The Perfect Guy: A Romance Novel

by LaCarro, Maria

  The house was really cute. It was a white brick house with a dark brown roof, a small porch, and a single garage. The area of grass in front of it could barely be called a lawn, but I could see what James meant. He was one person, and he didn’t need more than this.

  The inside was roughly the same size as my old apartment had been. It had a kitchen slash living area, a decent sized bathroom, and two bedrooms where he could easily make one of them into an office if he needed to. One room connected all of these together, and in the middle, the stairs led down to the basement.

  “What do you think?” James asked when he entered behind me with his one bag.

  “It’s really nice, but, uhm…” It hadn’t gone unnoticed by me that there was absolutely no furniture, and I wondered where he would sleep tonight. “There’s no furniture.”

  James chuckled. “Yeah, I know. I sent after my old furniture from Chicago. It should be here later this afternoon.”

  “Oh good,” I said and smile at my own stupidity. Of course he had thought of that before moving in. If he hadn’t owned furniture from before, he probably would have bought new ones. “For a second, I thought you’d have to sleep on the floor.”

  James stepped closer to me and moved my hair so that it hung over my back instead of my shoulder. “Would you have allowed me to do that, if that had been the case?” he asked with a tiny bit of huskiness in his voice.

  I felt the urge to whimper, but I held it in. Of course I knew what he was referring to, and I decided to just tease him a bit. “Well, I don’t know. I guess I could have lent you the mattress from the spare bedroom, but I don’t really know what else I could have done about it,” I said, and James groaned because he knew what I was doing, which of course caused me to laugh softly.

  James and I hadn’t shared a bed yet—not even when just sleeping—and it made me feel very secure in our blooming relationship because it wasn’t just based on sex. Of course I hoped that when we actually sealed the deal, we wouldn’t become one of those couples that very rarely had sex when some time had passed in our relationship.

  I was a strong believer in having a healthy sex life, but with that said, I wasn’t any kind of nymphomaniac.

  “But seriously, I think this could become a beautiful home with some personal touches added,” I said and turned around to face the rooms again. “In fact, I’ll be quite interested in seeing what kind of furniture you had back in Chicago,” I continued with a wink over my shoulder.

  “Don’t for a second believe that I had any kind of bachelor pad before. I might have been single, but my home was my sanctuary, and it was important to me to surround myself with things that I liked,” he replied with a smirk.

  “Well, that’s good. I’d hate to be with a man that’s so predictable,” I said as if that’s what he’d been so far.

  He then leaned in close to my ear. “You of all people should know that I am not predictable,” he said lowly, and it caused a pleasant shiver to run down my spine. I liked that even though James had changed immensely during our time apart, there were still traces of the man I used to know inside. He was just the right amount of intimidating to keep things interesting.

  “I guess I’ll never get bored in our relationship then,” I responded equally low. His hands traced around my waist and settled on my round stomach, and it caused goose bumps to erupt all over my skin. I just loved that whenever he touched me, he always included Baby.

  I knew he’d told me that he was ready to take on the responsibility I needed him to take if we were going to be in a relationship, but when he made these gestures, they told me that he was very much aware of the fact that I was a soon-to-be mom, and he had absolutely nothing against it. He even embraced it.

  It was a huge turn-on for me.

  “Bored is the last thing you’ll be,” James whispered and then began to kiss my neck.

  The shivers that went through me this time were so violent; I just wasn’t able to hold in my moan.

  “Fuck!” I exclaimed underneath my breath. “James, if you keep that up, I will self-combust right here on the spot.”

  I felt his smile against my neck. “And we wouldn’t want that, would we?” His teasing made me roll my eyes.

  I stepped out of his embrace and placed myself at a safe distance so that I could get a real proper look at the house. “What’s your plan?” I asked in order to distract myself and keep my head out of the gutter.

  “Plan for what?” James asked confused.

  I giggled. “Your plan for the interior,” I clarified. “How are you going to place everything?”

  He shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ll figure it out when everything’s here.”

  James knew that I was making inane small talk for the sake of keeping things on the cool for us, and he didn’t try to get me off that path because neither of us wanted our first time to be in the claws of passion on his new hardware floors.

  Still, he didn’t try to avoid the subject either. “It’s becoming more difficult every day,” he said, referring to the fact that it had been close to three weeks since that night on the couch.

  “Don’t I know it,” I mumbled underneath my breath, and then a little louder. “You know it’s kind of stupid. It feels like we’re waiting for this perfect moment, but that’s just weird because we both want to and we shouldn’t have to hold back.”

  “No, we shouldn’t,” James agreed. “There just seems to have been a lot of distractions during the past few weeks.”

  “Yeah, and it won’t exactly get easier,” I said and stroked my stomach. James’s eyes looked down at my hand, but even though I’d just said that Baby would make a sex life more complicated, his eyes got a sort of soft tone to them when he looked at my stomach.

  We left that conversation for another time and decided to explore the basement. James helped me down the stairs because there was no railing for me to hold on to.

  It was a very spacious basement with a lot of potential. You wouldn’t necessarily have to use it as storage space only, and the previous owners had put in a beautiful navy blue carpet and painted the walls white to let in some light.

  While James and I waited for his furniture, we exchanged ideas for what he could do with the space. I’d jokingly said that he could turn it into a man cave, but he said that since he would live alone, the entire house would be a man cave.

  When the time for when the truck should arrive closed in, we went back upstairs and outside so that we could easily see the vehicle when it came onto the street, but when we’d stood there for almost an hour, we started to suspect something was wrong.

  “Do you think they’re lost?”

  “I don’t know,” James said and fished his phone out of his pocket so that he could give a call to the movers.

  “Great,” he muttered when he hung up ten minute later. “They had problems with their tires on the way and it took hours to fix them. Apparently, they won’t be here until tomorrow night.”

  “Oh…” I tried to come up with a quick solution. “Well, I guess you could sleep at my place for another night. I’ll just have to make a quick call to my dad and tell him that I’ll be over tomorrow instead.”

  James frowned. “You were going to your dad’s tonight?”

  “Yeah, I was supposed to move in with them tonight for the remaining weeks of my pregnancy. You know, since Sue’s my doctor and everything. We just thought that would be for the best,” I explained.

  “You never told me that.”

  “I didn’t?”

  He shook his head, and somehow, an awkward tension developed between us, although I had no idea why. It wasn’t like it was a huge deal that I’d forgotten to tell him. We would still see each other. I’d just live somewhere else for a while.

  “Uhm, I’ll just go in and make that call,” I said, and James nodded.

  I felt relieved when the door closed behind me and he couldn’t see me anymore.

  CHAPTER 31

  OVERWHELMING CONFESSI
ONS

  The silence still hung over us when we walked through my front door.

  We had barely spoken since before I called Dad and Sue and told them of what had happened and that I’d be over tomorrow instead, and I didn’t understand why James acted so strange.

  “Do you want a cup of coffee?” I asked, but he just shook his head. “Do you want to watch a movie?”

  He shrugged. “I guess,” he said as if he couldn’t care less what we did.

  I felt fed up with his behavior and dropped my keys onto the table loudly. He looked at me and I crossed my arms over my chest. “What’s your problem?” I asked without beating around the bush.

  James wasn’t one of those guys who pretended there was nothing wrong and made you drag it out of them. We both knew something was wrong, so why pretend there wasn’t?

  “Why didn’t you tell me that you were moving into your Dad’s?”

  “I don’t know. I guess I forgot and then thought I had. Why is it so important anyway?”

  “Why do I get the feeling that you’re distancing yourself from me?”

  I threw my arms out in a gesture that said I had no idea why he felt that way. “How am I supposed to know that? It’s your head and thoughts. I can’t read it.”

  He sighed. “Jenn, I thought we were building something together, that you trusted me again, but hearing you say that you’re sticking with the plans you made before I came back into your life, makes me question that.”

  “What are you talking about? Why would I change those kinds of plans? It’s just precautions for Baby’s health,” I explained, but he shook his head.

  “It might be, but I’m pretty damn sure you all made those plans so that someone would be there to take you to the hospital when you’ve gone into labor. Well, I’m here now, and I would very much like to be a part of this child’s birth,” he said and his voice softened toward the end.

  “Why does it matter who drives me to the hospital?” I really couldn’t understand why he made such a big deal out of it.

  “Look, I know Baby’s not mine, but I’ve accepted the responsibility of becoming a surrogate father, and I would like to be viewed as one, not just a guy whose girlfriend happens to be pregnant.”

  I nodded. “Yes, I get that, James, but you haven’t answered my question. Why does it matter?”

  “Because it’s the father who should be there when the water breakes, he’s the one who should break the traffic laws in order to get to the hospital in time, and he should be the one holding your hand when you’re in so much pain during the contractions,” he said passionately.

  I suddenly understood what it was all about. “Are you afraid you’ll be left out?”

  James looked away from me and inhaled deeply. “I just don’t want to get a call when it’s all over.” He turned back to me. “I know I haven’t said this before, but Jenn, I love you, and I want to be there and share that life-changing moment with you, just the way the father of a child should.”

  I was shocked into silence by his words. I knew he and I were getting quite serious, and I’d had my suspicions of his feelings, but to actually hear him say it was quite overwhelming. We’d only been seeing each other for three months—two if you didn’t count the month he was back in Chicago—and I felt nowhere near the point where I could say the L-word to him.

  As the silence stretched on, I could feel the pressure building.

  “James, I…” I finally got out, but after that, I didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t go any further, and he must have understood that.

  “I know that I’ve hurt you more than I would really like to know, and I don’t want you to ever feel like you have to say it back just because I said it, but I thought you needed to know. I also love this child as much as I would my own, and I will show it every day after the birth.”

  James stepped closer to me and placed his hands lightly on my waist. “I’m not going anywhere, Jenn. I’m here for the long run.”

  Tears welled up in my eyes, and I had to swallow repeatedly to dissolve the lump that had formed in my throat.

  I would never have thought that James was this guy, not even at our first meeting. It felt soothing for my heart to know that the guy I’d given my heart to so long ago had finally become the person who deserved it.

  However, I suddenly felt fear grip me.

  I realized that I’d focused so much on James, and if he was ready for the responsibility of having a child that I’d forgotten about myself.

  Was I truly ready to play family with him?

  When I’d made the decision to become pregnant, I’d prepared myself for being a single mom. It would be just me and my baby, and I had been content with that thought.

  Now, the entire situation would change because James would become a permanent fixture in my life. If things ended badly between us, it wouldn’t just stop there. He’d just said so himself. He loved my child and would create a bond, and his feelings would only grow deeper.

  James would forever be this child’s father if he stayed around long enough for Baby to develop memories of him, and he probably would because he was, as he said, “In it for the long run.”

  I felt that I really needed to be alone and process this new epiphany I’d had. It freaked me out a bit that I hadn’t thought of it earlier.

  “I, uhm…” I began, and James looked at me almost expectantly. “I think I need to go to bed,” I said, and I could see that it was not what James had expected.

  “Sure.” He nodded. “I’ll stay up a bit longer, but I’ll see you in the morning.”

  “Great,” I replied and climbed the stairs toward my bedroom. I felt as if I was in a daze, and even though I’d told James I would go to bed, I didn’t fall asleep until hours later. My mind was too jumbled up for me to relax.

  I paced the length of my room as I tried to determine how I felt, and later, I stared at my ceiling, still not feeling close to sleep.

  The next day, however, I felt much calmer, and I suddenly realized that my fears had only stemmed from hearing James say the words I didn’t feel ready to utter myself. But he’d told me that it was okay.

  During the night I had dreamt of the future, when Baby was born, and my subconscious hadn’t eradicated James from the picture. He’d been right in the middle of it as I’d handed him the baby after a feeding.

  He’d expertly taken my child in his arms and made grimaces until Baby laughed with delight.

  It was safe to say that I was no longer afraid. I yearned for it, and I couldn’t wait. If James was ready to be a father, I would not hold him back.

  The first thing I would do to correct everything was to begin my maternity leave now and not in two weeks. If I was going to be stuck in a house, I wouldn’t mind it as long as James was there. I was going to use that time to give him all the info he wanted on my pregnancy. I hadn’t even shown him the ultrasound pictures yet, even though he’d been there when Sue did an emergency ultrasound during that scary night when I hadn’t felt Baby’s movements.

  Sue had, luckily, not found anything that indicated that Baby would be anything but completely healthy.

  I immediately picked up my phone and dialed Demetri’s number.

  “Cardinelli.”

  “Hey, Dem, it’s Jenn.”

  ”Hi, little Braun!” My boss had called me little Braun from the very beginning since both Dad and I worked at the force. “What can I do for you? I thought this was your day off.”

  “It is, but I wanted to ask you if it would be all right if I went on my maternity leave a bit earlier.”

  “Yeah, sure. How much earlier did you have in mind?”

  “Uhm, like starting today.”

  There was only silence on the other end for a few seconds. “Is everything okay with you and the baby?”

  “Yeah, we’re both fine, but you know how Sue’s been badgering me from the start that I shouldn’t wait until last minute and Dad too. I just thought I’d humor them this one time.”
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br />   “Okay, well, there shouldn’t really be a problem with that. Felix knows the deal, and I’m sure he won’t mind stepping in a couple of weeks earlier.”

  “Thank you so much, Dem! But remember to keep Cato on his toes. Narcotics will be waiting for him when I come back.”

  “Of course! I wouldn’t dream of replacing you with Cato. He’s good, but you’re better.”

  I smiled at that and we hung up after he wished me luck with the baby, and he expected Dad to give them all a raise when his first grandchild was born. Well, he could wish at least.

  I got dressed in loose, comfy clothes and went downstairs where I heard James in the kitchen already. I wanted to sneak up to him and surprise him with my happier mood, but when you’re the size of a small whale, it’s kind of hard to sneak, and he heard me before I’d even reached the bottom of the stairs.

  “Hey,” I said with a smile when he met my eyes. He was shirtless again, but I had kind of gotten used to it while we lived together. It still made me tingle inside seeing him like that, though.

  “Hey,” he said and then turned back around toward the coffee machine.

  I knew he was still feeling hurt from the night before, but I wasn’t having that today, and had my stomach allowed it, I would have wanted to snake my arms around him from behind. However, I wouldn’t have been able to reach all the way, so instead, I just stood behind him, laid my hands on his bare shoulders, and placed a small kiss between his shoulder blades.

  He sucked in a sharp breath and then slowly turned around to face me.

  I looked up at him with apologetic eyes. “I’m sorry for freaking out last night,” I said. “Your confession kind of overwhelmed me a bit.”

  He nodded and gently placed a strand of hair behind my ear. “I figured that much.”

  “Can you forgive me for being so insensitive?”

  He shook his head. “You weren’t insensitive, but do you understand what I was trying to say now?”

  I nodded. “Yes, I do, and I have a compromise for you.” I paused and he waited for me to continue. “I decided to start my maternity leave today instead, and I was thinking that I would stay with you during the days, either here, or your new house, but I will sleep at Dad’s. I just really want to be close to Sue these last few weeks. Call me paranoid, but this is my first baby, and I’m so scared of any complications.”