Outback Dreams

by Rachael Johns

  Monty, Faith, Ruby, Adam and Simone congregated in a little group, surveying their handiwork.

  ‘It looks unreal,’ Faith said, with a very un-Faith-like quiver in her voice. There were only a few times in Monty’s life he’d seen her cry—happy tears or otherwise. ‘Thank you everyone.’

  ‘Don’t be ridiculous. It was a hoot.’ Simone pumped the air like a cheerleader. ‘Can’t wait for tomorrow night.’

  ‘It was our pleasure,’ Ruby added. ‘We won’t know what to do with ourselves when it’s all over. Life will be quite dull all of a sudden.’

  Faith laughed. ‘I think I’ll be quite happy with dull for a while.’ She took Monty’s hand and squeezed it, and he knew life would never be dull with her.

  Everyone said goodbye after that, promising to be back early next morning for the final touches. Monty stayed close to Faith as she locked up the hall and counted ten yawns in as many minutes.

  ‘You know, if you’re too tired for the barbecue, I’m sure mum will understand. There’ll be plenty of time to catch up tomorrow night. We could go back to your house instead if you’d like.’

  She raised her eyebrows at him. ‘Like I’ll get much rest if you take me home. No, I’m fine. I want to hang with your family, and besides, I think it’ll do Dad the world of good.’

  She’d told him all about the talk she’d had with her father. Although Monty had been angry at the way Frank had treated her, he couldn’t help but feel for the bloke. The idea of losing Faith like Frank had lost Cassie—when they thought they still had years ahead of them—didn’t bear thinking about.

  ‘All right then,’ he said, leading her out of the hall. ‘My place it is. Family barbecue here we come.’

  She swatted him on the side of his arm. ‘You make it sound like some kind of torture.’

  ‘Isn’t it?’ he asked. Not big on family get-togethers like his mum and Faith, Monty would much rather have spent the evening alone with her, but if he had to do the whole ‘happy families’ thing, it was going to be much easier doing it together.

  She shook her head and turned to lock the hall, punching in the alarm code. ‘I’m not going to dignify that with an answer.’

  There were already three cars out the front of Monty’s place when they arrived. He and Faith headed up the weed-ridden garden path and into the house. Tchaikovsky wafted from the stereo system. Will couldn’t endure any music other than classical.

  ‘Oh, there you are.’ Jenni smiled as they entered.

  Monty glanced around the lounge room and nodded at the middle-aged couple drinking wine on the couch. They were dressed up, completely unlike his parents and Faith’s family. Stuart wore thongs and Jenni a wafty hippy dress, while Frank and Ryan still wore the clothes they’d been working in that day. Will and his girlfriend were noticeably absent.

  ‘Zoe and Pete, meet my son Daniel and his gorgeous Faith,’ Jenni said, gesturing the two of them.

  The man rose and stepped forward. He offered Monty his hand and then greeted Faith with a lingering kiss on the cheek.

  His wife kissed Monty and offered Faith a smile. ‘Will didn’t tell us his brother had a girlfriend.’

  ‘Certainly not one as pretty as you,’ Pete said, all but ogling Faith. His voice had the ring of a used-car salesman. The hairs on the back of Monty’s neck prickled and he pulled her a little closer.

  ‘Oh, it’s a recent thing,’ Faith told them.

  ‘We’re just so happy,’ Jenni gushed. ‘Both of our boys have found gorgeous girls. What can I get you to drink, Faith?’

  ‘I’m okay for now. Where’s Will? I’m dying to see him and meet Pippa.’

  ‘They’re outside.’ Stuart chuckled. ‘Will said something about the house being too small for this many people, but my guess is he’s searching for specimens.’

  ‘As long as he doesn’t bring them inside.’ Monty shuddered at the thought. Why anyone would keep spiders as pets he had no idea.

  ‘Let’s go see them.’ Faith grabbed his hand and tugged towards the back door.

  ‘Back soon folks.’ He waved to the others as they headed outside.

  Faith was already scanning the sparse backyard as they stepped onto the verandah. Her brow furrowed in concentration and he couldn’t resist pulling her back for a quick kiss. She leaned into him, reaching up and wrapping her arms around his neck. There was no possibility of things getting more heated out here with their families only metres away, but that didn’t matter. Just kissing Faith made his heart feel right. It had never been like this with any other woman. They shared a connection that went deeper than sexual attraction, a closeness he’d never felt with anyone else.

  ‘So it’s true.’

  Monty jumped at the sound of Will’s voice and reluctantly pulled back from Faith. His brother had entered the back yard through the side gate, holding hands with a pretty-looking girl. Well, woman would be the accurate term, but she had an innocent look in her eyes that made her seem quite young.

  ‘This must be Pippa,’ Monty said, still holding Faith close. ‘Pleased to meet you.’ He didn’t offer his hand because if Pippa was like Will she wouldn’t be comfortable touching someone she’d only just met.

  ‘How long have you two been swapping saliva?’ Will blurted out, not at all concerned with introducing his girlfriend.

  ‘Long enough,’ Monty replied, biting down the urge to reprimand him for being so blunt.

  ‘Hi, Will. Hi, Pippa. I’m Faith. Nice to meet you.’ Faith smiled at the other woman and was rewarded with a tentative smile back.

  ‘Are you the person overseeing the Barking Ball?’ Pippa asked.

  ‘Yes, that’s me,’ Faith said warmly.

  ‘Will said you were a tomboy.’ Pippa glanced down at Faith’s old jeans, long-sleeved shirt and desperately-needing-to-be-polished boots. ‘If you brushed your hair, though, you could be quite pretty.’

  Faith instinctively lifted a hand to her ponytail.

  Monty knew Pippa didn’t mean any harm, but he wanted to protect Faith’s feelings. ‘Faith is gorgeous as she is. Shall we go in and see if they’re ready to fire up the barbecue?’

  ‘It’s an electric one, not fire,’ Will corrected him.

  Breathe, he told himself. He needed to remember this wasn’t a battle. That no matter how far Will had come, life was always black and white with him. He and Pippa lived in a literal world. No subtext. No nuances. No lies.

  ‘So, it is,’ he said instead, trying not to sound sarcastic. ‘Who’s hungry?’

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  While Faith, Will and Pippa stayed on the back verandah, Monty went inside to collect the tongs and stuff for the barbecue. When he emerged, the others followed him out, and together they watched the sun turn the sky beautiful shades of purple as it sank below the horizon. For a rental, Monty’s backyard had a priceless view of the beach. Feeling content and so happy she thought her heart might burst, Faith leaned against a pole and chatted to Pippa’s mum while they waited for the meat to cook.

  ‘It’s a fabulous thing you’re doing with the ball,’ Zoe said, caressing the stem of her barely touched glass of wine. ‘Quite aside from the funds you’ll raise, it’s always good to bring autism into the public light. So many people are nervous around Pippa when they find out she has autism because they don’t understand her. I guess you chose the charity because of Will?’

  Faith nodded. ‘We spent a lot of time together growing up, and I saw how difficult life was for him because people wouldn’t accept his differences, wouldn’t try to understand them. When I read about the dogs specially trained to help children on the spectrum, I couldn’t help thinking how fabulous such a pet would have been for the Montgomerys.’

  Zoe nodded. ‘Yes, there was nothing like that available when Pippa was diagnosed either, but I’m not complaining. We did the best with the knowledge and resources we had, and I think she’s grown into an amazing woman. We’re very proud of her.’

  ‘So you should be.’ Fai
th followed Zoe’s gaze to her daughter. She and Will had retreated to the garden again and were peering into the middle of a half-dead bush with a torch. Faith guessed there was some kind of insect there that Will wanted to study.

  Despite enjoying her conversation with Zoe, Faith’s gaze kept drifting to Monty and the way he hovered over the barbecue, biceps flexing as he turned steaks and sausages until they were near charcoaled. Arms had to be the sexiest part of the male body. Well, almost… Feeling a quiver low in her belly, she banished the thought and tried to concentrate on the conversation going on around her.

  Once the meat was ready, Jenni laid the salads onto Monty’s faded blue plastic table and everyone ate their fill. Faith, who usually loved a good barbeque, found the smell of the meat a little off-putting and decided to stick to salad. As there weren’t enough chairs for everyone to sit at the table, she plonked herself down on the back steps with Monty and listened as people took turns asking him about Clancy’s Breakaway.

  She couldn’t have asked for a more perfect evening—her family together again with Monty’s. Glancing across at her dad, she smiled at the way his fingers wrapped around a stubby holder and the grin on his face as he listened eagerly to Monty’s plans for the future. She wasn’t naive enough to think their relationship was back to what it had once been, but they were making steps towards patching it up. Her gaze drifted up to the sky—a perfectly clear night—and she imagined her mum peering down at them. Cassie would have loved this night.

  We’re going to be okay, Mum. We’re all going to be okay.

  ‘Ooh, I simply can’t wait for grandchildren,’ Jenni announced.

  ‘Don’t hold your breath, Mum. Faith doesn’t want kids,’ Monty said with a laugh.

  Faith had drifted off into her own little world but snapped out of it at the mention of children. She had no clue how Monty had conceived the idea she didn’t want kids, but she didn’t have time to contemplate this because her mind suddenly snagged on something else. The smell of meat had made her feel sick tonight, and she couldn’t recall the last time she’d had her period.

  While the conversation continued on around her, she racked her brain trying to think of dates. She’d bought a pack of tampons at the IGA a while ago, but was that before or after they’d been down south? Her stomach churned as she counted back … oh Lord, she should have used that pack by now. Maybe her period was late due to stress or something.

  Could I be pregnant?

  She could get a test. But the local chemist was closed at this time of the night, and anyway, a pregnancy testing kit wasn’t the kind of thing you could buy incognito in a place the size of Bunyip Bay. Before she’d even walked out the door, the whole town would be betting on whether she was having a girl or a boy.

  How would she get through tomorrow with this on her mind?

  Think about it logically.

  She was on the pill. Wasn’t it something like 99.9 per cent effective? Sure, they recommended you took it at exactly the same time each day, but really, who did that? Who had such a strict daily regime that they remembered such things? Maybe she’d forgotten one day… She blinked, trying to order her thoughts into something logical.

  So what if I am pregnant? How bad could it be?

  A smile snuck up on her as she imagined the house at Clancy’s Breakaway filling once again with children like Tim and Nora had hoped. She thought of buying a highchair along with the kitchen table and a cot along with their bed. A pleasurable flutter danced in her stomach and her head felt light, as if she’d had too much to drink.

  Drink? She breathed out deeply, relieved that she’d turned down alcohol tonight due to tiredness and having to drive. As a social drinker, her mission to stay away from Monty meant she hadn’t overindulged at all this last month, but was any amount safe? A tightness in her chest replaced the light-headedness.

  She’d never forgive herself if she had somehow harmed their baby.

  ‘Faith? Are you okay?’ Monty’s hand came to rest on her shoulder, concern evident in his voice. ‘You look like you’re in pain.’

  Everyone was looking at her, staring as if they required an answer, but she had no idea what the question had been or who had even asked it. She swallowed and looked into Monty’s face full of love and concern. But the crease on his brow reminded her of the brief conversation they’d had about contraception on their way back from Clancy’s Breakaway. He’d been appalled at the idea of them accidentally making a baby. Surely that was just the situation and the fact it hadn’t been planned.

  Or was it? What if she was pregnant and… Oh geez, she had to get away before these thoughts suffocated her. She needed to share her suspicions with Monty. She needed him to wrap his lovely arms around her and tell her that whether she was pregnant or not, everything was going to be okay.

  ‘I’m fine,’ she smiled. ‘Just tired.’

  ‘I’ll take you home.’ Monty had already discarded his plastic plate on the step and was pushing to stand. ‘You can collect your car tomorrow.’

  ‘Thanks.’

  Frank swallowed a mouthful of sausage and started to stand himself. ‘It’s all right, Ryan and I can take her.’

  No, Faith wanted to cry. She’d never get any sleep if she didn’t talk to Monty, and this wasn’t the kind of conversation they should have over the phone.

  As if reading her mind, Ryan piped up, ‘Dad, I think Monty might want to take Faith home. He might even want to stay the night.’

  ‘Oh, I see. Right.’ Frank nodded, blushing. ‘Of course. You know, you’re more than welcome to stay over whenever you like, Daniel.’

  ‘Thanks, Frank,’ Monty said, taking Faith’s hand and helping her up. ‘We’ll see you all tomorrow.’

  She tried to keep calm as she said her goodbyes, but all she could think about was the fact she might be carrying Monty’s baby. With every second that passed the idea grew more appealing, so that by the time they were alone in the confines of his ute, she couldn’t wait to share her news.

  He clicked his seatbelt into place, turned the key in the ignition and immediately placed his spare hand on her knee. It tingled, sending a rush of warmth all over her body. ‘So, Forrester, are you really tired or did you simply want to get me alone?’

  ‘Cocky, aren’t you?’ She paused a moment. ‘But one hundred per cent correct. There’s something I need to tell you.’

  ‘Go on.’ Monty reversed out his drive and started down the street. ‘As long as you don’t say you want a pastel pink bedspread and lacy pillowcases, we’ll be sweet.’

  Something between a snort and a laugh slipped from her lips. ‘Hell no.’ Then it was her turn to pause. This wasn’t an easy thing to say. They’d been so consumed with joy at finally being together, and with the ball and the move, they hadn’t even talked about a family.

  ‘What is it, Faith?’

  ‘I think I might be pregnant.’

  Monty swerved the vehicle as if dodging a kangaroo, except the road was clear in front of them. He didn’t say a word.

  Placing a hand against her racing heart, Faith said, ‘Maybe you should pull over. I guess this is a bit of a shock.’

  Heeding her advice, he stopped in a gravel layaway at the side of the dark, empty road. They sat there, breathing in the silence. ‘When you say “might", what exactly do you mean?’ he asked after a few heartbeats.

  She took a breath. ‘Well, when your mum mentioned grandchildren back there, I realised I haven’t had my period in almost two months. I was due a couple of weeks after we went down south.’

  ‘But I thought you were on the pill.’ His tone put her on the defensive.

  ‘I am. But it’s not one hundred per cent fail-safe, you know.’

  ‘Okay…’ He spoke slowly as if he were trying to work out how to deal with a major problem.

  ‘Look, I don’t know for sure, but it wouldn’t be the end of the world, would it? We might not have planned having kids this soon, but we’re both almost thirty years old. We�
��re healthy, secure, in love.’

  ‘I thought you didn’t want children.’

  She blinked. ‘I don’t know where you got that idea from. I love kids. I wouldn’t coach the netball team if I didn’t.’

  ‘But … when we were kids you said babies bored you. That you couldn’t see the point of them.’

  Faith burst out laughing. He had the best memory of anyone she knew, but… ‘I was what? Ten years old? Twelve? I was hardly thinking seriously about motherhood. It was probably more like babies scared me. But no, I want children as much as the next person.’ She swallowed. ‘And I want to have them with you.’

  She waited for Monty to laugh as well. To say something reassuring like, yes he loved her too, and that was exactly what he wanted. That this was simply a shock, or rather a surprise—a surprise was a much sweeter way of looking at it. But he remained deafeningly silent.

  She scratched an itchy spot on her hand, played with the collar of her jumper and tensed as her heart began to pound. His silence spoke volumes.

  ‘I…’ Her mouth remained open but no more words came out. She swallowed, desperate to rid it of its sudden dryness. Nausea reared in her belly but she ignored it. Finally, she tried again, ‘I guess you don’t want to have a family with me then?’

  Her hand rested protectively on her belly, which was ridiculous because she might have nothing to protect, but it was instinctual.

  ‘I didn’t say that.’ Monty turned abruptly in his seat.

  With no streetlights on the wide country road, the only light came from the ute’s headlights shining ahead and she couldn’t read the expression on his face.