Unbelonging

by Sabrina Stark

  An idiot like me.

  I couldn't go to Lawton's house. I just couldn’t. Not like this.

  I needed to find another solution.

  It wasn't a terribly windy night, but the air was so frigid it barely mattered. Dressed as I was, even the slightest breeze cut through me. The cold burrowed deep into my bones as I hustled to the driveway and tried my car doors. They were locked. Of course.

  And even if my car had been open, what then? I didn't have my car keys, so I couldn't exactly start it up. And without any heat, sleeping in my car really wasn't an option.

  By now, I was cursing out loud, but even the foulest words I knew – and I knew plenty – did nothing to stop the chattering of my teeth.

  It was becoming painfully clear that I had two choices – break one of the Parkers' windows or knock on a neighbor's door. And then what? If I broke a window, I'd have to pay for it. If I knocked on a neighbor's door, would they even answer at this time of night? And if they did, what then?

  Even using their phone, there was nobody I could call, not now. Erika was two hours away, Grandma didn't drive, and neither of my parents were any kind of option. So my alternative was what, exactly? Asking to sleep on some neighbor's sofa until I could get a locksmith to come out tomorrow morning?

  I winced. How much would a locksmith cost? And what would the neighbors tell the Parkers when they returned?

  Shit. No matter how I looked at it, I was beyond screwed. I wrapped my arms as tight around my shivering body as I could, and hurried back to the back patio, where this whole asinine thing had started.

  Stupid or not, I tried the back door again. And again, twisting as hard as I could. When I'd finally accepted there was no way of opening it without a crowbar, I felt the first sing of tears.

  I knew what I had to do. It was the thing that had been rattling around in my brain from almost the very first moment I'd gotten locked out.

  I didn't want to. Out of all my options, it was the least attractive, with the possible exception of freezing to death.

  The thought of facing Lawton, along with Brittney and her friends, was almost too mortifying to contemplate. The humiliation from earlier was still fresh, and the thought of heaping on another dose made me want to throw up in the bushes.

  Stop thinking about it, I told myself. Just march over there and get it over with. You can borrow some clothes, see if he knows a cheap locksmith, whatever. But you can't stand outside forever freezing your ass off.

  I glanced at the back property line. Technically, only a fence separated the properties. But it wasn't your average fence. It was tall, pointy, and iron, with no place to gain a foothold.

  If I were a tiny terrier, I'd simply squeeze between the posts. If I had a death wish, I'd try to climb over. If I wanted to make the evening news, I'd skip the fence and go the long way, by sidewalk.

  And then I remembered the stepladder. I vaguely recalled seeing it behind the Parkers' second garage, hanging off a hook or something. Before I could give it too much thought, I rushed over and yanked the ladder off its hooks.

  Shivering, I dragged the heavy thing across the back lawn and stood it next to the fence. The ladder's top platform didn't quite reach the top, but it got me a whole lot closer.

  As I climbed up, the ladder's cold metal was hell on my bare feet, but I couldn't bring myself to care. On the top step, I stopped and grabbed two closest metal spires. I peered over the fence. The ground looked mulchy. Soft, right? Still, it was looked a lot longer down than I'd anticipated.

  What the hell was I thinking? Maybe I should've walked after all.

  Yeah. In my underpants. Down the street. On a bright moonlit night. Like that was such a good idea.

  Screw it. I took a deep breath and vaulted myself over.

  In my visions, I was agile as a gymnast. In reality, I was as clumsy as a flying octopus – all loose-limbed and floppy as I tumbled onto Lawton's property.

  I hit the ground hard and somehow ended up on my back, staring dully up at the night sky through bare branches and my own confusion.

  I closed my eyes, breathing hard to catch the wind I'd knocked out of me. The ground was cold and damp against my bare arms and legs, and not much better through the thin fabric of my tank top.

  My eyes still clamped shut, I lifted my head and stifled a groan as the change in position made stars shoot underneath my eyelids. I fell back, trying to get my bearings. Just one minute, I told myself even as the cold burrowed deeper through my skin. I was shuddering now, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop.

  When the stars that danced behind my eyelids changed to a steady, bright sensation, I slowly opened my eyes. I groaned again, but this time, it had nothing to do with physical discomfort. The entire backyard was flooded with light, and I heard the sound of muffled footsteps growing louder with every second.

  Damn it.

  Chapter 21

  Working to reclaim my lost coordination, I pressed my palms into the mulch and struggled up to a sitting position, with my bare legs still resting on the ground.

  "Don't move," an unfamiliar male voice said from somewhere behind me.

  Slowly, I turned toward the sound. It hadn't been unfriendly, not exactly. But it hadn't been all warm and fuzzy either.

  Twisting around, my gaze started at the ground and worked my way up. I saw black boots, dark jeans, a dark long-sleeved shirt, and finally, the guy's face. He looked a couple years older than Lawton, but with the same underlying bone structure, even if his hair was a lot shorter.

  He gave me a hard look. "You hurt?"

  Wordlessly, I shook my head.

  He blew out a breath and turned toward the house, calling out, "Lawton! You got another one!"

  "Another what?" I mumbled, pushing against the ground in a feeble attempt to get to my feet. Another girl? Were so many girls going to his party that they were literally falling over the fence?

  A moment later, Lawton appeared behind the guy. He stopped only an instant before rushing to my side. He crouched next to me, his eyes frantic as he looked me over. "You okay? What happened?" He reached for my hand. "God, you're freezing." He was wearing a white long-sleeved T-shirt. "Here," he said, pulling it off and thrusting it at me. "Put this on."

  For once, I didn't argue. With his help, I struggled into the shirt, still warm from his body and tinged with his scent. The shirt was thin, but at least it fell well past my hips. I pulled up my knees, tucking them under the shirt until only my bare toes peeked out.

  Lawton's chest was bare, and his eyes intense as he searched my face. "You okay?" he asked again.

  I nodded. I felt too exposed, not just for my lack of clothes, but for my wet, disheveled hair. As for him – with his bare chest, tousled hair, and dark, probing eyes – he looked glorious. I didn't need a mirror to know that I looked, well, definitely not glorious. I looked down at my smudged knees.

  Lawton turned to the other guy. "What the hell is wrong with you? You just gonna stand there? She's hurt."

  The guy flicked his gaze briefly in my direction. "That's not what she said."

  "Don't listen to her," Lawton said.

  "What?" I said, glaring at both of them.

  The other guy shrugged. "You already gave her your shirt. What do you want me to do? Give her my pants?" He made a move to unbutton his jeans. "Well, if that's what it takes –"

  "No!" I blurted out.

  The guy stopped. "Alright, But hey, I offered." He turned to Lawton. "There. You happy?"

  By now, I wasn't the only one glaring at him. "No," Lawton told him. "You are such a dick. You know that?"

  The guy shrugged. "Pretty much."

  Lawton returned his gaze to me. "Now c'mon, tell us what happened."

  "Nothing," I said. "It's fine. It's just –" I lifted my hand in a vague gesture. "It's just all really stupid." I glanced toward the guy who stood nearby, looking off toward the Parkers' with a cool, calculating gaze, as if searching for something there that didn't
quite belong.

  I knew what didn't belong. Me.

  I glanced at Lawton, and then back at the stranger, wishing he'd go away.

  He didn't.

  "Don't pay any attention to him," Lawton said, squeezing my hand. His voice was very calm, with a barely concealed edge I'd never heard before. "You running from someone?" He glanced toward the Parkers'. "Someone in the house?" His voice darkened. "Want us to take care of it?"

  I shook my head, almost wishing there was some kind of intruder in the house. At least then I wouldn't feel like such an idiot. "No," I mumbled. "It's nothing like that."

  His voice was eerily quiet as he said, "A boyfriend, then?" His trip tightened. "He hurt you?"

  "God no," I said.

  "Hey, Lawton," the other guy said. "Maybe instead of interrogating her, you could bring her inside, hose her off or something."

  I turned to give the guy another dirty look. "Hose me off? Seriously?"

  "Forget him," Lawton said, releasing my hand and reaching out with both arms. "Now c'mon, let's get you inside."

  "No!" I shrunk back. Since he'd miraculously shown up outside, maybe I didn't need to go to his house. Not anymore. Not when I knew who was probably inside. My stomach clenched. Brittney and Amber, and who knows how many other people. Maybe even all girls.

  Lawton stopped in mid-reach. "No?"

  "I mean, thanks. But –" I bit my lip, considering the whole mess. Just inside his property line, we were a long ways from his actual house, and the view of the mansion was mostly blocked by shrubbery, so it's not like I had any real way of knowing what was going on up there.

  "But what?" he asked.

  I glanced toward the house, seeing nothing but greenery, but envisioning throngs of people and a driveway packed with cars. What if Brittney were there? God, the humiliation. I couldn’t stand it, now that I had another option. "I can't."

  His gaze was troubled. "You sure?"

  I nodded. "Maybe we could just sit in your car or something?"

  He stared at me. "My car?"

  "Yeah," I said. "It does have heat, right?"

  "Um, yeah?" he said.

  "And then," I said, "you could just give me a ride. See? Problem solved."

  "A ride?" His eyebrows furrowed. "Where?"

  "Um, well, I'm not sure yet."

  Gently, he reached a hand to my face. His skin felt warm, and I couldn't stop myself from leaning into him, at least a little. His hand felt nice. So nice. What would the rest of him feel like?

  "How's your head?" he asked. "You bump it on the way down?"

  "What?" I pulled back. "No. Of course not." I glanced toward the house. "It's just that, well, you probably have people over, and – "

  "So?" he said. "I'll get rid of 'em."

  I shook my head. "You don't have to do that."

  "No big deal," he said. "It'll take just a minute."

  Again, I glanced in the general direction of the house. "How many are there?"

  He shrugged. "Not that many."

  From a few feet away, the other guy gave a snort of laughter.

  Lawton gave him a dirty look. "Don't you have something better to do?"

  "Well," the guy said, "I figure in a minute, I'll be asking fifty or so people to get the hell out of your house. So 'til then, I figure I might as well take it easy."

  Lawton flicked his head toward the house. "Hey, do that, will ya?"

  "Take it easy?" the guy said.

  "Quit messin' around," Lawton said. "No. Go back to the house, and get rid of 'em. I dunno, use your dick powers for good, not evil, or something."

  "Well, this should be fun," the guy muttered, turning to walk toward the house.

  "Hey!" Lawton called after him. "On your way back, cut the lights, will ya?"

  "Sure thing, Romeo," the guy said without turning around.

  I stared after him. Lawton was right. The guy was a dick. Definitely.

  But Lawton wasn't looking at him. He was looking at me. "Come here," he said, reaching out to gather me in his arms. He wrapped his arms tight around me, and I soaked up the solid warmth of him.

  "You're freezing," he murmured into my hair. "Sure you don't want to head inside now? It's a big house. You wouldn’t have to see anyone, if that's what you're worried about."

  I shook my head. With my luck tonight, I'd run smack-dab into Brittney and become the life of the party, and not in the fun way. Besides, I didn't want to move. Not yet. A part of my brain whispered not ever, but that part was obviously insane. It was best ignored.

  "You sure?" he asked.

  I nodded, burrowing closer to him. Suddenly, I felt like crying, but I didn't know why. It wasn't sadness. Not anymore.

  Chapter 22

  A moment later, the floodlights went off, leaving the backyard once again bathed in dark shadows. For a long time, we were quiet. His skin was warm, and his embrace was steady. I was no longer trembling, at least not from the cold.

  I looked up at him. "You don't really have fifty people over, do you?"

  "Eh, I didn't really count 'em," he said. "Probably not fifty though."

  "So, who are they?" I asked.

  He shrugged. "Friends, acquaintances, that sort of thing."

  The way he talked, it wasn't a houseful of girls looking to get naked with him. I'd love to know for sure. But short of asking him, unless I were willing to ask, or march up there to see for myself, I had no way to really know.

  "Wait a minute," I said, pulling away. "They've been drinking, right? You can't turn a bunch of people out on the streets all boozed up."

  "Don't worry about it," he said.

  I couldn’t help it. I did worry. If something bad happened because I'd stupidly let myself get locked out of the house, I'd never forgive myself. "But what if they hurt someone?" I asked.

  "They won't."

  His confidence annoyed me. "How can you be sure?"

  "I hired drivers," he said. "Always do."

  "Really?"

  "Yeah. A local company. Mostly college kids. It gives me one less thing to worry about." He gave a short laugh. "Plus, it keeps people from trying to crash at my place. It's a lot easier to kick 'em out when I'm paying someone to drive them home."

  "Oh."

  "Although," he said with a laugh, "I don't normally kick them out quite so suddenly."

  Heat rose to my face. "I'm really sorry about all this."

  "Don't be." His voice was quiet in the shadows. "I'm not."

  "You sure?" I gave a nervous laugh. "I literally took the shirt off your back." I swallowed, thinking how nice he looked – and felt – without one. "You're probably wishing I'd just go away already."

  He leaned forward, and I swear, I felt heat emanating off him in waves. "Whatever I'm wishing for," he said, "it's not that."

  My heart fluttered at that certain something I heard in his voice. It was something I hadn't heard before. Not from him, anyway. We'd been together a lot lately, but never like this, and never in the dark. "But you must be freezing," I said.

  "Nope."

  "Liar."

  "No lie here." He wrapped his arms tighter around me to whisper in my ear. "Here a beautiful girl falls from the sky right into my lap, and you think I'm gonna let something as stupid as the temperature bother me?"

  "Beautiful?" I said with a little shiver that had nothing to do with the cold.

  "Don't forget half-naked," said a guy's voice from somewhere in the shadows.

  With a gasp, I pulled away.

  The dick was back.

  Muttering a soft curse, Lawton glared in the general direction of the guy's voice. "Don't you have a bunch of people to get rid of?" he asked.

  Slowly, the guy appeared out of the shadows. "Already done," he said.

  I looked up. "That quick? Seriously?"

  "Yup," the guy said, turning his gaze to Lawton, "but I wouldn’t be expecting any thank you cards, if you know what I mean."

  "I can live with that," Lawton said.

>   "I'm heading out," the guy said. "See ya in an hour." As we watched, he turned away and disappeared silently into the shadows.

  "Well, he's interesting," I said.

  "You don't know the half of it."

  "Where's he going, anyway?"

  Lawton shrugged. "Who knows."

  "Is he like a security guy or something?"

  "It's the 'or something'."

  "You're not gonna tell me?" I said.

  He turned his dark gaze on me, his eyes probing. "You not gonna tell me what happened tonight?"

  I considered the decisions that had brought me here. Every one of them had seemed logical at the time. The bath, the chase with Chucky, the dash to the garbage-bin, the climb over the fence. But now, looking back, I felt like a world-class moron.

  "Honestly?" I said. "It's pretty boring."

  "Uh-huh," Lawton said, cradling me in his arms, as he got to his feet. "Boring. Got it. Now, c'mon, let's get you inside."

  Soon, he was carrying me toward his house. His body felt warm and hard, and so very strong. Funny to think he was strong enough to beat someone to a bloody pulp – and strong enough to carry a stupid girl across his yard without breaking a sweat.

  For the briefest moment, I almost forgot I was a dirty, damp mess. Eventually, in the light of his house, there'd be no shadows to disguise my appearance. But until then, I pressed into him, relishing the feel of his skin against mine, and his muscles moving with each step he took across the quiet yard.

  For that brief moment, I didn't care that I'd just gotten fired, or quit, or whatever. And I didn't care that I had no good plan for getting back inside the Parkers' house. And I didn't care that I'd apparently just gotten fifty people kicked out of some party that I hadn't even been invited to.

  I didn't care about any of it, and for once, it felt absolutely terrific.

  Chapter 23

  Crossing the back lawn, I closed my eyes and snuggled into his warmth as he carried us forward at a sure, steady pace. If the cold bothered him, he gave no sign. For one heavenly minute, I savored his steady embrace. Finally, I said the thing that needed saying. "You know, I can walk."