Carnies and Wildcats: Ulciscor

by Robert Spearman

The caterers came and set up everything for lunch. Marie used the PA and asked everyone to meet in the warehouse for lunch and the party. As everyone assembled, Allen came strolling through the door from the office to the warehouse.

  Marie smiled and nodded in Allen’s direction. Allen smiled in return. There were black bags under his puffy, bloodshot eyes, his cheeks and face were a pale yellow.

  He fell into line behind his employees at the buffet line. He served his plate—only two spoonfuls of any one item. A few employees spoke to him and he managed a few feeble replies.

  Everyone finished eating. The workers sang a few Christmas songs and then exchanged presents. The “gag” gifts were a big hit. This put everyone in a jovial spirit and even Allen managed a chuckle of two.

  With the gift exchange complete, Allen stood, tapped his glass with his pen and cleared his throat. “I want to thank everyone for their determination and dedication to the company,” he began. “This year has been a challenging year for us as a company and for me personally. As you know, we lost my dad earlier in the year. He loved this company and he loved you. This year, you may have questioned my decisions, but I did things I thought were necessary. Necessary to make this business more profitable. Profits are foremost in our company as they ensure our jobs and benefits for the coming year. We are ending the year on a positive note. And because of your hard work I have an envelope in my office for each of you.”

  Everyone’s eyes grew wide and their mouths fell open in disbelief.

  “Two more things. Today is the twenty-third so please make sure your areas are clean and tidy. I don’t want to see you back here until January second. Come back then, ready to work. We have tons to do. I wish you and your families a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year and don’t forget to stop by my office on the way out!”

  The whole warehouse applauded—a few of the older employees became misty-eyed. Some commented that Allen’s speech sounded like Harvey. Everyone rushed around and cleaned the warehouse. Then they moved to their personal areas and stopped by Allen’s office as they left to begin their Christmas holiday.

  Everyone shook Allen’s hand and returned his holiday greeting. A few naysayers grabbed their envelope with a meek handshake and scurried off to take a peek in their envelope. The generous bonuses surprised everyone.

  Marie wanted no chance encounters with him “under the mistletoe” so she hurried and was one of the first ones out of the office.

  Joe Bennett, the warehouse clerk, was the last employee to leave. He closed the warehouse, turned off the lights and locked the doors. He came to Allen’s office to say goodbye.

  “I was wondering if you were here today Joe,” Allen said, handing the last envelope to Joe.

  “I wuz here,” said Joe, “I sho is glad I didn’t miss today Mr. Allen. I just want you to know yo’ daddy would have sho been proud of what you did here today. Merry Christmas, Mr. Allen and God bless.”

  Allen gave Joe a hug.

  “Thank you, Joe. That means so much,” he said. Allen choked back the tears, but they poured from his eyes. Allen turned his face away to keep Joe from seeing. “See you next year Joe. I will lock the office.”

  It was still early in the day. Joe and most of the other employees left the office that day and drove straight to the bank to either deposit their bonus checks or to get them cashed. Most wanted to use their extra money for last-minute Christmas shopping. Marie Seiffert was no exception. She stopped by her bank and deposited her two-hundred-dollar check.

  After the bank, Marie called Martha at her uncle’s office and asked if she wanted to meet and buy groceries for Christmas day. They agreed to meet an hour later at the Publix on Valdosta’s Perimeter Road. They shopped and laughed like two giddy school girls.

  Marie asked Martha about Shorty and they discussed him while they shopped. Martha ended the conversation on Shorty by asking Marie if she “had any fellers in her life?”

  Marie told her “no.” They changed the subject and finished shopping. They drove back to The Ashley in their own cars. Marie called ahead to her brothers and told them to meet them downstairs to help carry the groceries up to their uncle’s apartment.

  The boys were standing out in the parking lot when they arrived. Patrick and Dwain, both shivering from the winter cold. Everyone grabbed several bags, crossed the street to The Ashley and took the service elevator. They entered through the back door of Lewis Seiffert’s apartment.

  Lewis Seiffert was sitting at his desk. The bookcase “door” between his office and the residence was open. He heard the ruckus as they entered the apartment and had spotted them on the camera in the freight elevator. Seiffert finished a few things on his computer and walked into the residence.

  He greeted everyone with a warm smile and a hello and inspected the grocery bags.

  “Eggnog?” he asked.

  Marie reached into a bag and pulled out a carton. She handed it to her uncle.

  “Happy now?”

  “Happy, happy.”

  “You will not believe what happened at work today.”

  * * *

  Jimmy Miller was not sure how to dress for dinner or if he needed to bring a present. He opted for business casual—a dark blue, wool jacket, an Oxford shirt without a tie and khaki pants. For the gift, he walked to one of the downtown liquor stores and bought a bottle of Chardonnay.

  Jimmy arrived at Seiffert’s office and before he knocked, Seiffert opened the door.

  “Come in, come in,” Seiffert said. Jimmy handed Seiffert the bottle of wine and Seiffert thanked him.

  Seiffert wore a red, crushed velvet blazer over a white dress shirt. Jimmy mused that Seiffert’s bald head and fat jowls made him look like Santa on chemotherapy. He detected a hint of alcohol on Santa Seiffert’s breath.

  Jimmy followed Seiffert into the office. Jimmy took a deep breath—he smelled the furniture’s old leather mixed with the mouthwatering scent of roasted turkey. He looked but couldn’t find the origin of this divine aroma. Jimmy’s nose twitched and Seiffert laughed. He pressed the remote and the bookcase slid open, revealing the apartment.

  “Come with me,” he said to Jimmy. Seiffert walked across the threshold into the apartment, the door slid closed behind them.

  Jimmy eyes widened, not at the secret bookcase door—he had always dreamed of having one—but at the size and extravagance of Seiffert’s apartment. Seiffert motioned for Jimmy to have a seat. Jimmy sat and looked around the room.

  “Care for a drink?” asked Seiffert.

  “Sure,” Jimmy replied. “Scotch and water with a little ice please.”

  Seiffert was less precise in his speech and his movements than in earlier meetings. The Christmas spirit, or spirits, had loosened him.

  Seiffert came back with a scotch tumbler in his hand and handed it to Jimmy.

  “You guys come in here and let me introduce you to Jimmy,” he shouted over his shoulder.

  Dwain, Patrick, Marie, and Martha emerged from the kitchen and Jimmy stood to meet them. Jimmy recognized Patrick as the bartender from the downstairs pub. “This is Dwain and Patrick, they are my nephews. Next, is my niece, Marie. And then Martha, she is an old family friend and my secretary.”

  Jimmy shook hands with everyone. He gave a nod of recognition when he shook Patrick’s hand. When he shook Marie’s hand, he paused for a second longer. Her beauty mesmerized Jimmy. Her auburn hair and the green eyes made the back of his hands itch. Jimmy realized he had paused and stared too long. He turned to Martha.

  “Secretary?” Jimmy asked, turning to Seiffert and still holding Martha’s hand. “I don’t remember you having a secretary.”

  “Oh yes, she works with me in my sixth-floor office,” Seiffert said.

  Jimmy gave a puzzled look.

  “Stop by next week and I will show you,” Seiffert said. “Suite 601.”

  Jimmy nodded. Jimmy sat again and Seiffert joined him. The rest of the group returned to the kitchen.

  “So, Jimmy, th
at’s my family and what about your family? We meet, discuss business and I forget my manners. We didn't get acquainted properly and I need to apologize for that,” Seiffert said.

  “That’s okay,” Jimmy said. “My mom died ten years ago and my father passed five years after that. I’m an only child, so except for an uncle, an aunt, and their children, you could say I’m an orphan.” Jimmy smiled and said, “You said you knew my father.”

  “Yes.”

  Jimmy waited. His inquisitive eyes asked the question “and?” Seiffert couldn’t avoid Jimmy wanting to know more.

  “Your father did me a good turn once, twenty-eight years ago. Let’s just say back in those days the Lowndes County Sheriff’s Office didn’t want to help a guy like me. Your dad was a kind and compassionate man. He took it upon himself to assist me,” Seiffert said.

  “So what happened?” asked Jimmy.

  “Oh Jimmy that was a long time ago and a sad time for me and my family. Tonight is the night of making merry and celebrating life. Let’s not dwell in the past,” Seiffert said and raised his glass. “Here’s to the future.”

  Seiffert lifted his glass and Jimmy returned the toast. Jimmy wondered how his dad had helped Seiffert.

  Martha came in, breaking the silence. “Are you two gonna sit here like knots on a log or are you gonna come eat?”

  Everyone waited in the dining room for Seiffert and Jimmy. Everyone took a seat. Seiffert stationed himself at the head of the table, Martha sat at the other end and the boys sat together. Jimmy and Marie sat next to each other.

  Martha opened Jimmy’s bottle of Chardonnay and another bottle of wine. Filling the table was a huge, carved, roasted turkey, and baked ham. Plates and bowls of vegetables, soufflés, and casseroles surrounded the turkey and the ham.

  They chatted, laughed and ate. Jimmy tried to remember a Christmas gathering better than this. Everyone was happy. They continued to eat and drink and opened two more bottles of wine. Finally, Dwain announced “I’m stuffed” and the others laughed and agreed.

  Two photos hung on the dining room wall. One was of Seiffert’s wife and young daughter the other of Marie, Dwain and Patrick’s mother and father.

  Seiffert stood and went around the table and filled the wine glasses. He raised his glass to the photos and said, “We will never forget you.”

  The others replied with a “here, here” and sipped from their wine glasses.

  Jimmy, infatuated with Marie, had chatted with only her during dinner. It surprised him to learn that she worked at Ridley’s as Allen’s secretary. He was sure that Marie’s employment there was part of Seiffert’s grand scheme.

  After the toast, Jimmy helped Marie and Martha remove the dishes from the table. Martha scolded him and told him he should go to the den and hang out with the “menfolk.” Jimmy objected. Martha could tell from the way he was watching Marie that he was helping just to spend time with her.

  They finished clearing the table and Jimmy continued to follow Marie around like a puppy. Martha loaded the dishwasher and Marie covered the last of the leftovers with plastic wrap. Some she placed into the refrigerator, others she left on the kitchen counter to cool.

  Marie filled her glass with wine again and filled Jimmy’s. “Follow me,” she whispered to Jimmy and he followed her into the kitchen and out to a small, outside patio. The view from the terrace was not spectacular—it overlooked the parking lot across the street and the roof of Brambley’s Hardware.

  They both sipped their wine in silence, their noses and mouths exhaled cold fog into the air.

  “Nice meeting you tonight,” Jimmy said.

  “Same here,” replied Marie.

  “I…um…would like to spend more time with you…under different circumstances,” he said, stuttering.

  She kissed Jimmy on the nose and he blushed.

  “That would be great,” she said.

  She sensed Jimmy’s awkwardness and took the lead. “I don’t want to be too forward or aggressive, but my uncle tells me you’re staying in the building. Let’s move our little party to your apartment and watch TV or a movie.”

  Jimmy, relieved and shocked, replied, “Well let me say goodbye to everyone and you come whenever you finish here. I’ll be waiting. The apartment is on the fifth floor, number 507.”

  She smiled and kissed his nose again—he blushed again.

  “Okay. Do you have wine or should I steal a bottle from here?” she asked.

  “I have a bottle down there, but it’s not as good as your uncle’s. It’s up to you.”

  He walked to the door and opened it for her to enter. She shook her head. “I think I’ll stay out here for a second.”

  Jimmy said goodbye to Dwain, Patrick, and Martha and then thanked Seiffert for a great evening. Seiffert reminded Jimmy to come visit him in the sixth-floor office. Seiffert showed Jimmy the apartment’s back entrance and told Jimmy how to find the elevators.

  No one was surprised when Marie entered the living and told everyone her plans of going downstairs to spend more time with Jimmy.

  Marie kissed her uncle on the cheek. “Thanks for a wonderful evening Unc. And turn off the smoke detectors in Jimmy’s apartment.” They laughed. They all knew what she meant.

  Martha followed Marie in telling everyone goodbye. She announced that she had to get home. “Shorty is coming in tomorrow and staying with me through New Year’s day. Lewis, leftovers are in the fridge. Now don’t go eatin’ them all tomorrow and they’ll last you for a few days. You’re gonna need to fend for yourself ‘cause I don’t want to see your bald mug again until after the first.” She gave Patrick and Dwain a hug, kissed Seiffert on his bald head and left.

  * * *

  Jimmy rushed downstairs to clean and straighten his apartment. He tidied the living room, bathroom, and kitchen and was loading the dishwasher when Marie knocked. Jimmy ran through the apartment and gave everything one last look. Out of breath, he opened the door.

  “Wow, from the sound of your heavy breathing it sounds like you’ve started without me,” said Marie, laughing.

  Jimmy laughed with her. Marie looked around the apartment. She glanced at the ceiling trying not to be too obvious as she attempted to locate the smoke detector. Marie handed Jimmy a bottle of wine and asked Jimmy to go open it. While Jimmy opened the wine in the kitchen, she found the smoke detector. Marie shook her head while wagging her finger at the smoke detector. It had two lights, one red, and one green. The green light went out and Marie chuckled to herself.

  Jimmy came back with the opened bottle of wine and two wine glasses. He walked toward the couch and Marie followed him. They both were tipsy so they fell into a slouch on the sofa instead of sitting upright. Once they sat up straight, Jimmy leaned over and kissed her. Marie responded to his kiss and they held each other and kissed for what seemed like hours.

  Jimmy’s hand grazed Marie’s breast—a light, innocent touch. Marie pushed Jimmy’s hand away.

  “Sorry,” stammered Jimmy.

  “No, Jimmy, don’t worry, it’s okay. Things are moving a bit too fast and I’m more than a little drunk. Let’s spend time together first and see how it goes from there,” she said. She gave Jimmy a kiss on the cheek.

  “I understand,” said Jimmy, his face turning red. He straightened his clothes and sat more upright on the couch.

  Marie’s fingers tickled his neck. “Now don’t go getting silent on me.”

  “Okay,” he said. “Then tell me something.”

  “Okay, what’s that?”

  “What has your uncle got against Allen Ridley?”

  Jimmy’s question shocked her. Marie debated on whether to answer Jimmy’s question. Marie stared at her wine glass—she wanted to tell him. The wine gave her the courage she needed to tell the secret the Seifferts had carried for so long.

  Jimmy noticed her hesitation. “It’s okay if you don’t want to tell me,” Jimmy said.

  “No, I will tell you. First I need to go to the bathroom. Why don’t
you be a sweetheart and show me where the bathroom is and grab me a glass of water?”

  Jimmy showed her the bathroom adjoining the master bedroom and went to the kitchen to get her water. Marie finished in the toilet and looked at the smoke detector in Jimmy’s bedroom—the green light was off. She gave herself a tour of the rest of the apartment and checked the other smoke detectors, green lights all off. Marie came back into the living room—glanced into the kitchen—no green light there either.

  Marie joined Jimmy back at the sofa. He sat looking at his cell phone. Jimmy put the cell phone on an end table and handed her the glass of water. She took a big swallow, waited for a second, and took another.

  “I’m not sure where to start,” she said and rubbed her eyes. “I gotta tell you, this happened when I was nine. Most of it, I remember like it happened last night and the rest is what my uncle, my parents, and Martha told me. Marie sighed and started:

  “Uncle Lewis, my parents, and Martha were carnival workers. You call them ‘carnies.’ We call folks like you ‘rubes’ or ‘townies’ but that’s not important. Uncle Lewis owned the carnival, but he had a sideshow act too, a hypnotism act. Townies would come and he’d hypnotize them. Make them do strange and crazy things—imitating animal sounds, taking off their clothes, anything funny or embarrassing.

  “Lots of folks assumed it was fake, a staged act. They believed carnies posed as ‘hypnotized’ townies just to sell tickets. Trust me though, it was real. It takes Uncle Lewis a matter of seconds to put most people under. He has the talent and the ability.

  “It was all his—the rides, the games, and the sideshow attractions and was one of the biggest fairs in the Southeast. Every year it traveled the circuit. After the winter, they worked their way up the west coast of Florida starting from Tampa, up Highway 19 and made stops in Chiefland, Cross City, Perry, and Tallahassee. From Tallahassee, they turned west and stopped in cities in the Florida panhandle, going as far west as Panama City. They turned north through Alabama and into Georgia, with more stops from Macon to Valdosta and then to Gainesville, Florida. Gainesville was their last stop before heading back to Tampa and resting for the winter.