SEE YOU AT THE TOP

by Zig Ziglar

  But let’s return to the story of how you acquire the habit of smoking. Even though your body bravely, and in some cases strongly resisted smoking, you continued to force cigarettes upon your system. Your body then made some adjustments. In effect, it said, “Okay, I’ll do it, but I won’t like it.” You then said, “That doesn’t matter, you’re going to do it anyway.” Later on your body made further concessions and said, “I don’t know why I objected, actually, it’s not that bad.” Still later, your body adjusted until you actually enjoyed smoking. At that point you told your friends you smoked because you enjoyed it. After all, you assured them, a person needed to do some things he enjoyed. You even told them you could quit any time you wanted to because you had already quit a dozen times so it wasn’t really a “habit.” Finally, your body made its final adjustment when it acquired the total habit and demanded that cigarette.

  THEN—THE HABIT GETS YOU

  This is evidenced by the number of people who have nicotine “fits” from the time they run out of cigarettes until they can buy, beg, borrow, or steal another. I’ve seen an otherwise healthy 200-pound man reduced to a quivering mass by a craving for a cigarette that weighed less than 1/10th of an ounce. It almost makes me wish we were creatures of logic instead of creatures of emotion, doesn’t it you?

  Yes, habits are funny things. What’s funny, or rather tragic, is that bad habits are so predictable and avoidable. Despite this, there are people by the millions who insist on acquiring habits that are bad, expensive, and create problems. In the case of tobacco, the user discovers the chains of habit are too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken. The habit they weren’t going to get, got them.

  Morality or immorality are habits. Both are “caught” more than taught. A completely moral person can become immoral in a gradual process that is almost completely predictable. The “good” boy or girl is accidentally or inadvertently exposed to a situation he or she abhors and finds distasteful. At a party, banquet, or social function, he might be drawn into a group that believes in free love, trial marriage, drug experimentation, wife swapping, drunkenness, etc. Although there is initial objection and complete disapproval of the actions, if some member of the group appeals in some way to this individual, look out. A relationship could be in the formative stage. If further contact is made, the natural turn of events will lead the person who was originally quite offended into more and more associations with the individuals they have met as well as others of the same persuasion (birds of a feather do flock together).

  The mind is a marvelously flexible mechanism that can do a remarkable amount of adjusting and rationalizing. The sins or immoral acts that were so abhorred originally become less objectionable after a few additional exposures where “tolerance” is advocated as “the” most desirable virtue. Tolerance gradually changes to acceptance, particularly if a genuine attachment is formed with the individuals involved. Acceptance moves to tacit approval, which changes into approval and then involvement. Throughout the process, the rationalization procedure has been going full speed ahead.

  The same procedure pertains to pornography. The effect of pornography was hit hard by Professor Alexander M. Bickel of Yale University Law School. In commenting on the effect of pornography he stated, “What it does produce is a moral atmosphere, and the moral atmosphere is the ultimate regulator of conduct. If something can be said, if it can be shown, if it is obviously permitted by society, then that society begins to think it is do-able.”

  ONE BITE AT A TIME

  Eating too much is a habit, and for many people it has become so deeply ingrained they are unaware of the amount of food they consume. This might have been started by well-meaning but misinformed parents who thought that loving a child meant giving him whatever he wanted at the moment. My age group produced a number of “fatties” because the parents of my generation had a hard struggle getting enough to eat, and food represented security. They also felt it was sinful to waste food. As a result, numerous parents admonished their children to “clean the plate.” This extra food on a regular basis resulted in a weight gain of a few ounces each week. Gain one ounce per day and you’ll gain nearly 23 pounds for the year. An ounce isn’t much, but 23 pounds is a lot.

  If you have a weight problem, you didn’t acquire it by overeating yesterday, and you’re not going to solve it by starving tomorrow. You added your excess weight one bite at a time until obesity became a fact. With rare exception, you simply ate too much too often. You’ll solve the problem the way you created it—one bite at a time.

  For many, it’s a slightly different problem. Some people are so taste and pleasure oriented, they often acquire destructive eating habits with a high concentration of starches and sweets. Combine this with a “no exercise” way of life, and weight piles on even faster than an ounce a day.

  If too much weight is a problem for you, let me urge you to turn back to the segment on Goals and review what you need to do to get rid of the weight.

  THE WISEST—AND THE STRONGEST—FELL

  We’re kidding ourselves if we think we won’t be influenced by associating with the wrong crowd. Solomon, the wisest man who ever lived, married Philistine wives who worshipped idols. Guess what? It wasn’t long before his mind and judgment were no match for the evil that surrounded him. He, too, began to worship idols. Samson was the strongest man who ever lived, but under constant sexual pressure from Delilah, he succumbed to her wishes and told the secret which reduced him to blindness and slavery. Proverbs 22:24-27 is crystal clear about what the wrong association does; so is the Apostle Paul, when he writes, “Be not deceived; bad companions corrupt good morals” (1 Cor. 15:33 A.S.V.).

  The best example I can give is that of the “accent” in speech. I’m certain you have observed that when a Southern boy or girl moves North, in a matter of months he or she will acquire an accent. If a Northern boy or girl moves South, in a matter of months we will have him or her talking normally. You adjust to, are influenced by, and become part of what you associate with.

  One day when my son was 12 years old, he asked for lunch money. I tried to “sell” him on the idea of skipping a high carbohydrate lunch and eating a nutritious protein bar. He was pretty firm in his refusal, so I pointed out that I was doing what I was trying to get him to do. His reply pretty well said it all, “Yeah, Dad, but you’re not around a bunch of kids eating hamburgers.” That same “peer group pressure” plays a dramatic role in influencing youngsters on drugs, dress, sex, violence, etc.

  Not only do we acquire the characteristics of the people we associate with on a steady basis, but we also become immune and desensitized to the noise and odors of our environment. People who live in paper mill towns, or close to fertilizer plants, grow so accustomed to the odors they never notice them until someone else points them out. As a teenager during World War II, I lived just 10 miles from the oil field and trains came by in an endless stream 24 hours a day. We grew so accustomed to the noise and the shaking of the house, which was only about 30 yards from the railroad tracks, that we were completely unaware of their passing—unless one stopped. Then the silence woke us up.

  These examples emphasize that when you are around a negative, evil, or destructive environment long enough you will go from objection to tolerance, from tolerance to acceptance, and from acceptance to participation and even enjoyment. It makes no difference how little it was to start with, it will grow.

  MY AMBITION—TO BE A HEROIN ADDICT

  Drugs, including alcohol, represent the greatest single threat our youth have ever faced. It has been my lot to be involved in the war on drugs these past few years. During my involvement, I’ve never talked with a drug addict who admitted he or she started out to become an addict. Nor have I ever talked to a youngster on “pot” who told me that “pot” was just his starting point for moving to the “hard stuff.” I’ve never had anyone lay out a schedule of how he was going to move first to “hashish,” then to “speed,” “cocaine,” and finall
y to “heroin.” I’ve never heard anyone ridicule “pot” as “kid stuff” or just a phase he was going through. Never once have I had a youngster say he was ambitious to move from the “soft stuff” to “H,” or crack cocaine. In case after case the kids stress they are “too smart” for that kind of stuff. They know what it will do to them, and they vow they will never, never get hooked.

  These are famous last words, because just as the dying flicker of a match can start a forest fire, the all-consuming craving for “another fix”—or one more drink—is generally started by the lighting of that first “joint” of marijuana, or taking that first drink, many months earlier. Habit is a cable; we weave a thread of it each day until it becomes too

  strong to break. Then the strength of that habit cable takes us to the top—or ties us to the bottom, depending on whether it is a good habit or a bad one.

  DON’T SPEND YOU

  Most avid hockey fans recognize the name of Derrick Sanderson, even though it has been several years since he played the game. He was a superstar—a player with incredible skills and physical talents combined with a charisma which enabled him to earn millions of dollars. Unfortunately, Derrick got involved in drugs and fast living. When he tipped, it was with automobiles and hundred-dollar bills. Soon his money and his skills were gone and he was sent back to the minor leagues. Later he retired at an age when he should have been at the peak of his game. During his brief stint in the minors a reporter asked if he regretted spending his money. Derrick candidly replied, “No, I don’t regret spending any part of my money, but I do deeply regret spending a part of Derrick Sanderson.”

  It’s tragic when anyone spends a portion of himself, but as I have said before and will say again, nobody starts out to become a drug addict or alcoholic. There are still many facts we don’t have about drugs, including marijuana. However, as the evidence is gathered, it becomes more and more obvious that its use is fraught with peril. Evidence is solid that it affects judgment, multiplies the incidence of birth defects, reduces self-awareness, and creates the illusion of greater insight and emotional maturity. Many times the users thought they were getting “smarter,” but no one else did. Marijuana also diminishes sex drive, distorts distance, and actually destroys cells while creating apathy among habitual users.

  Occasionally, a youngster might be warned by a real friend who understands the risk involved in using marijuana, but the changes brought about by its use are so subtle the user sees no danger and detects no change. He or she believes that smoking pot is harmless. But as Neil Soloman, M.D., points out, this belief is as widespread as it is wrong. It’s true that pot is harmless by comparison with, say heroin, but by the same logic it’s also all right to cut off a toe compared to slitting your throat. Many a user will go to great lengths to point out that it’s “his life,” and if it hurts anyone, it will be no one but him. Besides, it’s fun and he is now accepted as “one of the gang.” Even if this were entirely true, it is still sad to watch young people cripple and often destroy their lives.

  From a tragic personal experience, however, I can tell you that pot smokers, like drinkers, often hurt and destroy people other than themselves. An older brother and his wife lost their youngest son, an outstanding young man of 25, when he was hit by a car driven by a youngster high on pot who misjudged his speed and the distance involved. The grief of the parents and loved ones is indescribable, and the recurring guilt feelings of the boy responsible for the tragedy will undoubtedly have a sobering effect on anyone familiar with the family. I pray that those who contend that pot is harmless will never have to deal with just one grief-stricken member of an innocent victim’s family. Many, many times the individual involved with pot grows bolder and indulges more frequently. Finally, he is “hooked” and progressing on the road to the big “H.” That is the route most hard core addicts take, according to the world’s foremost authorities—the hard core addicts themselves.

  TIME TO MOVE UP

  There’s a funny thing about the use of marijuana. After a time, one member of the group suggests smoking “pot” is kid stuff. What they should do is try “hashish,” “speed,” or something with a bigger kick. They point out, “If you think ‘pot’ is fun, you should try . . . !” They easily “sell the idea” because the group is already involved. Once they’ve justified the habit in their own minds, it’s easy to move from that first step and you can bet your last nickel the source of supply for “pot” will have access to the hard stuff.

  You can also bet if your friends or loved ones are involved, they weren’t originally involved by a sinister, underworld character. They were “sold” by someone they knew and trusted. When a person gets involved in an illegal activity, he figures it will lessen his own guilt if he can persuade others to join him. With the exception of alcohol, marijuana is the most dangerous of all the drugs. Without exception, every hard core addict I ever met told me he started on “pot or cigarettes.” My associates in the drug war make the same observation.

  Dr. Forest Tennant, arguably the number one drug authority in America, says that “pot” is the first illegal drug most addicts start with, but that tobacco and alcohol are the first or “entrance drug” for virtually every hard core addict. He unequivocally states that when we solve the smoking problem we will have solved most of the hard core drug problem.

  Authorities are in near-unanimous agreement that marijuana is not physically addictive. However, in Chairman Claude Pepper’s Congressional Investigation of marijuana, he was confronted with an uneducated youngster who asked, “If marijuana is not habit forming, how come I can’t quit?” The committee never answered him. Psychologists say “pot” is not habit-forming physiologically, but it is psychologically. It’s sad to play this word game with kids because it is tougher, much tougher, to shake a mental habit than a physical one. Arrested heroin addicts (there is no such thing as a “former” addict any more than there is a “former” alcoholic) fight the mental addiction to heroin many years after all their physical needs have passed. Some never get over a craving for a “fix.”

  UNFORTUNATELY—IT’S PLEASANT

  There is no hangover or physical discomfort that follows a marijuana “high.” Since the smoker had a good feeling, was relaxed and at peace, he can see no reason “why not,” and he’s on the way—down. The changes “pot” makes are so gradual the user is almost never aware of them. The changes are so slight you waste your breath mentioning them, because the user couldn’t and wouldn’t believe you. The people who see him every day aren’t even aware of the change. Generally speaking, it’s the friend or relative who hasn’t seen him for some time who first notices the change.

  Originally, when a youngster starts on this “habit,” the cost is small and can be managed out of the regular allowance. When users get into the drug scene on a more regular basis, however, more money is required. At that point, money starts disappearing from the top of the dresser, Mom’s change purse, or Dad’s wallet. As the habit grows, the need for money and the skill for acquiring it grows. Now the prospective addict starts taking more money and selling items from the house that are not likely to be missed. As the habit grows, the addict moves his petty thievery to the local stores. He sells those stolen items through a “fence” at a price roughly 10 to 20% of the true market value. At this price, some ingenuity is required to support even a small habit.

  The deeper and more involved the habit becomes, the greater the thievery. The move into the hard drugs, involving the regular use of things like “speed,” “LSD,” “heroin,” “cocaine,” and others, increases the thievery at an alarming rate. The greater the habit, the greater the cost, until eventually the addict has to steal on virtually a full-time basis. Ultimately this reaches the limit. Girls frequently turn to prostitution and the boys to procuring. The next step comes when involvement is so heavy the addict can’t raise enough money to support the habit. At that point, the nice boy or girl across the street who started out puffing on a cigarette to be “one of t
he gang” before moving on to “just smoking pot,” becomes a “pusher.” None of these kids would have believed it was possible or that it could happen to them.

  KILLED—WHILE ON A TRIP

  There are two things we need to understand about drugs. First, there is no way to predict what the addict will do while under the influence of drugs. Second, there is no way to predict what he will do to satisfy the craving once he has the habit. There are cases where addicts have done everything from selling their own sisters and wives into prostitution to killing their own relatives to acquire money to support the habit. One boy literally killed his friend and ate his heart while on a hallucinogenic trip.

  When an addict becomes a pusher, he is in a unique position. In most cases he can’t sell his product to established users, so he has to “create” a new market. The new “pusher” would literally get his throat cut if he attempted to sell another pusher’s “customers,” so he carves out his own territory. This creates a vicious cycle because the new pusher must get more people started on the same habit he himself took up so casually. Oh, what a price to pay just to be “one of the gang.”

  JUST WHO IS RESPONSIBLE?

  This way of life has led my generation to be highly critical of the younger generation. We’ve said some pretty hard things about immoral, irresponsible kids and accused them of being the “worst” generation in history. There’s a good chance we were right, but unfortunately we made the mistake of focusing on the problem while largely ignoring the cause of the problem. However, as I did my research for this book, it became increasingly evident that youthful behavior was often the result of following adult examples and falling victim to the temptations made possible by an older generation.

  By now you have a clear picture of what I believe, so I won’t do any re-hashing other than to remind you that, “as ye sow, so also shall ye reap.” Ideas and suggestions are planted by television, videos, video games, the Internet (which has surpassed both the home and the church as the greatest influence in America today), theaters, radios, books, magazines, and the conduct of people in general. Obviously, most TV stations, newspapers, massage parlors, movie houses, drug import businesses, drinking and gambling establishments, etc., are not owned by teenagers. However, the victims are often youthful and the results are as devastating to them as the profit to the owners is enormous. Today, when I look at a younger generation in trouble, I am forced to admit that my peer group, my generation, stands guilty with the youth and in many ways for the youth.