Marrying My Childhood Sweetheart: A BWWM Christian Romance
Page 5
Chapter 5
Sara barely caught a glimpse of a large minimalist bedroom before he placed her on his king sized gently. “I want to undress you slowly and see every inch of your body,” he murmured. “I want to take my time but I don’t know if I can.”
Her blouse buttoned at the front and he slowly pulled the first one open. It was pure torture for her as she lie still; letting him do what he wanted. He finally pulled the shirt from the waistband of her pants. Then he just looked at her; one hand trailing over the generous curve of her breast over the lace of her white bra.
“You’re so beautiful,” he pushed away the scrap of material; exposing her full round flesh with nipples as hard as pebbles. “I used to dream about you; about doing this to you and wondered if I would ever get the chance again,” He bent his head and Sara arched her body in anticipation of his mouth on her. He sucked her nipple inside his mouth; pulling on it and blowing, causing the tension to build up inside her. She sank her fingers in his hair; a cry building up inside her throat. He shifted to her other breast to give it the same attention.
He sat up and kneeled over her, pulling down her pants to reveal tiny matching panties. His fingers trailed over her upper thigh, dangerously close to her pubic area. His head was bent as he looked at her. Sara came up on her elbows so that she could get a better look at him. There was no light in the bedroom; only the sliver of light in the passage way. His hair had fallen down on his forehead and Sara wanted to brush it back. He took off her panties and then took off his clothes. Sara stared at him; her heart jumping inside her chest. He had filled out. He was not the same lanky boy from her childhood days, the muscles rippled on his chest and arms and there was a sprinkling of dark hair drifting down to his pubic area. His erection stood out proudly and she remembered how she had always teased him that maybe he was part black because how else would he be so generously endowed.
He watched her watching him and he watched as she reached out and touch him there, causing a jolt to enter his body. He ran his hand over her pubic area, fingers drifting down to her opening which was already wet. She opened her legs to him and he dipped his fingers inside her; watching her face as he worked his fingers inside. Sara clamped her legs tight around his fingers, her back arching. “David,” she cried out, her hands gripping the sheets.
“Tell me what you want me to do,” he said hoarsely, his fingers pressing inside her. “Tell me what to do to you.”
“I want you inside me please,” She gasped. “Please David, I want you inside me.”
He took out his fingers, moist with her wetness and rose over her, guiding his erection inside her; she opened up for him and he eased inside her tightness, his teeth clenched. He started moving and she went with him; lifting her hips to draw him in closer. “Sara!” he cried out hoarsely, taking her lips with his as he plunged inside her, his hands tight on her hips as he lifted her to meet his thrusts. She closed over him like a vice and met his thrusts with her frenzied ones. She had missed this and she did not realized it; she had missed him and the way he made her feel and she had been contented to live with second best. He filled her up and she fitted him so well that it was like they were molded together as one.
She lifted her legs and clasped them around his waist, giving him more, wanting more of him. He came before her, he wanted to wait for her but he could not hold back any longer and releasing her mouth he cried out hoarsely as he spilled his seed inside her; his body shaking. His spasms were over before she started feeling the sensation rushing through her. “David,” she cried out, digging her fingers into his shoulders as the wave crashed over her. He held her to him as they both rode out the wave together.
He rested his forehead against hers and she held him to her; loathe letting him go. There was so much she wanted to say to him; how sorry she was and how she would never make the mistake of leaving again if he only gave her a second chance.
But before she could say anything; he rolled off and got off the bed leaving her cold and lonely without his body on hers. “It’s late, and your dad may be wondering where you are,” he told her abruptly, pulling on his pants.
Sara stiffened and with a resolute look on her face she slid off the bed; looking for pieces of her clothing. To hell with him, she thought as she hurriedly got dressed. His back was to her and he had sat on a flimsy piece of ottoman that looked out of place in the room.
“I’m ready,” she told him stiffly; already going towards the door.
He caught her just as she reached the hallway and pulled her arm to turn her around. “I want to beg you to stay with me and forget the hurt and pain I felt when you left; I want to bury myself inside you over and over again but I can’t, not now.” He told her roughly and with a groan he took her lips in a bruising kiss that had her leaning against him weakly; then he released her; his breathing irregular.
“Go Sara,” he told he wearily. “Please, before I change my mind.” She left without a word and when she got into her car she saw him at the window looking out at her. She gunned the engine and drove off; combing a hand through her tousled hair; her mind in turmoil and her body craving him.
*****
He didn’t call her. Not even to find out if she had reached home safely. Sara told herself she did not care; but she did and that night she found herself going over the night and her body tingled as she remembered what it had been like. She loved him and she knew that now; but the problem was how was she going to convince him she was here to stay and she was not going anywhere?
The next day at work she hardly had time to think about him; the store was so busy. It was summer break and the children and young people had decided to spend some time at the bookstore; probably to get out of the stifling heat or to take advantage of the free Wi-Fi services offered. Some of them even bought books and CDs. Her father had stepped out for a bit and she was manning the store by herself. It was approaching three o’clock and the store had emptied somewhat when she came in. Sally Graham was a female replica of her son; she only lacked his towering height and Sara remembered the many times she had been at her house when she and David were together. Sara felt herself standing to her full height unconsciously as she turned to face the petite woman; she'd seen her at church the times she had been there but had always managed to avoid her.
“My dear,” she greeted Sara warmly. “I have not officially seen you since your return.”
Sara forced a smile and greeted the older woman, taking her small hand in hers. “Hi Sally, you haven’t aged a bit.”
“And you have done something wonderful with your hair,” Sally walked over and sat on one of the chairs available, forcing Sara to do the same. “You are such a beautiful girl; I can see why my David is finding it hard to get over you.”
“Sally, I am sorry but my relationship with David is not up for discussion,” Sara said firmly even though she was quaking inside. The woman hated her and she could not blame her.
“So there is a relationship?” she looked at the girl curiously. She was so beautiful and David did not stand a chance.
“That’s between us,” Sara said politely, wishing a ton of customers would invade the store to save her from this awkward conversation.
“When you left David several years ago, I had to pry him out of bed.” She began as if she did not hear her. “He would not eat and he spent his nights just staring at the phone hoping it would ring and hoping it would be you. I ached for him and I found myself wishing I could give him something to ease his pain; but it’s not like a physical pain is it? You can’t just give a person a pill and say take two times a day for a week, can you? So I sat there watching him suffer and could not do anything about it and now you’re back, looking more beautiful than ever and my David is back to suffering again; only this time it is even worse because he gets to see you and remember and want and wonder if he allows you back in; if you’ll leave again.”
Sara sat there and listened to every word that dug spikes inside her heart and she did n
ot know what to say but she refused to apologize to David’s mother – she was not David.
“I can’t take back what I did,” Sara told her soberly. “But I am telling you right now that it’s between David and I.”
Sally sat there measuring the younger girl coolly, her hazel eyes considering. Sara had worn a simple cotton dress with thin straps and she looked young and vibrant. Her make-up was light and almost colorless lip gloss highlighted her full lips.
“I wish he was twelve years old again so that I could forbid him to see you,” she said with a slight smile. “But I can’t, can I? He is a grown man and I can’t tell him what to do and who to see. He will do what he pleases; all I can do is pray for him.”
“I am sure that is enough,” Sara told her calmly. The woman was all but telling her that she was praying for her not to be a part of David’s life and she felt as if she was barely holding on. David still had not called her and now his mother was here castigating her, it was too much. “I think you underestimate David, he can take care of himself just fine. And he is not running back into my arms like you think. Like I said; you underestimate him.”
“I don’t hate you,” Sally stood, staring at her. “It would be unchristian for me to do so, I just hate what you did to my son and one day when you grow up and have children you will find out.”
“I am grown up,” Sara’s voice was frosty. “And I understand. Some mothers do not like to see their children hurt.”
“I am sorry about your mother my dear,” Sally told her. “Truly I am, but my first priority is to David and I make no apologies for that.” With that she turned around and left, leaving Sara sitting there fighting back tears. It was when several customers came in that she got up and with a determined smile she went and do her job; she was not about to let anyone get her down; least of all David’s mother.
*****
David balled up the paper and threw it towards the waste basket and it missed yet again. The room was strewn with paper he had discarded in his attempt to write the commentary he was supposed to be writing. He was a freelance editor for the local newspaper and had started out doing one article a week to now being asked to do four articles for the week. It was something he did aside from his work in the greenhouse and if people asked him which he preferred; he would have no idea what to tell them. But right now he was having a hard time thinking. He had not slept the night before; and her scent was all over his bed, so much so that he had changed the sheets; but putting on fresh ones did not help because her scent still lingered in his room. He should not have taken her to bed. But what else could he have done? He had thought making love with her would probably get her out of his system but that had backfired on him; what it had done was to make her dig deeper inside him and now he wanted to see her so bad he was trembling from it.
“Damn you Sara,” he whispered brokenly; burying his head in his hands. He had spent so many years trying to get over her and when he had finally reached a place where he could go on without her; she had come back looking more achingly beautiful than before. He had not done an ounce of work since he had been up at dawn. His green house needed his attention and his article was due tomorrow.
He stood up and went to the window to look out on his garden. It was a very hot day and the sun was blazing down on his begonias and petunias making them look wilted. He had found out from an early age that he loved to dig in the dirt and he loved to plant things. When other boys his age were playing with action figures and riding bikes, he was making a garden at the back of his parents’ house. His dad had bought him a trowel and some seeds and had told him that if he did not pay attention to plants, they end up dying. He had made sure they didn’t.
With a sigh, he turned away from the window and went to the kitchen, maybe sustenance was what he needed but he knew what he wanted right now was Sara underneath him and him inside her. He closed his eyes as he remembered every smell and nuance of her body and how he felt inside her and his groan was potent as he felt himself hardening with desire. She was in his blood and there was no way she was getting out; he just did not know what to do about it.
*****
“Girl what did you expect?” Callie stirred sugar in her tea and look at Sara curiously. “You broke her only child’s heart and now you’re back and it’s not as if he has moved on from you; he’s still in hook, line and sinker.”
“Thanks,” Sara said dryly. They had met for lunch at the restaurant close to the bookstore and she was telling Callie of her encounter with Sally Graham yesterday at the store. “And he’s not into me hook, line and sinker.”
Callie looked at her wryly as she sipped her herbal tea. “I have a son and I would tear out a woman’s hair if he hurt my son.”
“You’re making me feel real good right about now,” Sara bit into her burger with relish.
“I live to please,” Callie grinned impishly. “Honey, cut her some slack. She still thinks of David as her baby and that’s not going to end anytime soon. So are you guys are back together?”
“No we’re not!” Sara said hastily; causing Callie to raise her brows.
“You’re protesting too much honey,” Callie told her dryly.
“He has not called me since,” Sara shrugged carelessly. “And I don’t care.”
“Since what?”
“Since we were with each other on Sunday night,” Sara told her avoiding her gaze.
“Ah,” Callie murmured. “No wonder ‘Mommy’ is protective; she probably knows or if she doesn’t, she is there thinking that it’s only a matter of time. Give him time Sara; he probably hates the fact that he’s so weak when it comes to you.”
“I am not going to hurt him again Callie,” Sara said with determination. “I am not that person anymore.”
“It’s not me that needs convincing girl,” Callie told her shrewdly. “It’s David.”
They ate the rest of the meal in relative silence with Callie filling her in on some of the escapades of Benjamin. She went back to the store thoughtfully. She had not told her father of her encounter with Sally Graham and had no intention of doing so; the less people knew the better.
*****
Sara did not see David until Wednesday night at church when they had Bible study and she was careful to sit as far away from him as possible. He had not called her and she had made up her mind not to call him either. She was not going to risk getting rejected. Her father had stayed at the store to do some stocktaking and had urged her to go.
When Bible study was finished, she hurried out to the parking lot. She had to get out of there before he came out. But as she opened her door she heard his voice behind her. “Running away?” he drawled. Sara closed her eyes briefly and slowly turned around to face him. He looked so damned good and she ached for him.
“I need to get home, I have something to do.” She told him stiffly.
“I am sure you do,” he smiled wryly, shoving his hands into the pockets of his black dress pants. His yellow shirt was unbuttoned at the top and she saw just a glimpse of his chest hair.
“I have to leave,” she told him abruptly, turning around to enter her car.
“I wanted to call you,” he told her huskily; his voice stopping her. “I did not know what to say to you or what to do about what I am feeling Sara. I am constantly thinking about you and I don’t know what to do, I needed some space.”
“You got it,” her back was still turned towards him and she stiffened when she felt his touch on her shoulder.
“I am up and down when it comes to you Sara,” he told her wearily. He turned her around to face him. There was a slight breeze and it stirred the hair on her forehead. He pushed it away gently and Sara quivered. “I kid myself that I was over you and I had moved on,” he gave a self-deprecating smile. “But I am not and I don’t know what to do about it; about you.”
“Your mother seems to think I am going to be the death of you,” she told him; her expression sober.
“My mother?” he stared at he
r puzzled. “What does she have to do with us?”
“She came to the store and told me what she thought of me.” Sara said grimly.
“Oh Jesus,” David muttered, running fingers through his hair. “What did you say to her?”
“I just told her that it’s between us,” Sara shrugged. “But I am sure she does not have anything to worry about, does she David?”
“What do you mean by that?” he asked her, his gaze narrowing.
“It means that you don’t want to have anything to do with me.” She told him heatedly. “It means that you probably think I am going to hurt you again and you would not want to make the same mistake twice.”
“Sara stop it,” he told her harshly. “Can you blame me for being cautious?” He gripped her arms; exercising restraint as he saw that there were several members coming outside. “I can’t do this here,” he muttered releasing her. “Come home with me.”
“No,” Sara said firmly, pulling her door open. “I am giving you time and space.” She got in and slammed her door shut, putting the car in reverse and driving away without waiting for his response.
When she got home she switched off the car and sat there. She could not face her father yet and she knew he was waiting up for her; she needed time to think. She closed her eyes and leaned back against the headrest.
She remembered a particularly difficult time in her teen years when she had told her father she did not want to go to school and she wished she could stay home. He had told her that staying away from school was not an option and whatever it was that was bothering her she should discuss it with him and he would try to work it out. That morning she had slammed out of the house and had told him that she hated him and she wished it was him who had gone and not her mom. She had refused to feel guilty about the painful look on his face and had gone off to school in a huff; mad with the world.
She had been sitting outside on one of the school benches during lunch; Callie had gone off in search of Kevin; her current boyfriend so she had sat there just brooding. “What’s wrong?” he'd came and sat beside her, tucking in his long, lanky legs under the bench.