Outside The Ropes

by Ashley Claudy

  “I need to see Detective Andres.” Still shivering from the cold outside, I pulled on my book bag straps, redistributing the weight to my other shoulder.

  "Andres? She's on juvenile crime, I think. Hold on." He was talking to himself as he picked up the phone beside him, fingers pressing a few buttons. "Hey Fields, this is Ritter. Is Andres in?" He lifted his chin to me. "What's your name?"

  "Regan Sommers.”

  "A Regan Sommers is here to see her." He sat back in his chair, swiveling it from side to side. "I see. Alright.” He hung up, cracking his knuckles. "You have an appointment? Because she's gone for the day," he questioned with a raised brow.

  I hadn’t thought this through, just stopping by on a whim while running errands. I felt stronger than I had since the attack, and with a little extra pocket money from the pills I dealt with my lost keys. Now, I had my possessions from my locker and P.O. Box in my backpack. Anything of value that I owned was on me. Even as little as it was, I had to fight the urge to cradle my bag in my arms.

  “No, can you just tell her I stopped by. She can reach me at work.”

  “Wait now." He raised his hand. "Someone’s coming down from her office; you can give them the message.”

  "Thanks." I stepped back, standing off to the side of the small lobby.

  Another lady came in, stepping up to the window, and I turned away.

  The heavy security door opened, and an officer in uniform stepped through.

  “Hi, I’m Anthony Fields.” His warm hand shook mine with a firm grip.

  He was a head taller than me, I'd guess six feet with broad shoulders, but his smile put me at ease.

  “Mr. Ritter told me you were here for Detective Andres.” He encased my hand in both of his and took a step closer. “I had to introduce myself. I was the responding officer that night. It’s good to see you now. You have healed exceptionally well.”

  My eyebrow shot up; it seemed an odd compliment. “Um, Thanks.” I pulled out of his grip.

  “Is there something I might help you with? I know you came for Andres, but I’m well informed on the case.” He crossed his arms over his chest, but his unassuming smile stayed on his face, showing off his perfect teeth.

  A little flustered by his attention, I retrieved the card from my pocket and handed it to him. “Some guys came to my work looking for me. They left this card.”

  He nodded as he looked it over. “This guy, Silas Tillman, he was one of the men that found you. His friends called the police.”

  It wasn't till the brick of anxiety lifted from my chest that I realized I'd been carrying it around. I sighed with relief as more questions bubbled in my mind. “Do you know why he would be looking for me?”

  His lips slid into a crooked smile that showed off a cute dimple; I averted my eyes to the floor.

  “Probably the same reason I wanted to introduce myself.” He ducked his head, catching my eyes with his warm brown ones. “It’s hard to see something like that and not want to know how it turned out.” The sympathy on his face made him look young. I had thought he was late twenties, but now I wasn’t sure.

  I nodded, unsure of how to respond to that.

  He handed me the card back. “Was there anything else you needed?”

  “No. Thanks.” I slid the card into my pocket and turned to leave.

  He walked ahead and held the door open for me. I glanced up at him as I passed by. “Thanks, again.” Something about the way he smiled at me made me uncomfortable, but not in a bad way, just unexpected.

  I heard him follow behind me, but peeked over my shoulder to be sure. His smile stretched when we made eye contact.

  “I’m off work now,” he explained, quickening his pace to walk beside me.

  I lowered my head as I jogged down the steps.

  “Where are you parked?”

  “I took the metro.” I pointed towards the station across the street and pulled my hood up on my jacket. The sun sank behind the buildings, turning the sky a dusky pink. I needed to hurry to make it to Nan’s before dark, but Officer Field’s smile had me frozen.

  He tilted his head. “Let me drive you home. Save you a fare and some time.”

  My heart quickened with excitement, but getting involved with a cop was a bad idea. I took a few steps back, still facing him. “That’s okay. I already paid for the day pass.” I waved as I spun away from him.

  “Wait.” He jogged to my side and fell into pace next to me.

  I bit my lip to hide my smirk as I walked to the crosswalk. A part of me, the part that led me into trouble, hoped he would pursue.

  “If you insist on riding the Metro, I’ll ride with you.”

  I whirled towards him. “Why?”

  “Because I have some questions I need answers to.”

  That wiped the smile off my face. Maybe he wasn’t flirting?

  His smile was slow to come. “Like, are you dating anyone? Where do you like to eat? Would you go there with me one day?”

  And my smile was back. I looked at the dimming sun, hating my new fear of the dark. “Would you've really ridden the metro with me?”

  “Yeah, I still will if you want to. But I’d prefer to drive.”

  ***

  "Where to?" he asked as he pulled out of the parking lot.

  There was no way I could show up at Nan's in a police cruiser; I hadn't expected him to take it home.

  “Um, I have to go to work soon. Did you, maybe, want to go get something to eat before my shift?” I attempted a pretty smile, even fluffed my mousy blonde hair for good measure, hoping to appear like I was only flirting.

  “How much time do you have? I need to go home and change if we go out to eat, do you mind?” He stopped at a red light and directed his good boy smile at me.

  Letting go of my nerves about Nan’s, I smiled back with a raised eyebrow. “You’re inviting me to your house already? A little forward Mr. Fields, don’t you think?”

  I laughed as he turned an unexpected shade of pink.

  He looked down at his hands as he responded, “I can’t go out in uniform when I’m not on duty.” He lifted his shoulders, like his jacket was uncomfortable, as he pulled out into traffic. I almost felt bad for teasing him. “But if you have to be at work soon, we can get fast food and eat in the car.” He glanced at me. “Not much of a first date though.”

  I rolled my eyes to the roof. This was a bad idea, now he thought we were on a date. “I have about an hour, let’s go with fast food.”

  We parked behind Johnny’s Restaurant, our meal spread out on our laps.

  I dipped my nugget in sweet and sour sauce, unsure of how to break the silence. We hadn’t done much talking. It was a little awkward sitting in the front of a cop car with an officer dressed in his uniform.

  He cleared his throat. “How do you feel? You look like you’ve healed well, but are you in any pain?”

  I touched the rough scab on my eyebrow. “I'm good. My ribs are still sore.”

  He stretched his arm out and cupped my chin, his thumb gliding over the cut on my lip. “That doesn’t hurt?” His touch was warm and desire clear in his eyes.

  I shook my head and parted my lips, taking his thumb into my mouth. I grabbed it between my teeth and sucked, tasting the salty mix of French fries and skin.

  He sucked air, pulling his hand away as if I'd bitten him.

  The moment had been fueled by lust, but the way he turned pink made me suspect he was new to this game. I couldn’t help but smile at his embarrassment.

  He paused before taking a bite of his burger, his voice strained as he spoke, “I’m glad you’re feeling better. I've been worried about you since that night.”

  I ran my hand through my hair several times; he was obviously trying to ignore what just happened. I would play along for now. “What’s going on with the case and the boys that were arrested?”

  He shook his head and shrugged with agitation. “All four had their arraignment hearing the day we brought them in and p
osted bail. Their court date hasn’t been set yet; the case is still being built against them. I wish I could give you more news, but the system is slow.”

  My insides coiled with disgust and anger; those boys were out free to do what they wanted. “Could you fill in the blanks for me? I don’t remember much of that night.” I looked out the passenger side window at nothing. There was a large brown dumpster in the shadows of the stained brick wall of the restaurant, but I wasn’t seeing it.

  He picked up the remnants of our meal, stuffing it into the bag it came in. “By the time I arrived, Silas had you wrapped in his jacket and you were unconscious. And Gage and Dexter Lawson were with two of the boys responsible.”

  I paused from cleaning up my trash. “Gage and Dexter?”

  He pushed his light brown hair back. “They were with Silas, the guy who gave you the card. I thought they fought the two boys to detain them, but Gage said all he did was catch them running and they gave up. Their bruises had come from you.” He smiled at me and his hair fell back on his forehead. “I was impressed. That was dangerous, and officially I should say you shouldn’t fight back like that, but…” He shrugged.

  I looked at my lap; now it was my turn to be embarrassed.

  “I saw the video the boy we arrested last week had. You yelled, and you tried to run, but you fought when you had no other options.” His fingers were light as he guided my chin to face him, his voice even lighter. “I’ve never seen anything like that, like you.”

  I didn't want to talk about that night anymore. Lust was back in his eyes, and I had the same desire. My heart fluttered in my chest. We weren’t compatible; we came from two different lives. But I could have this moment with him. I had nothing to lose if I acted on the impulse. It’s not like we had a tomorrow anyways.

  Plus, I needed some fun in my life.

  In slow motion, I leaned towards him and our lips met. When he deepened the kiss and swept his tongue into my mouth, I raised myself up and crossed the seat to straddle him.

  His grip on my shoulders tightened and he pulled back. “What? We can’t do this.” But the look in his eyes said otherwise.

  Excitement danced in my stomach as I ducked my head to kiss along his jaw and neck, his stubble rough against my lips and cheek. “Sure we can,” I whispered against his skin.

  His head tilted back and his hands dropped to my hips, gripping them as he sucked in air. I knew he wouldn’t stop me now.

  He continued with the meaningless words, words to make him feel better about this, like he wasn’t expecting it. “You don’t have to do this. This wasn’t my intention.” But his fingers massaged my hips, over my jeans, under my shirt, and his head stayed rolled back, giving me free rein to his neck.

  “Mhm,” I responded as I ground my hips against him. His finger tips pressed into my skin as he tightened his hold. My fingers moved to his belt buckle, undoing the strap.

  His hands left my waist and grabbed the back of my head, pulling me into a hungry kiss. He lifted his hips, allowing me to pull his pants down a little.

  My heart pounded as he released me and slid them to his ankles. He left his boxers on, his hardness peeking through the front flap. The exhilaration of the moment made me light headed but unstoppable. I was close to bursting with anticipation as I stroked the smooth length of him.

  His breathing was shallow as he watched my hand move between us. “This is illegal.”

  I moved off his lap, back to my seat, but kept him in my hands, continuing the up and down strokes. I smiled up at him. “So arrest me.”

  He shook his head, and I dipped down, sucking him into my mouth.

  “Ahh,” he groaned. One hand dipped into the back of my jeans, his other wound in my hair.

  He only let me continue for a few moments before he pulled on my shoulders, bringing me back up to him. He kissed my lips as his fingers moved over the buttons to my pants.

  I slid them off and he rolled on a condom; maybe he wasn't as new to this as I thought. I straddled him once more and he guided my hips over him, sliding inside me. He pulled his jacket around me to cover us up from behind.

  I smirked at the gesture; it seemed pointless, but sweet.

  He pulled on either side of the jacket, pressing me to him, kissing my neck as I rocked on him.

  When his hands glided up my shirt, I pushed them down, keeping him away from my scars.

  He grabbed my hips and moved me faster. I took over the rhythm, muscles straining, and let all thoughts go. Soon he was panting, his orgasm building. He let out a strangled groan as he spasmed beneath me, gripping my arms to hold me still until his body stopped jerking.

  Breathless, I pushed off him and slid back to the passenger seat, pulling my underwear and pants back on. When we were both in order, I opened the door to leave. Reaching for my book bag, I gave him one last look over. Even in the shadows of the evening, he was cute, but I was glad to be leaving. It had been an impulsive and fun moment, but it was over now and I didn’t want to deal with the aftermath.

  “I’ve got to get into work. Thanks.”

  He grabbed my hand before I could back out of the car. “Can I call you sometime?” His brown eyes already muddied with guilt.

  I flashed a lopsided grin and shook my head. “I don’t have a phone. Bye.” I closed the door before he could respond. There was no need to pretend like we were anything more than a one-time thing.

  I jogged with my book bag into the back door of work, leaving my exhilarating afternoon behind me.

  5: I Could Imagine

  “IF YOU CLOSE MY SECTION TONIGHT, I’LL let you have this tip.” Drew lifted the money off the table, holding the bills between the tips of his fingers. He waved it back and forth in front of my face.

  I straightened, with a full bin of dirty dishes, and glanced at his section. He hadn’t cleaned all night; food pieces littered the floor around the tables and all the condiments needed refilling.

  “Twenty dollars to clean this mess.” I turned with my bin, walking back to the kitchen.

  Drew followed me. “Okay, Deal. But you have to sign off on it now. That was my last table and I need to go.” He rubbed his hands together with excitement. “I’ve got a hot date tonight.”

  “Alright, go. I’ll let Johnny know.” I still couldn't serve, and even though bussers are tipped out at the end of the night, it’s not much.

  “You’re the best.” He squeezed my shoulders, and then jogged out of the kitchen, whipping his apron off and tossing it into the wash bin.

  I dropped the dishes off and went to the dining room to clean up Drew’s section.

  “Cleaning up for him again?” Johnny questioned from the bar.

  “Not for free,” I assured, spraying a table down with cleaner.

  He went back to mixing drinks for the few patrons left. It was near closing time and business was winding down. Johnny was the owner, but also tended the large mahogany bar that was the center of the restaurant. He had built it himself and often reminded us of that fact.

  Louisa, Jonny’s wife, was also working tonight. She walked out of the kitchen with a slice of chocolate cake balanced on her tray, dessert for her last table.

  I’d be able to go home soon. I was hoping to hitch a ride with Drew, but now that idea was out the window. Johnny and Louisa lived above the restaurant; they couldn’t drive me.

  I walked back to the kitchen to retrieve the broom and dustpan. The only other worker still on duty was the cook.

  “Hey Marco,” I started sweetly. When he looked up from scrubbing the grill, I continued, “Do you think you can give me a lift home tonight?”

  He tilted his head in apology, and my stomach dropped.

  “Sorry, Regan, I live across the street, so I walk.”

  Walk. The air in the room froze, and it stung to inhale. I was choking. My nails bit into my palm, and I steadied myself.

  I'd call a cab. No need to panic.

  What was wrong with me? I needed to get a grip on this an
xiety. All those stupid therapists I had to see while in foster care should have taught me something; I should be able to cope with this, but my fear of the dark since the attack seemed to be escalating, not improving.

  Still trying to steady the erratic beating of my heart, I went back to Drew’s section to clean and nearly bumped into Louisa.

  “Whoa girl, watch where you’re going.” She grabbed my elbow with care in her eyes. “You alright?”

  “Sorry,” I mumbled, pulling out of her grasp.

  She nodded behind her. “Some guy is asking for you out there.” She walked past me and into the kitchen before I could question her.

  I closed my eyes, inhaling, and went to face whoever was here.

  It took a moment to recognize him out of his uniform, but it was Officer Fields in dark denim jeans and a leather coat. He sat at the bar, watching me walk towards him with a broad smile on his face and his hair styled back in a messy wave.

  I tried to cover my groan and rearrange my face into a smile, but fell short of removing the disapproval from my tone. “What are you doing here?” I questioned low once I was standing in front of him.

  Johnny nodded from the other side of the bar, “Your friend’s here to give you a ride home. Just clean Drew’s section and you can go. Your portion of the tips will be ready tomorrow.”

  Officer Fields raised his eyebrows at me, and his grin widened, daring me to say something.

  “Alright, thanks,” I responded to Johnny.

  I finished cleaning with an odd mixture of excitement and dread. I was glad to not have to call a cab, but I wasn’t looking forward to the pending conversation. That’s not what I signed up for when riding him earlier. That was supposed to be the end of our talking. This was one of those moments where I wanted to punch myself in the face.

  We walked to his truck in silence. He opened the door for me and leaned in a little too close for comfort. I dodged him and hauled myself up into the seat, setting my book bag on the floor in front of me.

  I had been trying to formulate a plan while cleaning, but had come up with nothing.