl, and Georgie told Darcy she liked one of them better because he seemed to
truly see some talent in her, the other one merely needed the money. So they engaged the master in question, Mr Fielding, a young stage pianist who hadn't yet managed to reach the highest level of his art and taught one or two students each year to improve his income.
Darcy didn't worry about Georgie feeling attracted to him, he was handsome, but at the same time seemed to be the docile kind that she admitted to dislike, and Mrs Annesley would be chaperoning her anyway.
After their successful search for a master Georgie pleaded to be allowed to stay in London to start her lessons straight away, and Darcy consented and sent an express to Mrs Annesley immediately, to bid her to come to London as soon as possible by coach.
Then they had dinner together, and Darcy was again struck by the change in his sis
ter, she looked so grown-up and she had become such excellent company! They talked through dinner, then Georgie sat at her instrument to put in some extra practice. Darcy sought out his library to lose himself in a book, content to be all by himself for an evening. He had chosen a novel, he never used to read those but he felt the need to drown his anxiety in someone else's troubles. Soon he was immersed in the story, his own concerns forgotten for a few blessed hours. Until his butler knocked and entered the library, announcing, 'Lady Catherine de Bourgh to see you, sir.'
A surprise visit from his aunt? Whatever might be the reason for that?
Though Darcy was not particularly fond of his aunt, he was curious to hear what she had come for, and he put away his book and asked his butler to see her to the library, the drawing-room being rather noisy with Georgie practising.
Aunt Catherine was not happy, that much was clear, she barged in and started talking even before Darcy had the chance to greet her properly. He sat down to hear her out but she didn't follow his example, she remained standing as if to emphasise her indignity.
'Pardon my impetuousness, Darcy, but I have just been insulted in the most outrageous manner, by a young woman not worthy of the term lady, neither by her connections nor by her behaviour. I drove by Miss Elizabeth Bennet's house this afternoon, to beg her to clear up some rumours I had heard of her being engaged to marry my nephew, meaning of course, you, Darcy.'
That was the last thing Darcy expected to hear, and even though he could guess where such a rumour came from, his best friend was engaged to her sister after all, it still gave him a little thrill to hear her name mentioned in
one breath with his own. He managed to control his reaction, though his aunt would not have noticed if he hadn't, for she was already moving on to the next indignity.
'You know I have shown that young lady every possible consideration when she visited her cousin last spring, and now she thanks me by spreading rumours concerning herself and someone so much above her she should be ashamed to even think of it. Thankless girl!'
Here, Darcy felt called upon to say something in Miss Elizabeth's defence, since he knew she would never do such a thing.
'Dear aunt Catherine, please keep in mind that a coming wedding always gives rise to rumours of this kind, and with my friend Bingley engaged to her sister this rumour is most likely the result of the neighbourhood gossiping.'
Aunt Catherine contemplated that, she always had a healthy respect for Darcy's opinion.
'However true that may be, the insolence of that girl knows no bounds, for after she denied my implications fervently and without the slightest respect for my person, she refused to answer my question whether you had made her an offer of marriage, and told me in the most offensive manner possible that it was none of my business to know.'
Did that signify anything? It would have been such a triumph for Miss Elizabeth to have told aunt Catherine frankly that he had, and that she had refused it. Her Ladyship would have been mortified, and Miss Elizabeth's feelings on being thus addressed would have been vindicated.
'And when I told her you were engaged to my daughter, she suggested that would have made an offer from you to her impossible. I then proceeded to explain patiently that your engagement had been the wish of both your mother and myself from the very first, that there was no formal agreement between the two of you. She then presumed to instruct me that it was solely your choice to either honour our wish or not, not hers. She even suggested that if your choice was not for Anne, but for herself, she would not feel hindered by my wishes nor your late mother's to accept you.'
Staggered by his aunt's angry words, Darcy felt a sudden hope rise inside him. Miss Elizabeth spoke to aunt Catherine of accepting an offer of marriage from him? He needed to hear more, and since his aunt was not done by far and working herself up to even greater anger, his wish was
granted.
'I told her she would be the most ungrateful girl in the world if she were to marry you, and that she would be slighted and despised by all your connections. And you know what she said?'
Darcy was completely stunned and unable to give voice to an answer, but of course it was not needed or even expected.
'The obstinate, insolent girl replied that such a thing would be most unfortunate indeed, but, and this is literally what she said, that the wife of Mr Darcy must be so happy by being thus singled out, that she could not be expected to have any reason to repine. She actually said that, I have never been talked to in such a way!'
Oh my God. Dared he hope she said these things because she truly believed them? Did Miss Elizabeth believe that she would endure being slighted and despised to be married to him? Not that she'd care about any of his aunt's pompous connections. Wouldn't Miss Elizabeth have laughed at Lady Catherine if she hadn't cared for him, and told her that Mr Darcy could marry his cousin for all she cared, and sire a brood of bloodless, sickly runts on her? No, that was his own opinion on marrying his cousin, Miss Elizabeth would never be so rude. But she would have told his aunt frankly that she didn't care about him, if she in fact didn't care about him. Therefore, she must care about him. His mind was running in circles by now, but his aunt was still not finished.
'I worked on her honour, her compassion for you, for your respectability, but she did not bow before my superiority. In desperation, I asked her whether she was engaged to you, and fortunately after some time she admitted she wasn't. But she did not oblige me by promising she wouldn't ever enter such an engagement, and instead accused me of officious interference in your affairs, and her own. I then threw her youngest sister's elopement in her face and she became positively resentful. Will you believe she told me I had offended her? As if she wasn't the one being offensive, refusing to listen to reason and stay in her own little world.
So I came here instead to warn you that she is determined to have you, and to make you promise me not to fall for her devious plotting.'
Darcy would not have chosen aunt Catherine as his witness when he vowed not to trust his own observations to decide that Miss Elizabeth felt at least some love for him. But wasn't this the sign he had hoped for? Wouldn't Miss
Elizabeth have scorned the very suggestion of intimacy between them if she hadn't learned to care for him at least a bit?
He needed to know, and he needed to know soon. As soon as Mrs Annesley had arrived he would ride to Netherfield and he would have the truth of it, whatever Georgie might say about taking time.
A sound brought him out of his musings, to see his aunt waiting for a reaction. She had not asked him to promise anything he couldn't keep, so he would answer her frankly and truthfully.
'Thank you for your warning, aunt Catherine. I feel I can safely promise you to not be taken in by any devious lady plotting against me. I will marry only where my heart lies, and after serious consideration of the consequences of my choice.'
That was the entire truth, even if it meant marrying Miss Elizabeth as quickly as he could get her to agree. She had never plotted to get him, he was the one desperately in love with her. After considering the consequences for months he didn't care what anyone was going to think.
Anyone except Miss Elizabeth, and never since the scene at Hunsford Parsonage had he had so much hope of her.
His aunt seemed satisfied by his empty promise and returned to her carriage immediately, not even inquiring after Georgie. When he had seen it drive off, Darcy went back to the library and sat down, mind in a complete flutter.
His thoughts kept spinning, dared he hope that this was it, the fulfilment of his dreams? No, he dared not. But he would find out, and soon. Before Georgie went to bed she came to find him, and he told her about aunt Catherine's visit, but not of his intention to propose to Miss Elizabeth again as soon as possible. She'd disapprove, but he was determined to do it. She was very sweet, and said, 'See, she does love you. Now don't be disheartened if she's still quiet, just do your best to draw her out and she will do the same for you. Everything will work out fine.
Let's have some fun together until Mrs Annesley arrives, that will make time go a lot faster until you can ride to Longbourn.
And indeed it did, for when the estimable Mrs Annesley finally walked into the drawing-room, tired with travelling by public transport, it didn't seem like four days had passed. It was still early afternoon so he had his packs readied and his horse saddled, and took his leave of his sister. The last thing she said was, 'Write to me, Fitzwilliam, don't leave me in the dark, please!'
She didn't tell him to be patient, or not to rush things, she knew he would propose, and she wanted him to write her. She expected success. And with that comforting thought he soothed himself during the ride to Netherfield, where he was received with pleasure by Bingley, who had obviously forgiven him his interference in his affairs and was supremely happy with his fiancée. After Darcy had congratulated him on his engagement with genuine feeling, Bingley said, 'I have a dinner engagement tonight at the Wrights, but I suppose you must be rather tired anyway. You'll come with me to meet my fiancée tomorrow morning, won't you? She loved me all this time, and was sadly disappointed when I left. I didn't tell her anything about what Caroline and you did, I want you all to be friends, I just told her I was very occupied with business and felt too insecure of her to write. She believed me. I guess she'll blame Caroline for not telling me she was in London, but Jane is so forgiving, she won't hold it against her for long. I'm so happy, Darcy, I wish I could help you become as happy as myself.'
Having dined alone that night, Darcy retrieved from his luggage the novel he had been reading at home in London and his evening passed quickly, with only a little apprehension for the next morning.