Enlightened Love

by Shara Lanel

  A voice from a TV commercial caught her attention. “Have you seen this woman? If so call…” Her eyes jerked to the television and she stared in shock. A number appeared at the top of the screen, Jason’s office number, and the picture on the screen was her own smiling face, highlighted hair glistening gold in the sunlight. She recognized the photo. It was from her graduation at Stanford. She’d held her diploma in one hand and wrapped her arm around a female classmate with the other. What was her name? Sally, she recalled. Jason had been tapping his foot impatiently near his rental car as the camera snapped.

  At the bottom of the screen it read, “$25,000 cash reward for information.”

  “Oh, my God!” Feeling sick, Kerry covered her mouth. She concentrated on breathing deeply until she felt normal again. By then, the soap opera had returned.

  Panic gripped Kerry. Anyone could have seen that commercial—Evan, Lydia, anyone from the restaurants she’d applied at. She had to leave. Now. Someone would call Jason. That was a lot of money in most people’s eyes, and they only asked for information. All anyone would have to do is say they’d seen her.

  Would Jason come for her in person or send her father? It didn’t matter. The result would be the same. She’d either be married to Jason and sworn to silence, waiting for him to do to her what he’d done to that prostitute, or he’d kill her when he found her, knowing she could expose him to the police or the media or to his own family.

  “I should go to the police.” But there’s no body, no proof. What if they thought she was an accomplice? Jason was perfectly capable of twisting a story until he looked good and she looked incompetent. He could surely make her look guilty as well.

  Too much thought. She could think later, after she’d hidden.

  She ran upstairs and shoved her clothes back into her duffel, then sat on the bed to tie on her Keds. Realizing she wore Rick’s shirt with her jeans, Kerry rubbed her hand down the cotton fabric and inhaled the spicy scent. Would he mind if she kept it? Hugging herself and closing her eyes, she knew that she needed to keep some memento of her time here.

  She finished tying the shoes and slung the bag over her shoulder. She’d neatly folded three of her ratty shirts and placed them in the wastebasket. She needed to carry less this time to avoid a repeat of the heatstroke.

  Downstairs, she filled a bottle with water and debated whether to leave Rick a note to tell him how grateful she was for his help, how much she enjoyed his company and how wonderful last night had been. In the end, she just scrawled the words “Thanks, Kerry” on the notepad by the phone.

  She left through the back door, carefully locking it. Lifting her duffel, she headed down the alley and followed a zigzagging path to Harrison Street at the edge of VCU. Hot and tired, she followed a group of chatty girls into the student commons, figuring she looked young enough to blend. Hide in plain sight, she thought, at least until evening brought a break in the heat.

  Then leave. Get the hell out of Dodge.

  But that meant no chance to ever see Rick again.

  You can’t risk seeing him again.

  But it was too dangerous to travel at night, right? Well, that was her justification for staying in town. She’d seek out Harold, the man from the park, and find a place to sleep. She’d be safe enough waiting till morning to leave.

  Right?

  Or was she secretly hoping Rick would find her?

  * * * *

  Rick took a deep breath and pushed open his door. He expected to find Kerry sitting on the couch waiting for him. The couch was empty and silence greeted him. He could smell stewing eggplant so he walked to the kitchen and gave it a stir. The phone rang. He answered it, and that’s when he saw the note.

  “Hello?” he said automatically. Why had Kerry left him a thank you note?

  “Hello, may I speak to Kerry Reynolds?”

  “Um, I’m not sure if she’s here. Can you hold on while I check?”

  “Of course.”

  Rick dashed up to his room and was struck by the neatly made bed and stacked books. No bulky duffel bag sprawled across the floor. He searched the whole room and found no trace of Kerry or her things. “Bloody hell, where is she?”

  Then he spied the shirts in the trash bin. He lifted one out and spread it across the bed. A smiley face of holes appeared.

  He ran back to the phone and snatched it up. “Um, she doesn’t appear to be in at the moment. Can I take a message?” Who would be calling for Kerry, who knew she was even here?

  “This is Rebecca Tucker from Aunt Sarah’s. Kerry dropped an application off yesterday and I promised to get back with her today.” She gave Rick the number. “Let her know I’d like her to start work as soon as possible.”

  “I’ll do that,” Rick said. As soon as I find her.

  After hanging up the phone, he peered down the alley behind the house and saw no sign of her.

  “Anybody here?” Evan called from the front of the house.

  “Back here.” Rick sunk onto the vinyl couch and stared through the back door.

  “What are you doing?” Evan sauntered into the Florida room.

  “Kerry’s gone.”

  “About damn time.”

  Rick ran his hand through sweat-dampened hair as Evan plopped into a wicker chair opposite him. “I need to find her.”

  “What the hell for?”

  “I said some stuff. I didn’t mean for her to leave.”

  “What’d you say?”

  “It’s not important, finding her is.”

  “Again, what the hell for? She couldn’t mooch off of you forever. Maybe she’s gone on to greener pastures.” Evan crossed his booted feet. “Besides I came over to tell you that Lydia wants to get together again. I think she was kind of hoping you’d call her, ask her out, you know.”

  Rick scowled. “I’d love to see Lydia again, but not right now.” He stood, and wondered if he was trying to convince himself as much as Evan. And why bother when his mind was consumed with Kerry, not Lydia? “Where could she have gone?”

  His cousin rolled his eyes. “I think it’s crazy to search for her, but since you’re going to anyway, why don’t you check Monroe Park, where the car was?”

  * * * *

  Rick checked the park. He asked around and found Harold, the homeless man Kerry had gotten to know before her car had been towed. The man said he hadn’t seen her.

  “If you do, will you tell her Rick is looking for her? Tell her she didn’t have to leave.” He ran his hand through his hair. “Tell her to at least call me and let me know she’s okay.”

  “That I will.” The man curled back up under the tree and closed his eyes. As Rick stood there debating his next move, a snore erupted from the grizzled man’s lips.

  Rick searched the park, then the VCU campus, the surrounding alleyways, the grocery store. He ventured further, checking the Richmond Public Library, which seemed a good place to spend time in air conditioning. Just as the sun began to set, he drove through Hollywood Cemetery. The tombstones and statues threw eerie shadows across the grass. Rick drove all the way to the new section overlooking the river before admitting that Kerry could be anywhere by now. If she didn’t want him to find her, he wouldn’t.

  “Blast!” He peered into the shadow of a mausoleum doorway and admitted defeat.

  His house was empty and dark when he returned home. Two messages on his machine were from Lydia, “Calling to just say hi,” and one from Evan asking if he’d had any luck and telling him to forget about her.

  Rick found his baghan bharta still on the stove, completely solidified into a charred mass. He turned off the stove and put the pan in soak, realizing he could have burned down his house in his distraction over Kerry.

  He changed into his white workout pants and practiced katas as the moonlight streamed in through the windows. He snapped his leg in a high kick and wished he had a board to smash, anything to release this frustration inside. He was frustrated that he may have caused her to leave and frust
rated that he even cared and frustrated that he couldn’t spend tonight as he had last night, in her arms and in her body.

  * * * *

  Evan’s feet rested on his scuffed coffee table. He flipped channels restlessly, trying not to notice his blinking answering machine. His only phone calls seemed to come from collection agencies these days. He’d thrown his boots on the stack of unopened bills below the mail slot. God, he’d worked his ass off saving the capital to start his towing business, and now he was about to lose it. His lawyer assured him his house was safe, since it wasn’t part of the business. Where he lived didn’t matter, just that he had somewhere to live. The thought of moving in with Rick galled him, though. He knew Rick would welcome him, but the fact that his aunt had disinherited him still stung. Rick owned what should have been his. At least some of it should have been his. He didn’t begrudge Rick his good fortune. Rick was a likable guy, but where had he been during all the years his aunt fought the cancer with chemo and long hospital stays and quack cures? Evan refused to think about what he’d done to cause his disinheritance. He’d been there for his aunt and that should have been all that mattered.

  He lifted the beer bottle to his lips and sipped, pausing on a news broadcast. “The weather is next after these messages.” A different voice said, “Have you seen this woman?” Evan choked on the beer. The woman in the photo looked like Kerry, lighter hair, plumper, but definitely Kerry. And the bottom of the screen … Evan’s mouth fell open. “Twenty-five thousand dollars? For information? I have information.”

  “The high today was ninety-two degrees with a heat index of a hundred and one. Humidity was…”

  “Shit!” He hadn’t had a chance to write down the number. He stared at the weatherman. “I can call the station!” He grabbed the phone book and ripped pages as he searched for the station’s call letters.

  “Hi, I need the phone number in the ad you just ran, the one about the missing woman. Yes, I’ll hold.”

  Evan hummed along with the elevator music even as he tapped his fingers impatiently. This could be his break; this could save his business! All he needed was to buy a little time, be able to pay the next few months’ loan payments, then he’d be back in the black.

  Finally, the woman returned to the phone and gave him an 800 number. He dialed with shaky fingers, thinking only of the twenty-five thousand.

  “Hello? Yes, I’ve seen your missing person … Yes, I’m sure. She’s here. Richmond, Virginia.”

  Evan listened as the man on the line explained that he would not receive the reward money if they came across the country for a hoax. Evan swore this was the real deal. “She says her name is Kerry Reynolds.” This received silence from the other speaker. Finally, the man asked for Evan’s phone number and the exact location of Kerry Reynolds. Here Evan paused, debating whether the truth or a lie would serve better, since he obviously didn’t know where Kerry was at the moment. But he was confident Rick would find her soon and he didn’t want to risk that twenty-five thousand. “I saw her at a bar here. Why don’t we meet up and I should be able to help you pinpoint her exactly. I know the area really well.”

  After Evan hung up the phone, he grabbed his coat and drove to Rick’s. His cousin needed help with his search.

  * * * *

  Kerry huddled between trashcans near the Wonder Bread bakery. Harold had recommended this locale for cleanliness and lack of patrolling officers. It was also well-lit by the streetlamp at the end of the alley and the single-bulb over the emergency exit. It wasn’t far from the park, though. Kerry wondered whether she dared return there in the light of day. She knew Rick was looking for her, thanks to Harold’s report, but she also knew anyone could have seen that missing person ad. No, it was time to move far and fast. Again.

  Kerry sighed then inhaled the wondrous scent of fresh baked bread. Her stomach growled. She should have eaten more before leaving Rick’s, and she should have stashed some fruit and cereal wherever she could.

  Or I should have stolen something pawnable. He may even have cash stashed in his house, if only I’d looked.

  She couldn’t have betrayed Rick’s trust that way. The devil whispered that he wouldn’t have missed a few silver pieces that he’d never even looked at. That was not the point, no matter how hungry she was. The point was she wouldn’t be able to face herself if she stole from the man who had helped her so.

  Good intentions did not fill her stomach, though. Nearby a bin contained plastic bags. Kerry walked closer, paranoia causing her to glance over her shoulder repeatedly. Then she focused on the bin. Bread! Squashed and obviously discarded bread.

  She knocked on the dumpster that Harold had chosen as his bed for the night.

  “Ker?” came his faint voice.

  “Harold, there’s bread.”

  “Bread?” His head peeked over the edge.

  Kerry grabbed a hand to help him out of the dumpster, crinkling her nose at the smell. Then together they went to the bin and snagged all of the bread, every last loaf.

  Again, Kerry thanked God that this was summer as she and Harold sated their hunger. The night air was a balmy seventy degrees. She couldn’t imagine sleeping without shelter in the cold of winter.

  This must be what camping is like. She’d never been, and now she was quite sure she never wanted to.

  The bread had reached a gummy consistency in her mouth and she longed for water. Harold finished eating, so he shoved as much bread in his pockets as would fit. Meanwhile Kerry sacrificed another shirt to make room for a loaf in her duffel.

  Harold returned to the dumpster and Kerry finally closed her eyes, willing herself to sleep. In her huddled position, her legs began to cramp, so she straightened them, her feet peeking past the cans into the alley. Bits of gravel and fractured asphalt poked into her worn jeans. Kerry listened to Harold’s even, heavy snores, hoping the sound would help usher in sleep.

  It didn’t work. Instead, she sat with wide, glassy eyes staring at the brick wall in front of her. Her thoughts bounced between Jason’s hands choking the life from that defenseless woman and Rick above her with passion-soaked eyes. She wanted his arms around her so bad that she could feel them, phantom fingers brushing her cheek. I want the happy ending, she thought, but she couldn’t imagine what miracle would bring that about.

  To distract herself, Kerry pulled out the list of shelters. She wasn’t sure of the exact address of the bakery, but she guessed that a couple of the addresses were fairly close by. Would Jason check the shelters? At the moment, Kerry believed that paranoia equaled survival. The best thing to do would be to change her appearance yet again and find a new city. Perhaps east to Norfolk or north to Washington, DC. Those cities were much larger than Richmond, making it easier to disappear.

  Kerry leaned her head back against the gritty wall. Hopeless. She didn’t even have money for hair dye much less a bus ticket. Finally, her mind shut down. Her eyes drifted close and she slept.

  * * * *

  A banging sound woke Rick from a fitful sleep. Someone was knocking on his door. Thinking Kerry had come to her senses at last, he ran down the stairs and opened the door stark naked.

  “Whoa, cousin, that’s more than I want to see,” Evan said as he stepped across the threshold.

  “Damn,” Rick said. “Shut the door. I’ll be right back.” He darted up the stairs and came back down clothed in his workout pants. “What the hell are you doing here? It’s the middle of the night.”

  “I know what time it is. Gee, you’re cranky.” He sidled past Rick and into the living room. “Have you found her yet?”

  Rick followed Evan to the kitchen where his cousin snatched a beer from the fridge. “No. I looked everywhere that I can think of—VCU, the Fan, even the cemetery.” The Fan was a residential section of Richmond just west of the downtown area. Its streets flared out in a fan shape, hence the name.

  “Okay, have you checked the bus station?” Evan chugged half the bottle and sat it on the counter as water drople
ts condensed and ran down the sides.

  “No. She doesn’t have any money.”

  Evan sneered. “She’s resourceful. What about the train station?”

  “Wouldn’t that be too far for her to get on foot?”

  “Maybe.”

  “And she doesn’t have money for a ticket.”

  “As far as you know.”

  Rick grabbed Evan’s beer and sipped. “Still foul. What do you mean, as far as I know?”

  “Have you checked to see if anything’s missing?”

  “No, but I know she didn’t take anything.”

  Evan snorted. “You are so gullible. I can’t believe you think someone like Kerry is trustworthy!”

  “She’s got secrets, yes, but she’s not a thief.” He closed his eyes. He would not believe it.

  “Rick, I’m not saying that at some point she wasn’t a good person, but desperation can make people act in strange ways, do things they wouldn’t normally do.” Evan glanced at the floor.

  “You’re right, but I still want to find her. And why are you here, if you’re so set against it?” Rick tried to peer into his cousin’s eyes, but he kept them averted.

  “I’m not against it. I’m here to help you. I’m just saying she may’ve gotten farther afield than you think.”

  Rick nodded.

  “Well, come on.” Evan clapped him on the shoulder and met his eyes for just a moment before looking away again. “Let’s search.”

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Hours later, Rick and Evan had canvassed the bus station, train station and four shelters. The sun was up and the humidity had already set in.

  Evan glanced at his watch as they paused in the McDonald’s parking lot. “Well, shit, I’ve got to get to work.”

  Rick combed a hand through his hair, then wiped it across his eyes. “Thanks for all your help, cousin. I might look a bit more now that it’s light, then I’m going home to sleep.”