No Law Against Love

by Deborah MacGillivray

  “But I’m fa—”

  He stopped her words by putting his hand over her mouth. “If you say you’re fat, I’m going right to my lawyer and get a divorce. Now, I’m going to kiss you and make you forget any insecurities you have.” Before she had a chance to reply, he softly placed his lips on hers and felt her fears begin to melt away. His own fears quickly followed.

  Everything after that was perfect. It was amazing to make love to your best friend. They laughed together when he couldn’t undo her dress’ zipper. They both tugged impatiently when his tie wouldn’t go over his head. And the only shivering they’d done was because of pleasure and not fear.

  He would never think of Janie as overweight again. She was curvy and soft. Her breasts were full and firm, and he made sure he gave both his full attention as he savored their sweet taste.

  While deep inside of her, he felt complete. When she wrapped her legs around his, he felt desire. When he thrust his body and she met each one with abandon, he felt passion. And when she brought him over the edge into oblivion just seconds after he’d brought her there, he’d felt something he should have felt years ago. Undying love.

  ~~~

  Five months of marital bliss. Janie still had to pinch herself every morning when she woke up in Jake’s arms. Their honeymoon had been just a short weekend on the Delaware coast, because she couldn’t take the time off of her kindergarten teacher’s job. And when they returned, she moved into his three bedroom Wilmington home.

  They fell into a pleasant routine. On weekends they either slept in late and read the paper together in bed, or got up early and went for a long drive to find a romantic place to have lunch. Weekday evenings were spent cooking dinner together, then snuggling in bed watching an old movie, or a classic television show. Their only arguments were about him leaving his shoes in the middle of the floor, or her forgetting to turn off a light when she left a room. It didn’t matter much, since their arguments only led to making up, and making up led to making love.

  This time, Jake had been the forgetful one. Janie walked into the auto body shop with his lunch in her hand, when she heard loud voices coming from behind his office door.

  “Just sign the damn papers, Rick,” she heard her husband say.

  “It’s only been five months,” his partner replied.

  Her grandmother had warned her, never, never ever eavesdrop, but her feet wouldn’t move. Her voice couldn’t call out Jake’s name, she couldn’t even clear her throat to alert them of her presence.

  “Dammit, Rick, it’s close enough. I want you out of my shop.”

  “I dared you to stay married to her for six months, Jake, and I’m not signing over my half until then.”

  Suddenly every cell in Janie’s body felt cold. Every moment of the last five months had been a lie. Every time he’d touched her, every sweet kiss he’d given her. Lies! She didn’t know how long she stood behind the door, but she read the look on Jake’s face when he’d opened the door. Guilt!

  “Janie, how long—”

  “Long enough.” She threw his lunch at him and turned to leave.

  She wasn’t sure which was louder, the sound of Rick Mason’s laughter or her husband’s calling her name, but it didn’t matter. She ran out the door and to her car before either one of them had stopped.

  Later that night Janie went home. Not to the Wilmington house, but to her small apartment outside of the city. Donna waited for her with a warm cup of tea and friendly advice.

  First came the tears. Then the men bashing. Finally Donna asked the inevitable. “What are you going to do?”

  “I promised my Catholic grandmother a long time ago I’d never get a divorce. Silly, huh? But I can’t stay married.” Janie sniffed, battling another onslaught of tears.

  “Oh, my God! I just remembered something.” Donna flew out of her chair and went into her bedroom, coming out a minute later with a thick book in her hands. “Remember when I worked at the law office? Well, I remember reading in here that in the state of Delaware you can’t get married on a dare. I thought it a silly law at the time, but now—”

  “But he didn’t dare me. Someone else dared him, is that the same thing?”

  Donna flipped through the book, looking for the right page. Finding it, she said, “It doesn’t specify here. All it says is that it’s illegal to get married on a dare. Someone dared him, so you should be able to get an annulment. Is that what you want to do?”

  ~~~

  Numbly, Jake stared at the papers on his lap. Janie had filed for an annulment. He let out a humorless laugh. Annulment—as if the past five months hadn’t happened. The marriage had been consummated many, many times, but that wasn’t the reason stated by her lawyer. It was all illegal because of that stupid dare.

  He hadn’t seen Janie in a week. When he called and she wouldn’t come to the phone, he high-tailed it to her place only to discover she wouldn’t come to the door, either. Being spring break, he couldn’t even ambush her at school.

  After neatly folding the papers, Jake placed them in the manilla envelope and put them in his glove compartment. The minute he received the certified letter, he’d driven to her apartment. Then he watched and waited for her to walk out the door and get into her car.

  When she finally left, he didn’t go after her. He waited for her to drive off and then got out of his car, walked to the door, and pushed the button under apartment 2C.

  “Hello,” Donna answered.

  “Donna, it’s me, Jake. I need to talk to you.”

  “Go away!”

  “Just one minute.” He ran his fingers through his hair and pleaded, “I promise. Please, Donna!” He had a plan and he couldn’t pull it off without her help.

  After a brief pause, he heard Donna reply a harsh, “Fine.”

  When Jake stood inside, he was met with exactly what he expected. The only thing worse than dealing with the woman whose heart you broke, was dealing with her best friend.

  “You’re an asshole!” Donna said when she’d opened the door.

  Jake walked in. “I know.”

  “You’re a really big asshole!”

  “I know,” he replied and then said, “but I love her, Donna.”

  “Real love, Jake?” she asked rightfully. “Not the ‘hey buddy thanks for helping me move’ kind of love?

  He didn’t need a second to think about it. “No, it’s the ‘I hurt so much from missing her’ love.”

  She studied him. He could feel her scrutinizing gaze and saw in her eyes the instant she believed him.

  “We’re going to Cape May this weekend,” she said suddenly.

  “I know. You always go during spring break.”

  “You won’t make me regret this, will you?”

  Jake gave Donna a reassuring hug and for the first time in a week he felt an ounce of relief. “Not for a minute,” he promised.

  ~~~

  It felt so good to finally be away, Janie thought. In town, she was reminded of Jake everywhere she went. No matter where, she was assaulted by either a memory of them hanging out together as friends, or spending time together as a married couple. So this year more than ever, she looked forward to her weekend in Cape May.

  Donna booked them a room at The Camelot this year. The room had a stove and refrigerator, so it saved them money on dining out. They could spend it at the walking mall instead.

  With her hands filled with grocery bags, she used her knee and a great act of balancing to unlock the door to their room. She pushed open the door and dropped her grocery bags the moment she saw Jake lounging comfortably on the bed. “Where’s Donna?”

  “She decided she’d rather go to Atlantic City this weekend.”

  Janie picked up her bags and placed them on the table. Great, what a turn-coat Donna turned out to be. “What are you doing here?”

  He didn’t move from his position on the bed. “I came to hand deliver the annulment papers. I signed them. They’re over on the table.”

 
She moved her bag and found the papers. It was what she wanted, so why did it hurt so much. “Thank you, you can leave now.”

  Still lying on the bed, he asked, “Did you know in Colorado it’s illegal for a woman wearing a red dress to be out in public after 7:00 p.m.?”

  “What?”

  “It’s true. I found it on this website the other day. And did you know in Georgia donkeys aren’t allowed to be kept in bathtubs?”

  She laughed at that one, couldn’t help herself. “What does that have to do with anything?”

  “Well there’s a lot of stupid laws on the books, some so outdated it’s not even funny. There are others about what you can’t do with a farm animal that I won’t even get into. Then there are those that tell you what you can or cannot do in the privacy of your own bedroom, but let’s just say we won’t be moving to Florida or California any time soon.”

  “We’re not married anymore, Jake. We won’t be moving anywhere together.”

  “This a great town, Cape May. I like it here,” Jake continued as if she hadn’t said a word. He stood up and walked into the kitchen. “New Jersey has it all, doesn’t it? You have Atlantic City, and the beaches, mountains up north. And let’s not forget it’s the birthplace of The Boss and Old Blue Eyes. They do have their own set of ridiculous laws though. Can you believe you’re not allowed to pump your own gas? Or that apparently in Trenton you’re not allowed to eat pickles on Sunday. But you know what, I didn’t find one law about getting married on a dare.”

  “Jake—”

  “Come here, Sweetheart,” he said before he wrapped his arms around her. Looking down into her eyes, he said, “God, this feels so good.”

  She tried to pull away, but his grip was too strong. Or maybe she didn’t try that hard. All these years of being friends with Jake, of loving him from afar, and losing all that after he’d hurt her so badly, he still made her feel like the most beautiful woman in the world. “Jake you’re not—”

  “Not what? In love with you? I dare you to make me feel any differently.” He gave her a peck on the lips. ”I dare you to forgive me.” He kissed her again, this time a brief second longer. “I dare you to tell me you don’t love me anymore.” Again, a longer kiss. “I dare you to marry me again, Janie. Because I am so in love with you. Like a friend, like a lover, like a wife—like hopefully the mother of my children some day. Like a man who couldn’t bear the thought of living without you.”

  This time when he kissed her, he didn’t stop until they were naked in bed. When he’d finished proving just how much he loved her, she asked, “What about the shop? Do you still have to own it with Rick?”

  “Nah, I sold him my half instead. I’m going to open another one across town. I gave him a great deal on it though. I figured no matter how much of a jerk he was, if it hadn’t been for him, I never would have married my best friend.”

  Be sure to check out Michelle’s website

  www.MichelleScaplen.com

  No Laughing Matter

  Patty Howell

  • Virginia - It’s illegal to tickle women

  “All rise.” The clerk of the court preceded the announcement “The Commonwealth of Virginia, Fairfax County Juvenile and Domestic Relations District Circuit Court of Law come to order. The Honorable Judge Judith Perkins presiding.”

  Amid a flourish of swirling black robe, Judge Perkins strode to her aerie of ruling and unlike any court in the land on this day in history, stood before the galleried audience. She slowly pivoted, lifting her eloquently manicured right hand and placed it over her heart. Facing the red, white and blue, star-studded flag of the freest Republic on the face of the earth, she strongly voiced in a rich contralto that echoed throughout the courtroom: “I pledge Allegiance…”

  She glanced sideways at the strangers to the Court who began placing their own right hands over their hearts and conjoining voices to recite the Pledge of Allegiance.

  Judge Perkins pulled the voluminous robe from behind her and assumed her seat on the highest family court in the county.

  “Please be seated,” she announced. She didn’t have to look up to know spectators, court officials and the defendant did as she ordered. Rustling quickly subsided and the courtroom fell silent waiting for her to begin.

  When she finally raised her gaze, signaling she was ready, the clerk of the court stood and called the first case of the day. “The Commonwealth of Virginia versus Cole Harris.”

  Mr. Harris, sitting at the defendant’s table with his lawyer, Michael Byers, looked up at the judge. How would she rule concerning him today?

  “Mr. Harris,” the judge intoned, “please stand.”

  Cole did as she ordered. “Yes, ma’am.”

  “Good morning, Mr. Harris.”

  “Good morning, Your Honor,” Cole said nervously.

  Judith shuffled through prior record papers, although well aware of the charges being brought against this young man. She thought of Cole Harris as young, though he was actually in his mid thirties. After prosecutorial and defense attorney roles, she’d served on this bench for almost twenty years; however, on some days it seemed much longer. Offers of higher courtships had been extended, but she didn’t have any higher aspirations than that of wife and mother, and soon to be grandmother. Plus she enjoyed the stability of her calling in this area of the country. This particular defendant had been before this court many times, all for the same offense. But this was the first time she’d be rendering a ruling in his case. She was the chief justice of the Fairfax County family court system.

  “I assume you know why you’re standing before me today, Cole?” she queried, relaxing the formality of the Court.

  “Yes, ma’am, I do,” Cole offered.

  “And what are those charges?” she inquired, looking down toward the Summons of the Court and just as quickly glancing back at the man standing before her.

  “Uh…ma’am…I believe the charges state I assaulted my wife.”

  “Do you believe you were assaulting your wife?” Judith peered down from her perch, unable to suppress the slight upturn on one side of her lip.

  “According to Virginia’s law, I was assaulting her, Your Honor.”

  The judge folded the file she had in front of her and held it up. “How many times have you stood before this Court, Mr. Harris, for these same charges?”

  “Seven, Your Honor,” Cole stammered. His heretofore strict posture seemed to be imploding, and his six-foot, two-inch frame took on the appearance of a much shorter man.

  “Who brought the charges against this defendant?” she asked, straining to keep the annoyance from her voice from seeping through.

  Stephen White, assistant county district attorney, leaped from his seat at the prosecutor’s table. He’d been sitting there wondering where the judge was going with this line of questioning.

  “Your Honor,” White began, taking several steps toward the bench. “The charges have been brought by the Social Services Department of the County of Fairfax.”

  “And will that office be testifying before this Court today?”

  “Yes, Your Honor, it will.”

  “Fine. Please be seated.

  Shifting her gaze back to the defendant, she said, “Cole, it doesn’t please me to see you here facing these same charges. I thought the last time you stood before this court there was an understanding you’d make certain this matter didn’t come up again.”

  Attorney Byers, who’d been standing aside his client during the querying, raised his hand.

  Judith admired Mr. Byers. He wasn’t like other lawyers who thought they had the power to superimpose themselves upon the Bench just by opening the gaps in their faces and spewing forth words. His manner was authoritative without being offensive and he was extraordinarily polite. What other lawyer would raise his hand for permission to speak? She knew of none.

  “Yes, Mr. Byers? You have something to say to this Court?” she asked, leaning back in her chair.

  “Your Honor…if
it pleases the Court, I would like to state that there have always been extenuating circumstances surrounding my client being taken into custody for the offenses he’s said to have committed.”

  “Objection,” Prosecutor White shouted, leaving his chair, right index finger extended to the ceiling.

  Objection? Judith blinked and did a double-take, looking at him quizzically, not sure she’d heard correctly.

  “Uh…alleged offenses, Your Honor.” The prosecutor lowered his hand and resumed his seat.

  The defense attorney glanced from the judge to the prosecutor, then back to the judge and shrugged his shoulders. “Well, they’re hardly alleged if the perpetrator of the offenses admits to them,” he stated, wondering why on earth a prosecutor would refer to the offenses as alleged. Wasn’t it usually the purview of the defense to question the charges?

  Judith returned her astounded expression from the prosecutor to the defense attorney. “Overruled. Please continue, Mr. Byers.”

  “Of course, Your Honor, thank you. As I was saying, my client never meant to dismiss this Court’s earlier rulings and recommendations. But, I believe we will be able to prove my client’s innocence even though he admits to breaking the law.”

  “That’s a rather ambiguous statement, so I’ll have to take your word for it at this point. Proceedings on this case are now open and I’ll hear the case at this time.”

  Nodding toward the clerk of the court, Judith waited for the courtroom to clear of all people not wishing to witness the current hearing. Lawyers and their clients who awaited other hearings stood and exited the court. All but a few family members and a handful of curiosity seekers decided they’d rather be elsewhere and vacated the courtroom.

  The most evident member of the audience was the defendant’s wife, Kathryn Harris. She sat in the first row, behind and a little to the right of her husband, so that just by slightly turning he could view her pretty face and familiar, supportive smile. Judith noticed the loving eye contact made by the couple. Two well-behaved young children flanked their mother, who’d been granted permission for their attendance in the courtroom. Mrs. Harris had explained she wanted them to witness their country’s judicial system in action.