I reached for Torin. “Get a select group of soldiers and as many supplies as you can to last a few weeks at least. It may be months.”
“It will be done, my lady.” He nodded and moved out, heeding my orders. Stavros would start to tighten the rope around my citadel, cutting off supplies and trade.
I held my head high all the way back to the castle, feeling the strength of my friends behind me. I knew I could count on each one of them, but in that moment, I felt utterly alone.
Every decision I made would take or save lives.
If one of them fell, it would destroy me but might not affect the outcome of the war.
If I fell, the kingdom collapsed.
Voices banged against each other in the room packed with chaos and tension.
“Hey!” Ember yelled, trying to get the room’s attention. “Everyone, shut up!” Questions and opinions choked each other out. It was not surprising in a room full of alphas.
A piercing whistle sounded through the room, slamming mouths closed.
“Shut the fuck up!” Gabby pulled her fingers from her mouth, nodding at me. “Go ahead, nerd.”
“Thanks.” I let a brief laugh slide over my tongue. I found it comforting when Gabby called me nerd. Like I could go back to the time I was just a girl, asking her for sex advice. Times weren’t simple then, but in contrast to now, they felt like it.
“We have a lot of fights on many sides.” I leaned back against the table. Everyone had followed me straight back to the library. It was starting to feel close to a war room.
A spike of sorrow, the memory of Wizard and his war room tugged at my heart. He was my true friend from the DLR. I missed him. I actually missed a lot of the group from the Druid Liberal Republic.
Which gave me an idea.
“Fionna.” My thoughts sidetracked. “Do you still stay in contact with the DRL?”
“No, I was kind of locked up.” She folded her arms, watching me intently as if she understood where my mind was headed. “But if they are still around, I can get a message to them.”
A thin smile tugged up my mouth. “Good. We’re going to need every hand on deck.”
“Unfortunately, both Wizard and Kenya are dead.”
“I know.” I frowned. “Does anyone know a hacker? Or someone really good at computers?”
“Garrett,” a deep voice said from the door. Everyone in the room swung around to see Goran standing in the doorway. “He’s the best.”
“Goran, you should be resting.” Right away I felt something off about him. His aura was a dull gray without sparks of emotion or life. Like he was a zombie or something. I had never seen anything like it. His mouth moved, but lifelessness blanketed his features.
“Garrett?” Ryker sputtered from the corner. “Short little Irish fucker? He’s still alive?”
“Yes. He has been a great asset to Lars.” Goran grunted in pain as he took a step deeper into the room. “Stavros doesn’t know what he does and how good he is yet. It will only be a matter of time. The last I saw, he was locked up in one of the dungeons with Cadoc.”
Ryker scoffed, shaking his head. “That asshole is still with him, huh?” It was clear he knew these two men. The life of fae was long, and if you were any kind of player in it, you eventually crossed paths with others you’d known before.
“Nic and Piper are there too.” Fionna’s meaningful gaze met mine.
“My powers are also there.” Rez stepped up to Ember. “Did you hear him? He said troops were coming over land and sea. If he has troops sailing to us, then you will need me.”
“And me.” Croygen added himself to the semicircle around me. “I am a pirate, after all.”
“I thought you were a tradesman?” Zoey joined him, bumping his shoulder.
“For this,” he lifted an eyebrow, “I’m all pirate, baby.”
“You’re a banana-munching swashdickler,” Sprig said from Zoey’s shoulder. “And since we’re talking about it, who’s hungry? Do you have honey cake here?”
“We weren’t talking about food, goat lover,” Croygen sniped back.
“Well, we should be. Everyone is so grumpy.”
“Here, here!” Cal fluttered from Ember’s shoulder to join the monkey. “Crackling crackers, everyone is so uptight. The gods blessed us with the sweet berries for a reason.”
“Honey.” Sprig all but drooled. “You talking about honey? ’Cause I can eat it on a berry. Mangos are good. Raspberries…oohh, honey apples. But pancakes are best. Have you tried churros? So good.”
“Sure, honey… But what if you dip those in juniper juice? Even better!”
“Better than honey? How dare you! Nothing is better.”
“Oh, little furball, you have not dipped yourself in a sink full of juniper juice yet.”
“Why do I see this going really bad?” Eli rubbed his head.
“But oh so funny.” West rubbed his hands together.
“Can we return to the battle, please?” They all snapped back to me. “Rez, do you think you could get more sirens to join you?”
Her mouth pushed together, her gaze going to her feet. “Yeah. I might be able to get my mother’s colony.”
Croygen’s head jerked to her, then away.
“I won’t deny she will probably try to kill you,” Rez scoffed looking directly at Croygen.
“Yay for me.” Croygen’s Adam’s apple bobbed sharply with his swallow.
“But first we break into the compound.” I massaged my temples. Were we really thinking about doing this? “Retrieve Piper, Nic, Garrett, and Rez’s powers. And anyone else we can get who is loyal to Lars.”
“Sure. That sounds easy enough,” Ember scoffed, dropping her hands.
We hadn’t even started on what we were going to do about the stone or how to get Lars back. Right now we had to deal with one thing at a time. Rescuing Piper was most important to me. If Stavros didn’t have her to threaten us, it would make things a tad bit easier. We were still up against a wall, but those fighting for Lars understood what could happen. They’d chosen that life; the little girl had not.
“I promise, Zoey, we will deal with breaking your link to the stone as soon as we can.” I pushed my glasses up.
After a beat, she bobbed her head. “I know. This comes first. If it was Wyatt or my sisters…” She took a breath. “You get us through the protected barrier and Ryker and I will get you in and out of the compound.”
“We’ll need a distraction.” Cole pushed off the wall coming forward. “To pull focus, while a group of you goes in.” A proud smile split his mouth. “My family does nothing better than cause chaos.”
“Damn right.” Cooper and Gabby high-fived each other.
“Okay.” A strange relief washed over me. Maybe because it was actually a plan. Even a dumb one. “We’re doing this. So Goran, Rez. You two know the castle best. I’ll have Olivia bring you plans of the compound and house. I need you guys to show us every entrance and exit. Find the most guarded areas and the least. Anything you think we will need.” They both nodded in agreement.
“Dwellers, if you are going to cause a stir, I need it to be good. And time consuming.”
“Don’t ever doubt the trouble we can create.” Lorcan winked at me.
I didn’t.
“Fionna, Ember, Rez, Zoey, Ryker, Croygen, Goran, and I will go in.”
“Don’t forget me. I have magic fingers.” Sprig wiggled his hands.
Eli snorted.
“And us, my lady.” Simmons buzzed around Ember. “You will need us.”
“You mean to fall asleep and be taken by the enemy again?” Eli mocked.
Simmons’s mouth dropped open. “I will have you know, sir, I was never taken by the old Queen’s men. Nor did I fall asleep. I fought by Sir Torin’s side. By my lady’s.”
“Cool your britches, Simmons; he’s talking about me.” Cal landed on Ember’s shoulder, crossing his arms. “And if I must sacrifice and be put into a coma by juniper powder, then I
will do it. For the team. I’m a team player.”
“Thank you, Cal,” Ember said, grinning evilly at Eli. “Your heroism knows no bounds.”
Cal stuck out his tongue at dark dweller. “Watch it, dweller. I’ve got a whole new sheet of glittery dick stickers.”
I walked over to a call button on the desk I used when I was in here. “Olivia, can you bring me plans of Lars’s compound? And coffee. Lots of it.” I let go and then pushed the button again. “Oh and bring honey.”
“I like her.” Sprig rose up on his legs. “Honey tits for all the kingdom!”
After five hours of planning and then arguing about the plan, I called it a night. We were exhausted and going around in circles.
I’d had a quick shower to wash off Rimmon’s blood, but I still felt dirty, coated with the grime of Stavros. The terror he was already causing was overwhelming. I was so far out of my element, terrified that whatever choice I made, it could be the wrong one. One that would kill those around me.
“Hey, li’l bird.” Lorcan’s body pressed against my back. Brushing my hair off my shoulder, he pressed his lips to my neck. “You okay?”
A grim laugh stumbled from my chest. Was I okay? No. Not really.
“You were amazing today.” He towed me in closer, his lips moving across my shoulder blade.
“I’m holding on by my fingertips.” I touched my forehead. “I have no clue what I’m doing. And any choice I make could end lives.”
He was quiet, his mouth trying to comfort me ways words couldn’t.
“I feel so alone,” I confessed.
“You aren’t. You have us. And I will be at your side every moment.”
Frustration built up in me, and I pushed away from him. “But your decisions don’t possibly get thousands murdered.” I swung around, weariness from the day spiraling through me. “I can’t do this alone. I need Lars. And he’s one of the forces I have to fight. How can I do this?” I held out my arm waving outside my patio doors. “I am everything Stavros said. Inexperienced, weak, scared…”
“You are not weak.”
“Tell that to the hundred or so who walked away to join him. Who mistrust and hate me so much they will jump to any other side but mine.”
“They are weak, not you. They need someone to tell them what to do and believe.”
“It doesn’t matter,” I exclaimed. “My own people think I’m not worth following. They question if they should be standing beside me. Don’t you think there will be more who have left by morning?”
Lorcan rubbed his nose, exhaling, staring at the floor. “I feel there is nothing I can say without you skewing it.”
Weight pressed down my shoulders. I turned to face the windows, staring over the lake, which was hidden by the night.
“I can’t do this.”
“Yes. You can, li’l bird.” He moved behind me again, his arms wrapping around my waist. “And you will. We all will. There is no other choice. I will be here every step.”
His attempt at comfort was nice, but it felt like a bandage. No matter whether Lorcan walked next to me or not, the burden fell on me. Being Queen at twenty-three came with a heavy crown.
I didn’t realize how much I had depended on Lars as a mentor and a friend. It felt wrong without him. And the loss of him wouldn’t only affect me. What would happen when others around the world learned he was gone? So many who supported me did so because of Lars. Without him? How many would turn on me? Run to the new King?
Stavros might be full of lies, but he spoke with conviction, strength, and power. Even if people didn’t know why they were following him, they would do it anyway, caught up in the certainty of his speeches. The rhetoric of fae compared to human was potent.
The visions I had were more feelings than images, but I knew death and war were coming, a fight for Lars and our kingdom. I didn’t know if we would win.
Most people could focus on one step at a time, but I had to look at the whole picture. Try to perceive future situations and how to handle each outcome. See the big picture, the future, and plan for it. Pain thumped through my head around the knots tied up there.
“You can’t do anything more tonight,” Lorcan murmured in my ear, his breath gliding down the back of my neck. “You need to rest.”
“I can’t sleep.” I was exhausted, but my mind swirled with plans and lists.
“Let me handle that.” He laced his hand with mine, tugging me toward the bed. My feet followed him, wanting to disappear beneath his body, to pretend for one moment I wasn’t Queen, and that horror and devastation weren’t awaiting me.
Lorcan laid me back on the bed, stripping my clothes and removing all barriers between us. His tongue and mouth evaporated all thought except the pleasure he brought. When he thrust into me, with our bodies moving together and our moans piercing the air, nothing existed in the room except us.
But outside the door, I could feel it waiting.
My crown drenched with blood.
Chapter 10
Fionna
Metal objects littered the floor around me. Empty. Cold. Useless.
My fingers wrapped around the smooth edges of the cauldron, trying to feel a pulse. Anything. Only a hollow ring echoed back. My hands squeezed the black metal till my bones moaned with the pressure.
Shite.
The one thing we needed was obsolete because of me. Because Lars couldn’t let me go. My fate had been to die, to sacrifice for the greater good. I had been ready. Lars made the ultimate sacrifice, for love. The exact thing which saved my life destroyed all hope for him.
Greedily and mercilessly, the stone claimed the man I loved. I wasn’t someone who had believed in love. I didn’t have starry-eyed dreams of someone saving me or true love conquering all. That wasn’t me. I saved myself. And I certainly didn’t need love. Especially with a fae. A demon.
A King.
Not with someone I had spent years hating and plotting to kill. Yet here I was, my heart cracking over the floor like a broken egg. My soul ached as if it lost a piece of itself.
Then there was Piper. My heart and thoughts had to shut down at the idea of what she must be enduring; the pain and dread so deep, I could barely move. My baby girl. I’d failed her again. My worst fear had happened.
With a grunt, I shoved black magic at the cauldron, my lids squeezing shut, discomfort stabbing me like darts. Desperate, I would try anything, do anything, to get her back.
My energy slammed against the cauldron, akin to running into a cement wall. The bounce shoved me backward, my arse landing on the hard stone floor.
“Fuck.” Tears blistered behind my lids, my anger flaring. I crawled back, fury shoving more magic through my words, grabbing the cauldron. “Come back you frickin’ piece of shite!”
My body skidded and rolled back into the wall with a harsh thud.
Our family had made this damn thing. I would bring it back. I had to.
Scuttling back to it, I cried out in frustration, seized the pot, and dug my words into it through gritted teeth.
“Fionna.” My sister’s voice drifted from behind me, her body crashing next to me. “Stop!” She covered my hands with hers, trying to pry them off.
“No.” I tried to push her away with an elbow, but she wiggled around, still trying to remove my hands.
“Black magic isn’t going to help bring this back.”
“How do you know?” I barked.
“Because.” Her fingers moved from my hands to my face. She forced me to look at her. “It wasn’t made from black magic.”
“So? I can bring people back from the dead. Why not this?” I tried to wriggle out of her grip, but she grabbed my face tighter. “I’ve done it before. I’ll do it again.”
She dropped her arms, her body leaning back. “You’ve brought someone back from the dead? Are you serious?” Her soft brown eyes were wide with shock and fear.
A wash of shame turned my crumpled brow toward the floor.
“Fionna?”
Silence.
“Look at me.” Kennedy’s voice tightened. “Tell me you are not serious.”
Rolling back my shoulders, I looked at her defiantly. “I did.”
“Oh gods...” Her eyes widened. “Goran.”
“How did you know?”
“His aura. It’s gray. Not one bit of life or emotion.” She shook her head. “Like he was the walking dead.”
“I had to.” A reflex defense popped from my mouth.
“No. You didn’t. Do you understand what you are playing with? Death is the one thing no one should tamper with. You do not mess with the laws of death. You know that!”
I felt like a child being reprimanded. I did know. But it hadn’t stopped me in the moment. “Don’t tell me if you could go back in time, you wouldn’t have saved your little boyfriend,” I snapped.
She jerked back, anguish flooding her eyes.
Immediately, I felt awful. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that.”
“You don’t think I don’t relive that moment every day?” Her lips pressed together, holding back her anger. “That I don’t wonder if I could have tried to save him instead of standing there watching him die? I’ve spent countless nights imagining bringing him back from the dead.”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
“No, you don’t know.” Her eyes flamed. “It’s been two years, and there isn’t a day I don’t think of him, of what I could have done differently. It haunts me. Along with my family and all the other people who died. You do not understand for a moment what I’ve been through.”
Shite. Leave it to a sister to cause you to feel like a wee thing. “You’re right, I don’t.” My shoulders sagged, the anger dissipating. “And I’m sorry you carry so much on your shoulders. So much pain and responsibility.”
We both stayed quiet for a few minutes, as though reliving the painful reality of what we had gone through and what we were about to do.
Rise From The Embers (Lightness Saga Book 4) Page 11