Home Ice

by Rachelle Vaughn

  Vin introduced himself and got right down to business. “I’ve coordinated an array of workouts with the strength and conditioning coach for the Blizzards. We’ll do a lot of agility footwork and sprints for speed and overall conditioning. Then, we’ll move on to some balance work because you balance on two-centimeter blades all game. Our number one goal is injury prevention. Number two goal is sports performance. We’ll be focusing on places where players get injured the most: ankles, knees and shoulders. Today we’re going to work on your leg and upper body strength for battles in the corner.”

  “Cool. Sounds like you covered everything. There is one thing, though, Vin. I don’t want to bulk up.”

  “Of course not. You’re a hockey player. We want you to be lean and flexible. We don’t want the body-builder look. That would detract you from being fluid on the ice.”

  “Right.”

  Ben decided to give in. This guy obviously knew what he was talking about and he shouldn’t have been dragging his feet in the first place. It wasn’t even that he doubted Coach‘s suggestions and methods. But maybe starting a training regimen in Denver made the move all too real. And final.

  Mid-way through their workout, Ben started to think about Ally. She had a way of popping into his head at the most unexpected and inopportune times. Long distance had sounded like a good idea at the time, but it was proving to be much more difficult. He was diligently trying to make things work, but their conversations were strained and growing more awkward by the day. And if he didn’t know any better, Ben thought she was purposely avoiding him. Then again, if they were slowly drifting apart, he welcomed it for the prospect of moving on. Or so he kept telling himself.

  Besides, he didn’t have the time to coddle their relationship. Since he’d moved, every minute of his time was spent promoting and interviewing and now training.

  Ben wondered what Ally was doing right now. He seriously doubted she was being tortured by Lou Ferrigno’s bald cousin.

  * * *

  Ally found herself driving into Ben’s old neighborhood. Her car seemed to turn itself onto his street and stop at the red Open House sign. The house was still beautiful, but knowing that it was empty somehow made it lose some of its charm.

  Without thinking, Ally parked on the street and got out of her car. She looked over at the gate by the garage and remembered their first date together. Before she could replay that night in her mind, her feet were moving her up the stone path and to the front door. After a deep breath, she put her hand on the knob, turned it and went inside.

  Empty of furniture, it was even bigger inside than before. The house echoed with every sound and footstep. A middle-aged woman in a green suit greeted Ally in the living room. Ally almost looked right through the woman, she was so overcome by emotions evoked from the house.

  Ben’s house.

  The house he would never live in again. The house that would never hear their laughter bouncing off its walls again. The house where he would never lay his head next to hers, ever again.

  “Welcome,” the lady in green said warmly, breaking through Ally‘s stroll down memory lane. “Feel free to look around. My name is Joan, if you have any quest--” she stopped mid-sentence and squinted her eyes at Ally. “Hey, aren’t you a friend of Izzy’s?”

  Ally nodded and looked over at the indentations in the carpet where the leather sofa had been just weeks before. A card table with flyers, home brochures and business cards was set up where Ben’s dining table had been. The table where they had once made love so passionately.

  “Izzy is out getting refreshments and she should be back,” Joan glanced down at her watch, “any minute now.” She saw Ally pale under her already porcelain skin. “Are you all right?” Joan asked with concern.

  When Joan had volunteered to help Izzy with the open house, she hadn’t prepared herself for any of Izzy’s weirdo friends dropping by in a vacant-like state.

  Ally forced a weak smile and looked at Joan and away from the sliding glass door that had been wiped clean of smudges left by Moose. Any trace of the larger than life canine was gone. Ally tried to focus on Joan’s suit as her eyes filled with swirling green tears.

  “Can I get you some water or something?” Joan asked worriedly. The girl looked like she was going to faint and Joan knew that that certainly wouldn’t look good to a potential buyer coming through the front door.

  “I just need a minute with the house.” Ally forced out the words, her throat tightening like a vice.

  Then Ally brushed by Joan like the poor woman wasn’t even there. The lady in green didn’t exist to her. The only thing that existed in the house was her memories. Memories of Ben and all that she had tossed away. With one sentence, she jeopardized any future she had with the only man she had ever loved.

  Ally’s trepid feet padded on the plush carpet of the long hallway. Once inside the master bedroom, the tears threatened to break free from her tired eyes. This was where she had first given herself to him. Given herself wholly and completely with no question or hesitation.

  Why couldn’t she have done the same when he asked her to move away with him? Why couldn’t she have accepted his proposal wholly and completely? Why did she feel like her feet were cemented to this town?

  The grand floor to ceiling windows looked out onto the patio, letting in the bright afternoon sun. Light danced over the four indentations in the carpet on the far side of the room. Four dents where Ben’s bed had sat. Ally winced. It was a mistake to come here. She knew it was going to be painful, but this was sheer torture.

  Good, she thought. I deserve it.

  She walked into the master closet and shut the door behind her without turning on the light. She knew it was empty. All the rows of suits and shoes packed up and sent away. Far, far away.

  Leaning against the wall, she let her body slide down to the floor and hugged her knees close. Now that she knew she was alone, she let the tears come full force. She could smell his scent still lingering in the dark closet, taunting her and curling itself around her in the darkness.

  Thinking of the past, Ally transported herself above her emotions and to the time when she first walked into this very same closet. It was after they had showered together following their first time making love. Noticing that most of his suit labels said Hugo Boss, she had asked him about it.

  “They fit really well.” He had pulled her into his strong and capable arms. “Speaking of a good fit…” Then, he had taken her mouth along with the rest of her willing body and they made love right next to his row of Nike’s.

  Ally’s own sob startled her and brought her back into the present. When she opened her wet eyes, it took a moment for them to adjust to the darkness. She focused on steadying her breathing and stared into the blackness, trying to pull herself together. She could do this. She could drag herself from the dismal closet and into the bleak reality of her life.

  When a sudden stream of light appeared, she realized someone was opening the door. “I just need a minute, Joan,” Ally croaked.

  “Honey, it’s me.” Izzy looked down at her friend huddled in the corner. Ally’s red eyes looked up at her and sliced through Izzy’s heart. Izzy tried to muster a smile and sat down next to her, folding her short legs under her petite body. Ally let her heavy head fall to rest on Izzy’s bony shoulders. Quietly, they sat together in the windowless room.

  “You found me,” Ally finally said, breaking the silence.

  “Yeah. Joan said that Zombie Barbie showed up and I immediately knew it had to be you.”

  Ally tried to laugh but it came out as a sort of half snort. She wiped her nose on the back of her hand. “I’m sorry. I had to come.”

  “Why, sweetie? He’s gone.”

  “To say goodbye.”

  To really say goodbye.

  To see that he was really gone and that everything hadn’t been a dream, but more of a nightmare she would have to live over and over every day. She had to see for herself that Ben, and any traces of h
im, were gone forever. That way, she could torture herself with the knowledge that he was never going to live in this house ever again. It was over. All of it. Forever. Her future. Her heart. Her shot at true love and the life she was meant to have. The life she wanted to have deep down inside her aching heart.

  Ally felt Izzy stiffen next to her before she sucked in a deep breath. “Sweetie,” Izzy said softly, gripping her hand. “I hate to add more shit to your pile…but…Ally, Gram…Gram’s in the hospital.”

  * * *

  Ben plopped down on his new couch and turned on the television. He had some time to kill before he met with his trainer and wanted to veg out for a little while before Vin got a hold of him with his giant meat hooks. The sessions with Vin were exhausting, but he had to admit it felt good to break a sweat and Ben could already feel his body getting stronger. When the season started, he was going to be faster and better than ever.

  Ben was flipping around the channels looking for something to watch when there was a knock at the door.

  “Who could that be?” he mumbled to himself.

  When he put his eye up to the peephole, he saw a petite blonde standing on the other side of the door.

  Hello welcome wagon!

  Ben swung the door open. If this was the welcoming committee, he should definitely consider moving more often.

  “Hi. I’m Courtney.” The petite blonde stuck out her hand and he shook it. “I live across the hall.”

  Courtney was a cute, bubbly blonde with big blue eyes. She was the girl next door type who was now the girl across the hall and she was filling out her sweater nicely. “4F.” She turned and pointed to the number on her door.

  “Hi. Uh…,” Ben stumbled to remember his own name. Ah yes. Ben. “I’m Ben,” he finally managed to say.

  “Well, it’s nice to meet you Ben. I heard you moved in and just wanted to welcome you to the building.”

  “Thanks. Um, I’d invite you in, but--”

  “Oh, no. that’s okay. I’m on my way to work anyway. You should stop by.”

  “Your work?” he asked, a little confused.

  Please don’t tell me she’s a stripper.

  “Yeah. I work at the Hooter’s down on Colorado Boulevard.”

  Of course she did. He should have known.

  “Um, maybe later,” he said, half meaning it.

  “I’ll save some chicken wings for you,” Courtney said with a wink. “See you around.”

  And with that, she spun around and sauntered towards the elevators. Ben couldn’t help but notice that she filled out her jeans just as nicely as her sweater.

  “Welcome to Rocky Mountain View Apartments,” Ben muttered under his breath.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Puck Buddies

  Feeling restless, Ben decided to stop by Coach’s house. Bobby and Nan lived near the Cherry Creek Country Club in southeast Denver. Their magnificent Tudor style custom home had a stucco and brick exterior and Spanish tile roof. Ben had decided to bring Moose over to stretch out in the backyard. The new apartment was working out for the most part, but Moose was used to having an entire yard to himself.

  Aunt Nan greeted them at the door with a hug. Nan was in her mid-fifties with brown hair she wore in a short flippy style.

  “Come in, Ben. You’re just in time for lunch.” Nan waved them through the door and into the two-story foyer with gleaming inlaid oak floors.

  “Perfect timing.”

  “Oh, good, you brought Moose.”

  “Yeah, I figured he needed to stretch his legs.”

  “Are you two doing okay in that little apartment?”

  “We’re good. It’s only temporary.”

  “Honey, I wish you could stay here with us. Lord knows we have plenty of room, but I’m right in the middle of remodeling everything. There isn’t even any furniture in the guestroom right now.”

  “It’s no big deal, Nan.” Ben let Moose out into the backyard. “Is Coach around?”

  Nan made a clucking sound. “Bobby is having lunch with the Blizzards’ General Manager. Your Uncle has been making himself scarce lately. He can’t stand the remodel mess. Oh, but it’s going to be wonderful when it’s all done.”

  “So, tell me about your trip to The Last Frontier.”

  “I’ll do better than that. I’ll show you.”

  Nan led him into the kitchen. Ben sat on a barstool at the kitchen counter while Nan showed him a photo album from their fourteen day Alaskan cruise. She rattled on about the details while making sandwiches.

  “Oh, Ben, it was so beautiful. Between the glaciers and wildlife, my camera was snapping non-stop. Your uncle is mad at me right now, though, because the minute I got home, I hated everything about our house and immediately started remodeling. It seemed so dark and dreary and depressing after being a part of nature for two weeks that I couldn’t stand it. Dark carpeting, dreary paint… When it’s done it’s going to be light and airy.”

  Ben smiled. He didn’t see anything wrong with the way the house was now.

  The doorbell rang and Ben went to answer it. None other than Christian Barnier stood on Nan’s doorstep. Barnie was looking sharp in slacks and a polo shirt with the Blizzards team logo.

  “Barnie!”

  “Hey Benny. I heard you were in town and saw your truck out front so I thought I’d drop in and say hi.”

  “Thanks, Barnie. It’s good to see you again. Come on in.”

  They went into the living room and found a place to sit among the fabric swatches and decorating books.

  “Well, Benny, welcome to the Blizzards.”

  “Thanks. Man. It’s so good to see a familiar face here.”

  Nan came in from the kitchen. “Oh, Christian. It’s so nice of you to stop by. Would you like to stay for lunch?”

  “I’d love to Mrs. P., but I’m headed to a golf tournament.”

  “That sounds like fun. Well, it’s good to see you. I’ve got to go check on lunch.” Nan smiled and went back into the kitchen.

  Ben knew she was just giving him time to catch up with his friend because how did someone ‘check on’ turkey sandwiches?

  Barnie turned his attention back to Ben. “Hey man, you remember my little sister Cameryn?”

  “Vaguely.” Ben tried to remember that far back. The minor leagues were a thousand years ago.

  “Yeah, she was just a kid in pigtails when we were in college. Anyway, she’s flying in to Denver next week. You should come out to dinner with us. I’m trying to round up some guys from the team, but not everyone’s back in town yet.”

  Most of the players had summer houses or traveled back to their home towns during the summer. The team usually started trickling back in to town a couple weeks before training camp started.

  “That sounds great,” Ben said.

  “Cool. It’d be a good chance for you to meet some of the guys before the Captain’s Practice and training camp.”

  “Thanks Barnie. I’d really like that.”

  “No problem. Hey, what happened to that hottie you were with at the Awards in Vegas?” Barnie added as an afterthought.

  “Ally,” Ben said softly and shoved his hands in his pockets.

  “Yeah. She was a knock-out.” Barnie playfully punched Ben in the arm and Ben forced himself to smile.

  “She lives in Red Valley.”

  “Phew. Too bad you let that one get away.”

  “Yeah,” Ben said.

  “Hey, I’ve got to get going.” Barnie got up, walked towards the door and then turned back. “I’m surprised you’re not playing in the tournament. Aren’t you still into golf?”

  “Yeah. Maybe next year.” Sure, Ben could have gone to the tournament to hang out with some of his new teammates, but after spending the summer with mostly females (Ally, Gram, Ruby and Izzy), he was feeling the need to spend time with his aunt. “I’m still getting settled and I have an appointment with my trainer in a couple of hours.”

  “Anybody I know?”

&
nbsp; “Vin Russell.”

  “Ah, man, that guy is hardcore. But awesome. He’s the one who got Jonathan Mitchell back in shape after he broke his leg.”

  “Coach set me up with him and it’s been going pretty good.”

  “Good luck. I think that guy was a drill sergeant in his previous life.”

  “Thanks.”

  They exchanged numbers into their cell phones and Barnie showed himself out. Ben went back into the kitchen to find Nan.

  “That was nice of Christian to stop by,” Nan said, setting a fully loaded turkey sandwich in front of him.

  “Yeah. He’s a good guy.”

  Just when Ben was enjoying himself, and his sandwich, talking about Alaska and the Blizzards and paint colors and fabric swatches, Nan dropped a grenade.

  “We were hoping to meet the young lady we’ve been hearing so much about. What’s her name again?”

  “Ally.” Just the act of saying her name out loud sent a craving through his soul that he knew would never be satisfied. Not anymore.

  “Right. Ally from Cali. How could I forget?” Nan chuckled to herself. “She couldn’t make the trip with you?”

  “No. She has a lot of stuff going on at home and couldn’t come. Her grandmother is ill.” Ben attempted to give his Aunt the abridged version. Minus a failed marriage proposal and several buckets of tears. He knew Nan meant well, but if one more person asked him about Ally he was afraid he would lose his cool.

  “Oh, I’m so sorry. Please send her our love.”

  I will. Just as soon as I can figure out how to send my own.

  * * *

  That evening at his apartment, Ben got up to answer the door. He barely heard the faint knocking over the sound of the latest Call of Duty video game he was playing. The intense fighting game was doing its best to keep his mind occupied on the military and not the battlefield that was currently his own life.