by Jane Toombs
“Nemesis?” Eva said.
“Because when he’s on a case, he always gets the bad guys,” Sonia explained.
“Rachel’s certainly no bad guy!”
“Don’t forget finding her was his wedding gift to his best friend, Steve, the man who married Renee’s sister.”
Eva grimaced.
“She doesn’t want to be convinced Mikel might be one of the good guys,” Rachel told Sonia.
“Will you stop defending him.” Eva sputtered. “If he’s so great, how come he took off without a word to any of you?”
Rachel, who was searching her memory for where and when Mikel had used the word, Nemesis, didn’t answer and she didn’t listen to Sonia’s response.
They’d been in the loft and she’d just told Mikel he was someone who couldn’t be swerved off-course.
“Nemesis, in fact,” he’d said. She hadn’t understood the darkness in his voice at the time, but she did now.
He’d kissed her then and the world had gone away. Rachel sighed. Whatever Mikel had been called, now he was gone and reality was back to stay. She tried to find some satisfaction in the knowledge that her long masquerade was over.
Turning to Sonia, Rachel asked, “Mikel will contact my sister, won’t he?”
“You can be sure he will.”
Rachel tried to imagine what it would be like to be reunited with a sister she hadn’t seen in fourteen years. Her guilt at abandoning Victoria had been assuaged by taking care of Eva all these years, but now she wondered if her sister had forgiven her. Her mother, she knew, would have been glad Renee had escaped from the abuse, but she also must have grieved, never knowing what had happened to her other daughter.
Rachel sank down into a chair, laid her arms on the table and dropped her head onto them. Would her mother and her sister ever be able to forgive her?
After a time she felt a warm hand on her shoulder. “You did what you had to at the time,” Sonia said. “No person in this world can do any more than that. I left my family behind in Russia to come to the United States, so I know some of what you must be feeling.”
Rachel lifted her head to look at Sonia, who smiled at her. “Also, whether you want to hear this or not, you haven’t seen the last of my inconsiderate grandson,” Sonia added.
“He’s the last one she needs to ever meet up with again,” Eva insisted.
“No one knows Rachel’s heart except herself,” Sonia told her. “Now, I’ll leave you girls to finish up here so I can work with Aino on his arm exercises before we eat. His leg is now close to normal functioning, but the arm has a ways to go.”
“She’s really something,” Eva said after Sonia left the kitchen. “A takeover person from the get-go.”
“Exactly what your grandfather needed,” Rachel reminded her. “I thought at first they didn’t care for each other because they’re always squabbling, but I finally realized they both enjoy it.”
“It’s not that I don’t like Sonia.” Eva sounded defensive. “It’s just that I left for Finland with Grandpa Aino in good health and you…” Her words trailed off.
“I’ll survive. I always have.”
Eva sighed. “I guess I can’t wish Mikel had never tracked you down because then you might never have been reunited with your family. I can wish, though, that he’d been less of a hunk.”
Her words brought a smile to Rachel’s face. “So you noticed that, did you?”
Shrugging, Eva said, “I am female, after all, no matter what else I might think of him.”
To switch the trend of the conversation to Eva, Rachel said, “Did you meet any Finnish hunks?”
“The one I liked the best was too much the strong, silent type. Like Dad was, only more so. Finns tend to be like that, I guess.” She laughed. “I’m certainly atypical, you can’t shut me up.”
“That’s why you’re so easy to get along with. I always know how you feel.”
“I guess. But I can’t say I always know how you feel. Like now. What happened between you and Mikel?”
I fell in love with him, Rachel admitted to herself. “We were attracted to each other,” she told Eva.
“Too bad.”
Rachel let the word hang between them, knowing she could never explain to Eva—or anyone—just how much Mikel had meant to her.
Mikel’s letter arrived the next day, addressed to Sonia. In it was a note with Victoria Henderson’s phone number, but no other message for Rachel.
Rachel hadn’t really expected one, but it hurt all the same that he hadn’t said goodbye, in person or by mail. With a sigh, she did her best to put her regrets behind her as she picked up the slip with the number on it and headed for the phone.
Chapter Fourteen
On his return home, Mikel checked in with the agency and found the drug kingpin down south had been apprehended, which gave Ed time to run down some additional information for him—details of the unsolved homicide that occurred the night Renee disappeared.
Three days later Ed reported that the unofficial consensus from the police force in that New Jersey town had been that the victim had been killed in a confrontation by his partner, a known drug dealer. With the murder gun missing, though, it could never be proved. Renee’s father, who had no criminal record, had never been implicated, even as a witness.
Still smarting over the lies Rachel had told him, at first Mikel didn’t do anything with this information. When he received a letter from his grandmother a week later, telling him she wasn’t sure when she’d be returning to New York, he scanned it for news of Rachel. There was none.
Finally after a few days had gone by, he decided no matter how he felt about her, the decent thing to do was to call Rachel and let her know her father had never been implicated in the shooting that occurred in the park, that the cops figured the dead man had been killed by his drug-dealer partner. It wasn’t that he wanted to hear her voice, he was just being courteous.
Aino answered the phone and Mikel tried to ignore his pang of disappointment. “Rachel’s not here,” Aino said, sounding surprisingly cordial. “She’s in Nevada.”
Taken aback, Mikel repeated, “Nevada?”
“Yeah. After you sent Victoria’s phone number, Rachel called her and then flew down to Virginia. They went together to visit their mother in Florida and now Rachel’s gone with her sister to some ranch near Reno where Victoria’s husband’s sister lives, if I recollect right.”
“I’ll give you a message for her, then,” Mikel said, and told him what he’d found out about Rachel’s father. “It set me to wondering if Reynaud might have lent the killer his gun. When he saw the armed killer heading for his daughter, he might well have tried to head him off, they collided, and that’s when the gun was dropped. Reynaud could actually have been trying to protect the two girls.”
“Possible, I’d say. I’ll let her know. Your grandma’s pestering me to give her the phone, so I better.”
“Mikel?” Grandma Sonia said.
“I can’t deny it. How are you getting along?”
“Very well. The Upper Peninsula has proved so beneficial for my allergies I may decide not to return to New York.”
Mikel smiled. Her allergies. What she meant was she didn’t want to leave Aino.
“I can tell what you’re thinking,” she continued, “but that’s my business. As for you, if you had the sense you were born with, you’d know what to do about yours. Why do you keep telling yourself words are truth or lies when the only real truth lives in the heart?”
After he said goodbye, Mikel wandered to the window of his apartment and stared morosely out at the rain. Why did it seem to rain wherever he went? He still had almost a week of vacation left and there wasn’t one damn thing he cared to do with the time. His grandmother’s words buzzed in his head like a pesky fly he couldn’t swat. What in hell did she expect of him? He was the victim, not the betrayer.
When the phone rang he all but snarled into it.
“What’s bugging you,
man?” Steve asked from the other end.
“Sorry. Lousy mood, that’s all. What’s up?”
“You soon will be. I got reservations for you, so get your butt on that plane to Reno. I’ll pick you up there. You’ll be staying with us at my brother-in-law’s ranch. No argument. Here’s the schedule.” Steve rattled off the airline, flight number and time. “Go pack,” he ordered before cutting the connection.
Not until he boarded the jet at Dulles did Mikel realize why he was obeying Steve without question. Since this wasn’t an agency case, with Steve the senior special agent, that had nothing to do with it. And he wasn’t on this flight as a favor to Steve just because they were good buddies. He was flying to Nevada because that’s where Rachel was, and regardless of what had happened, he desperately wanted to see her one last time.
He was lucky enough not to be seated next to anyone who wanted to talk, because he was in no frame of mind for idle conversation. On the other hand, that left him a victim of his own thoughts and he didn’t much care for those. Why had he insisted on equating Rachel with Yolanda?
Okay, she’d lied to him. But were her lies intended to harm him the way Yolanda’s had been? His failure to suspect that Yolanda might have a tie-in to the illegal arms-shipping syndicate had nearly cost both Steve’s life and his. Rachel’s lies, though, hadn’t been meant to harm, they’d been to protect herself and the Saaris, the people who’d rescued her, who’d sheltered her. Yolanda had truly betrayed him, Rachel had not. Except in his own mind.
By the time the plane set down in Reno, he was ashamed of his behavior. Aino had called him misguided, Grandma Sonia had called him stubborn and closemouthed. They were right on all counts. Now, what the hell was he going to say to Rachel when they came face-to-face? She might refuse to even speak to him, and he could hardly blame her.
Steve hustled him through the airport and out to a red Jaguar. “One of Talal’s,” he said. “You remember him—my other brother-in-law. We’re staying at Zed’s.”
Mikel nodded, having sorted out Steve’s identical twin brothers-in-law, Talal and Zed, at Steve and Victoria’s wedding.
Steve maneuvered the car from the parking area and onto the freeway before he said, “Since you’re not asking why I shanghaied you out here, you must have some idea.”
Being with Steve lifted Mikel’s spirits some. “Your wish is my command,” he said.
“How about those famous hunches of yours?”
“Left ’em home.”
Steve shot him a look. “Come on, man.”
“I know why I came,” Mikel admitted.
“’Cause you done her wrong, right? Victoria said you’d figure that out sooner or later. She wasn’t willing to wait for later, so here you are in beautiful northern Nevada, with the sun going down behind the Sierras.”
“It was raining when I left Dulles—Reno’s an improvement. What’s Victoria expect me to do?”
Steve shrugged. “Who knows? But you’re just in time for one of Zed’s famous barbecues tomorrow. Anything can happen.”
Mikel looked at him. “What do you mean?”
“You won’t know till it hits you. I sure didn’t.”
“Sounds ominous.”
“Nevadans prefer direct action to being subtle.”
Raising an eyebrow, Mikel said, “You mean I might get hanged for my sins?”
Steve grinned. “Worse than that—far worse.”
Whatever Steve was referring to didn’t bother Mikel. What did worry him was meeting Rachel again. To take his mind off that, he concentrated on the scenery, noticing that only a small patch of snow remained atop Mount Rose. Then they entered the open valley where the calm waters of Washoe Lake caught the last pink glow of the alpine-glow sunset. Northern Nevada always surprised him with its diverse beauty.
“Saying your prayers?” Steve’s voice was amused.
“Trying to decide the best way to eat crow,” Mikel admitted.
“You can never pretty it up enough so it tastes like anything else, so you might as well take it straight.”
“Is she all right?”
“If you mean Victoria, she’s fine and you’re her current hero. Heidi’s growing so fast she changes daily. Rachel seems kind of dazed since she got here. No wonder, being confronted with this extended family Victoria and I are tangled up with is enough to confuse anyone. Interesting she decided to stay with the name Rachel rather than going back to Renee.”
“Yeah.” If he ever talked to anyone about his relationship with Rachel, Steve would be that person, but Mikel couldn’t bring himself to discuss any part of it. Instead, he told Steve what Ed had gotten from the New Jersey cops and laid out his theory about Reynaud, ending with, “I’m not saying he wasn’t a bastard, because he was. When push came to shove, though, I have a hunch he tried to protect his daughter.”
“I can see he might have.”
After a time, Mikel said, “I take it there’ll be a mob at the ranch for the barbecue.”
“What else? Almost everyone is a relative in some way or other. You met most of them at our wedding.”
“Don’t expect me to sort them all out.”
“Doesn’t matter. There are a couple new ones. Doc Walker’s sister, Laura, married a guy named Shane Bearclaw. And I know there must be a baby or two more since then. It’s Victoria’s job to keep track of whose they are and their names—I lose track.”
The car nosed over the last hill and the lights of Carson City spread out below them. If Mikel remembered correctly, it was another twenty or so miles to Zed’s ranch in Carson Valley. In a half hour, give or take a few minutes, he’d be face-to-face with Rachel. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. As Sonia had pointed out, truth isn’t necessarily in words—yet words were all he had to offer Rachel.
How different she’d looked without those brown contacts. The true color of her eyes was almost golden, beautiful, but different. It would take getting used to.
Not that he’d be around that long. Apology didn’t come easy to him, but he’d get it done and get out. Fast.
“With that crowd, nobody’ll miss me if I’m not at the barbecue,” he told Steve.
Steve glanced at him. “What’re you crazy? It’s being held in your honor.”
Mikel realized he was trapped. “My grandmother should be here in my place,” he muttered. “She knew who Rachel was before I did. Caught the resemblance to Victoria in that photo you sent me.”
“How is your grandmother?” Steve asked.
“Fighting with a Finn who enjoys the arguing as much as she does. He’s Aino Saari, the father of the man who rescued Renee, accounting for her disappearance.”
“Sounds serious.”
Mikel nodded morosely. He didn’t begrudge Aino and Sonia happiness, but he sure as hell was far from happy. Who could be in his shoes? Especially since he’d come to realize no one but himself was responsible for his unenviable position.
“We wanted to bring Victoria and Rachel’s mother with us to Nevada,” Steve said, “but she’s afraid of flying. When Rachel and Victoria went to see her in Florida, their mother said that now all her prayers had been answered, but they both got the impression she seemed relieved when they left.”
“Doesn’t want her routine disrupted,” Mikel said. “I got that impression when I talked to her before I drove to Michigan.”
After a time Steve said, “Here we are,” and turned the car into a winding driveway, pulling up and parking near the ranch house. Mikel collected his bag and followed him to the back door.
“Why is it everyone always comes in through the back door when my kitchen is a mess?” Steve’s sister Karen complained before she hugged Mikel. “You look in dire need of sustenance,” she said. “Ham sandwich? Coffee?”
“Later,” Steve told her. “What he needs right now isn’t food.”
Karen nodded. “Try the solarium. I think Victoria and Rachel are admiring my lemon tree—it actually has five lemons on it.”
Steve led the way. When they reached the addition and stepped into the long room with one outside glass wall, at first Mikel saw only Victoria. Then she moved toward Steve, revealing Rachel, who’d been behind her. For a moment, Mikel forgot to breathe, unable to move or speak. He couldn’t look away from her, from those unfamiliar tawny eyes in that face he knew so well.
“Your hair is still black,” he said inanely, the first words he could manage to get out.
“Yes, I had it cut, but it’ll take time to grow in red again.” Rachel wondered at the calmness of her voice when her heart was thudding wildly in her chest. She wanted to look away from his green gaze, but could not.
At last he broke the contact when he glanced around. She did, too, and saw Steve and Victoria had wandered away.
“I should have said hello and how are you,” Mikel told her, not moving any closer, for which she was grateful.
She returned his hello and added, “I’m finding Nevada interesting.”
“Yes, it is.”
Rachel searched for something more to say, uncomfortable with the awkwardness between them. “You’ve been here before, I understand.”
He nodded.
After a silence that went on far too long, Rachel said, “Aino called me. He told me what you’d found out about my father. I want to thank you for making me realize he might not have been the monster I always believed he was. It’s lifted a weight from my mind.”
“That’s good.” Mikel cleared his throat. “I shouldn’t have accused you of lying, especially since I lied by omission myself. I tend to be secretive, it’s a carryover from my job. There was no reason why I shouldn’t have told you your sister was the one trying to find you. If I had, none of the misunderstandings would have taken place.”
He was actually apologizing! “I could have asked,” she admitted, with a tentative smile.
Mikel smiled, too.
They still stood several feet apart and Rachel could feel how taut her muscles were. Part of her wanted to reach out to him, but she did not. Yes, he’d apologized, but he didn’t seem like the Mikel she knew. Or thought she knew.