Goody Two Shoes (Invertary Book 2)

by Janet Elizabeth Henderson

  With a grin that made her giddy, Josh put her back on her feet. Their friends were whooping loudly.

  “It’s time for the rings,” the vicar said.

  Mitch handed them to Josh. He turned back to Caroline. “They’re not what you expected because I thought we could pick them out together on our honeymoon.”

  She looked down at the two plastic toy rings in Josh’s palm. She cocked an eyebrow at him.

  “You forgot to get the rings, didn’t you?”

  Mitch covered his mouth as he struggled not to laugh.

  “I might have let it slip.” For once Josh was the one who turned a nice shade of red.

  Caroline put her hands on her hips. “I gave you one job to do, Josh McInnes.”

  He rolled his eyes. “Is this really the time and place for that discussion?”

  She looked over her shoulder at their grinning friends and family. “Probably not, but don’t think it isn’t going to happen.”

  He winked at her. “I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

  He placed the pink plastic ring on her finger and grinned like he’d won the lottery. “We can pick out the one you want in Paris. Along with some new clothes.” He thought about it for a minute. “And lots of lingerie.”

  She smacked him on the chest. He nabbed her hand and held it tight above his heart.

  “Okay,” the vicar interrupted. “It’s Sunday night and I usually spend it watching Strictly Come Dancing. So how about we wrap this up?”

  Josh squeezed Caroline’s hand tight.

  “By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Have at it. Kiss the woman.”

  “With pleasure.” Josh’s lips descended on Caroline.

  It wasn’t a polite kiss. It was a long, deep plundering kiss that stole the air from her lungs and the strength from her legs. When Josh pulled away from her, his look was knowing. “We’re having a short reception. In the kitchen.” He quirked an eyebrow at her, but did it with a smile. “Because the kitchen is the only room in the house with a floor.” Caroline grinned at him. “Then we’re heading to Paris. You and me. No people. No houseguests. No press. I’ll have you all to myself.”

  He leaned down and kissed her again as the band began to play. Josh wrapped his arms around her, tucked his face in the crook of her neck and swayed to the music. Caroline gripped his shoulders. She wasn’t entirely sure that this wasn’t all a dream.

  “Well, Mrs. McInnes.” She felt the words against her skin. “Any regrets?”

  “Give me a week to answer that,” Caroline told him with a cheeky grin. “I’m sure I’ll come up with something.”

  EPILOGUE

  Nine Months Later—Invertary Castle

  When Josh McInnes realised that his wife had gone into labour, he did what any self-respecting celebrity would do and called his manager.

  “Caroline is having the baby. Right now. And we need to get the midwife.” Josh had him on speakerphone while he pulled on his shoes.

  “Then why are you calling me?”

  “He’s got a point.” Caroline was calmly checking the battery on her e-reader. Josh was pretty sure that there wouldn’t be time during labour to read a book, but he wasn’t going to tell her that. Since she’d given up her work at the community centre, she’d filled her time with researching Invertary history and reading dodgy romance novels. Well, that and running the town.

  He turned his attention back to Mitch. “Pyro and a bunch of his paparazzi mates are camped at the gate. I’m worried the midwife won’t be able to get into the castle.”

  “Then why not call, Lake? What am I supposed to do about it?”

  Caroline doubled over the bed as another contraction hit her. How could she be so calm? When the pain passed, she shouted at the speakerphone, “Don’t worry, Mitch—it’s his automatic reaction to call you when anything happens. We’re hanging up now to call the midwife.”

  “We are?” Josh wasn’t sure the midwife could deal with Pyro.

  “Hang up, Josh. See you later, Mitch.”

  Josh pressed the end button before Mitch could reply.

  Caroline smiled at him. She was even more beautiful than the day he’d met her. “Call the midwife. And call Betty. She knows what to do about Pyro.”

  “Betty?”

  “Lake’s on another job. I made arrangements with Betty.”

  “But Betty?” Josh stared at her.

  His wife was in labour. The baby was coming. And he wanted her to call an eighty-seven-year-old woman with an attitude problem?

  “Josh. Dial the phone now or you’ll be delivering this baby.”

  He dialled the midwife. “I’ll be right there,” she promised before hanging up on him.

  “We should be in a hospital.” Josh knew there was no point bringing it up, but he couldn’t help himself. They’d been arguing about this for nine months.

  “The nearest hospital is an hour’s drive from here. Plus I want to have our baby at home.”

  “What if something goes wrong?”

  “Calm down, Josh. It’s just a baby. Women have been having them for a very long time.”

  “They haven’t been having my baby!”

  Caroline waddled over to him and pulled him down for a kiss. “You need to call Betty.”

  “Damn it.” He dialled the wicked witch of Invertary and put her on speaker. “Betty, it’s Josh. The baby is coming.”

  “Say no more. Operation Stork is good to go.”

  “Operation Stork?” He could feel his blood pressure rise as he asked the question.

  Betty cackled before he heard a dial tone.

  “It’ll be okay.” Caroline bent over the bed again. “Rub my back. The midwife will be here soon.”

  Josh wanted to run screaming around the building until someone who knew what they were doing turned up. Instead, he rubbed his wife’s back.

  “This is the last child we’re having.” He’d get a vasectomy if that was what it took. He wasn’t going through this again.

  Caroline laughed. Man, but he loved her laugh. “You used to be so easygoing. I had to fight to make you take anything seriously.”

  “You’ve been a bad influence on me.”

  She laughed some more.

  A horn honked outside. The front door slammed. A few minutes later, the midwife barrelled in. “Has he freaked out completely yet?” She grinned at Josh. He glared at her.

  Caroline smiled at him. “Better call for backup. Any minute now he’s going to need medical attention.”

  How she could joke at a time like this, he didn’t know.

  “Saw Betty and the old folk downstairs. They’re lobbing eggs at the paparazzi.”

  “Eggs?” Josh knew he was screeching. He couldn’t seem to stop it. “That’s the big plan.”

  Caroline patted his hand. “That’s phase one.” She turned to the midwife. “Maybe you should give him something to calm him down.”

  As the two women chuckled, Caroline suddenly stopped still.

  “What is it?” He knew they should have gone to the hospital. It was a mistake letting Caroline get her own way on a home birth. He should have laid down the law. He scoffed to himself. Like that ever worked. He glared at his wedding ring. Even though he’d had it engraved with the words from The Lord of the Rings: one ring to rule them all. The damn thing had no power at all.

  Caroline pointed downward. “My water broke.”

  Josh saw the first signs of an actual birth, and it was too much for him. The room spun and the last thing he felt was his head hitting the floor.

  “Wake up, Daddy.”

  Josh could have sworn that was Mitch.

  His eyes flickered open to see Mitch grinning down at him. He had his iPhone in his hand. “This is definitely going on YouTube.”

  “Leave him alone.” Caroline sounded amused.

  Caroline! The baby!

  Josh struggled to his feet to find his wife propped up in bed, a little bundle of pink wrapped in her
arms. “Is that the baby?”

  “Come meet your daughter.” Caroline smiled at him. Her face was flushed and her hair was dishevelled, but she had never been more magnificent.

  Stunned, he walked over to her. “How long was I out?”

  She laughed. “A while. But you fainted several times. You kept coming to and then you’d see something you didn’t like and you’d drop again. Don’t worry, Mitch filmed it. Your passing out, I mean, not the birth.”

  He glared at his friend, who shrugged. Josh took a deep breath and pulled back the pink blanket. The most beautiful little face appeared. It was a tiny Caroline. He stopped breathing.

  “Our daughter,” he said with awe.

  He dragged his attention away from his perfect little person to kiss his wife. “Man, I love you.”

  She gave him the same smile that got them in this position in the first place. “I know.” Her voice was smug.

  Josh brushed her hair back from her face. “Are you okay? Was it tough?”

  She laughed. “It was fast and painful. But I still think I had an easier time than you did.”

  “Let’s not do it again.” Josh reached for his daughter, and Caroline handed her over. As soon as he held her in his arms, his heart melted. He didn’t think it was possible to love someone as much as he loved Caroline. Now there were two women who owned him. “Well, maybe not for a couple of years, anyway.”

  Caroline reached for his hand as she grinned at him. “You promised me three babies.”

  He sighed. It was no use arguing. Caroline always got her way. “Fine. But the next time we go to the hospital.”

  “Yeah,” Mitch said. “Let them deal with Josh when he passes out.”

  Caroline shut her eyes and snuggled back against the pillows. She had a very self-satisfied smile on her face. Josh watched his new-born sleep. He had it all. Wife. Daughter. Home. Life was pretty damn good.

  “See?” He confronted his best friend. “And you thought that whole arranged marriage idea was dumb. Bet you regret that now.”

  “Yes. I am in awe of your genius.”

  “Damn right. The plan was brilliant.”

  Mitch rolled his eyes, and Josh thought he heard Caroline giggle. Let them think what they liked. No one could convince him that his wedding plan didn’t turn out perfectly.

  OTHER BOOKS BY JANET

  Invertary Book One

  Englishman Lake Benson loaned his life savings to his dippy sister so that she could buy a shop. It was a big mistake. His sister was steadily flushing his money down the drain - and now he wants it back. Years in the special forces taught Lake that if you want a job done, do it yourself. So he steps in to make the shop profitable, sell it and get his money back. The only problem is, the business is an underwear shop. And all Lake knows about underwear can be summed up in how fast he can unsnap a bra. To make matters worse, the tiny highland town already has a lingerie shop. A successful one, run by an ex-lingerie model. A very gorgeous ex-lingerie model, who’s distracting him from his mission more than he’d like to admit. If Lake wants to get his savings back, and get out of Scotland, he only has one option - wipe out the competition.

  Kirsty Campbell has spent years rebuilding her life after she woke up in hospital in Spain to find her body scarred, and her ex-fiance had run off with all her money. The last thing she needs is a cocky, English soldier-boy trying to ruin all she has left. Her home town is only too happy to help her fight the latest English invasion, although Lake is beginning to sway them with his sex appeal and cut price knickers. With the help of her mother, and the retired ladies of Knit or Die, Kirsty sets about making sure that her shop is the last one standing in Invertary.

  It’s Scotland versus England as you’ve never seen it before. It’s lingerie war.

  London Book One

  Madeline Lewis wants to be the next big thing in something - anything. She is tired of failure, although to be fair she does cause most of it, but now she wants to be a success. And the only thing standing between her and world domination is Dean Montgomery, her childhood friend.

  Dean has been in Maddie's life so long that he's taken on the attributes of wallpaper. That's something Dean plans to change and fast. He'd tired cleaning up Maddie's messes, he's tired of being the sensible one and he's tired of being invisible. Maddie might be confused about what she wants out of life, but Dean knows what he wants - Madeline Lewis.

  She won't know what hit her.

  London Book Two

  Winner of the 2013 Silken Sands Star Award from Romance Writers of America

  Laura needs to interview the hero of the moment to keep her new job with a women's magazine. She'd rather stick a fork in her eye. Twelve years have passed since her disastrous one night stand with Charlie and they've barely exchanged two civil words in that time. She calls him the Neanderthal and he calls her The Iron Maiden. If it wasn't for the fact his sister was Laura's best friend, she wouldn't have anything at all to do with him.

  Charlie has come back from a stint in Afghanistan with a souvenir - nightmares. After one afternoon arguing with Laura, Charlie makes a wonderful discovery: she's so irritating, she scares away his dreams. So Charlie agrees to give her an interview - at a price. She has to accompany him on a two week cycling holiday in Holland, that way he might actually get the rest he needs. He takes particular delight in the plan because he knows that Laura hates exercise, loathes the outdoors and despises him. It feels good to have the upper hand for a change.

  Laura needs an interview. Charlie needs sleep. And they both need to grow up and get over the past. But not before Laura cycles into a canal, sets fire to a tent and posts nude pictures of Charlie on the internet - all with the hope of getting her story.

  The Davina Code

  It's irritating when romance gets in the way of your goals. And falling in lust with Jack Miller is definitely getting in the way of Davina's plans. Davina has a movie to make and an acting career to resurrect - okay, so it was never alive in the first place, but that's not the point. The point is: she's hitting thirty and she wants to be famous. And if that means making an indie movie with "borrowed" film equipment and shooting the movie in Jack's house without permission - then so be it.

  She's a woman on a mission and nothing is going to stop her from achieving her dream. Not even her sexy, ex-cop, landlord who is pretty focused himself. Unfortunately his goals revolve around evicting her from his house, putting her in jail and getting her into bed - and he doesn't seem to mind which one happens first.

  ABOUT JANET

  This is a self-portrait I did when I was going through my ‘blue period’ – we affectionately call it ‘Janet Smurf’. Now you can see why I write instead of paint!

  But enough about that—here’s a little about me. I was born in Scotland and now I live in New Zealand. I’ve been here almost ten years and I absolutely love it! I’m married to a lovely Dutch man who tolerates the fact I make fun of him on my Facebook page. I have two adorable little girls and several mad animals that eat up a lot of my time during the day. This means I do all my writing in the dark when everyone is asleep. I put on some music and entertain myself with stories of people falling in love. It’s such fun to watch the characters screw up from the comfort of my wee office! I’m a trained artist, an ex-teacher and travel junkie. But most of all – I LOVE to talk to people! So if you want to contact me, then please do.

  Here is my facebook page

  Here is my website

  A BIG THANK YOU

  Thank you!

  A big thank you to the fabulous Scotland shop www.ScotlandShop.com for letting me use a photo of their gorgeous tartan shoes on the cover of this book.

  Thank you to the ladies of Romance Writers New Zealand for their support, humour and encouragement. I would feel like a nutty hermit without you!

  Thank you to Liz Dempsey, who reads all of my books searching for mistakes, even though she'd rather be reading horror!

  Thank you to my wonderful supportive husb
and, who after nineteen years together still makes my heart race. Without you entertaining the kids, there would be no books. Although, there would be even more if you stopped constantly interrupting me to ask how the work was going! I love you very much and hope that one day you'll actually read more than the acknowledgement page and make it through a whole book!

  And, last but not least, thank you to my readers. You lot are lovely! Your letters of encouragement and support have a huge impact on my life and I appreciate them ever so much. Thank you for reading my books.

  COPYRIGHT

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locals or persons, living or dead, is coincidental.

  Copyright © 2014 Janet Kortlever

  All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning, uploading, and electronic sharing of any part of this book without permission of the publisher is unlawful privacy and theft of the author's intellectual property. If you would like to use material from the book (other than for review purposes), prior permission can be obtained by contacting the author through her website. Thank you for your support of the author's rights.

  Author's website:

  www.janetelizabethhenderson.com

  ISBN: 978-0-473-30227-6