Truth

by Julia Karr

  XXVI

  I’d expected Dee to be the one bounding out of bed at five a.m., not me. Although I didn’t exactly bound. Even my usual burrowing under the covers couldn’t coax more sleep, so I got up, went to the kitchen, and started our usual Holiday morning routine—fresh cinnamon rolls, coffee, and orange juice.

  Dee padded into the kitchen as I was taking the rolls out of the cook center. “It smells just like Holiday.” She sighed. “I wish Mom was here.”

  “Me, too.” I filled a cup with coffee and stirred in two spoonfuls of sugar. Making the cinnamon rolls might not have been my best idea. Ginnie had always done it, though. I didn’t want the day to be sad, but maybe that was just wishful thinking. How could it not be without her. Without Gran and Pops.

  “What are you doing?” Dee asked. “You hate coffee.”

  “I’m learning to like it.” I took a sip of the murky brew and promptly spat it into the sink.

  Dee laughed. That was a better start to the morning.

  “Let’s go see if any presents miraculously appeared,” Dee said.

  I knew there would be one for Dee, from me.

  “Lookie here.” She sounded just like Pops. “A present for Little Bit.” She handed me a thin rectangular box, wrapped in silver paper with a gold bow on top.

  “Lookie there.” I’d hidden her present behind Gran’s poinsettia. “Something for Deedles.”

  She retrieved a loose roll of paper with a ribbon tied around it. “I hope Pops is okay. Did you call?”

  “Yeah. They won’t let him have visitors.” I didn’t want Dee to start crying, or me either, for that matter. “I wonder what this could possibly be?” I held up the present she’d given me. “It’s definitely not alive.” Shaking it, I said, “No small parts. Hmmm . . .” I studied it. “I wonder what it––”

  “Open it already!”

  “You think?” I teased the ribbon loose and unsealed the paper. Inside was an animated digi of Ginnie and me. “Oh, Dee! It’s ultra! How on earth did you do this?”

  “Chris helped. He’s so great.”

  Yeah, I thought, he is pretty great. First my tattoo, well, first helping us move and everything else he’d done since then . . . and how sweet he was.

  “So what is this? A telescope?” She held the roll to her eye. “Nuh-uh. A straw?” She tried to get her mouth around it. “No way.”

  “Dee!”

  “Yes, ma’am!” Untying the ribbon, she unrolled the paper to reveal a drawing of her at five years old, sitting in Mom’s lap. They were reading a real book. She sucked in her breath. “It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.” Her cheeks glistened. “This is the best present ever.”

  We finished off breakfast and had just settled in front of the FAV to watch Home for Holiday, since Dee’d slept through it last night and I could watch it a million times, when Dee’s PAV beeped.

  After a brief conversation, she clicked off and said, “That was Miss Maldovar. She’s going to bring by some presents at ten.”

  “She is?”

  Dee got up. “Yep. You think she’d like it if I made her cookies?”

  “I’m sure she’ll like anything you do.” I did not understand this woman’s big interest in Dee. Was it just a tender heart toward a girl who’d lost her mother? I was not likely to figure it out in the next few hours, so I turned on the FAV and zoned out on my favorite vid.

  I kept an eye out for Miss Maldovar, not wanting her arrival to bother the Jenkinses. When a hire trannie pulled up, Dee was in the kitchen, so I ran to the front door. She came in, followed by the driver, who was loaded down with bags and boxes. He deposited the packages inside, and I couldn’t help but notice his face when she tipped him. His Holiday was made.

  “It smells wonderful in here,” she said. “Who’s the baker?”

  “Dee. She’s making some of our grandmother’s Holiday recipes.”

  “I’m not surprised. She’s so smart.” She shrugged off her coat and threw it over the back of Pops’s chair. “I hope you don’t mind that I got a few presents for Dee. I know how difficult it must be for you with all the family issues you’ve had. I’m sure finding credits for presents was not high on your list of priorities.”

  “That’s very nice of you.” Something about the way she talked to me raised my hackles. The woman was a definite trigger for my danger radar—especially with the obscene number of presents she’d brought. One or two would’ve been normal; this was excess to the outer limits. “You really didn’t need to do anything.”

  “I know. However, I wanted to. Dee’s been such a big help to me so far. And as the semester progresses, I’m sure she’ll continue to shine as my assistant.” She glanced at the mountain of gifts. “I might have gone a little overboard, but it was so much fun buying for a Pre.”

  Dee came in from the kitchen. “Miss Maldovar!” She wiped her floury hands on the apron she was wearing, then she noticed the presents. “Those are for me?”

  “Nearly all of them,” Miss Maldovar said. “I did buy a few things for your sister.” She flashed me an all-teeth, no-eye-crinkles smile. “I didn’t want you to feel left out.”

  “Thanks.” I should have been curious, and maybe I was a little, but mostly I wanted to know what was behind her generosity. “Would you like some coffee? Maybe some cookies?”

  “Cookies for sure!”

  Dee brought in a plate of cookies and set it on the table. Miss Maldovar watched as Dee unwrapped what ended up being an entire wardrobe of clothes and accessories from Mars 9. It must have cost Miss Maldovar a fortune.

  She had gotten me a beautiful ultrachic sweater, TT brand all-weathers, and a gift certificate for two hundred credits at Mars 9. More than I could possibly have imagined.

  Dee was modeling her new clothes for us when Wei came downstairs. It was her first introduction to Miss Maldovar, who was as smooth with Wei as she was with me.

  “Mom sent me down to tell you that dinner’s in an hour,” Wei said. “And Chris was wondering if Dee would mind helping him with your grandmother’s pie recipe.”

  “Let me change.” Dee snatched up her new outfits. “I’ll be right back.”

  “Are you spending Holiday with your family?” Wei asked Miss Maldovar.

  “No,” she said. “My parents are no longer with us, and my brother is out of the country.”

  “Oh, that’s too bad.” She frowned. “Tell Dee to come on up.” As she opened the door, she motioned me over and whispered, “Do you mind if I ask Mom if she can stay for dinner? There’s more than enough food, and it’s kind of sad that she’s alone.”

  “I guess not.” I glanced over at Miss Maldovar, who was engrossed in her PAV receiver. “I don’t trust her, but she’s been more than nice to Dee and me. It can’t hurt, right?”

  “I’ll call you right back.” Wei rushed up the stairs, taking them two at a time. Practically before I sat back down, my PAV beeped. “Mom says ask her.”

  “Would you like to join us at the Jenkinses’ for Holiday dinner?” I asked. “Mrs. Jenkins would love it if you could.”

  “What?” Dee came into the room. “Are you going to have dinner with us? That would be beyond ultra!”

  “I guess it’s settled, then,” Miss Maldovar said. “Please, tell Mrs. Jenkins I’d love to join all of you.”

  “We’ll come up in a few,” I said to Dee. “I don’t want to be in the way.” And, as uncomfortable as I was around Maldovar, I thought maybe a bit of time alone with her might give me a clue as to why.

  After Dee left, Miss Maldovar said, “I used to love Holiday. Up until I was a Pre, my parents would always buy my brother and me matching sweaters. After twelve, though, you don’t necessarily want to look like your twin.” She gave a wistful laugh. “Teddy and I were always close, though.”

  “You have a twin?” I said. “I’ve never met twins. Do you look alike?”

  “No. We’re fraternal.”

  “Does he live in Chicago?”

&
nbsp; “No. He lives in the suburbs.”

  I hated small talk, but I kept on chatting. Something told me there was more to Miss Maldovar’s story. I wasn’t sure what, but I wanted to find out. “Do you see him often?”

  “I used to, but I haven’t seen him in a while.” A disturbance crossed her face, so quickly I might have missed it if I hadn’t been looking closely.

  “I bet you miss him. I would be lost without Dee.”

  She gave me the oddest look. “I do miss him. Although as siblings grow older, they are not always as connected as when they were young.”

  I was running out of things to say. “Thank you again for coming to the hearing and giving us your support.”

  “I was glad to do what I could to assist Dee. Families should never be torn apart.”

  The ensuing silence lasted for what seemed like forever, until Dee walked in. “I want to wear one of my new outfits for dinner.” She beamed at Miss Maldovar. “And I almost forgot the Holiday bread I made yesterday. It’s my present to the Jenkinses.”

  Following her lead, I changed into my new TTs and the sweater, and upstairs we all went.

  ***

  Dee and Chris’s dinner was delicious. There was seitan roast stuffed with a nut-and-veggie mixture, mashed potatoes, the most delicious gravy (I’d never tell Gran it was better than hers, but it was!), fruit sauces, and a whole tableful of exotic foods I’d never heard of. And to top it off, Chris had baked two pies—cherry and Gran’s green-tomato mince pie.

  It was the first time I’d ever met Wei’s older sister, Angie, and her husband, Leo. Angie and Leo were originally supposed to have our apartment, but they had turned it down. It didn’t surprise me, now that I’d met them. They were so different from the rest of the Jenkins family. It was obvious that Angie didn’t fit in with her family.

  “We’re going to Leo’s parents’ at four.” Angie picked at her food.

  While Miss Maldovar engaged Leo in small talk, Angie, who was sitting next to me, said, “Nice sweater.”

  “Thanks.”

  “And your sister”—she nodded toward Dee—“good taste. She looks like a XVI Ways vert.”

  Angie was right. Dee did look exactly like a Pre was supposed to, which bothered me. But she loved the clothes. Just because she was dressed that way didn’t mean she thought like a Pre, or was going to act like one. People like Wei wore ultrachic, and she was about as far from being a snob or a sex-teen as anyone I knew. As full as I was, my belly felt suddenly empty. You can’t figure out who’s who by appearances. No matter how much the government or the Media, or even your friends, say you can. You can’t know who a person is unless you get to know him or her. That was the truth.

  Wei snapped me out of my philosophical reverie. “You could take some of this food to your grandmother, if you want. Please?” She bent toward me conspiratorially. “Or we’ll be eating leftovers till New Year’s.”

  XXVII

  After dinner, Angie and Leo offered to give Miss Maldovar a ride home on their way to Leo’s folks. Wei sent Dee and me downstairs with bags of leftovers.

  Dee and I made a quick visit to Gran with some of the food. She was in good spirits and ready to move to the rehab center. We didn’t stay long because Maddie’s mom was bringing her, and most of her Holiday bounty, over for the afternoon.

  After Maddie arrived, I filled two bags with the rest of the leftovers Wei had insisted I take. My plan was to give them to Joan and the other homeless women. Chris was coming in as I was leaving. “You want a ride wherever you’re going?” he asked. “That’s a lot of stuff to carry on the transit.”

  “No thanks.”

  “You sure? I don’t mind.”

  “I’m sure.”

  “Well, have fun.” He held the door for me.

  I was as eager to carry out my tasks alone as I was to stay away from Chris’s twinkling eyes and ultra smile. Whenever I was with him, I felt a freedom I couldn’t quite explain. He didn’t try to save me or do things for me; instead, he treated me like I was equal to the tasks in front of me. That made me feel powerful. It was nice to know someone trusted me to take care of myself.

  The bags full of food bumped against the transit steps as I got off in front of our old apartment building. I lugged them along the riverfront. There was no sign of life, except for me. Clouds scuttled across the bleak, winter sky, and a brisk wind swept down the choppy waters. My arms were killing me. Stopping at the DZ oasis, I pulled my coat collar tighter. “Maybe I’ll use those credits at Mars 9 to get a new scarf.” I’d taken one of Ginnie’s from among her things, but it was too thin to provide much protection from the Chicago winds. I hoped my old scarf was keeping Joan warm.

  No sooner had I thought that than I caught movement between two buildings. Grabbing the bags, I headed across the street, slipping into the shadows along with the homeless women. “Joan?”

  She separated herself from the group and drew near to me. A gust of wind blew her hair back, and I noticed her neck was bare. “Where’s the scarf I gave you?”

  She flipped the collar of her tattered coat up and shook her head. “Why are you here?”

  “Today’s Holiday.”

  The other women circled around us. I felt, more than saw, their eyes rake over me. “She’s the one that keeps coming around,” said the woman who’d acted as Joan’s protector earlier. “Get us in trouble with the checkerheads for sure.”

  I gave Joan a questioning look, but she cast her eyes down, toeing the snow with her worn shoes.

  “I brought some food.” I held out one of the bags to Joan.

  She stuck her hand inside and pulled out a container of leftover roast and potatoes. The woman who seemed to be in charge snatched it away from her.

  “Trying to poison us?” She waved the container in front of me.

  My mouth fell open. “Why would I do that? I’m Joan’s friend.”

  “Homeless got no friends. Cleanup Committee sent you, didn’t they? Been trying to get rid of us for months. Don’t like us dirtying up their precious waterfront park.” She swung her arm in the direction of the river. It was then I noticed my scarf around her neck.

  “What are you doing with—”

  Joan touched my arm. “I gave it to Svette,” she whispered.

  “Look.” I pulled a plasticene fork from inside the bag, popped the lid off the container, and took a bite. “See? It’s not poisoned.”

  That was enough to do it. The women swarmed over the food. Not bothering with utensils, they silently wolfed it down.

  “I’ll bring more soon,” I said.

  “You’ll get caught,” Joan said. “If the police see you doing this, they’ll arrest you.”

  “They don’t care,” I said with much more confidence than I felt. Could I get arrested for feeding homeless? I supposed it was possible.

  The women dispersed into the shadows, and I gathered up the bags and empty containers.

  “You there,” a voice called me to a halt.

  I turned around and found myself face-to-face with a Chicago policewoman.

  “Yes, Officer?” I kept my voice as steady as I could. After what Joan had said, I was terrified.

  “ID.” Her voice was sharp as the cold that cut through me.

  She wanded my outstretched hand.

  “The address on your ID is incorrect. You no longer live there.” She jerked a thumb toward our old apartment building. “You were evicted.”

  “Yes, ma’am.” At least my voice wasn’t quivering as bad as my insides were. Had she been watching me? Did she know about the food? Was I going to be arrested?

  “What’s in the bag?”

  “Empty food containers,” I said.

  She gave a cursory glance to the empty bags before focusing more of her attention on the surrounding neighborhood. “Robbery earlier. A deserted riverfront’s no place to be hanging out alone. I suggest you go home. And see that you get that address fixed. If it wasn’t Holiday, I’d give you a citation
.”

  Lucky me.

  ***

  After Maddie left, Dee and I spent the rest of the evening putting together outfits with the clothing and accessories that Miss Maldovar had given to Dee. By the time we were through, it was long past Dee’s usual bedtime, and I was exhausted, too.

  I was nearly asleep when Sal called. “Wish I was there with you right now.”

  The mere sound of his voice sent tingles through my body. “Isn’t there some way that I can go with you when you do whatever it is you and John do?” I asked.

  “Absolutely not. What we’re doing is, well . . . dangerous.”

  “Isn’t everything related to the Resistance dangerous?” The warm feeling I’d had melted away. “Just because I’m a girl doesn’t mean I’m helpless.”

  “I know that. But, well, in some ways you are. I mean, the whole Ed thing . . .” His voice trailed off.

  I was warm again—actually downright hot—but with anger. “I didn’t have a choice. Wei needed help. There wasn’t anyone else to call.”

  “That’s what I mean. Besides, how could you have moved his body, huh? Deadweight. It took two hulking guys to—”

  “So? It might have taken three or four girls to do the same, but we could’ve done it. Girls are just as capable . . . Take my mom—she was a NonCon. She managed to get all that information about FeLS and—”

  “Look at what happened to her.”

  I drew in a sharp breath. “How. Dare. You,” I clicked off before he could say another word. If it hadn’t been for Dee asleep in the next room and the Jenkinses overhead, I would’ve screamed. Could Sal not see that I was just as capable as he was in fighting for what was right? My mother’s sacrifice for the cause was no less valid or less important than some guy’s. Men were killed just as easily as women. Murder was not gender-specific.

  Wrestling my way out of the tangle of blankets, I stumbled out of bed and over to the window. The moon cast tree shadows on the snowy ground, and I stared at them until my feet were frozen. Crawling back into the bed, I couldn’t turn off the thoughts.

  My dad had been the one to go underground, leaving my mother and me supposedly out of danger. While he was fighting from the relative safety of secret hideouts—like Aunt Rita’s place—Ginnie had put herself in danger every moment of every day. And not just to keep my father’s secret safe, but to discover the truth about FeLS. With Ed as her only connection to the truth, she had endured beatings and abuse whenever he felt like it. She dropped down tiers for the cause—she had been a tier-five once and had died a tier-two.