by Devon Shubin
Now, the leader of the Bodas is King Beziah. He is not the largest, ugliest or smartest of the Bodas. But, is royalty and what you get is the way it is so hang in there during this chapter. Regardless of how the beings look, act or treat the Space Traveler, his job is to identify dlom, provide recommendations on how to eradicate it and protocols on preventing it. Right now, our Inspector, the Space Traveler is in a pickle. He has absolutely no idea why the dlom is morphing into a flesh-eating organism.
The large ship hovers above the mountainous city a few hundred feet below. Fretch is reading the ships manual still while the Space Traveler looked into the monitor at the city. He can see a large concentration of beings around the foothill entrance of the caverns.
“Computer, set us down at that meadow. Coordinates are 41 degrees by 12.”
The digital voice acknowledged, “Yes Captain.”
“Alright Fretch, just follow my lead, and whatever you do, don’t say anything to the King, he’s got a second-guessing himself disorder.”
Fretch snorted, “No problem.”
The Space Traveler was trying not to allow his new assistant’s idiosyncrasies to annoy him. But with all the snorting and one liners it was becoming increasingly tough. He missed his robot girls.
The large space ship slowly lowered down toward the flat meadow. Looking out, The Space Traveler could see that their presence attracted the attention of the large group of Bodas. It also appeared that the cavern entrance was blocked by somethings reflecting off the sunlight. He zoomed the camera in on the cavern entrance and sure enough the entrance was blocked. “Metallic boulders?” He said to himself, which grabbed the attention of Fretch who looked at him and then snorted. The Space Traveler just rolled his eyes and stood up leaving his Captain’s chair. He then walked away and Fretch said to himself, “Was it something I said?”
When the ship landed in the flat meadow, the Space Traveler opened the main door and it lowered onto the ground. Usually 41-A was there to see him off or join him. But she was no more. Fretch was behind him now. He could feel the pig-man’s heavy breathing and bad breath. ‘One more snort,’ he thought, ‘and I’m leaving him hear for the Bodas, who love pork.’ Instead, he looked at his new assistant and smiled.
Fretch just stared at him and then picked his large right nostril. After a large round booger fell from that same nostril and onto the floor, the Space Traveler looked down at it. He then looked back up at Fretch as if saying ‘pick it up,’ but he didn’t. Instead, Fretch went for the second nostril and removed a slimy one. “Got a towel?” He said to his new boss.
The Space Traveler shook his head yes, “It’s in the restroom. And, as a matter of fact, stay here on the ship until I call you. I want to see what’s really going on and if we can help.”
“No problem,” Fretch said as he walked away from the fallen booger on the floor into the restroom, hopefully to wash his hands. Probably not though, the Space Traveler thought. “Well, you get what you pay for,” he said out loud as he walked down the ramp and onto the planet of Lordak Pogna.
He clicked on his forearm to activate his jet boots and up he hovered. Flying toward the foothills he could see many Bodas camping out along the foothills with fire pits flaming. Up ahead the King of the Bodas, Beziah, was sitting on his royal throne in a courtyard with his army surrounding him. Now, the Bodas do not believe in weapons, they fight with their mouths, because they look like a dragon head remember. Their teeth are swords and spears, sharp and strong. Even though they are a gentle people, they are very territorial, after the war with the Huffrans and all.
The King looked up in the sky and saw the Space Traveler approaching. “Good,” he said in his language, “our Inspector is here to save the day.”
The Space Traveler clicked on his language translator earpiece and set it to Boda. He looked back up at the King who was waving to him. Then the King stopped waving. He lowered his head. Then he looked back up and started waving again.
“Same old indecisive King Beziah,” he said to himself as he then waved back to the King.
When the Space Traveler landed in the courtyard the King greeted him by clapping his two-front hand/feet. Then he stopped, “That may be inappropriate,” He said, “oh well,” he began clapping again.
The Space Traveler shut down his jet boots and approached the King. He bowed to him, “Greetings your majesty.”
“Hello Inspector, how glad we are to have you here today. We are in dire straits. There is a rebellion against me and my empire. The rebels have closed themselves up in the mountains and have stolen the sivle, our ingredient for food.”
“Sivle?” he inquired.
“Yes, it is a salt like powder we use when cooking the sea life. You do remember we only eat sea creatures. There are no land animals on Lordak Pogna, not after the war that is.”
“Yes, yes King, I remember. Sivle is very important to your taste buds.”
“Yes! Very important. Have you ever eaten a moskuldikle without sivle? Yucky. No thank you. But, then again maybe we have to if we never get our sivle back.” He lowered his head in sadness.
The Space Traveler knew the King all too well. He would need to encourage him to make the right decision. “King, let’s try and focus here. What do the rebels want?”
“Well, this is an outrage I will tell you. They have a leader, the leader of the rebels is Amrodian Jypie, he was my best friend as a child, now, his envy of my Kingship has turned him against me. He wants my throne and to rule all Lordak Pogna. That will never happen I can assure you.”
“I agree with you King we will never let that…”
The King interrupted him, “Maybe I should give in so we can have our sivle back,” the King said as he lowered his head in sadness again.
“King! I need you to be decisive and strong for your people ok!”
That forceful statement woke the King up and his guards as they approached the Space Traveler in aggression. Revealing their large sharp teeth, they began growling. The King was growling too.
“Hold on, hold on there, fellas,” the Space Traveler said to them as he held his hands out in self-defense, “I am only trying to help your King to be the strong, great leader he is. You can never give in to threats against your royal line. You are King of the Bodas! Now act like it and tell me what I can do to help?”
“Army, back off! Inspector, you are right. I am King and I say I want you to go inside the caverns and destroy the army so we can get our sivle back.”
The Space Traveler just stared at the King with a very serious face. The King was serious for the moment also. He waited a moment longer after thinking about his previous dealings with this King. He knew the King in his mind was serious about this request. Even though it sounded impossible and ridiculous to the Space Traveler. He also knew that King Beziah would change his mind very soon, if he waited.
“O.k., I’ll do it.” The Space Traveler exclaimed as he held his hand up in the sky.
Everything went silent in the courtyard. The army of Bodas were all showing their giant sword like teeth, but were silent and still. The King was grinning like an idiot too, but he was thinking. Then, all the Bodas cheered, “Sivle!” they cried in their language and started doing the craziest looking dancing, you remember they have eight feet/hands, so just imagine what that looks like.
The Space Traveler just smiled and spoke into his forearm intercom, “Fretch, come in.”
Fretch finally clicked over, “Yeah!”
“Fretch, come on out of the ship and bring the two bags near the door.”
Snorting first, he replied, “No problem.”
The Space Traveler cringed when he heard the snort combined with that statement from his stinky new assistant. He soon let go of the annoying feeling he was displaying as he was too amused by the Boda’s who were hollering and dancing like a bunch of imbeciles. He just smiled at them as they continued prematurely celebrating.
When the Space Traveler and Fretch were at the mout
h of the cavern, which was blocked by large metallic boulders, he had to inquire of the King, “Tell me, you exported the metals from Wurtha right?”
“Yes. Why, is that a problem? It’s a problem, isn’t it? I knew it, it’s a failed mission lets go home everybody,” the King started walking away.
“King!” the Space Traveler raised his voice. The King turned around facing him.
“King,” he said gently, “Please focus on the mission and the success we will have, if we don’t give up.”
“You are right Inspector. We won’t fail. I need to focus. Platinum boulders. Yes, I traded them with the Queen of Wurtha. She is not a nice being did you know that? The transaction failed many time and finally successful some 48 times I think. Is that right counsel?” he looked over at two of the royal assistants and they shook their heads up and down while their long tongues wagging up and down like a dog. Dorky looking creatures these Bodas. But they are nice, for the most part.
“Ok, so you traded with the Wurthians their metallic boulders, for what?”
“Water, they have no water, so, we traded water by teleporting it in exchange.”
The Space Traveler scratched his purple noodle like hair, “So, you do know that importing and exporting is regulated by USHA, right? Did you run proper protocol with headquarters before you did that?”
The King looked at his royal assistants who shook their heads no. The King lowered his head and started to make a b-line for the pathway saying, “Time to call it a day. Let’s give up army of Bodas.”
The Space Traveler grabbed the Kings robe, “No!”
The army of Bodas approached him with seething teeth, hissing.
“See, your army of Bodas have a strong desire to protect you King, but you do not seem to have a strong desire for the cause. You give up too easily.”
The King called off the hissing army of dragon faced like Bodas, “Down men, down. You are right Inspector. I do need to support the cause. And I will. But, what does this all mean?”
He looked around at the army of Bodas and then back at the King, “I don’t know, but we are going to find out.”
Just then, with impeccable timing Fretch decided a snort was important. The King and army of Bodas looked at him. He shrugged his shoulders. The King said to Fretch, “That is an annoying habit, stop that or I will eat you.”
Fretch pinched his nostril shut with his fore fingers, he didn’t want to be eaten of course.
The Space Traveler tried now to get everyone back on track, “Okay, King, let me investigate and see if this has to do with dlom.”
“Dlom!” The King gasped as his eyes lit up. “This is not a dlom problem! It’s a jealous problem!”
“Try not to worry King, let’s not jump to any more conclusions. Let us do our work and I will report back to you with what I find.”
“I agree Inspector,” he said and then shrugged his shoulders, “Or maybe we should just give up.”
The Space Traveler gave the King a stern frown and then he waved Fretch to follow him to the cavern entrance. The King looked at his army of Bodas and hissed. They hissed back.
At the entrance, the Space Traveler looked at the blockade and asked Fretch, “Well, can you slither your way through this?”
Pitching his nose still he answered, “I can, but what then?”
“You’re right, I need to be in there with you. Look in the second bag, the one with the white trim. There is a charged explosive in there.”
Fretch opened the bag and found the rectangle explosive. “Got it,” he said.
“I want you to slither your way to the center of the blockade and set it in center of the metallic boulders. Then set the timer to two minutes. Slither your way back out, and be quick about it.”
“No problem,” Fretch said as he grabbed the explosive and fearlessly walked to the mouth of the cavern. He raised his arms up and stretched his body and limbs growing almost ten feet tall and slender as a python. He crawled his way through the holes between the large boulders and disappeared.
The King of the Bodas looked at his men and stuck his long tongue out, “Ooooo, that’s creepy.” The army of Bodas starting hissing.
The Space Traveler just ignored the duffiss beings and called out to Fretch, “Did you set it?”
Three strands of unkempt hair first appeared through the hole between the metallic boulders, and then Fretch’s bald head appeared. He slithered his way out of the blockade of boulders. Then he grabbed the ground and rolled up in a ball and began shrinking back to his normal stocky self. The Space Traveler shook his head in approval.
Fretch stood up, shrugged his shoulder and said, “No problem.”
The Space Traveler shrugged his shoulders and responded, “What, no snort?”
All the Bodas chimed in, “NO PROBLEM!” they chanted.
Just then the explosive detonated and the metallic dust and rocks shot out from the mouth of the cavern. The dust cloud of silver would be a sadness for you and me, because it has monetary value on our planet. The Bodas like metals because they are shiny, and the planet has no heavy metals. Everyone was covered with platinum colored dust.
The King started licking himself and the army of Bodas imitated him. The Space Traveler looked at the metal colored pig-man Fretch and said, “That was not two minutes.”
Fretch did not need to answer him, the proof was in the platinum. The Space Traveler stared at his dumb assistant. He could see in his mind the fire pit roasting him over a large kabob, rotating the pig-man around while the Bodas were licking their lips, ready for dinner tonight.
He wanted to rip the pigs face off, but as the dust cleared the mouth of the cave, he could see it was wide enough so he could enter. He forgot all about the stupidity of his new assistant and began walking up to the mouth of the cave. He peeked in, it was a dark cavern of nothingness. Turning to question the King one last time he asked, “So there’s nothing else you want to tell me before I go down there and mediate for you?”
The King looked at his army of Bodas and responded, “Nope. Get our sivle back Inspector. Save the day.”
“Ok, that’s the type of King I like to hear.” The Space Traveler said as he swung his two bags full of testing equipment inside and began climbing into the cavern. Fretch followed him, this time in normal form.
As the two explorers walked down the cavern, the Space Traveler hit a light on his forehead and the tunnel illuminated. An involuntary snort came from Fretch who stared out into the darkness. They both froze and the Space Traveler had to speak up. “Fretch, I need to know you can control that snorting of yours. Because if we need to spy on the rebels you are going to give us away and this may be the last time you snort…got it?”
“Yeah, no problem,” he replied as he stared out into the dark tunnels.
He wanted to laugh at the pig-guy, but he held it inside because he didn’t need any more awkwardness with beings today, not after dealing with the King of the Bodas. They continued walking down through the long dark passages of mount Boda.
After ten minutes, Fretch asked, “How much longer?”
The Space Traveler wanted to say something very sarcastic like, ‘well, the last time I was on vacation here it took fifteen minutes,’ or perhaps he could say, ‘well Fretch, I don’t recall because tunnel browsing isn’t my thing, I like sewage fishing.’ Instead, he just kept walking along while his flashlight illuminated the path in front of them. Fretch held back a snort, cough, sneeze thing and it echoed down the tunnels. They both froze. In the darkness Fretch could feel the tension emitting from his new boss who looked at him. A couple seconds went by and Fretch whispered, “Sorry.”
Eventually they came to an opening where a powder substance was covering the ground in some areas. It looked as if the sivle was being drug in bags and some spilled out across the ground. The two explorers followed the evidence down to a fork in the tunnel. All three pathways had some evidence of the sivle at the entrances.
“Well, detective?” Fre
tch said. Perhaps he was picking up on the Space Traveler’s personality.
The Space Traveler giggled, “Good one snorty. Maybe it’s time to split up. Think you can handle it?”
“No problem.”
“You like saying that, don’t you?”
He could see the pig-man shrug his shoulders in the dimness.
“Ok, here is an earpiece so we can communicate. You know how this works?”
“Yeah, I used them when I was fishing in the sewers.”
The Space Travelers mouth dropped. He knew that the fat little fart was a mind reader. “When were you going to tell me that you have the ability to read thoughts?”
“I assumed you knew, it’s in my file.”