His Choice of a Wife
Page 2
“I shall deliver your correspondence, madam. I hope your mother’s relations can survive the call without saying anything ridiculous. I offer my best wishes for your health.” He turned to leave.
“Yes, turn away again because those of us in front of you are not worth your notice!”
Darcy quickly rounded on her. “I know not what else to do in the company of your family. Turning away in silence is the way a true gentleman should react to someone who is impertinent or ridiculous!”
The harshness of his words, and the knowledge that he was right about her own impertinence as well as her family’s ridiculous behavior, struck her in her heart, and she began to cry. She could not even blame him for being ungentlemanly, not when she had brought this all upon herself! I have been wretchedly blind! Every thought of it brought new humiliation for the pain she had caused a man who had been sincerely in love with her.
“I am sorry! It was thoughtless, no, cruel of me to dismiss your feelings, and I am sorry to cause you further pain. I acted wickedly just now. There is no reason for me to still be offended by your initial disregard for me.”
She could not be sure whether he was going to bow and leave or stay. After a heartbeat, Mr. Darcy pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and handed it to her.
“That you have more depth of character than Mr. Bingley, I cannot deny,” she continued. She had laid too much blame for Mr. Bingley’s leaving Jane on Mr. Darcy. Mr. Bingley should have had more trust in his own judgment than in his friend’s. “I know that I have been blind, partial, prejudiced, and absurd. I do not wish to hurt you, and I assure you that my spirits shall be tempered should we ever meet again. I suspect your indifference on the occasion, but please forgive me before we part.”
“Neither of our conducts these past two days has been above reproach. Let us put the past behind us and act with greater kindness should we—when we meet again.”
If Mr. Bingley did make an offer to Jane, certainly their paths would cross. The thought of seeing Mr. Darcy again did not distress her the way it had yesterday. “I have no doubt that our future encounters will be cordial. Before you depart, please allow me to thank you for calling on Jane.”
Elizabeth offered her hand in parting. Mr. Darcy must have appreciated the courtesy; he took her gloved hand and, instead of bowing over it, brought it to his lips and bestowed the lightest of kisses. He released her hand and turned back to Rosings before she could respond.
Chapter 2
The following week in Kent passed quickly, and after many parting words from Mr. Collins, Elizabeth and Maria Lucas were on their way to Mr. Gardiner’s house. Elizabeth remained unsure what to communicate to Jane about Mr. Darcy’s proposals and his letter. If she mentioned his involvement in detaching her from Mr. Bingley, it might wound her sister’s spirits further. She did not want to grieve Jane by mentioning Mr. Bingley if he never called—assuming Mr. Darcy had told his friend of calling in Gracechurch Street at all—so she decided to say nothing about it.
She thought of his letter often and read it frequently, and every other free moment was spent passing a retrospective glance over the whole of their acquaintance. It had lately brought her and Mr. Darcy together enough for her to know his ways and habits. His manners were proud, and he was reserved, but with his friends, he was amiable, and there was no denying that he was a clever, handsome man who had loved her enough to be willing to cast aside every family obstacle.
Her behavior towards him was more to be abhorred in recollection than any she had ever passed, and now she would never be first in affection or interest with Mr. Darcy. She could not feel disappointed in refusing his proposal, but on reflection, Elizabeth better understood what she had given up. Hopefully, their meetings would be few if Jane and Mr. Bingley were reunited, so Mr. Darcy would not become an object of regret.
That first evening at the Gardiners’, her aunt said with a smile, “Lizzy, we have had a steady stream of gentlemen callers this week, and I believe it to be your doing.”
Elizabeth raised an eyebrow. What could have happened in town this week while she was in Kent?
***
Darcy had assumed his call to Gracechurch Street would be a tax on his forbearance. However, Mrs. Gardiner was elegant and intelligent—and not simply because she was from Derbyshire. The ladies were surprised on first seeing him, but after he delivered the letters, they then passed a pleasing call by speaking of Elizabeth, providing Mrs. Gardiner with fresh intelligence of the area in which she had grown up, and listening to her impressions of Pemberley and of the character of his late father.
After such enjoyable conversation, he was reluctant to mention a topic that might pain Miss Bennet, but he owed it to her and to Elizabeth to undo the damage he had caused.
“Your sister informed me that you have been here since January. I am certain Bingley is unaware of your presence in town. Would you permit me to tell him I saw you? I believe he would be very pleased to renew the acquaintance.”
Had he not been observing her closely, Darcy might have missed the change in Miss Bennet. Her cheeks pinked at the mention of Bingley’s name, and her eyes went wide when he told her Bingley did not know she was in London. She looked unaffectedly hopeful, and he conceded he might have been wrong about her interest.
Mrs. Gardiner was not as captivated as her niece. “Did Miss Bingley and Mrs. Hurst not mention to their brother that Jane called after she arrived in town? His family may not desire the connection. They did not return her call for over a month. Such behavior leaves one with the impression one does not wish to continue the acquaintance.”
Miss Bennet’s gaze fell to the carpet, and her shoulders fell; Darcy watched her take a deep inhalation before she calmly returned her attention to the conversation.
“Miss Bingley and Mrs. Hurst may have forgotten to mention Miss Bennet to their brother. I shall be sure to tell him when I see him tomorrow that I found you to be in good health,” he told her, treading a fine line between honesty and deceit.
He would confess to Bingley that he was wrong about Miss Bennet’s interest and tell him that he had called at Gracechurch Street. Bingley would be pleased to learn his angel was in town and might not insist on further details of how exactly Darcy knew he had been wrong about her.
***
Bingley was overjoyed to learn Miss Bennet was a short carriage ride away and, aside from being angry at his sisters’ neglect, had nothing more to say. Darcy had asked Bingley’s forgiveness for his impertinent interference, which was immediately granted. Bingley was so dependent on Darcy’s insight that he begged him to join him when he called on Miss Bennet to assure him that her attachment was unabated. Darcy hesitantly agreed, and the two gentlemen called at the earliest possible hour.
They were admitted to the drawing room but were surprised that, instead of two ladies, they found four.
Miss Bennet and Mrs. Gardiner greeted them while two little girls remained seated in what appeared to be their best clothes. Bingley was introduced, civilities exchanged, and the gentlemen sat. Darcy thought Miss Bennet looked paler than she had on Monday though welcoming of Bingley’s eager attention. Mrs. Gardiner, content to leave them to as private a conversation as the room would allow, turned her attention to Darcy.
“We are practicing social etiquette,” she said, gesturing to the girls. “Today my neighbor will call with her daughter, who is the same age as my eldest. We are giving the young ladies an opportunity to practice what they have learned from their cousin Jane.”
Darcy was of a mind to bow and return his attention to observing his friend interact with Elizabeth’s sister. But that would not earn me Elizabeth’s respect and admiration were she present to observe me. So with a wink to the younger girl, who was trying not to stare at him, he asked Mrs. Gardiner to introduce him to her children. The lady gave him a grateful, secret smile.
The little girls rose and the eldest curtsied, but the younger only did so after her sister nudged her and whispered, “You must curtsey to Lizzy’s friend!”
“Ladies, I am pleased to make your acquaintance.”
“Mamma, what do I do now? You already invited them to sit.” Miss Gardiner was clearly agitated that the proceedings had not gone exactly as practiced. Her mother told her a good hostess would now introduce a topic of conversation.
“I can do it!” the younger daughter burst forth. “Mr. Darcy, do not you think that cousin Lizzy is lovely?”
Darcy hoped his expression did not betray him, for Mrs. Gardiner was watching. Miss Isabella possessed some of her preferred cousin’s spirit. “Miss Elizabeth is delightful company.”
Darcy then saw two smaller children he had not noticed upon entering. The youngest Gardiner was masticating a biscuit with a grin on his chubby face. The older boy, not yet in breeches, was struggling with a cup and ball and, with no preamble, approached Darcy to ask him for assistance.
“My apologies,” said Mrs. Gardiner as she maneuvered her son back to the corner. “Young Edward often plays with his father.” Darcy gestured for the boy to come back and patiently showed him how to hold the cup and toss the ball out in order to catch it. They played together for several minutes.
“Tank you, Midter Dawcy!” the little boy cried and ran off to play.
Darcy laughed, and he saw an amused Mrs. Gardiner trying to look busy occupying her children. Miss Bennet watched him out of the corner of her eye with a tender smile, and Bingley stared with his mouth agape with what, Darcy hoped, was more admiration than astonishment.
The servant then showed in a fashionably dressed woman with a little girl, and Darcy and Bingley took their leave. Mrs. Gardiner invited the gentlemen to dine later that week, and they accepted with alacrity. Bingley was granted permission to call on Miss Bennet in the interim, and the gentlemen departed.
Not until Darcy was ensconced in his library that evening did he realize that Elizabeth would return to London in time for his dinner engagement at the Gardiners’. Elizabeth was an incomparable woman, and when he had decided in Kent to propose to her, he knew in his heart that he would marry her or not at all. Darcy longed to know what was passing through her mind at that moment, in what manner she thought of him, and whether he could ever be as dear to her as she continued to be to him.
***
“It has been an agreeable week,” Jane said to Elizabeth after she described in detail Mr. Bingley’s second call. “I hope that we may meet again.”
Elizabeth and Mrs. Gardiner exchanged a look.
“Lizzy, you must not suspect me! I can enjoy Mr. Bingley’s conversation as an agreeable man without wishing beyond it.”
“His agreeableness will make him a favorite among us, but if he were your professed lover, we would enjoy him all the more!”
Elizabeth took delight in the prospect of their relationship and was pleased that Mr. Darcy had kept his word to tell Mr. Bingley that Jane was in town. She was surprised Mr. Darcy had returned and even more amazed to learn that he had become a favorite of her cousins.
“Mr. Darcy was amiable and courteous, Lizzy. From your description of him last Christmas, I feared he would be silent and solemn. Jane commented that he seemed altered from the last time she had seen him.”
Elizabeth listened, wondered, and was impatient for more, but she could not bring herself to ask. She managed to say, in as guarded a manner as she could, that after their encounters in Kent, she found his manners were by no means faulty, and that Mr. Wickham’s were not as amiable as they had been considered to be in Hertfordshire. It had once been her firmest opinion that Mr. Darcy was not a good-natured man. Why is he so altered? It cannot be for me. My reproofs could not work such a change. “Perhaps Mr. Darcy improves on further acquaintance.”
“He was rather serious at first, I suppose. All he wants is a little more liveliness, but perhaps, should he marry prudently, his wife may teach him.” Mrs. Gardiner gave her a look, and Elizabeth feared her aunt might suspect that Mr. Darcy at one time held tender feelings for her. “You may determine Mr. Darcy’s amiability for yourself when he and Mr. Bingley join us to dine.”
Elizabeth could not be certain whether or not the idea of seeing Mr. Darcy so soon answered all her hopes or gave her reason to fear. She suspected the answer would be clearer once she saw how Mr. Darcy behaved in her presence.
The appointed day arrived and, before she knew it, it was time to dress for dinner with the gentlemen. Mr. Darcy had seen tonight’s gown on at least three occasions. Since when do I care about such things? It was not as if she cherished a tender affection for Mr. Darcy; she could not even indulge in the idea that they were friends.
The bell rang promptly at six, and the gentlemen were interrupted by a troop of little Gardiners whose eagerness for their appearance would not allow them to wait inside the drawing room. For a moment, both Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth were immovable as they gazed on one another. She wondered whether he was thinking that she looked lovely or whether he was regretting coming to an evening party where he would be forced to show her a degree of civility. For her part, she found herself smiling at the expectation of some unreserved conversation with Mr. Darcy.
Edward tugged on Elizabeth’s hand and called out, “Lillibet, look! Midter Dawcy is here!”
Mr. Darcy recovered first and greeted everyone with perfect civility, and Elizabeth received his compliments with relative ease. The children bustled around them before being taken to the nursery, the activity giving Elizabeth a moment to reflect, but the tumult of her mind did not allow her to think long on any one subject.
By the time the first course was removed, it was clear that Mr. Bingley would be inattentive to everyone but Jane and that she was eager to receive his attentions. The remaining five at the table did not feel the slight, and to Elizabeth’s surprise, it was Mr. Darcy who took up the conversation and asked Mrs. Gardiner whether she had plans to return to Derbyshire to visit her friends.
“Our intentions were to take a tour of pleasure this summer to the Lakes with Lizzy—”
“I am delighted to go! I shall not tire of speaking of it when I return,” Elizabeth interjected. She then looked at Mr. Darcy, impatient to include him in pleasant conversation. She was still grieved over every ungracious sensation she had previously directed towards him. “I certainly shall be able to recollect to you an accurate idea on everything I shall see!”
Mr. Darcy smiled, but she could not be sure whether he smiled at her enthusiasm for travel or her implication that they might see one another again. It was strange to think that she had once been pleased for any opportunity to avoid him.
“I hate to disappoint you,” said Mr. Gardiner, “but we may be prevented by my business from setting out until the middle of July instead of June. I also must return to London again within a month, so it is doubtful that we shall be able, in that short a period, to travel as far as the Lake District.”
Elizabeth was disappointed but was resolved to be satisfied. “Will a more contracted tour be planned instead?”
“The present plan is to give up the Lakes and go no farther northwards than Derbyshire. There is enough in that country to occupy the chief of our time, as Mr. Darcy would no doubt concur, and Mrs. Gardiner has a strong attraction to the area.”
“Lizzy and Mr. Gardiner will want to take in all the celebrated beauties of the country, but the greatest object of my curiosity will be to visit Lambton. I have several old friends I long to see again.”
“And I am fond of fishing. I hope my wife allows me time to pursue the activity if she does not schedule our entire tour to be s
pent at the homes of her friends.”
Mr. Darcy extended an offer for him to fish as often as he liked at Pemberley and even offered to supply him with fishing tackle. “If I am in the country at the time of your visit, I shall point out those parts of the stream where there is usually most sport,” the younger gentleman added.
Elizabeth found herself smiling at Mr. Darcy when their eyes met across the dining table. She was gratified to see him courting the good opinion of people with whom, a few weeks ago, any interaction could have been a disgrace. She could find no fault in the manners of this Mr. Darcy.
The time came for the women to leave the table, and for Elizabeth and her sister, it would be the most tedious hour, thrown on their own resources in the drawing room with no male company. Fortunately, the young gentlemen were of equal mind and forwent the pleasure of uninhibited talk and drink and soon rejoined them. Elizabeth was making tea, and all she could wonder about was whether Mr. Darcy would approach her and whether she could not offend him. She had tried to provoke him so often in the past that she was now unsure whether she could engage him in pleasant conversation.
“Miss Elizabeth, you are a conversation in my debt.”
She started to see the object of her thoughts next to her. “I beg your pardon?”
“We are not in a ballroom. You owe me a conversation about books, and there is nothing present to distract you.”
“Perhaps the act of pouring your tea will be sufficient enough to occupy my attention.” Was Mr. Darcy attempting to tease her? “I would hate to spill tea and ruin my gown while I quote Coleridge in an attempt to impress you. I would hardly appear to my advantage, and you would not judge me an accomplished lady.”
“I have already made it clear to you what I comprehend in ladies’ accomplishments.”
Elizabeth smiled at the memory of that conversation and wondered how it would have transpired had she not been trying to aggravate him. “Then let us talk of books. Gilpin’s travelogues on the picturesque have occupied me of late, given our plans to travel north.”