Keeping Her: A Dark Romance (Keep Me Series Book 1)

by Angela Snyder

  After a brief pause, he tells me, "Why would I lie? I have no reason to."

  So he kidnaps women, brings them here to his island. And then, as soon as he sleeps with them, he lets them go. It makes no sense. Why go through all that trouble, unless… "Were all the women virgins?" I ask.

  "Of course," he says as if I should know this already.

  Some of the pieces of this giant puzzle are starting to click in place, but Lucien really is an enigma wrapped inside a riddle. I can't make heads or tails of him or his erratic behavior. I feel like I'm really missing the bigger picture here.

  The promise of going home appeals to me, but I would have to sleep with him to gain my freedom. The thought of having sex with a stranger, especially the man who is responsible for kidnapping me and holding me against my will, makes me physically ill.

  I feel bile rising up the back of my throat, and I have to swallow hard to keep it down. If he stays true to his word, then having sex with him once will get me what I want most in the world right now --- my freedom.

  Could I actually go through with this? Could I actually betray my soon-to-be husband? What would Gio think of me if he learned that I didn't save myself for our wedding night? He probably wouldn't even want me anymore.

  And my father…oh, god, my father would probably kill me…if I don't wind up dead on this island long before that.

  I release a shaky sigh from between my parted lips as I meet the eyes of my kidnapper. "What happens if I don't want to sleep with you?" I ask, my question just above a whisper.

  "Then you don't go home," he says, his tone cold and detached.

  "You would keep me here? Forever?" I ask, disbelieving. Surely, if Lucien doesn't get what he wants, he would eventually let me go. But as soon as the thought rolls around in my mind, I already know my answer before he even speaks.

  "If that's what it took…yes," he answers calmly. "I'm very good at waiting for what I want," he adds. Then he pulls his hands out of his pockets and checks the expensive-looking watch on his wrist, appearing to be bored with me and this little chat of ours, and it makes me furious.

  His eyes meet mine as he says, "The sooner you give me what I paid for, the sooner you can leave. It's that simple."

  And then he turns and leaves, locking me inside this room once again and leaving me spinning with the knowledge that he holds the only key to my freedom.

  * * * * * * *

  THAT EVENING OVER dinner, Lucien's words echo over and over again in my brain, bouncing against my skull and reverberating until it's the only thing I can hear and focus on.

  The sooner you give me what I want, the sooner you can leave.

  But how could I possibly give my virginity to this man? I would remember it for the rest of my life, and that thought alone sends fear straight through me like an icy dagger in my spine. I can't do this.

  Spending all day in solitude with only my thoughts and worst fears keeping me company is starting to make me feel crazy.

  I miss Giovanni.

  I miss my room and my things.

  I even miss my father. Well, maybe only a tiny bit.

  I want to go home. But could I really commit this sickening act with someone I don't even know and deep down loathe? Emily, a girl I knew back in high school, told me that you always remember your first. I most definitely would remember this regardless of it being my first time or not. The circumstances are heinous, and I wouldn't want to remember any of it, but I would be forced to. This is something my mind would play over and over again until I either got psychological help or shoved it so far down into my subconscious that it never resurfaced again.

  Can I actually go through with this?

  At this point…I don't think I have a choice. He's not going to let me go until I give him what he wants, what he paid for. So, maybe I should just get it over with. I can deal with the consequences and mental anguish later.

  "Adeline?"

  His deep timbre brings me back to the present. When I meet his gaze, his dark brows furrow. "Are you not hungry?" he asks.

  I glance down at the chicken dish in front of me. I had been daydreaming for so long that I haven't even taken one bite of it yet.

  Instead of having dinner downstairs in the dining room, my meals have all been in my room the past few days. When Maria and another member of the staff brought in a table and two chairs around dinnertime, I asked her what was going on.

  "You're having dinner with Master Lucien in your room tonight," she had told me.

  I didn't even have to ask her why. I knew why. No one trusted me to not try to run away again…even though I couldn't possibly get away. I know that now.

  And as I glance down at my plastic utensils sans knife, of course, I know that Lucien doesn't trust me either. But if I have any hope of getting off of this island, I need to gain his trust.

  Using my fork, I spear the piece of chicken and tear off a piece before sticking it in my mouth and chewing slowly. The meat is so tender that I don't even need anything stronger than a plastic fork, thankfully.

  I can feel Lucien's stare on me as I eat. He's always staring. Always watching. And it's unnerving.

  With as much resolve as I manage to muster, I meet his stare. "Were you serious about letting the other girls go after you…after you were finished with them?" I ask, almost choking on the words.

  His eyes narrow for a moment before he answers. "Yes. Of course."

  Slowly, I set my fork down and swallow hard, fighting down the urge to vomit. Hanging my head in shame, I whisper, "I'm…I'm ready now."

  I feel a heated blush creeping up my chest and to my face as I feel Lucien's intense stare on me. I expect him to stand up and attack me like a wild animal, but he remains seated and quiet.

  When I finally get the courage to look at him, he has an unreadable expression on his face. He grips the delicate stem of the wine glass in his powerful hand and takes a long swig of the red liquid.

  Every movement he makes is like a choreographed dance --- practiced, thoroughly planned out and perfectly executed. He exudes confidence and power, but there is something about his eyes that make me think he wasn't always this way. I can see the same emotion behind those dark orbs that I see reflected in my own quite often --- pain and fear.

  When he finally sets down his glass, he utters the exact opposite of what I had been expecting him to say.

  "You're not ready yet."

  "W-what?" I falter. Here I was ready to give myself to him, and now he's telling me no? I don't get it. He doesn't think I'm ready yet? I'll never be ready. Surely he has to understand that.

  Feeling embarrassed by throwing myself at him, I shrink into myself, not able to meet his eyes. The promise of going home is flying out of my reach with every passing moment, and I just want this all to end. "Don't you…don't you want me?" I ask, finally getting the courage to meet his stare.

  His dark, broody eyes devour me. "Of course I do," he says confidently. "But you're not ready to give me what I want, Adeline."

  The sound of my name coming from his mouth causes me to shudder. Quickly, I admonish my traitorous body for feeling any sort of attraction towards my kidnapper. It's just wrong. So very wrong.

  After a few more moments of silence, Lucien finally speaks. "Eat," he demands before turning his attention back to his food.

  I watch him for several seconds before stabbing a piece of chicken with my plastic fork. I chew the meat angrily, fuming over what just took place.

  CHAPTER 14

  LUCIEN

  ADELINE SEEMS TO finally understand the rules now. She doesn't appear to be playing dumb anymore, which is a relief.

  And the sooner I get what I want, the sooner I can get her out of my fucking system and the sooner I can send her away.

  She has turned my world nearly upside down in the short time she's been here, and I can't imagine making this a long-term thing.

  "You would keep me here? Forever?"

  Her question makes me grin. I lied
when I said I would keep her here forever, and she was naïve enough to believe me. I like to think that eventually I would grow tired of her games and return her to New York, but a small part of me wonders if that's true.

  I never waited long with the other women, but none of them truly toyed with me or tested me the way Adeline has. Most were in a rush to get our transaction over with. Only one thought she could stay here with me, but she knew the rules. I don't keep used goods.

  Adeline is stalling and proving to be difficult, and I don't know why. I'm not even sure if I really want to know the reasons behind her hesitation.

  I went into her room this morning with the intention of finding out as much as I could about why she's really here and the reason behind her confusion, but then I found myself ignoring the elephant in the room.

  She seemed a little confused and asked some peculiar questions as if she didn't understand what is expected of her here, but I blame that on her handler. Morello clearly didn't explain everything to Adeline that he was supposed to. But considering he emailed me right before the deadline, he was most likely in a rush.

  Criminals only care about money, not about the people they hurt in the process. I know that better than anyone.

  Honestly, I don't want to know why she doesn't want to be here and don't care if she has ultimately changed her mind, because I fucking want her.

  I want her more than my next breath.

  This girl has crawled under my skin and rooted herself deep inside my veins, and I know I can't just let her go without first taking what I want.

  My dark obsession with her frightens me. I've never felt like this before, and I've never craved anything the way I crave Adeline.

  It took every single ounce of my willpower to stay in my seat when she offered herself to me during dinner. I wanted to rip her clothes off and plunge my rock hard cock into her silky depths. I had an insanely feral reaction to that girl. And if she could have heard all the depraved thoughts that raced through my mind when she told me she was ready, she would have run screaming the other way.

  But one look into her eyes after her offer told me everything I needed to know. She was scared. And she certainly didn't want me.

  That instantly calmed the dark beast inside of me from taking her; because for some sick reason, I want Adeline to offer herself to me. I want her to be attracted to me.

  I want her to want me just one-tenth of how much I fucking want her.

  And the idea of such a painstakingly beautiful creature wanting me turns me the fuck on.

  I'm not going to give her a chance to change her mind and back out of our deal. I've already decided I'm going to have her and take what I want.

  Consequences be damned.

  I just hope she doesn't make me wait much longer.

  CHAPTER 15

  ADELINE

  LUCIEN AND I continue to play the cat and mouse game over the next several days. I try to lure him into my web of lies and deceit so that I can go home, but he always resists.

  The more he turns me down, the more I try. And I'm starting to think that maybe this was his goal all along.

  We have dinner in my room again just like we have for the past few evenings, and I decide to try a different approach. Instead of asking when I can go home and basically eating in silence, I'm going to make some small-talk and get to know my captor a little better…even if that should be the furthest thing from my mind right now.

  If I'm being totally honest with myself, Lucien's company hasn't been…awful. He's actually seems really smart, and he is nice to look at. I don't know why I'm trying to find the silver lining in this messed up situation, but at least he's not an old, ugly, bald guy with a pot belly who's trying to rape me every night.

  Things could definitely be worse.

  I need to keep telling myself that if I'm going to survive this.

  "What do you do for a living, Lucien?" I ask him while stabbing a buttered asparagus spear with my plastic fork. Apparently, I'm still not being trusted with metal utensils.

  Lucien dabs his mouth with a linen napkin. "Without getting into too many boring details, I'm a software engineer."

  "So you're good with computers then."

  "Yes."

  "Did you go to college for that?" I'm genuinely interested, and I hope that he can see that.

  "Yes and no. I went to college, but dropped out to pursue other ventures. I was trained by a professional hacker to perform some of the work I need to do."

  I absorb the information slowly. That explains how he was able to kidnap me from so far away. With his money, power and skills, I'm sure his reach is unlimited.

  "I see," I say softly, turning my attention back to my meal. Everything is cooked perfectly and tastes delicious, as usual. Grasping the stem of my wine glass, I bring it to my mouth and sip the cool, red liquid.

  Over the rim of the glass, I can see Lucien watching my every move. His eyes are hooded and focused on my mouth. He does this often while we eat, and it's as if he enjoys watching me do mundane things like talking, eating and drinking.

  It's obvious that he's attracted to me. I would imagine that if he wasn't, he would have never decided to kidnap me. So why is he making it so difficult for me to take him up on his offer so that I can go home?

  I set the glass back down, and his dark chocolate eyes track my movement. He looks devastatingly handsome tonight in a tailored three-piece dark suit and tie. His hair is perfectly styled, like always, and his strong jaw is clean-shaven. I've never seen him having so much as a five-o'clock shadow.

  He exudes perfection, but I wonder if his appearance is by choice or if it was ingrained upon him, like in my case. What I would have given to be able to wear sweatpants around the house and throw my hair up into a messy bun. I was never allowed to look less than flawless at all times, no matter what. My father's rules were harsh, to say the least. And I can't say that I miss them at all.

  If anything, I wish I never had to return to the prison my father calls our home.

  Lucien had mentioned about paying me before he released me, and that's been nagging at the back of my mind. I wonder how much money he's talking about. Maybe I wouldn't have to return back to my prison at all. Maybe I could start a new life with the money.

  "Lucien," I start, and I watch as his eyes darken. "You…you mentioned paying me before letting me go." After he nods in agreement, I shyly ask, "How much?"

  He leans back in his chair and considers my question for a moment. "I'm presuming your handler didn't give you any money?"

  I tilt my head to the side as I try to understand what he means by handler once again. Maybe he means the guys who kidnapped me at gunpoint. I simply shake my head, not giving him a verbal answer since I definitely didn't receive anything other than sheer terror that night.

  He frowns in clear disappointment. "I figured as much." He takes a moment before saying, "One million."

  My eyes widen at his words. He's going to give me…one million dollars to sleep with him? "Why?" The question blurts out of my mouth before I can even stop myself.

  "Why what?"

  "Why would you pay me that much money? Why are you the way you are?" I ask, the questions tumbling out one after another.

  He shakes his head, and I know I won't get an answer out of him. "I just am," he whispers, but I can hear the sadness in his voice.

  "You could have any woman you want," I say, my mouth clearly not waiting for my brain to tell it to shut up.

  My compliment seems to amuse him, though, and I see a ghost of a smile on his mouth before it disappears altogether. I don't think I've ever seen him genuinely smile. And I most certainly have never heard him laugh. He's always so serious…so detached from everyone around him and the outside world.

  My mind races for a reason. There has to be a reason for why he's like this. If I can find out, maybe it will make me…hate him less.

  "You'll never figure it out," he tells me as if reading my thoughts. "No one ever has, and I
don't expect you to now. My past isn't any concern of yours, and I'd like to keep it right where it is…in the past," he says sternly. "It doesn't matter now," he says softly, and I can hear the hurt in his tone.

  But I think he's lying. I think it does matter. Somehow his past shaped him into the man he is today. All of his eccentricities add up to something bigger. Something traumatic happened to him…or maybe someone hurt him.

  Suddenly, I think he and I have a lot more in common than I ever thought. And the urge to comfort him hits me out of the blue.

  Throwing all rational thought out the window, I reach across the table and place my hand over his.

  And then all hell breaks loose.

  Snatching his hand back as if he's just been burnt by my touch, Lucien suddenly stands, knocking his chair over in the process and rattling the table enough that several things spill, including the wine, onto the white, pristine tablecloth. A sheer look of terror is on his face as he takes in the mess, the blood red wine still slowly soaking into the cloth.

  "I'm sorry. I didn't know. I didn't ---."

  Lucien's eyes snap to mine, and the intense anger I see in his gaze causes me to clamp my mouth shut.

  Without another word, he turns and goes to the door. It takes him three tries before he manages to type the right code into the keypad, and he profusely curses through gritted teeth after each failed attempt.

  His entire body shudders in barely controlled anger as he leaves, slamming the door shut behind him.

  I'm standing in the middle of the room with my mouth agape for a very long time after he disappears trying to figure out what the hell I did wrong.

  CHAPTER 16

  LUCIEN

  I LEAVE ADELINE'S room and go straight to my shower --- my sanctuary.

  Panicked breaths spill out from my lungs as I crank on the hot water and strip out of my clothes. I throw them in a pile on the floor, which causes me even more anxiety, but I'm in a fucking hurry to get under the soothing spray of water.