Identity Crisis

by Grace Marshall

  ‘That wasn’t my plan, Garrett. The mousse wasn’t my plan, and now we can’t foresee the consequences of what I did.’

  ‘Kendra, you only did what every writer in that room and all the writers watching from home wanted to do. I can’t imagine the consequences of your actions being anything but good. You were stunning and amazing. And right now I want you so badly I can hardly stand it.’

  For a second Kendra froze, her whole body tensing, her eyes locked on his. The only sound was their heavy breathing above the soft purr of the limo engine. Garrett was sure this was the point at which he got slapped again. He held his breath.

  At last she found her voice. ‘That makes two of us,’ she whispered.

  Before he had time to wonder if he’d heard her right, she scooted and wriggled her way onto his lap, scrunching the skirt of the dress, exposing the silken flesh of her thighs between stocking tops and a gold lace garter belt. He caught a flash of matching panties that were barely there. Then she straddled him, and the heat of her against the uncomfortable expansion in the front of his tux trousers was exquisite.

  His mouth vied for position with the golden pendent in the soft swell of her cleavage. He nuzzled away the silken smoothness of the dress to get to the rounded hillocks of her breasts, far more silken than the dress, high and tight and crested with ripe-fruit nipples that grew impossibly erect at his caressing. And when he took them into his mouth in turn, she gave a little gasp and shivered against him, curling her fingers in his hair.

  Deftly she managed his belt and his fly and shoved up so that her knees supported her on the leather seat either side of his thighs. He wriggled his trousers and boxers down over his hips, releasing himself into the stroke and grip of her hand, which caused an involuntary groan that began low in his belly as he ground his ass against the seat beneath them.

  From somewhere she produced a condom even before he could get to the one stuffed in his pocket just in case. As she rolled it onto him, he pushed aside the crotch of her panties, and she whimpered at his touch, gripped at his fingers as he stroked her open and circled the swell of her with his thumb. Then, with a shifting of her hips, she rose up into position and squatted onto him, settling down tight and wet and sweeter than anything.

  For a second she sat very still atop him, fully impaled, her bright eyes burning into him in the scant light of the limo. Then her lips curled into a bow of a smile and she said, ‘Here’s to Tess Delaney, the winner of the Golden Kiss.’ And she began to shift and undulate against him as he thrust up to meet her like his life depended on it, like he’d never get another chance, like being inside her was the best thing ever, and at the moment, that was pretty much the truth. Kendra Davis riding him hard, surely this must be the end of the world, but he could happily live with that.

  They strained and shifted and grasped, bathed in the strobe of the passing night lights of Portland. The leather seat creaked in the hard friction of expensive clothing and exposed bare flesh, in the grip and release, thrust and stroke of need born of excitement and anger and some sort of wild animal magnetism. They came together, trembling and gasping and holding tight.

  They barely had time to tuck and tidy before the limo arrived at his house. He didn’t ask if she wanted to come in. He wasn’t about to give her the chance to say no, and now that he’d been with her, he was sure one dose of Kendra Davis was nowhere near enough to cure what ailed him. To his relief, no manhandling was necessary. She followed him willingly up the porch steps, offering him a hug and a caress from behind while he unlocked.

  As he opened the door and turned on the light in the foyer, she slid a hand under his jacket to stroke his ass, which had the exact effect on his cock he figured she was aiming for. He turned and trapped her against the door, capturing her mouth with his, cupping the rise and fall of her, delighting in the hard and soft of her. In mid-kiss, she reached behind her, unzipped her gown, and let it slide down her body, almost in slow motion, as though it intended to caress each inch of her bared flesh all the way to the floor.

  She wore no bra, and it was perfect that she didn’t. It would have been such a shame to put any more clothing on those exquisite breasts than absolutely necessary. She stood before him in only the garter belt, stockings and panties, and the gold fuck-me heels that made her legs look like they went on for ever before they joined her body in the scant swaddling of gold and lace. Jesus, she was a sight to behold!

  Still holding his gaze, she removed a gold clasp from her hair and it fell in a cascade of mussed copper around her shoulders.

  He wound a soft fall of curls around his fingers and reeled her in until he could taste her breath, until he could possess her lips and her mouth and her breasts. While he traced the pathway along the well-muscled length of her spine, she shoved his jacket off his shoulders to puddle on the floor next to her dress, never missing a beat in the tango of their tongues. ‘I want to undress you, Garrett. I want to see you. All of you. So hold still.’

  ‘Christ, you’re bossy,’ he grumbled half-heartedly.

  ‘You don’t know the half of it,’ she said as she pushed his hands away from her breasts and deftly undid his bowtie. And he obeyed her. Kendra Davis exploring him, touching him, unwrapping him like he was her Christmas present made the weight already heavy in his groin feel nearly unbearable. And yet it felt way too intriguing for him not to hold on for as long as he could, to hold on for her, until she wanted it all for herself, and he was sure that would be soon.

  She undid his shirt and shoved it off, doing battle with his cufflinks until together they managed to free his arms. Then she suckled and nibbled until his nipples were raw and achingly hard and outrageously sensitive to the air that felt cool against them once they were no longer kept warm by her mouth. But her mouth, led by the scrape and nip of her teeth and the laving of her hot tongue, held his full attention as she nibbled and licked her way down his belly. She paused to probe his sensitive navel with her tongue before she undid his trousers, then squatted in front of him as she eased them down over his hips. He toed off his shoes and there, positioned in front of him, perched on suicide heels, legs open, her face only scant millimeters from his erection, she slid both trousers and boxers off one leg at a time. When at last he stepped free of his clothing, she tossed them aside with the rest of their party finery and cupped him and stroked him until he bit his lip and struggled to hold himself. Then she clasped his butt cheeks in her palms and pulled him to her, taking the heavy length of him into her mouth.

  ‘Jesus, Kendra!’ He sucked air between his teeth ‘I can’t stand that for very long.’

  ‘I bet you can stand it longer than you think,’ she breathed.

  ‘Fuck,’ he said, curling his fingers in her hair. ‘Is this some kind of challenge?’

  ‘Just an observation.’ Her eyes were wide, her pupils dilated, and her cheeks were flushed as she pulled away and slipped off her panties from her squatting position. Then she lay back on the floor and motioned him to her.

  He fumbled in the pocket of his jacket for the condom. This time, she made no attempt to help him, but only lay there watching him, shifting her hips, making sure he knew exactly what she wanted. It didn’t take him long. Then he stretched out on top of her, feeling the silk of her stockings rise along his ribs as she lifted her hips. He cupped her and shifted until there was contact, right where they needed it. They both moaned as he entered her, thrusting, and she wrapped her legs around him, still wearing her shiny shoes, still wearing stockings and garter belt. And she was outrageously warm and wet and needy. She gripped him as though she would consume him, and he rode her as though he might never get another chance. A possibility all too likely, he figured, but he didn’t want to think about that now, not while they were together like this, not while they were reveling in Tess’s success and celebrating their own conquest of a difficult situation. He didn’t want to think about that now, not while there was time to be with Kendra Davis, more vulnerable than he’d ever seen her,
nor would be likely to see her again. He expected nothing else. Just now. That would have to be enough. At least, that’s what he told himself.

  Pizza and beer. Kendra Davis was sitting across from Garrett in the middle of his living room, floor having pizza and beer – totally naked! How could anyone be that unselfconscious? Garrett had pulled on a pair of workout shorts that didn’t do a great job of coverage because he’d been at half-mast and rising ever since they had returned from the Golden Kiss Awards. And yet, it made him feel a little less exposed.

  She didn’t seem to mind him studying her unabashedly while she devoured a huge slice of meat-buster supreme with extra cheese. It was a good thing she didn’t, because he couldn’t keep his eyes off of her. It was easier when they were fucking, he supposed. When he was making love to Kendra Davis, there was no time to think about anything else, no time to be anywhere but the present, and no time to wonder what was going on in the woman’s beautiful head. And, as much as he loved that she was still here with him, hours after what the two had already begun jokingly calling “Blessing the mousse”, Garrett was, at his core, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

  ‘What is it?’ she said, speaking round a mouthful of pizza before she washed it down with a huge swig of beer that would have made any biker proud. ‘What’s the matter, Garrett? I don’t mind you staring at me. I actually like that a lot or I would have put clothes on. But it’s, I don’t know, it’s the way you’re staring at me. I get a feeling it has nothing to do with my tits.’

  ‘Will we regret this in the morning?’ There, he’d said it. The words were out. And even though he was glad it was out in the open, he still felt stupid for saying it. Tess would have had a lot more finesse, no doubt.

  Kendra sat the beer down on the coffee table and wiped her hands on one of the napkins that came with the pizza delivery. ‘It’s already morning, Garrett. Besides, I don’t have regrets. It’s a waste of time I can’t afford.’

  ‘What do you mean, you don’t have regrets? Everyone has regrets. How could we not?’

  This time she studied him, just sitting there completely naked, looking at him as though she had just discovered a new life form.

  ‘I make mistakes, then I learn from them and move on. And looking back …’ For the briefest of seconds, her face darkened and her gaze drifted, as though she saw something Garrett couldn’t see, something she didn’t want him to see. Then she caught her breath and forced a smile. ‘Looking back and dwelling on what’s already past, well, it doesn’t do anyone any good, really.’

  ‘Can K. Ryde teach me how to do that?’ Garrett said. ‘Because I’d really like to know.’

  She offered him a smile that was almost a flinch, then looked down at her hands folded in her laps. ‘K. Ryde, the Ryde Agency, doesn’t exist anymore. Well, not like it did.’ She looked up, her eyes once more unreadable. ‘I sold the company almost a year ago. It’s in competent hands and doing well, or so I hear. Don just happened to have an old email address from my Ryde days, one I’d not deactivated. And since I was already intrigued with why Tess Delaney wanted a PR person with special talents, I brought K. Ryde temporarily out of retirement.’

  ‘You have more secrets than Tess Delaney does.’

  The smile slipped from her lips and she held his gaze. ‘You have no idea.’

  A shiver ran down Garrett’s spine, but before he could think about it, before he could question her further, Kendra pushed aside her plate and moved to sit next to Garrett, settling a kiss against his sternum, between his pecs. ‘Just what part of last night are you planning to regret, Garrett? Tess won the Golden Kiss. You won. And you’ve managed to keep Tess’s true identity a secret.’ She shoved the wild fall of red hair away from her face. ‘Granted, things didn’t quite go to plan, but ultimately I think everyone came out just fine, don’t you?’ She moved to sit in his lap, legs on either side of him, and instantly he was hard. She cupped his face in her hands and kissed him, lingering, caressing with her tongue, with her lips, until he was once again in the happy haze being with Kendra Davis seemed to produce. Then she pulled away enough to meet his gaze. ‘Now, Garrett, tell me what it is you regret, and I’ll see what I can do to make you forget about it.’

  He didn’t, of course. It all seemed pretty irrelevant with an exquisitely naked Kendra Davis wriggling down onto his lap and easing her hand inside the waistband of his shorts.

  Chapter Eleven

  Garrett woke up in bed alone, and a tight fist formed in his stomach. It surprised him how strongly he felt Kendra’s absence. He wasn’t ready for her to leave just yet. He threw back the comforter and shoved his way into the shorts which lay on the floor where he had dropped them not that long ago as he’d followed her in between the sheets, literally joined at the hips. It was only when he heard a clatter from the kitchen that he relaxed – well, not really. Parts of him were very tense with anticipation.

  He found her in the kitchen, leaning against the counter wrapped in his terry robe. She held a Diet Pepsi in one hand, while she scooped coffee into the coffee maker with the other. Her newly red hair hung loose and mussed around her shoulders, and she had that well-slept-with look about her as she smiled up at him.

  ‘Morning, sleepyhead. Thought you might like some coffee.’

  ‘How long have you been up?’ he asked.

  ‘Just long enough for my morning dose.’ She lifted her soda. ‘I figured once you were up we should probably call Don. I’m really surprised he didn’t storm over here last night demanding an explanation, especially since we had our phones turned off. At least, I did, and I figure you did too.’

  Garrett moved behind her and put his arms around her, nuzzling her neck. ‘Talking with Don definitely wasn’t in the plan for the evening.’

  She giggled softly. ‘There was a plan, was there?’

  He slipped his hand inside the robe to cup her breasts, feeling himself harden even further at the press of her stiffening nipple against the glide of his thumb. ‘Oh yes, woman, there was a plan.’ He nibbled her earlobe and she squirmed. ‘I wanted to get inside those golden panties of yours, hopefully without getting slapped.’

  She shifted till her bottom rubbed against his growing erection. ‘You’re a cunning man, Garrett Thorne.’

  ‘And brave,’ he added. ‘Don’t forget brave.’

  She pushed the start button on the coffee maker, then turned in his arms and smiled up at him. ‘If Don had shown up, I’d have sent him packing.’

  ‘God help him if he’d argued with you.’ Garrett said, dropping a kiss onto her ear, then another one onto her collar bone where the robe gaped open, offering an exquisite view of the pale, round rise of her breasts.

  She sighed and gave him a quick kiss, then shrugged out of his grasp. ‘Still, I suppose we should let him know that we didn’t fall off the planet.’

  He took her hand and led her into the living room. His BlackBerry lay on the coffee table where he’d carelessly tossed it last night when his mind was completely taken over by the wonders of Kendra Davis. He’d barely gotten it turned on when it rang. It was Don. Kendra leaned close to hear what was being said.

  ‘Garrett, are you home?’ Don said without preamble.

  ‘Yes. Why?’

  ‘Just turn on the television. Now. Local news.’

  Kendra grabbed the remote and flipped to the news just in time to catch her and Garrett in a very public lip-lock at the Golden Kiss Awards.

  The voiceover was saying, ‘The Golden Kiss Awards ceremony was full of surprises last night. Tess Delaney, notoriously elusive writer of some of the most popular, and hottest, romance novels on the market, made her first ever public appearance on the arm of Garrett Thorne, bad boy younger brother of business tycoon, Ellison Thorne. The two were clearly enjoying each other’s company.’

  There was a close-up of Garrett kissing Kendra’s ear, then her neck, while she smiled and blushed happily.

  ‘Though the odds were not in her favor to take home the cov
eted award against stiff competition, the underdog pulled it off and Tess Delaney took the prize.’

  They watched as Tess’s acceptance speech was played back in full. Even just watching it, Garrett couldn’t help feel a sense of pride, as though he’d actually witnessed Tess Delaney accept the honor. The voiceover went on.

  ‘If Tess Delaney’s big win came as something of a surprise, what happened next was even more of a surprise for the audience, and especially for literary critic and announcer, Barker Blessing.’

  There it was, right there for the whole world to see, Blessing groping and Kendra reacting. Not only was it being played on national television, but it was being played in slow motion with a close-up, first of Blessing’s hand sliding up the slit in Tess’s dress, then of Tess, deliberately and with forethought, emptying her entire bowl of chocolate mousse, whipped cream, cherry and all, right onto the crotch of Blessing’s white James Bond suit. Fortunately, the cameras were too busy capturing Tess’s antics to notice Garrett’s grip on the back of the man’s collar a split second before.

  They watched in high definition, as Garrett took Tess’s arm and escorted her out of the banquet hall to a roar of applause.

  ‘Blessing could not be reached for comment. However, Andrew Day, our reporter on the street, says Tess’s actions have had a knock-on effect that amount to way more than just her first public appearance on the arm of Garrett Thorne and the sharing of her dessert with Barker Blessing. Andrew.’

  The screen cut to a reporter standing in the middle of a huge check-out line in Powell’s Bookstore.

  ‘What we’re seeing here is pretty typical of the five bookstores I’ve visited so far today.’ The reporter turned to a woman in the check-out line who had three Tess Delaney novels clutched to her chest. She explained to him that she had watched the award ceremony and was so intrigued she rushed right to the bookstore this morning. The same interview was repeated with four other people.