A lovely middle-aged GP comes to examine me at the lodge and shakes her head. “You’re severely dehydrated. You need to be in hospital on an IV.”
“Okay. Can you tell Ariel for me?”
She smiles. “Is that your employer?”
I nod weakly.
“Sure. I’ll write down my official recommendation and give it to her on my way out.”
“Thanks.”
After that, I’m vaguely aware of being assisted into a car and given a plastic container to hold in case I throw up before we arrive at the hospital. At the other end, I’m unceremoniously plopped into a wheelchair and taken through to a ward. Someone lifts me onto a bed, and a couple of medical professionals hover around me, checking my blood pressure and temperature. A needle is inserted into my arm and then I’m finally left alone.
I can relax.
***
Along with liking airline food, I think I’m in the minority when I say I also don’t mind hospitals. I never understood why people are so freaked out by them—apart from the fact that, yes, some people die there. But most people are born in one, and I’m sure the percentage of people who leave all healed after an injury or illness is much higher than the ones who don’t.
So, although I’m feeling weak and probably a little closer to the death end of the spectrum than I would prefer, I am quite content to be in this unfamiliar hospital in the middle of Austria.
It would be nice to know someone here, though. Ariel certainly wasn’t going to come and keep me company, and all the other producers are playing catch-up after losing the first day of filming.
I daydream of Patrick and our week in Uruguay. I wonder if I imagined the whole thing now. I haven’t heard from him since he called to check on me that first morning.
I still have doubts about the power imbalance in our relationship, both in a professional and personal capacity, but so far it doesn’t seem to have been a problem. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever felt more powerful than the nights we were together.
I get out my phone and type him a message.
Hey. Just thought I’d let you know I’m at the hospital being treated for dehydration. Should be OK in a day or two, though.
I want to make it sound more personal, but since this will be the first time we’ve communicated in several days, I don’t want to come on too strong.
While I wait for him to reply, I decide to call Jules. I miss him a lot. We’ve exchanged a couple of messages via Instagram since I’ve left, but I haven’t had a chance to call and talk to him properly. I check the time difference and see that he should be awake, but not at work yet.
He answers straight away.
“Oh my God, honey! It’s been forever! Where are you calling from?”
“A hospital in Austria,” I answer literally.
“What? Are you okay?”
“I will be. I caught a nasty bug and it kind of knocked me around.”
“You poor thing! I’m sorry to hear that. But otherwise, how’s it all going?”
“Interesting. But first, how are you? What am I missing back in Oz?”
“Nothing. It’s so dead here at the moment. The new girl is all right, but we don’t have the same dynamic I had with you.”
“Aw, you’re so sweet.”
“At least I don’t have to deal with Ariel right now. I forget how peaceful it is at the studio when she’s not here. How are you coping with the dragon lady?”
“Actually, I think we kind of get each other,” I admit.
“No! You’re besties with Ariel now?”
I laugh. “I wouldn’t exactly say we’re besties. But I understand her motivation. She’s doing a hard job.”
“Wow. I don’t know what’s been happening since you left the country, but clearly I’m missing out on all the gossip. Actually, speaking of gossip, I heard Patrick came out to check on filming. Did you see him?”
“I did,” I confirm with a big smile on my face.
“Okay, spill. You’re sleeping together now, aren’t you?”
“I’m not saying.”
“Well, that means you definitely are. Oh my God, Lauren! Schmoozing Ariel and shagging Patrick. I think I hate you.”
“You don’t hate me. But that does not confirm I am sleeping with Patrick. And please don’t tell anyone I am.”
“Honey, what do you take me for? So, I suppose you haven’t spoken to Finn?”
“Not since I was in Tofino. Why?”
“Oh, no reason. He just seems a bit melancholy. I think he misses you.”
“Um, I think you’ll find he misses his girlfriend. He asked me if Tofino was a good place to propose.”
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I know that must have been a bit disappointing to hear. Wait, so is that when you went out and shagged Patrick?”
I feel my face heat up, and I’m glad I’m talking to Jules on the phone and not in person.
“No. And stop saying that. You’re not at the office now, are you?”
“Nope. But I’m just about to get in the car, so I’ll have to go. Unless you want to tell me anything else?”
“No. I have no other news. Well, nothing that can’t wait until another day. I’m sorry I haven’t called until now. I’ll try and make more of an effort from now on.”
“It’s okay. I know you’ve got a busy schedule. Oh, before I forget, I usually go back to Queensland for Christmas, but my folks are flying to Europe this year. If you’re staying in Sydney, do you want to do something together?”
“That would be lovely. I might see if Josh is around, but my plans will definitely include you.”
“Excellent. All right, I have to go now. Mwah! I’ll talk to you again soon!”
“Bye!”
I hang up and smile. I’m so glad I phoned Jules.
Patrick hasn’t written back yet, so I look at my phone for a second and then make a decision. I’m going to contact Finn.
Hey. How’s Oz? I’m getting to experience the beauty of…an Austrian hospital.
My phone beeps almost immediately.
What happened? Are you OK? Is there anything I can do to help?
Just a little dehydration thanks to a nasty bug I picked up in Obertauern. I should be fine in a couple of days.
Are you going to come home then?
I don’t know yet.
Actually, I hadn’t thought about that. We still have Laos, Antarctica and Ghana left on the trip and I would hate to miss them. But I wonder if my immune system would be strong enough to deal with more foreign bugs, especially when we’ll be doing so much travelling in between.
Can you work from Oz?
Maybe. I’ll have to run it by the team.
Ariel could either love or hate the idea. She might like to feel as if she’s regained full control of the show, but she might also resent not having the extra set of hands to do stuff.
I hate that the thought even crosses my mind, but it would be nice to be back in the same city as Patrick. It would give us a chance to figure out what kind of relationship we’re going to have in the real world.
I hope you feel better soon. And text me day or night if you need anything.
Thanks. You’re a pretty good roomie.
Right back at ya.
Sigh. I’d kind of pushed Finn to the back of my mind since he’d talked about proposing to Emma, and then when things started heating up with Patrick, but I can’t help thinking again how much I like him. I know from reading the MultiDate forums that a lot of viewers can’t understand how the contestants could fall in love with more than one person, but I’ve always given them the benefit of the doubt. And right now proves I was right to withhold judgement. Not that I’m in love with two men. But I definitely really like both of them. It’s just a shame one has a girlfriend, and the other is my boss.
My phone beeps again. Patrick. Finally.
Sorry to hear you’re ill. Get well soon and I’ll talk to you when you’re back in action.
Jeez. Wha
t’s that all about? He might as well have been texting his aunt. Could he have been any more impersonal?
A tiny part of me starts to wonder if maybe I made a mistake getting involved with Patrick James.
***
I stay in the hospital for two nights. By the start of the third day, I am so bored, I beg the staff to release me if it’s safe to do so. They oblige, but advise that I should take it easy for the next few weeks.
After talking with Ariel, we agree that I should go home and work remotely for the rest of the trip. She even hires someone to drive me to the airport.
I fly home via Abu Dhabi. The travelling takes its toll on me, and I feel almost as bad as I did before I checked into the hospital.
When I finally unlock the door to my house and drag myself into the living room, I am ready to sleep for two days straight.
Pearl Jam’s Vitalogy is pumping through the stereo, so Finn doesn’t notice me until I’m only a few feet away.
He jumps up with a big smile. “Hey! I didn’t know you had decided to come home!”
“It was all kind of sudden. Sorry, I should have texted, but I’ve been a bit delirious since I left Austria.”
“No need to explain. How are you feeling now? I’m sorry to say it, but you don’t look great.”
“Yeah, I definitely need to lie down. I might have a quick shower first.”
“I’ll make you a cup of tea and something to eat.”
“You don’t have to do that,” I protest weakly. To be honest, I would really like to have someone look after me.
“I want to. Go on. Do whatever you have to.”
That urge to hug him is back, but I refrain. I don’t want to make things uncomfortable.
I’m just about to go to my bedroom to change, when I see a huge bouquet of lilies on our dining table.
“Did someone send you flowers?” I ask Finn.
“Oh, I forgot about those. No, they’re for you. I didn’t open the card, and I didn’t know when you were coming back, so I just left them out here.”
I go over and pick up the small card.
I hope you’re feeling better. Call me when you get back.
Patrick.
Ariel must have told him I was coming home, because I didn’t. I was sort of annoyed about the impersonal nature of his last text, and this card isn’t much better. What on earth is going through that man’s head?
My poor brain is not functioning well enough right now to analyse this kind of thing. I tuck the card back under the flowers and resume my plan to have a shower.
I feel a little more normal after letting the warm water wash over my face and body. I curl up on the couch in a pair of yoga pants and a comfy t-shirt and sip the tea Finn made me. He hands me a small bowl of rice pudding.
“I made it last night,” he explains.
“You’re the best,” I say gratefully.
“So, I know it didn’t end the way you wanted, but what did you think of the ‘every continent’ idea?”
“Actually, after the initial shock of so much travel, it was a lot of fun. I think you and Emma will really enjoy it.”
“Hmm…” he says thoughtfully.
“What?”
“Oh, nothing.”
“Hey, I wanted to thank you for putting me on to Murakami. I’m a little bit obsessed with his books now.”
He smiles widely. “Really? I don’t remember us talking about him.”
I point to the bookshelf. “I noticed when I moved in.”
“Ah. So what’s your favourite?”
“I think Norwegian Wood, but mostly for the descriptions of the landscape.”
“Have you read 1Q84 yet?”
“No. Good?”
“Probably the best. In my opinion.”
“I’ll have to try that one next.”
I eat the rice pudding and we sit in amiable silence. I want to ask Finn about his plans to propose to Emma, but I can’t do it. With Patrick acting all distant, it’s nice to pretend I’m important to at least one other man for a little while.
I yawn and put my bowl down. “I don’t know if I even have the energy to walk to my room.”
“We can just hang out here for a bit if you like? Watch something on Netflix?”
“Sounds good,” I say sleepily.
He switches on the TV and then disappears for a moment, returning with a lightweight blanket. He drapes it over me and gently smooths it out.
I look up at him. He looks back with an expression I would definitely wonder about if he wasn’t about to get engaged to someone else. But the moment only lasts a second. He lets me have the whole couch and sits on the floor. I can’t see his face anymore.
That’s probably a good thing.
THIRTY
It’s almost an entire week before I hear from Patrick. After checking in with Ariel, we agreed I would rest for the first week and then go back to the studio for the last two, where I would then visit the evicted couples and interview them about their experience since leaving the show. Ariel is going to send a cameraman to work with me.
In the meantime, I lie around on the couch binge-watching How I Met Your Mother (even though I’ve already watched every episode) and get waited on by Finn when he’s not at work.
I’m annoyed, because Finn is the one acting like my boyfriend—in the caring for you while you’re sick way—not the romantic way—and Patrick is God knows where. I refuse to call him. He knows I’m home, so he can make the next move.
On Friday night, the man finally makes an appearance. I’m just settling in for the evening, and Finn has gone to the gym. I’m about to switch on the TV, when the doorbell rings. I’m already in my PJs, so I grab a throw from the couch and wrap it around my shoulders.
He’s standing on the other side of the glass door, giving me the same look from the time he forgot his swiper at the studio.
I slowly walk towards the door, trying to collect my thoughts.
“Hi,” he says softly when I open it.
“Hi.”
“Are you feeling better?”
“Yes, thanks.”
“Do you mind if I come in? I’m not interrupting anything?”
“Uh, no. Come on through.”
I pad back down the hall, feeling Patrick’s eyes on me the whole time.
“Nice place,” he says when I usher him over to the couch.
“Thanks.”
We sit down. I keep the throw wrapped around me. It feels strange having Patrick sitting in my house. It was all well and good to have a fling in Uruguay, but that wasn’t reality. This is.
“I want to apologise,” he starts.
“For?” I prompt.
“For not being there for you when you were sick.”
“Okay.”
“I want you to know I normally hold myself to a much higher standard than that. But you…oh God, Lauren. I’m such a mess.”
I won’t let him off that easily. “In what way?”
He slides the throw off my shoulders and plants a row of feathery kisses along my collarbone. I want to push him away, but I can’t. My skin gets all goosebumpy.
“Work has been a nightmare…oh, and you’ll appreciate this. My mum is trying to have another go at claiming a share of Dad’s empire. I feel like I’m being pulled in a million different directions at once. And it’s crazy that the one person I know will make me feel better is also the one I don’t want to have see me like this.”
“Um, have you forgotten the times you saw me when I didn’t exactly have it together? What about after my run-in with a molten tub of wax? Or the time I fell asleep on your private plane?”
“God, I wanted to kiss you so bad that night on the plane. I was cursing Phil for giving you such strong painkillers.”
I giggle. “You wanted to kiss me then?”
“I’ve always wanted to kiss you. You know that. And when I first saw you at the phone store. You were so cute and unaware that I was trying to ask for your number that day.
”
My eyes widen in mock surprise. “So you didn’t just want the store’s number?”
“Of course not. But then that prick Cam was watching me like a hawk and I didn’t want to get you in trouble.”
“He already thought you were chatting me up.”
“Anybody could have seen that. Except you. But it made me want you even more.”
“So, what? You would have found another excuse to see me?”
“Well, if I had been staying in Brisbane longer, I would have. But I had to get back to Sydney. And then you appeared like magic in my studio a week later. I couldn’t believe my luck.”
“So what would you have done if I had noticed you were trying to ask me out at the phone store? Just used me for one night and then ditched me?”
“Of course not. As you already know, I do a lot of travelling. A little more to see you would not have been an inconvenience. Anyway, there’s no use wondering about what might have been when it worked out so much better this way.”
“Hmm…”
Patrick pushes the strap of my top aside and kisses his way down my chest.
I almost get lost in the moment, but then something else occurs to me.
“Did you just give me that consulting job because you wanted to sleep with me?”
He laughs. “No! Is that what you think? That I was so desperate to impress you that I promoted you?”
“Well…”
“Lauren, you need to think higher of yourself. And me. I gave you the job despite my feelings for you.”
“Okay. You can keep doing what you were doing. Oh, but first I want you to acknowledge that it was kind of a douchey move to write such impersonal texts and cards to me when I was sick.”
He pulls my top off completely and covers one of my nipples with his mouth, sucking gently.
“Let me show you how sorry I am right now.”
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