Strolling With The One I Love

by Joan Jonker

  Chapter Twenty

  Monica walked up Kate’s yard the next morning at half-past nine. Seeing her mate at the sink, she rapped on the window. ‘Are yer respectable?’

  ‘Now wouldn’t it be too ruddy bad if I wasn’t, eh? Of course I’m respectable, like any self-respecting woman of my age would be this time of the day. What made yer think I wouldn’t be?’

  ‘Well, the milkman’s got his eye on yer, and yer never know. Even yer best mate doesn’t tell yer everything.’

  ‘I’d have a job to have a secret affair with any man, you living next door to me. I bet yer even know what I had for breakfast.’

  ‘Give us a hard one to test me brain, girl, that one’s too easy. Yer had toast, as yer always do. We can smell it, like you can smell ours. I don’t know why they bothered putting walls between the houses, ’cos we can hear every word yer say, as well as smell the aroma of what ye’re having to eat.’

  ‘At least yer can’t see us with no clothes on when we’re getting into bed.’ Kate wiped her wet hands on a towel hanging behind the kitchen door. ‘Unless yer’ve drilled a hole in the bedroom wall, and I wouldn’t put that past yer.’

  Monica’s throaty chuckle should have warned Kate so she could have put her hands over her ears. ‘If I made a hole in the bedroom wall, girl, it would have been for your benefit. I’m not selfish, and don’t see why you shouldn’t share my nights of passion. Especially when Robin Hood is at his finest.’

  ‘Monica Parry! Yer’ll be the death of me yet, you will. Talk about a one-track mind isn’t in it.’ Kate was shaking her head and her lips were in a straight line, but inside she was chuckling. ‘Don’t yer ever say anything like that in front of John or I’ll die of embarrassment.’ She walked through to the living room, leaving Monica to follow. As she reached to pull one of the dining chairs from the table, she tilted her head. ‘What nights does Robin Hood usually come?’

  ‘Every Saturday.’ Monica sat facing her. ‘Every bleeding Saturday, as regular as clockwork. He’s too tired every other night, or else he’s got to be up early the next day for work. But he’s got no excuse on a Saturday, so I have me wicked way with him then.’

  ‘If the poor man had known what he was getting when he married you, he’d have run a mile.’ Kate leaned her elbows on the table. ‘Anyway, enough of your love life, how did yer get on at Betty’s? Did they like the presents?’

  ‘Greg and Margaret weren’t in, they’ve both gone to work. They need every penny they can get and couldn’t afford to take another day off. They’re saving for a cot and pram, so Margaret is keeping her job on until she begins to show. Betty was made up we bought them presents, but although she was nosy, she wouldn’t open them ’cos she said it would be a nice surprise for them to open the parcels themselves. She said she’d thank you and Winnie herself when she sees yer, but until then I was to tell yer she was very grateful.’

  ‘It was a good day yesterday, wasn’t it?’ Kate said. ‘I really enjoyed meself.’

  ‘Yeah, it was a cracking day.’ Monica cocked her head to one side. ‘Yer know, girl, I was wrong about Winnie, saying she was nothing but a jangler. And you were right about her, she’s a little smasher.’ Her eyes full of devilment, she went on, ‘Oh, I was telling Tom about what she got up to, and some of the things she came out with. And d’yer know what he said?’

  ‘No, what did he say, sunshine?’

  ‘He said to tell yer not to forget to ask her to yer party at Christmas, ’cos she sounds as though she’d make it go with a swing.’

  ‘Aye, and I bet I know who put him up to saying that, soft girl. But it won’t do yer no good, I’m determined it’s your house this year.’ Kate pushed her chair back. ‘Come on, I told Winnie we’d be over the road by ten o’clock. I’d like to be finished by twelve so we can get to the shops before they close. What say you and me do a bedroom each, and Winnie can do the stairs? That shouldn’t take us more than an hour, then we could give her yard and lavvy a good brush and clean.’

  ‘Yeah, it’ll be a doddle with three of us. It’ll give Maggie a break, too, because she’s been tidying up for the old lady and doing her shopping. She’s been a good neighbour.’

  ‘Yes, she’s a good scout is Maggie. She’d be the first one to lend a hand to anyone in trouble, and she’d lend yer her last ha’penny.’ Kate went to untie the back of her pinny, then changed her mind. ‘I may as well keep it on, seeing as we intend to get stuck in over there. No point in getting me dress dirty, is there, sunshine?’

  ‘No point at all, girl, that I can see. Shall we make tracks? The sooner we start, the sooner we’ll be finished. But I’m going to have words with our friend Winnie. I don’t want her volunteering us willy-nilly. I don’t mind Miss Parkinson, because it’s in a good cause, but she could put us down for scrubbing steps or red-raddling window sills the length of the street. If we’re not careful, it could get out of hand.’

  ‘Oh, I don’t mind,’ Kate said. ‘When we get old, we might be glad of someone to give us a helping hand.’

  ‘You and me will look after each other, girl, as long as we’re able. And when we’re not, we’ve got daughters who will see us right.’

  They stepped on to the pavement opposite, and Winnie had the door open before the sound of the knocker had faded away. ‘I’ll say this for yer, ye’re punctual workers. Clocking in dead on time so yer won’t have any money docked out of yer wages.’

  Miss Parkinson looked neat and tidy as always. Her white hair was combed back from her face and rolled into a bun at the nape of her neck, dress immaculate and highly polished shoes so bright you could see your face in them. But she seemed a little flustered. ‘It really is kind of you, but I think it’s asking too much. You have your own homes and families to look after without having me as an extra burden.’

  ‘Nonsense!’ Kate bent down to kiss her cheek. ‘It’s not heavy work, your house is spotless as it is. But seeing as ye’re having a visitor to stay, we’ll give everywhere a good going over and it will put yer mind at rest.’

  ‘Kate is right. If yer haven’t seen yer niece for twenty years, yer want everything to be spick and span. Just imagine if she looked under the bed and saw a pile of fluff. Well, it would put her off, wouldn’t it?’ Monica patted Miss Parkinson’s thin hand. ‘With the three of us, we’ll have it done in no time. We’ll be that quick, if yer blink, yer’ll miss us.’

  ‘I’ve got all the dusters and floor cloths ready, and brushes and buckets.’ Winnie seemed to be in her element. ‘I brought me own brush and mop and bucket so we can get through it quicker.’ She gave a cheeky grin. ‘So there’s no excuse for being held back by lack of cleaning materials.’

  ‘Would you not like a cup of tea before you start?’ Miss Parkinson asked. ‘The cups are all ready in the kitchen.’

  ‘Not just yet, sunshine, thank you.’ Kate spoke for all of them. ‘We’ll get cracking for an hour, then have a tea break. So, let’s get started, girls, all hands to the pumps.’

  Monica gave Winnie a wink and a dig in the ribs. ‘Ay, who made her supervisor? She’s not half pushy, giving orders out. We should have taken a vote on it.’

  ‘I don’t want to be supervisor anyhow,’ Winnie said. ‘Too much responsibility for my liking. And I’m too small anyway. If I gave one of yer an order, yer’d belt me one.’

  Monica gazed at Kate. ‘Right, that leaves you and me. So what’s it going to be? Me on the brush and you on the mop to start with, then we’ll swap over when necessary?’

  ‘Suits me, sunshine, whatever yer say.’

  ‘Ay, what about me? I know I’m little, but I’m not that ruddy little yer can’t see me! Where d’yer want me to start?’ Her chest swelling, Winnie announced grandly, ‘But I have already done the kitchen and pantry. I was up early, so rather than sit doing nowt, I came up and got a head start on yer.’

  ‘We’d be very much obliged, Mrs Cartwright, if yer would do the stairs,’ Kate said. ‘Then after we’ve had a break, we can
see to windows, yard and lavatory. So, come on, heave-ho me hearties.’

  And the three women worked like beavers, stopping only for a cup of tea at eleven o’clock. Maggie Duffy came in when they were halfway through, to see if they needed a hand. But she was told she’d done more than her share and was sent packing.

  ‘I feel really guilty sitting here listening to you doing my work,’ Miss Parkinson told the three women as they stood before her. They had done the house from top to bottom and there wasn’t a thing out of place or a speck of dust anywhere. The furniture and windows were shining, and the hearth and grate cleaned and black-leaded. ‘You’ve worked very hard, I don’t know how I’m ever going to repay you. And I have to tell you that you have put my mind at rest. You see, I last visited my niece over twenty years ago, but I remember she lived in a large house in a very good area. Now, I am not a snob, I really don’t mind her thinking I’m the poor relation, but I would hate her to think I was too poor to keep my home clean.’

  ‘I’m sure your niece is very nice and will certainly not think of you as the poor relation.’ Winnie had known this woman long enough to say what she thought. ‘If she does, then she is not worth bothering with.’

  ‘Celia is far from being a snob, she’s a very sweet and gentle person. And she knows this house because she has been here, so it won’t be strange to her. But I’m sure you’d be the same if you were having a visitor to stay, you’d want the place to look its best. And while I do as much as I’m able in keeping everywhere clean and tidy, age has caught up with me and I find I can’t cope like I used to.’

  ‘If I get to eighty and look like you, Miss Parkinson, I’ll be very happy.’ Kate could see Monica nodding in agreement. ‘Yer don’t look yer age, and as far as I know yer’ve never had any real health problems.’

  ‘No, God has been very good to me. I’ve been blessed with good health and very good neighbours. I can’t thank you enough for the way you’ve worked for the last few hours, I can assure you it is much appreciated.’

  ‘It was done willingly, Audrey, and as long as it gives yer peace of mind, it was worth it.’ Winnie undid the ties on her wrap-around pinny. ‘Maggie’s coming in to see to some lunch for yer so we’ll love yer and leave yer. But I’ll be in again about seven, to make sure everything is as it should be.’ She turned to her two friends. ‘I know ye’re going down to the shops. I’ll nip home with the bucket and things then walk down with yer.’

  Even though they were only going across the street, Miss Parkinson came to the door to wave them off and repeat her thanks. As she closed the door behind her, she sighed. Getting old stopped you from doing so many things, but she was lucky compared to some. Not many women lived to be eighty, so she mustn’t grumble.

  With the mop and brush in one hand, and a bucket in the other, Winnie marched across the road like a soldier going to war. The fact that the bucket was banging against her leg didn’t seem to bother her at all. ‘Well, that’s a good job done, that is.’

  ‘Let me carry the bucket, sunshine, or yer leg will be black and blue.’

  ‘No, I’m going straight home now so it’s not far. I won’t be long, I’ll just tidy meself up and come to the shops with yer. That’s if yer don’t mind?’

  ‘Ye’re as welcome as the flowers in May, girl.’ It took Monica all her time to stop herself from laughing at the little woman who looked so comical. ‘As long as yer don’t bring the bleeding brush and bucket along with yer.’

  ‘I’m making us a cuppa before we go out, sunshine,’ Kate told her. ‘So if yer hurry, yer’ll be in time for one.’

  ‘I’ll be as quick as I can, queen.’ Winnie made as much haste as was possible with the bucket banging against her leg making a clanging sound. They could hear her saying, ‘Sod the bleeding thing. I’ll kick it down the yard when I get it home.’

  Monica went in a pleat. ‘D’yer know, girl, if I could play the spoons I could harmonize with her. And with you making music on yer comb, we could go busking by Lime Street station and rake the money in.’

  ‘I wouldn’t get no tune out of my comb, sunshine,’ Kate said as she opened the door. ‘It’s only got about three teeth left. I keep meaning to buy meself one, but as soon as I put it in the drawer I forget about it until the next time I need to comb me hair.’

  ‘I’ll buy yer one for Christmas. They’ve got them in Woolies in nice cases with a little mirror in. I’ll bring it with me on Christmas Day.’

  ‘I’ll let that pass, clever clogs, ’cos you’ll get fed up with talking about this party sooner than I will.’ Kate went straight through to the kitchen. ‘I’ll see to the tea, but we’ll have to be sharp drinking it or by the time we get to the shops they’ll be closed for dinner.’

  Monica followed her out. ‘I’ll wash me hands and face at yer sink, if yer don’t mind. Me dress will do, no one will see the splashes on it. Oh, and I’ll have to borrow yer comb, even if it has only got three teeth in.’ She cocked an ear. ‘There’s a knock at yer door, girl, it’ll probably be Winnie.’

  As she struck a match and held it to the gas ring, Kate said, ‘Yer’ve made yerself at home getting washed here and combing yer hair, anyone would think it was your house. So yer can go and open the ruddy door for yer cheek.’

  Monica chucked her under the chin. ‘Temper, temper! I’m going, yer don’t have to get all het up about it.’

  Winnie grinned up at Monica when she opened the door. ‘Who’s getting all het up, queen, and why?’

  ‘It’s your mate and mine, Winnie. She thinks I’m taking advantage of her home, but she gets funny moods like that, I don’t take a ha’porth of notice of her. Now, if I was taking advantage of her very handsome and attractive husband, then she’d really have something to moan about.’ Monica gave a cheeky wink. ‘The trouble is, he thinks the sun shines out of her backside.’

  Kate’s head appeared over her shoulder. ‘There’s a pot of tea made, and if it’s not drunk within the next fifteen minutes it’s going down the grid. I’m not missing the shops because you two feel like a gossip. You have been warned.’ With that her head disappeared and Monica leaned down to haul Winnie into the hall. ‘When she uses that tone, girl, she means business.’

  ‘Which shops are yer going to?’ Winnie asked as they reached the main road. ‘I want to nip along to the fishmonger’s. Not to buy anything, like, ’cos I’m off fish while this hot weather’s on even though it is Friday. I want to see the bloke for two reasons. One, to tell him off for selling me rotten fish and making me ill, but also to thank him ’cos that piece of rotten fish has made all the difference to me life.’

  Monica screwed her face up before saying, ‘Let me get this straight. Ye’re going to thank the bloke for making yer ill?’

  ‘Yeah, if yer put it like that, queen. But I’ll tell him off first, ’cos if it hadn’t been for you two, I could have died. And I wouldn’t have liked that.’

  ‘Me and Monica don’t go to the same fish shop as you, and I know yer’ve been going there for years. But yer only ever say “the bloke”, sunshine, yer never call him by name.’

  ‘I think his name’s Bert, but I’ve only ever called him “lad”. He’s nice enough, but he should suffer a bit for what he put me through. He’s got a nose, he should have smelt the fish was off.’

  ‘You go on then, sunshine, and yer can catch us up in Irwin’s, the bread shop or the greengrocer’s. We’ll watch out for yer.’

  When Winnie walked away, she broke into a hop, skip and jump. And as Monica watched her retreating back, she said, ‘It would be worth following her, girl, ’cos I’d like to see how she can tell a bloke off, then in the next breath thank him for the same thing. I think we’re missing a good laugh.’

  ‘Yer’ll have more of a laugh when she’s telling us about it, sunshine, ’cos we’ll get every word and every action. The woman is a born comedienne and doesn’t know it.’

  The two friends were in the greengrocer’s when Winnie caught up with them. They’d j
ust been served with lettuce, spring onions and tomatoes when her face appeared between them. Monica couldn’t wait to be told what had transpired, so she asked, ‘Did yer get it all off yer chest, girl? Tell him everything yer wanted to, did yer?’

  ‘Only half of it, really, queen. Yer see, with it being Friday, fish day, the shop was packed. And I couldn’t talk to him when he was run off his feet, especially about selling me rotten fish ’cos the shop would have emptied in no time. I wouldn’t like to take his livelihood away from him when he’s got four kids.’

  ‘Yer mean, yer went all that way and didn’t say a dickie bird?’

  Kate interrupted. ‘Can we talk outside, please, instead of cluttering this shop up?’

  Monica, impatient as always, marched Winnie outside. ‘Now, am I right in saying yer went all that way and didn’t open yer mouth?’

  ‘Of course I said something, queen, I’m not daft enough to run all that way for sweet bugger all.’

  ‘Oh, that’s good,’ Kate said, ‘what did he have to say?’

  ‘Well, he didn’t say nothing, queen, ’cos he was too busy. So I stood just inside the door and shouted at the top of me voice, “Thanks very much, lad, yer did me a big favour.” And he waved to me.’

  ‘Did yer tell him why yer were thanking him, girl?’ Monica’s mind was working overtime. ‘I mean, if yer didn’t, he’ll be racking his brains all day, wondering what yer were on about!’

  ‘Well, queen, I’ll tell yer how I worked it all out when I saw the shop so full. I didn’t want to stand waiting when I wasn’t going to buy owt so after careful consideration I thought of a way of killing two birds with one stone.’ Winnie hitched up her bosom. ‘If I thanked him and then skedaddled, he’d spend the rest of the day giving himself a headache wondering what he’d done that I’d thank him for. So, yer see, the headache would be my revenge for selling me the rotten fish and making me sick. Don’t yer see, queen, I’ve thanked him and punished him all in one go. Now we’re quits.’