Second Sunday
Page 27
“Dang, if that sucker don’t look hot,” Elaine said, fanning herself.
“That’s Huge Hotsy, right?” Miss Hattie Lee said.
“Big Dotsy. Dotsy Hamilton,” Rochelle and Elaine said in unison.
“Well how come my baby, Grady Grey, know somebody who is dressed like he ’bout to go to the club in outer space?”
“He was Grady’s cell mate back in prison,” Elaine said. “Dotsy ended up going back to jail and then doing some more prison time. But Grady always kept up with him and didn’t let up on ministering to him until he got saved.”
“Shhh,” Rochelle said. “Big Dotsy is getting ready to give his testimony.”
Elaine turned up the TV.
Big Dotsy, now Elder Dotsy Hamilton, grinned at the camera, pulled out a silver lamé handkerchief and wiped the glistening sweat off of his bald head, before saying,
“Some of you out there in the viewing audience may have already heard this testimony if you’ve ever visited Jubilee Temple Holiness Church II. So, bear with me because the Lord told me this morning that I had to say this one more time. And I don’t go against what the Lord tells me to do, no matter how small or simple that request might seem to me. See, I spent a life-time of cutting the fool and ignoring the Lord, and I am not trying to go back to that craziness.
“People, God has been good to me. I have been delivered and set free of the hold the Devil had on me. I know you can tell, just by looking at me that I used to like reefers, cheap wine, and women who’d let me hit that giving them some Cold Duck and a few drags off a joint.
“But worse than that was my need to beat up people and shoot at them. Whew, that thang was some fun. I never took drugs stronger than the reefers ’cause nothing gave me a thrill like starting up my car, and running a nig . . . oops . . . a man down the street while I shot at him out of my car window.”
Big Dotsy stopped talking and sat back in the chair and closed his eyes in remembrance of those times. When it appeared as if he wasn’t going to come back from that memory, Apostle Grady Grey shouted, “GONE ARE THE THINGS OF THE PAST.”
Big Dotsy snapped his eyes open and continued.
“Now, I want you good people to know that I never had a desire to kill anybody. I’ve shot more than my fair share of folks. But I can stand here today and tell you that not a one of them died or was seriously injured. And by that, I mean none of my people are in wheelchairs or experiencing a loss of their most important faculties.”
At that point, Linda Grey eased over to Dotsy and slipped him a crumpled piece of paper. He grinned into the camera and said, “Hol’ up,” and read the note. He looked back into the camera and said,
“Durham, it looks as if God wants to keep me honest. And I have to confess an oversight. I never killed anybody or put somebody in a wheelchair. But I did interfere with one brother’s faculties. I was trying to pistol whip him and he wouldn’t stop hollering or keep still. So, I had to shoot him right near the corner of his mouth.”
Dotsy pointed to the area on his own mouth, that crease-part where the top and bottom lips were connected to the jaw.
“His mouth ain’t never set quite right since that unfortunate incident. And he drools just a tiny bit when he drinks too much, sees a sister with a big booty, or gets excited about something, like winning fifty dollars on a scratch-off lottery ticket. But he don’t have to worry about money again. ’Cause I went to prison on account of that, when I pleaded guilty so he could win his insurance case ’cause the hospital didn’t treat him in a timely matter because he was a known thug.”
He started crying, trying to wipe his face dry with that ineffective piece of shiny silver cloth. Finally, one of the choir members ran over and gave him a black face cloth. Dotsy wiped his face and head and fell to his knees.
“Durham, I am a sinner saved by grace. I’ve been the henchmen for people who didn’t want to get their hands dirty but needed some help with folks who were being irreverent towards them. Now, I know you Saints out there are wondering why criminals would be insulted by irreverence. But that ain’t the point. The people they sent me after got hooked up with those people on their own accord. And we all know that when you make deals with the devil, you will have to pay your debt one way or another.”
All of a sudden Dotsy got still and quiet like a very important fact had just occurred to him. He stood back up and got right up on the camera.
“Durham, I want you to know that even though I am telling you the stuff I used to do in a testimony, there is a whole lot I don’t recollect anymore. I asked God to cleanse my memory of all details of my former life and He answered my prayer. And if you don’t believe me, you can come over to Jubilee Temple II any day and give me a lie detector test.”
Apostle Grady Grey ran up to the camera and said, “That ain’t nothing but the truth. We have given Elder Dotsy five of these tests by three different top-rate companies, and he don’t remember a thing. God has completely healed his mind of the past.”
Dotsy looked relieved at Grady’s revelation. He said,
“I know that I don’t look or act like a regular saved man. But I want to tell you people that God brought me here to be a testimony to all of the brothers in jail, and brothers out there acting like they are trying to go to jail. So, for you Saints who’ve always been blessed with the good sense to act right, what I’m about to say and do next, ain’t for you. Yall will have to wait until the next broadcast when somebody who fits the bill for you is on the show.”
Elder Dotsy looked back at the musicians, who started playing a hot and funky hip hop beat.
“Girl,” Elaine said, “I’ve heard that tune on the hip hop station. Or, am I just imagining that?”
“Nahh, Elaine,” Rochelle said, while bobbing her head to the beat. “That tune is to the rapper Young Joc’s song.”
“You mean the one where he telling the people to meet him at the mall?”
Elaine stopped working on Miss Hattie Lee’s head for a second.
“How you know about that song?”
“My grandbabies, Shawanda likes to practice her dance routine on that song, and Lil’ Too Too plays and sings that when he comes by after school to help me with some housework.”
“Lil Too Too in school? Where? Durham Tech?” Elaine asked.
“He went back to school when he got off of house arrest for trying to steal those cases of microwave pancakes from Harris Teeter. You know that baby always did love himself some pancakes. But he is still at Hillside. I know he is not the best student. But it seems to me like the baby would have been able to get out of high school by now.”
“Well, Miss Hattie Lee,” Rochelle said, “If he doesn’t hurry up, they are going to make him leave anyway. And he’s been in trouble with the law. Hillside will try and work with you—but not if you’re too old and acting a fool on top of that. Lil’ Too Too is what? Nineteen?”
“Twenty,” Miss Hattie Lee answered, a bit embarrassed. She didn’t know what was wrong with Lil’ Too Too. All of his cousins were doing fine—good grades, working, and a few were in college.
“He better get it together soon,” Elaine said, “Because they will make him leave at twenty-one. And Lil’ Too Too doesn’t want to leave without that diploma. You better talk to him, Miss Hattie Lee.”
By now Elder Dotsy was getting down, doing a smooth combination of a shout and the “Lean with it, Pop with it” hip hop dance. And when it got real good to him, he said,
“I wrote this rap for those of you out there who are always getting in some kind of serious trouble, and haven’t figured out why you need the Lord and need to get saved. Jesus is coming back, sisters and brothers, and I want all of yall out there to be ready to go and meet Him in the sky. So, this is for yall,” Elder Dotsy said, as he launched into his own gospel rap version of Young Joc’s song.
“When you hear the trumpet sound, it’s goin’ down. . . . When Jesus cracks the sky, it’s goin down. . . . when you rise up off the ground, it’
s goin’ down. . . . when you meet Him in the air, it’s goin’ down. . . .”
The song was getting good to Elder Dotsy, and he really started getting down. The choir, who up until now had been sitting quietly on the set, hopped up and started dancing and singing, adding some harmony to the song. It looked like they were having the time of their lives. Anybody watching the show, who didn’t think that Jesus was somebody they could relate to, would be forced to re-think this assumption.
Apostle Grady Grey and the First Lady came on the camera, as Grady said,
“We are rapidly running out of time. If any of you want to get saved, you need to invite the Lord Jesus into your life right now. Today’s broadcast was for our viewers who have trouble with legal matters. And we want you to know that we have an anointed Post-Prison Ministry, with many success stories. ’Cause I’m here to tell you future Saints that you can not come out of prison, start over, and make it without Jesus. It won’t happen. God wants you to have life more abundantly. Give your life over to Jesus right now.”
Three sets of numbers flashed across the screen.
“Our phone counselors are standing by to minister to those of you who want to get saved right now. They are available to pray with you. And they will work with you to get you to our church, or make a reference to a church that is best suited for your needs.
“See, we want you saved and heaven-bound. So, while we’d love to have you at Jubilee Temple Holiness Church II, our greatest desire is for you to have a church home. Don’t worry about hurting our feelings if our church is not the church for you. God has blessed us with tremendous increase and we are growing by leaps and bounds. So, we don’t care where you go, as long as it’s somewhere.”
“That’s right,” Linda Grey said. “Hallelujah! God led us to let Elder Hamilton do the broadcast this morning to reach people a lot of us Saints can’t reach. And the Lord has laid it on my heart, that there are viewers out there who have just been released from jail and prison, you don’t know where to turn, or what to do, and how to do it the right way.
“Well, you can let all of that go because God cares for you. And He has placed us here this morning to share His Word and let Him use us to get you on your way, which is His way, The Way. Call. Call. Call us in the name of Jesus and watch your life transform right before your eyes.”
“That’s right, call,” Big Dotsy said. “If God had a miracle for me, I know He has one for you. Call us, please.”
The choir came and stood behind the Greys and Elder Hamilton, as the music came on to signal that the show was about to end. The Greys started waving to the camera. Big Dotsy waved and then said,
“I want to send a few shout outs to my three baby mamas, the Child Support Enforcement Social Worker at Durham County Department of Social Services, who taught me about being responsible for my kids, my Parole Officer, Rev. Jerome King, and my seven kids—Dotsy, Jr., Dayeesha, Sheldon, the twins Tawantaye and Tawanaye, Kylone, and the baby girl, Dotsheema.”