Oculus

by S. E. Akers

  Tanner finally lifted up his head and then rose to his feet. The confusion that crossed his brow had me biting my lip. “If you needed money . . . if you needed anything, why didn’t you come to me?”

  “It wasn’t your problem,” I replied.

  “Any problem of yours is my problem,” he assured. “If something is troubling you, it troubles me.”

  “I didn’t tell Bea either,” I said. “The two of you had done so much for me. I didn’t want to be any more of a burden.”

  The haze clouding his eyes peeled away, revealing a wounded glare. “That’s ridiculous. You could never be a burden,” he assured. “Not to me.”

  “I talked to Samuel,” I added, angling for encouraging. “He’s going to find out who bought them.”

  Tanner’s grin looked far more somber than rosy. “There’s a fine line between optimism and wishful thinking. I think we both know what the fruits of his search will produce.”

  I could feel my eyes starting to well, knowing his reasoning was without an ounce of fault.

  “Look,” Tanner said as he led me over to the chaise. “What’s done is done. You can’t unscramble this egg. You just have to make sure that this is the only time it lands on your face.”

  “Don’t you mean my neck?” I countered.

  The wry stare he initially shot had me regretting my joke until the hint of a grin tugged at his lips.

  “I promise I won’t ever do that again,” I vowed.

  “I suspect you won’t have a reason to,” he remarked and then waved Silas into the room. “Not the same one, at least.”

  “Here you are, Professor,” Silas announced and handed him a large accordion folder. “This is everything you asked for.”

  Tanner nodded to Silas. “That will be all.” He waited until the house steward had left the room and then turned to me immediately. “I should have done this sooner . . . though the timing wouldn’t have made a difference.” A confident gleam sparked in his eyes. “But it will prevent a situation like this from happening again.”

  “Is that where you keep your rolls of tin,” I asked, half-kidding.

  His mouth stretched wider with every shake of his head. Tanner handed me the folder. “Open it,” he urged.

  I untied the cord and watched the bulky sleeve fan apart in my lap. A parchment scroll lay on top, covering the rest of the pages tucked inside. Naturally I reached for it first. I unrolled the parchment and stared blankly at the words, unable to read past its heading.

  I held it out to Tanner, struggling to speak. “Wh—”

  “Shiloh, Beatrix didn’t just leave you her supernatural possessions . . . She left you all of her money and holdings as well.” Tanner pulled a brown leather portfolio out of the folder. He propped it open, positioning it in front of me. His finger led my eyes down the page to a figure highlighted at the bottom. “That’s how much she left you.”

  I stared at the sequence of numbers in a daze. This unexpected turn of events couldn’t have felt any more surreal, not even if the ink forming the letters suddenly started dripping off the paper.

  “That’s your net worth from all of her bank accounts, properties, and investments,” he explained, “as well as her company.”

  “Company?” I questioned.

  Tanner pulled out a bound stack of papers. I recognized the trademark immediately.

  Suddenly a memory burst forth from my subconscious. I remembered seeing Officer Ryan guzzling down this brand of diet shakes trying to counter his freakish weight gain, courtesy of one ticked-off former Golden Topaz Talisman. The sneakiest of suspicions emerged. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind as to “whom” had thoughtfully made sure their own special “anti-blend” was dropped off on his doorstep, probably tied in a shiny gold bow.

  “That’s her company,” I acknowledged, having seen their ads boasting their speedy results. Now there was one product guarantee I could believe — if you hadn’t pissed the old bird off.

  “It was,” Tanner replied. “Now it’s yours.”

  I placed the papers back inside the folder, needing a breather. This all felt so awkward. In the doghouse one minute and then having my butt dropped on the doorsteps of a mansion? I didn’t deserve this, not after what I’d done. Now I needed some form of punishment more than ever to alleviate the mound of guilt I’d amassed before it buried me alive.

  Tanner placed the folder on the side table. “You look rather ill for someone who’s just struck it rich.”

  “It’s weird,” I said. “I feel so undeserving . . . kind of like when I claimed the diamond. I guess it boils down to what it always does — ‘why me’?” I knew what was going to come out of his mouth when I saw it open. “Please don’t say Fate,” I interrupted, cringing at having to acknowledge the other F-word myself. “If fate wanted me to have all this, there wouldn’t be a monster left in the dungeon, and I wouldn’t be screwing up so much.”

  “Do you think everything came to Adamas so easily?”

  “Yes,” I said. And I’d witnessed the no-mercy warrior’s prowess for the past couple weeks first-hand.

  “What about me?” Tanner posed.

  “I can’t imagine finding failure in your dossier either,” I confessed.

  Tanner averted his stare. “Everyone makes mistakes, Shiloh,” he assured, “and everyone, including Adamas and myself, struggles with fear. You can’t achieve true bravery without it.” Tanner collected the gauze off the table. “Now, turn around and let me patch that wound.”

  I did as he requested, thankful that it offered me a break from his shrewd gaze. I knew he genuinely meant what he’d said, but from my vantage, the sum of his words seemed far more like fiction than fact. I couldn’t even fathom Kamya having a shred of fear.

  Maybe between her teeth after she’d chewed it up… And then she’d just floss it out with a crack of her whip.

  “All done,” Tanner announced and then guided me up to my feet. “You need to get in bed and rest.”

  “I can do it,” I insisted, not wanting him too close to my bed. I didn’t think I could stomach another confession seeing how I was still wrestling with the guilt I presently had. But I was planning on telling him about the dreamcatcher and the visions soon — if Silas hadn’t already beat me to it. The telepathic house steward had to have told him my reason for why I’d sold those diamonds right after he’d left. Why else would Tanner have made him bring Bea’s will down here to nix any further ideas of diamond-financing. He already knew my motives. He just wanted to hear them for himself.

  I’d no sooner crawled into my bed and pulled up the covers when Silas rapped on the door. Tanner walked over to open it immediately. The house steward entered the room holding a tiny crystal glass in his hand. He handed it to me with a grin. “Here you are, Ms. Wallace.”

  Curiously, I held it up to my nose for an inspection. I recognized the liquid’s cinnamon-like scent and pale green color from one my “alchemy” lessons.

  “Embervale?” I questioned, trying to hide the alarm mounting inside me. I was going to have a rough enough time running down for more black tourmalines to tie on my dreamcatcher in my wounded state as it was, but I sure couldn’t do it after chugging an elixir that put you in a stiff-as-a-board temporary coma. “Is knocking me out necessary?”

  “That wound has to heal from the inside out,” Tanner called from the doorway. “The less you move, the quicker your road to recovery.”

  I forced as much of a grin as my nerves would allow. “Of course,” I muttered, eyeing the contents of the glass. Judging from the amount, I was looking at roughly a full day with no means of waking. I didn’t know how much bad crap a black tourmaline could hold, and I only had one left.

  Silas was quick to point out my stall. “Why, Ms. Wallace,” he whispered telepathically. “You should be embracing this break. You’re acting as if you have something pressing hanging over your head.”

  My pissy-pride wouldn’t hear of asking him to add one thing to that daggone web.
I threw back the embervale with a quick and heated swig.

  Silas directed his mossy-green eyes to the dreamcatcher dangling from above with a smug roll. “Don’t let the beg-bugs bite,” he cooed.

  Well now I was just galled as all get-out. I quickly flipped onto my belly, the only tolerable position considering my wound. My lids fluttered to a close and I was out like a light before I could pop off my first mental curse. Hopefully my need for a face-to-face tirade would be enough of an incentive for me to make it back from diamond-dreamland alive.

  It wasn’t long before I realized the cosmos had yet again stamped my hand with another one of its all-access passes, buckled me in, and sent me coasting off to The Darklands. I’d figured as much, but I wasn’t exactly sure how long this tour would last. I was guessing I’d been issued an extended “after-hours” ticket, courtesy of karma. Time wasn’t something you couldn’t accurately gauge within the borders of this realm. The hands of my watch remained at their usual standstill, there was no sun hanging above to use as a guide, and I was far too busy watching Adamas and making sure my hide remained invisible to even think about counting to ten, let alone a full sixty-seconds. And I had more than a sneaky suspicion that my hands were going to be extra-full this time around. Silas’ nail-biting remark about the tourmalines had set the tone of that quandary. I was really hoping those things filled and stretched like a kitchen trash bag—one of those big one-size-fits-all black babies, the kind you could jam-pack everything in—because if they didn’t, my comatose keister was in for a seriously rough ride.

  I could tell I’d been stuck here a lot longer than any of my previous visits from the number of bouts I witnessed. At my last count, Adams the Great had annihilated seventy-three different creatures—all of them powerful, savage, and physically repulsive in their own distinct way—which proved that there was never a dull moment in Death’s backyard. Some of the more hideous beasts got me to thinking about what sort of wicked act had magically spawned such vicious, freakish-looking beings. One particularly vile humanoid creature had the stalk and sinister eyes of a serial killer, so I was going with that one with respect to its creation. Though despite how disturbed I was by all the creatures I witnessed, I managed to impress myself after recognizing a few of them from my lessons. Of course that brought forth another unnerving realization. In order for these things to be “documented” in the first place, they had to have spent a little time on the “other side”. Being attacked by the Onyx was scary enough as a child, but if I’d known these monsters existed, I would have nailed my closet door shut and dropped the mattress on my bed clear down to the floor. Without a doubt, reading about them in a library or seeing them painted on a panel didn’t come close to watching them roam around in the flesh. But to my good fortune, I remained safely undetected by nary a one of the savage-souls I’d laid eyes on throughout Adamas’ tireless parade of battles, thankfully. So maybe tourmalines did bend like a Hefty bag after all?

  In the wake of laying waste to a ferocious gang of reptilian creatures whose scales jutted out like daggers and mouths boasted three rows of saw-toothed fangs, Adamas weaved a path through the withered forest and tromped a heated course straight for a rocky canyon. Then after several twists and turns through its narrow ravines, he finally came to a stop at the opening of a mammoth cave. He peered into it with a sense of familiarity, like he’d been here several times before. I figured this might be the place the warrior came whenever he needed to get some rest. Then again, I’d never seen him lay down his sword any of the times I’d been here, so that was probably more wishful thinking on my part. That was another thing that whispered to me how long I’d been here. I wasn’t a “stay up all-night” kind of girl. I needed at least six of those twenty-four hours designated for restful Zzzs every day. My body may have been sleeping soundly on the other-side, but here in the astral / beyond-The-Veil / metaphysical what-have-you realm, Adamas couldn’t park his blade fast enough right now. So I was a little cranky.

  I squatted on the ground for a moment, right in front of him too, waiting for him to end his indecision. Are we going in or staying out, I groaned over and over to myself. The longer I watched Adamas, the more certain I was that he’d sensed something. However at no time did the warrior’s sandals venture a shuffle one step closer to its mouth. I rose to my feet and looked into the cave critically. I didn’t hear any sounds, nor detect the slightest movement stirring within its shadows. It seemed as still in there as it did out here. I turned back to study Adamas’ stance. He appeared as formidable as ever, though something was different about him. Then I realized what it was: the white flashes of light swirling his eyes seemed paler, more cautious in a way.

  The next thing I knew, the howls of another beast off in the distance had him abandoning his position and trekking off on another hunt. I didn’t follow him straightaway, not with my curiosity keeping me rooted in place. Cautiously, I stepped towards the sweeping circle of shadows and then counted off a full thirty-seconds. I still didn’t sense anything. Maybe it was actually empty?

  I started to turn when two glowing eyes suddenly appeared within the blackness… And then another pair… And then followed by one more matching set — all of them bearing the same putrid yellow hue. The eerie peepers emerged from the shadows at the same time, each pair comprising their own part of the same three-headed creature I was already painfully acquainted with. The chimera now stood merely a few yards from my frightened frame. An uncanny sensation washed over me like I was free-falling from a building, and the feeling intensified the longer I focused on the track of its eyes. They were looking dead at me—all six of them were—cognizant of my every breath. That, my bottomed-out gut knew for certain. Suddenly all those wishful thoughts about the capacity of black tourmalines had me feeling like a thieving raccoon had just knocked over my trash can and ripped a hole clear through my bag. Crap.

  I took off running as soon as its lion-head roared out a wicked streak of flames, barely dodging its heat. I glanced back to confirm that the creature was following me, which sent my nails driving down into my skin in a failed attempt to wake my comatose butt up. I didn’t think it would work, but I had to check just to be sure. The chimera soared above the narrow ravine, keeping me well within its sights. It knew I had nowhere else to go within the towering maze of rocks. There weren’t any smaller caves to duck into and several wrong turns had caused me to lose my bearings. And I certainly wasn’t stupid enough to try climbing out of here. I was basically a trapped mouse, scrambling to find its way out of a hellish stone labyrinth and praying the cosmos would steer me towards some life-saving cheese.

  I stopped in my tracks when I saw my path dead-ending up ahead. The chimera was swooping down, targeting me for its first strike when I turned. I whirled around and swept the scene. There was nothing I could use to shield myself from the creature, which sent me into even more of a panic. Though judging from the speed of its descent, I wouldn’t be worrying about anything for much longer, especially not things like “what happens when you die in a dream”. That previous concern was coming to a rest all too soon.

  My helpless situation had me hunkering down on the ground, arms over my head and locked in a tight flinch, like a three-headed F-22 fighter jet was about to lay some serious hate my way. Then abruptly the ground rocked with a quake, pulling my muscles out of their hold and shooting me straight to my feet. The chimera had landed and was storming around in an angry fit—roaring, snorting, and hissing—searching every which way like it couldn’t see me. And I was close by too, merely a few feet to its left. None of its fine-tuned sensed were picking up any traces of my scent either, miraculously. I dropped straight to my knees I’d breathed such a deep sigh of relief, knowing I’d been spared only by the skin of my teeth. And to be quite honest, I didn’t know for certain what had happened or how I’d scored my reprieve. But I wasn’t thumbing my nose at whatever had saved me from getting ripped and roasted, even if my suspicions were true, and it had come at the hands o
f one smart-mouthed house steward pitching a few stones my way. After surviving such a horrifying close-call, he could consider my pride officially shelved.

  Regardless of how invisible I was now, I got the heck out of there and ran off to find Adamas — just like a scared little girl. With or without my pride, I was a big enough woman to admit it.

  It wasn’t long after that when the diamond returned me unscathed back to the land of the living. Though I still wasn’t sure how long I’d been asleep even after it had dumped me off. I woke up in my bed still posed like I was before I’d passed out — face to the side and lying on my belly. I peeked at the clock beside my bed to check the time. A note was taped to its face that read,

  I looked up at the dreamcatcher. Gobs of black tourmalines had been added to the web. Their placement confirmed my suspicions, but their numbers left me staggered. I’d seen less bling on some of my mother’s old pageant dresses. It may as well have been a noose hanging up there. Silas wouldn’t have added that many Boogie-Man blockers unless he’d been ordered to do so.

  Yep, I sighed. Tanner knows…

  I slipped out of my robe and changed into some clothes without too much pain. The wound was still open on the surface, but I could tell a lot of it had already closed up, thankfully. And it wasn’t gushing blood anymore, another bonus. Now I just wished I felt more healed on the inside. I still felt paying some sort of penance was justified; something to con me into believing Tanner didn’t think less of me.

  He shouldn’t have tied on the first stone…

  I realized it was 6:30 PM the next evening when I grabbed my cell. Good thing the effects of embervale included corking your bladder. Though the shame of having to parade a heaping wad of yellow-tinged linens up to the laundry room would have been a fitting start to atone for my ill-considered omissions and reckless deeds. I brought my phone along to check my messages. A slew of them popped up once I was topside. I listened to Samuel’s voicemail first, thinking I would get any bad news out of the way first.