by Barnard, Jo
Our finishing touch was the huge Christmas tree in the corner, which we tastefully decorated with traditional red and gold beads and bows, whilst singing along to our favourite carols and sampling the mulled wine that we’d be handing out to our guests. Whoever would have thought that this amount of hard work could be so much fun?
Guy, bless him, not only stuck to his promise of getting the leaflets to us by Tuesday, he turned up with them at close of business on Monday instead. Saffie had already left to pick Sol up from rugby practice and I was about to lock up.
“Oh wow! Guy, you’re a star. I really can’t thank you enough for everything you’ve done.” Without thinking, I picked up a bottle of mulled wine to give to him as a gesture, and then blushed profusely as I remembered his drink problem.
“You trying to push me off the wagon or something?” His cheeky smile put me at ease and I admired how accepting he was of his situation.
“Honestly, my brain at times. I’m sorry, Guy. Tell you what, I’m locking up now. Fancy grabbing a quick pizza if you’re not busy? My treat.”
“Well, that does sound tempting, Jude. Only I’m not sure what her indoors would think if I ate dinner with someone else.”
“Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean anything by it. I just wanted to say thanks, that’s all.”
Guy grinned again. “I’m only teasing you, Jude. Her indoors is my cat Phoebe. She expects her dinner to be served bang on six pm. But I guess I can make an exception this once and deal with her sulks later. She’s a demanding little minx you know!”
We laughed. “Seriously though, pizza would be lovely. Thank you.”
Spending time with Guy was easy. We chatted about Annie, the shop, the twelve steps and my cards, and before we knew it, the waiters were turning the lights out. I paid the bill and Guy walked me to the bus stop.
“So how’s the meditation going now, Jude? Do you feel like you’re getting your spirituality back on track again?”
“It’s definitely getting easier, but I’m still not at peace like I was in Punjab. I’m hoping to get over there again for a visit soon. I miss my lovely friends.”
“Well I know it’s not exactly on the same level as India, but I go to a really nice meditation class on a Thursday evening at a unit down on the farm. You’re welcome to come along. I think you’d really like the lady who runs it.”
“Ooh, that sounds nice. Thursdays are always pretty quiet in the shop, so I can always get away on time. It’d be nice to meditate with others again. What time?”
“It starts at seven-thirty. I could pick you up just after seven if you like? I’ve got to come past you anyway.”
The bus pulled in to the stop and I jumped on. “Sounds perfect. Thanks, Guy. I’ll look forward to that.” He waved and we headed off home.
For the next few days, Saffie and I made great progress, handing out our leaflets to customers and placing bundles of them in various local shops. We also sent the artwork to the editor of our local free magazine who promised to get it into this week’s issue.
Before I knew it, Thursday evening had arrived, and I was deliberating over what to wear to the meditation group. I plaited my hair to the side in case I’d be lying down, and settled on some leggings and a long-sleeved indigo kaftan with the ‘om’ symbol swirled on the front. I popped some woolly socks in my bag, along with a bottle of water, and threw a heavy shawl around my shoulders, hoping I’d be warm enough.
The unit was only ten minutes drive from me which meant that we arrived a little early. A rickety old door led us through to a bright airy room with a high beamed ceiling.
“Oh look, that’s Yogi Bhajan,” I said to Guy, pointing at a poster on the wall of a bearded man in a white turban.
“Yogi who?”
“Bhajan. He was a wonderful Sikh man who taught kundalini yoga and brought it over to the West. He showed people around the world how they didn’t need drugs to experience a state of higher consciousness. They could achieve it through this form of yoga. He set up drug rehab centres around the globe.”
“Oh wow! He sounds like a legend.”
“Yes. My Sikh friends in Punjab said he was not only humble, but fearlessly outspoken. A formidable teacher by all accounts.”
“A wonderful man!” came a gentle voice from the doorway.
“Jude, this is Grace, our meditation teacher. Grace, this is Jude.” Grace was dressed from head to toe in white, her braided blonde hair tied loosely back from her pretty, kind face, and her bold green and pink mandala necklace jumping out from all of the whiteness.
“Lovely to meet you, Grace. I used to go to a kundalini yoga class in Punjab. Bit far to travel now though.”
Grace smiled. “Well, if ever you’re looking for a new class, I teach one here on a Saturday morning.”
“Oh, what a shame. I work on Saturdays.”
Other students began to trickle in and take their seats – some on chairs, some on cushions and some on meditation stools. The evening was lovely and I revelled in the feeling of oneness. But although I enjoyed the peace and tranquillity of the silent session, I kept feeling frustrated that I’d been led to this beautiful lady who taught kundalini yoga and yet I couldn’t attend her class. Towards the end of the session, a thought popped into my mind. Maybe Grace could bring her teachings to the shop.
Putting all fears to the back of my mind, I hung back and approached her as she was clearing away.
“Lovely session thanks, Grace. I really enjoyed myself.”
“Oh, I’m glad, and it’s a pleasure to have you here.”
“I was just wondering if you’d be interested in getting involved with a new therapy room we’re opening in The Treasure Chest? It’s quite a small room, so I guess it wouldn’t be much use for group work, but you could do one-to-one sessions in there or use the main shop floor when we’re closed in the evenings.”
“Well that’s so funny,” Grace said smiling. “I’ve been asking the gods to guide me towards a space where I can practice my massage. I don’t suppose that could work for you could it?”
“I think that could actually work very nicely indeed. I was a bit nervous about asking you.”
“Well I’m very glad you did. How about I call into the shop and have a look at the space? If it’s viable to hold a class there and we can drum up the interest then all the better, but I’ll need you to provide a few mats and cushions if that’s ok?”
“Sounds great! I’m in there most days, so please do pop in. Oh, and if you’re interested, we’re having a Christmas shopping evening on Saturday night. Heavily reduced gift ideas and a glass of mulled wine too.”
“Well, how can I refuse? I’ll see you then, Jude. And thanks again.”
As I slipped into bed that evening, I felt a huge sense of gratitude for how things seemed to be falling into place. I thanked Pure Love for supporting me, before drifting off into the most wonderful sleep.
Chapter Twenty
It was the day before the Christmas shopping event and young Sol was helping Saffie to clear out the last of the mess in the shop, leaving me free to pop round to Annie’s to get her shopping list.
She seemed so pleased to see me, as I was her, and I went into the kitchen to make us both a cup of tea.
“Do you take sugar, Annie?”
“I like to think I’m sweet enough thanks, darling, but I will have a sweetener. Now then, I like my cup to be two thirds full and only a dash of milk.” She gave a little chuckle, knowing full well how fussy she was. I admired her ability to communicate her needs so clearly and lovingly to get what she wanted. “And there are some biscuits in that tin up there if you can reach. Help yourself to what you want.”
I popped her porcelain mug down beside her. “How are you feeling today?”
“Well, darling, I have felt better, but I must accept that this is how things are for now, and keep reminding myself that this too shall pass.” She took a big gulp of tea. “Ooh, that’s lovely. So, come on then, let’s talk about thi
s shopping list.”
I explained the kind of things we sold, and Annie told me about her friends and family and the sort of things they’d like. As she leant forward to place her mug back down on the table, she winced.
“Ooh, are you ok?”
“Oh, it’s nothing, darling. Just my feet are so dry that my socks keep catching every now and then, and I can’t bend down far enough to reach them at the moment.”
“Would you like me to rub some cream in for you?”
Annie’s eyes filled with tears. “Oh would you, darling? Oh that’s ever so kind.”
“Really, it’s nothing.” I massaged her feet and we chatted about what I’d been up to lately.
“Well, it seems as though you’ve been seeing quite a bit of my lovely Guy.” Annie winked.
“Oh, not you as well,” I laughed. “My friend Saffie keeps teasing me about that, but honestly, nothing has happened between Guy and me. He’s such a nice man and we do get on really well, but we’re just friends.”
Annie stared down at me. “You must admit though, Jude, he is rather gorgeous.” A smile crept over her face, “And you would make rather a lovely little couple.”
“Well, I don’t think he’s interested like that anyway, Annie. He certainly hasn’t made any advances. We get on really well as friends and that’s fine with me.”
“Hmmm, well I’ve known Guy for a long time now, and I can tell you that since he’s been in recovery, he’s never had a girlfriend.”
“Well maybe he likes it that way?”
“Or maybe he’s afraid of interfering with your recovery. Now I know it’s none of my business really, darling, but I do keep getting a feeling about you two; and I must say, it’s a good one.”
“Well, I’ll bear that in mind then thanks, Annie.” I patted her feet and pulled her fluffy socks back on. “Anyway, I must get going now. It’s going to be a looooong day tomorrow.”
She opened her arms for a hug. “I hope it goes really well for you, darling. You deserve it, you really do.”
As I left Annie’s bungalow, a message flashed up on my phone. It was from Deb.
‘Hi Jude. Cash buyer came through for Dad’s house. Wants to move quickly and has been pushing for a fast exchange which is due to happen on Monday. Looks like the sale will be complete by the end of next week. Please forward your account details and I’ll ask the solicitor to pay your half directly to you. Hope you got the cheque I sent you. Deb xx’
A mix of different emotions washed over me all at once; anger with Deb for what she’d done with Matt, sadness at the physical loss of Dad’s home, and relief to know that I would soon have the financial freedom to do some wonderful things that Dad would be proud of.
I sobbed and sobbed and sobbed, and not knowing what else to do, I knocked on Annie’s door. She held me tightly and stroked my hair gently as I relayed my feelings. “That’s it, darling. Let it go. You’re perfectly safe. Let it go and it will pass.”
It was as if I was she was meant to be there with me when I crumbled, and I thanked Pure Love for my angel, Annie.
By the time I got home that evening I felt much calmer. Deciding to focus my energies on the positives, rather than the negatives, I spent the next two hours booking my flight to Punjab.
Chapter Twenty-One
I awoke to find that the emotional cloud had lifted. My head felt clear, my heart felt open, and I spent plenty of time getting ready for the long day ahead. I showered in my favourite rose gel and applied lashings of orange-and-geranium body butter to my skin.
Leaving that to soak in, I took time applying my makeup and I carefully blow dried my hair into loose curls. Feeling fabulous, I put on a beautiful long-sleeved ‘kameez’ tunic that I’d bought at the bazaar with Meeta. It was jade green and gold and fitted where it touched, and I teamed it with opaque black tights, suede black ankle boots and a thick gold bangle. I popped a scarlet red lipstick into my bag for later.
Right, all ready to play hostess, I thought. I picked a card for my day ahead. ‘NEW BEGINNINGS’ was my message, which felt wholly appropriate.
As soon as I arrived at the shop, I loaded a bag up with goodies for Annie and hoped she’d be pleased with the best pick of the bargains. Scented candles, pretty photo frames, skinny scarves, beaded trinket boxes and crystal key rings made up the selection, all of which I’d have been very happy to receive.
A combination of Christmas tunes and further plans for the therapy room made the day pass by in a flash, and before we knew it, customers were arriving in their droves for our event. The atmosphere was buzzing, the till was ringing and everyone seemed to have a fun time. Raymondo and his wife Maria turned up, as did Martha and her friend Hattie. Guy showed his face in support and said how amazing I looked, and Grace came along too. She committed to offering a day per week of massage in the shop and mentioned again about the cushions and mats should there be a demand for meditation or yoga.
Feeling chuffed to bits with the success of our evening, we cashed up and began to count the monetary value of our efforts. Not only had we shifted loads of bargain stock, but quite a lot of full-priced items too.
“You might as well finish this off, Jude,” Saffie said, emptying the remainders of the mulled wine into my mug. “I’ll run you home tonight.”
Why not, I thought. I hadn’t touched a drop all night in order to keep a professional clear head. “Thanks, my lovely. Oh, Saff, I’ve got something to tell you. Well, a couple of things actually.”
“Let me guess, you’re seeing Guy?”
“Behave! Guy’s just a friend. Honestly, Saff, what are you like? No, what I wanted to tell you is that my dad’s house sale is going through and I should get my half of the money next week.”
“Oh, wow! That was quick. How do you feel about it, honey?”
“Well, last night I felt really down. It all seemed really final and sad. But once I’d let that go, I was able to focus on the freedom it would give me. You know, as if Dad’s still helping me. And one thing I promised myself was to visit Meeta and Gulab as soon as I could afford to. I left them all in such a hurry and pretty much cut them out when they’d been so good to me.”
“Right?”
“So, last night, I went ahead and booked a flight out there. I figured that if I went before Christmas, it wouldn’t impact too much on our January relaunch. Anyway, I’ve booked it for next Thursday. I’m sorry it’s short notice, but I’ll only stay a few days and I’ll fly back on the following Monday night. Is that ok?”
“Jude, you haven’t taken any time off in months. Of course it’s ok on that front. But what about the whole Matt thing? Alarm bells are ringing rather loudly in my head at the moment if I’m honest.”
“Yeah….well…I haven’t thought too much about that one. Only that I wasn’t planning to let him know I was going. I just feel I need to spend some time with the two ladies who made me feel so welcome. I owe them that, and I want to give them a hug. Plus, I thought I could spend some time in the bazaar to see what I could bring back for the shop.”
“Well, that all sounds great, but you’d better not bloody well get back with that arsehole, and you’d better come back to me!”
“Of course I’ll be back, Saff. I’m not going to let anything get in the way of our plans. The Treasure Chest and it’s Box of Delights are our future, and I want this to work as much as you do. Now give me a hug. And a high five for a wonderful evening. To us!”
“To us!” We clinked our mugs together in the air; sisters united.
* * *
I enjoyed a very long lie in the following morning, before calling Annie to arrange a visit. I wanted to pop her bag of goodies round, and also let her know that I wouldn’t make this Wednesday’s meeting as I had a very early flight to catch the next day.
“Have a wonderful time, darling. And don’t get up to anything that I can’t, will you? Or I shall be most jealous!” she giggled.
I messaged Guy to let him know that I’d be missing me
ditation this week, and to thank him for his support over the past couple of weeks.
And then I spent the rest of my Sunday booking a room in Patiala. I’d deliberated over whether to stay with Meeta or not, and although I knew I’d be very welcome, I didn’t want to put Prakash in an awkward position with Matt. Difficult though it was, I decided to not even tell Meeta I was coming until the day before.
My journey to Patiala was a long one, and it seemed very odd to arrive in India and still be needing winter woollies. I was delighted to see Meeta’s friendly face waiting for me at the train station. We threw our arms around each other and jumped in a cab. She told me I was looking too thin and I explained that life was gradually becoming less stressful and so I was starting to enjoy my food again.
“You are very silly staying in a room that you must pay for, Jude. You should come and stay with Prakash and me.”
“That’s so kind of you, Meeta, and I know I’d be welcome, but I didn’t want Prakash feeling awkward. He has to work with Matt after all.”
“Does Matt know you are coming here?”
“No, he doesn’t. I’ve come to spend time with you and Gulab, not Matt. I still miss him, Meeta, but he really hurt me.” I was keen to change the subject, not wanting to involve my friend in the nitty gritty of the horridness. “Anyway, enough of all that; tell me what’s been happening here.”
“Well, Jude, I have some news for you, and I’m so happy you come here so I can tell you. Prakash and me are going to have a baby. It’s still very early but if the pregnancy goes well, the baby will come in July.”
I took Meeta’s hand. “Oh, Meeta. That’s wonderful! Congratulations! Are you feeling ok?”
“Yes, thank you. I feel good but I don’t want to drink any chai!”
“Crikey! That will never do!” We giggled. “Does Gulab know I’ve come back?”
“No, she doesn’t. I think it’s nice to have a surprise for her. She will be so pleased that you are here. We see her in the morning. Are you hungry?”