by Edie Bryant
“Mmm, where are we?” she mumbled as I stopped the car.
I reached up to her eyes and covered them with my hand. This seemed to wake her up even more, as she instinctively wriggled her face away from my hand.
“Uh, so, what are you doing?” she asked.
“Don’t look yet! Close your eyes! I want it to be a surprise.”
“Okay…” she said hesitantly.
“Okay! Hold on! I’ll get the car door for you!”
I hopped out and ran to the passenger side door, and, to my relief, her eyes were still closed. I took her hand and guided her out of the car.
“Alright, open them!” I said eagerly.
She opened her eyes to see the sun setting over the wheat field where I’d first realized I’d been madly in love with her. I could literally see the joy fill her.
“What are we doing here?” she laughed.
“You remember how I told you that this was where I first fell in love with you?” I asked.
“Yes, of course.”
“And that was my first time falling in love at all, with anyone. So I saw it only fitting that it be the place where I last fall in love with anyone.”
She looked confused. “What on earth are you talking about?”
Good, so she still wasn’t expecting it.
Without a warning, I pulled a small black box out of my pocket and got down on one knee.
Her hands flew to her mouth. “Oh my god, Lauren, you aren’t!”
“I am,” I smiled at her. “Sara, I’ve known I wanted to marry you since I was 18 years old. Sorry it’s taken me so long to ask, but I think the journey to you has been exactly what I needed to know how much I value our relationship. So, I’m locking this down, if you’ll have me as your wife. Will you marry me?”
Happy tears spilled out of the corner of her eyes. “Yes! Absolutely, positively, yes!” she squealed.
I hopped back up onto my feet and wrapped my arms around her, spinning her around in circles and planting kisses all over her cheeks and neck. She giggled the same way she always did when I drenched her in kisses.
“I love this woman!” she yelled out into the empty field, as we embraced once more.
This time, our embrace was less excited. It was calm, intimate, filled with the knowledge that we were finally finding our happy ending.
“This was the absolute perfect place to propose,” she told me.
“I knew you’d like it,” I answered. “I figured, this is where we started our adventure together, so it was the perfect place to change up that adventure a little.”
“Just continuing the journey, huh?” she asked.
“That’s right.”
“It has been a crazy one,” she said, as she tucked herself under my arm.
“That it has, babe. That it has.”
“You really ready to continue it with little old me?”
I laughed. “I’ve never been more ready for anything in my entire life.”
CLICK HERE to get a FREE bonus chapter of Two Lovers!
Continue reading for an excerpt from my other lesbian romance novel Broken Record!
FREE Broken Record Excerpt
Broken Record Preview
15
Lindsay
Lindsay
I was just about to print the check for my last table when my coworker, Lisa, walked up to me with a nervous smile.
“Tell me John’s not asking me to do a double,” I said in an exasperated tone before she even got to speak.
John was my manager, and though I generally liked him as a boss, he did have a habit of overworking his employees.
“No, it’s not that,” Lisa said hesitantly. “It’s just that another table asked for you as their server.”
“Seriously?” I rolled my eyes. “But it’s my last table and I’m already cut.”
“I can tell her no, if you want. I have no problem taking it myself, it’s just that she seemed pretty insistent.”
“Wait, is it Mary?” I asked.
“I don't know her name, a little old lady? Pink flower in her hair?”
“That’s her. I’ll stay for her, that’s fine.”
“Okay.” She shrugged. ”I’ll let John know you’re staying for an extra table.”
I didn’t mind Mary at all. Not only did she tip ridiculously well, she was such a sweet old lady. Never had a bad thing to say about anyone or anything. She was always good for some pleasant conversation.
It would actually be nice to finish out my shift with her. I still had side work to do anyway, so it wasn’t like I was ready to walk out the door. I could do my side work in between serving her, and I’d end my shift in a good mood.
I dropped off the check at my last table and walked over to Mary, not even bothering to open up my order pad. She always got the same thing.
“Hey, Mary.” I gave her a grin and she returned it.
“Oh, hello, Lindsay!” she said softly. “I’m so glad you’re working today.”
“Oh, you know I work every weekend brunch! How have you been?”
“I’m just fine. Just the usual in my life. There’s no excitement left when you hit eighty-one.”
“Oh, stop!” I told her. “I know you’re not a day over forty.”
She laughed. “Oh, Lindsay, you sweet thing. You are too perfect. Are you sure I can’t set you up with my grandchild?”
“You know I can’t date,” I told her with a crooked smile. “I have both of my jobs to think about.”
And I wasn’t just saying that to get Mary off my back. I meant it. I didn’t date and hadn’t since high school. My life truly was too hectic as it was.
“And how is the music career coming along?” she asked.
I didn’t generally talk to my customers about my aspirations outside of waiting tables, but Mary was different. She had tried really hard to get to know me over the years and I gladly let her. Talking to her made me happy.
“It’s going… all right,” I answered honestly. “I’m still making my cover videos and putting them up online, but I’m not getting much traction.”
“Well, don’t worry.” She nodded sweetly. “I know you’re going to be a star, it’s just a matter of time.”
I wished I had her confidence. I certainly didn’t have much confidence in myself anymore.
When I moved out to LA after high school in hopes of becoming a recording artist, a big part of me really believed I could make it. Not only did I play guitar and piano well, but I had an excellent singing voice. Why be humble about it? It was the truth. I was damn good.
In my small Midwestern town, I was the best musician I knew. I was constantly getting praised growing up. I won every talent show and I sang the lead in every musical. If it involved singing or playing music, I did it.
But Los Angeles wasn’t exactly a small town. I was no longer the big fish in a little pond. I quickly realized that talent alone was not enough to make it out here.
LA was filled with talented people. I was merely another face. No matter how many demos I sent out, I always got the same reply… I was good and I had talent, but there was nothing that made me stand out from the crowd of people who were also trying to find their musical start.
Though I still had my hopes that I’d eventually make it, I doubted it at this point. Every year, I got a little older and less suited to being famous.
Maybe I should have moved on by now. Gone to school instead of chased this silly little dream. But every time I considered buckling down and doing something else, I ached.
It wasn’t that I somehow believed I deserved to be famous—I didn’t. It wasn’t like I’d be incapable of getting a better job than serving. I could work a 9-5, sure, that wasn’t what bothered me.
What I absolutely hated was feeling like I had wasted so much time. I had put years into this, years of my life that I’d never get back. To fail now, after all this time, would really fucking hurt.
Which was why I continued to live this lif
e. Continued to struggle serving and refused to waste my time with dating. Every year that passed by, I worked harder. I could feel my time running out and all my free time went into making my music and attempting to market it to record producers.
“So,” I said to Mary, “Just the usual today?”
“That’s right, my dear.” She smiled sweetly.
“Perfect, let me ring it up and I’ll be back. You’re my last table today so we can chat for a bit.”
“Oh, I’d love that!” she cooed as I walked away to put in her order.
But when I came back, it became clear that a casual chat was out of the question.
I was the first one to see it happen. As I walked back from the Posi and toward Mary’s table, it looked as if her head was wobbling slightly. It was hard to be sure. Her head only barely peeked out from the top of the booth, and then it disappeared.
Before I had time to react, I saw her body on the floor and panic rolled through me.
“Call 911!” I started shouting as I ran to her as fast as I could. “Someone, call 911 now!”
“I’m on it!” Lisa said as she pulled out her cell phone. She was about to walk out the door when she heard me screaming.
Instinct kicked in. I used to be a lifeguard, and all the training I’d once had for that came flooding to the front of my mind.
I immediately knelt down to check if she had a pulse. I couldn’t find one, so I began compressions.
I didn’t know how long it actually took for the ambulance to arrive. It was likely only minutes, but it felt like hours. My heart was racing faster with each compression that failed to make her heart beat again.
But the EMTs were far more prepared than I. They rushed in with a defibrillator and demanded I removed my hands from Mary’s body so they could attempt to restart her heart. I waited with bated breath as they sent the first wave of electricity through her and nothing happened.
Fuck, was this it? Did I just watch this sweet old lady pass away? A woman I spoke to nearly every weekend? Maybe the only customer I’d ever had who actually seemed to care about me as a person?
My heart sank at the thought.
I watched as they, once again, brought the two metal paddles to her chest and shot a volt of electricity through her tiny body. And that was it. That was the shock that had her gasping for air.
“Oh, fuck, thank God.” I sighed as I watched her little chest begin to pump blood through the rest of her body. One hand flew to her chest as she gasped, the other to the top of her head, where it clenched her thin gray hair.
“Okay, Ma’am, we’re going to take you to the county hospital,” one of the EMTs said as they lifted her tiny body onto a stretcher.
She couldn’t yet speak, but she nodded. For a minute, I think she forgot where she was. I saw recognition come across her face as she stared at the black-and-white checkered floors.
And then her face found mine. I’d never seen so much desperation in her pale blue eyes before. She reached her hand out to me, and I instinctively grabbed it.
“It’s okay. You’re going to be okay,” I told her softly, though obviously, I had no idea how things were going to turn out.
She nodded softly, clearly unsure.
“I’ll come see you, okay? I’ll come visit you. Don’t worry, I won’t let you be alone.”
This looked like it actually comforted her a bit and she loosened her grip on my hand as they began to wheel her away into the ambulance.
As they went out the door, I found myself sinking into the red leather booth where Mary had just been sitting.
I had never felt such a range of emotions in a mere ten minutes. So much for a happy, cheerful end to my shift with Mary.
But I had meant what I promised her. I was going to go see her tonight. Even though I knew that, right now, she was breathing and okay, that didn’t diminish my concern for her.
There was no good reason for someone to collapse and completely stop breathing. She was old, and I knew this wasn’t a sign of good health.
I allowed myself ten minutes to compose myself at the booth before I willed myself to get up and clock out. I probably would’ve stayed there all night if I hadn’t set a time limit. I never responded very well to traumatic events and this had been so completely unexpected.
As I was reflecting, I realized I didn’t have many friends my age. Besides the few coworkers who were really more of acquaintances, Mary was the only person I really talked to about my life.
Maybe that sounded weird, that some sweet old lady who came in for brunch on weekends was my only friend. But that was the reality of my situation.
I had a lot of friends in high school and I always meant to find more here in LA, but it never worked out. Well, to be more honest, I never really tried. I was not exaggerating when I said that nearly all of my time was spent trying to advance my musical career.
There was a lot to do to work on my music. I wrote new songs, practiced them until I felt they were good enough, recorded them, mixed and mastered them, made videos of me playing them to put online, created demos to send to record companies… And I tried to create new music as often as I creatively could.
Again, I probably should have slowed down and tried to catch up with my life a bit. Make some friends, get some hobbies, learn to relax outside of work and music. But I just couldn’t. My sense of urgency to make my musical career work was too great.
And now, my only friend, the only person I looked forward to talking with every week, was in the hospital for God knows what. I could feel it sending me into an existential crisis.
I didn’t take a lot of time to reflect on my life. I stayed as busy as possible and I liked it that way. But what if I had been doing this life thing all wrong?
Maybe my dedication to my work wasn't the most important thing. After seeing what had just happened to Mary, I suddenly felt so fucking lonely. I had just witnessed this traumatic event happen to someone I cared about and I had nobody to talk to about it.
I wasn’t going to think on it any longer, though. My ten minutes had passed. I got up and forced myself to walk to my car.
I wasn’t going to second guess my life anymore. I wasn’t even going to think about Mary until it was time to go visit her later.
As usual, I was going to avoid all the negativity.
16
Heather
The shrill alarm on my phone woke me up with a jolt. I groaned, rolled over, and pressed the button to put the damn thing on snooze.
It was the weekend, and I didn’t have work or anything, but I still had a weekend alarm set for around noon because I simply couldn’t justify sleeping in past then.
Usually, it wasn’t a problem. Even sleeping in, I rarely got up after 10am. But today I wanted nothing more than to continue sleeping past 2pm.
I’d had kind of a rough night. A few of my friends insisted that I go out to this new gay bar with them. Well, friends was a pretty loose term… I didn’t hang out with them much, but we did do business together often and there was a lot of time for small talk in our line of work.
We rarely ever went out together. But they insisted on dragging me with them last night. They didn’t say it, but I knew the reason.
I rarely did anything just for the fun of it these days. Ever since I had taken over my company when the CEO retired, work had become my biggest priority. I couldn’t even remember the last time I went on an actual date.
I think they were hoping that I’d actually meet someone last night. And, if I was being honest, I kind of was too.
I’d been starting to get lonely in the last year. I loved my job and I enjoyed striving for success, but it didn’t exactly keep me warm at night.
And, really, there was no reason for me to be single. Not to sound conceited, but I was quite the catch. I was good looking, I made great money, I was very committed in my relationships. You’d think I’d have no problem with dating.
But I wasn’t as young as I used to be. In my 30s, it seem
ed harder to find someone. Whenever I did end up going out to clubs or bars, it was clear the crowd there was quite a bit younger than me.
Not that that was a problem in itself. I wouldn’t mind dating someone a little younger than me, if they were mature and on the same page in life as me. But that was the problem—most young women weren’t.
I had no interest in partying anymore; I had long outgrown that stage in my life. I wanted someone who also was deeply dedicated to their work and was interested in settling down with someone. When I dated someone, I wanted marriage to be on the horizon. I couldn’t wait for a twenty-five-year-old who still hadn’t gotten out of their drinking days to be ready to commit to a serious life with me.
And I certainly wouldn’t settle for less. I’d done that before in the past, too many times. Things never worked out when you actively chose to be with someone who wasn’t on the same life path as you were. It was a waste of my time.
But knowing that I didn’t want to settle didn’t make me any less frustrated with the fact that I couldn’t find anyone who fit into my life.
I had everything going for me. My life was exactly as I hoped it would be when I was younger. The only thing missing was someone to share it with.
But obviously, I wasn’t going to find that slumming it at bars. I really regretted going out last night; I should have known better. And after an hour with no reasonable prospects, I started to get very frustrated and a little depressed, which, of course, led to me seriously over drinking.
And I was paying for it today. My head was still pounding with the mistakes of the previous night. I didn’t even like drinking, so why did I do this to myself? Why did I go out and let myself get all sad about being single?
The sun was shining way too brightly through my window. I sank under the blankets and pulled my feather comforter up above my head. It was white, so while it did block out some of the light, it was still plenty bright. Which I didn’t appreciate.