by Lexie Miers
I’d spent the last few months thinking over every little detail of the case. I tried to think back to any moment I’d spent with Katie... all our interactions, trying to figure out if there was something, anything, that I’d done that would make me guilty.
I knew guys that took advantage of women, bad guys.
But that just wasn’t me.
You could call me a workaholic, lazy around the house, and emotionally cold. But not this.
I respected the women I worked with and would never put any of them in a situation where they felt uncomfortable or disrespected.
But my word wasn’t enough, clearly.
It didn’t matter if I was a respected expert in my field, who’d never taken a wrong step. People tended to forget about all the good things you’ve done in your life and they loved gossip.
Still, I wasn’t going to let her win.
I couldn’t.
I understood why Morgan advised me to keep my distance from Cass. After all, she was an employee at Morgan and Eric’s firm. The firm that represented me.
Hadn’t thought that one through when I’d gotten her the job.
I also didn’t want Katie’s lawyer to see us together and find out that we were...
My thoughts stopped abruptly. What were we, exactly?
We’d slept together last night, but that was really all there was. And as much as I wanted to think that we had a future together, I also had to accept that it might not happen.
It had been a spur-of-the-moment moment passion for us both. And it had left us with unexplained feelings and unanswered questions, all of which could not be ignored if there was any hope of us reconciling.
Maybe I should explain to her that we needed to put our relationship on hold for a while. But there were issues with that. She’d think I only wanted to be with her on my terms, and that wasn’t going to sit well with her.
I couldn’t afford to hurt her again, but I also couldn’t provide her with a future if I didn’t have one to offer.
There was nothing else I could do. Not until the trial was over.
I went home, exhausted and frustrated.
I heard my phone buzz a few times and groaned aloud. It was probably Cass, but I didn’t have the strength to talk to her at that moment.
I ran my hands over my face as I collapsed into my recliner. I wanted to talk to her, but I knew that I’d be curt with her, and she didn’t deserve that.
My house was dark, as it always was. I dropped my keys down on the lamp table beside me, along with my phone and wallet.
I need to get out of these clothes.
I forced my tired body to stand and walked to my bedroom. I slipped off my jacket and my tie, draping them over the backrest of the couch as I moved past.
Running my fingers through my hair, I let out a miserable sigh as my phone buzzed again. She didn’t let up, did she?
Guilt tightened my gut.
Instead of answering, I ignored the messages and took a shower. I closed my eyes beneath the steaming hot water and hoped my troubles would wash down the drain.
When I climbed out of the shower, I slid on a pair of comfortable track pants and a t-shirt. I reheated some leftovers that were in the fridge and grabbed a beer.
Fuck knew I deserved it.
Actually, I deserved a whole liquor store.
I sat down on the recliner and ate my dinner, catching up on the sports news of the day. I’d always been a fan of basketball and football, ever since I was a kid, watching it with my dad. Father-son bonding times happened on our old black couch in the living room.
I missed the old man.
Maybe I should call him tonight? I needed a bit of guidance, fatherly advice.
I finished my beer and my dinner, then grabbed my phone.
When I sat back down on the couch, I dialed my father’s number.
“Hey, son,” my dad’s voice sounded over the phone.
“Hey, Dad. How’re things going?”
“Good, buddy. Your mom’s planning a trip down to Denver at Christmas if that’s okay,” my dad said.
“Of course, Dad. That’ll be nice. It feels like forever since you guys came to visit.”
“It’s not like we get invited, or anything,” my father joked.
“You know you and Mom are always welcome.”
My father scoffed and said, “Oh, we wouldn’t want to impose on your big city life.”
I rolled my eyes up to the ceiling and ran a hand through my hair. “It’s not as glamorous as you think. I’d much rather be sitting on that black couch in your living room, drinking beer and watching football.”
“Is everything okay?” my father asked. “You sound... off.”
I rubbed my eyes with my free hand. “There’s been a lot of things happening.”
“Besides the lawsuit?” he asked and my stomach tightened. I hated that my parents had to deal with the lie that I was some sort of sexual predator.
“Yeah.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Yep. I do.
“I saw Cassidy a few days ago.”
“Cassidy Moore?” The surprise in my father’s voice was obvious.
“Yes, that’s her.”
For some reason I’d thought my dad would forget who Cass was, but then again, she was kind of unforgettable.
“You haven’t spoken about her in a while. How is she?”
“She’s great. She just got a job at Eric’s firm as a paralegal. She’s just as beautiful as the last time I saw her.”
“And? How’d it go seeing her again?”
I shifted in my seat and shrugged my shoulders, even though my dad couldn’t see me. My dad knew the complicated history with Cass and me, as well as the circumstances around how everything ended. He also knew how much it broke me, leaving her.
“It was... strange. We talked, we went out to dinner downtown, then we took a walk. Everything felt exactly like it did before. It started to rain so we ran for cover and ended up at a small hotel.”
“Liam—”
By the tone of my father’s voice, he already knew exactly what had happened.
“I know what you’re thinking, Dad. It was most probably a mistake, a big one, but everything I felt for Cass is still there and seeing her again made it come back even stronger.”
“So, what are you going to do about it?” My father’s question took me by surprise and I inhaled slowly, because I didn’t know the answer to it.
“Right now... I can’t do anything about it. Morgan told me to keep my distance from her until the lawsuit’s settled. I don’t want people to think I’m a scumbag.”
My father scoffed and cleared his throat. “Does Cassidy know that you’re doing this?”
“Dad, I can’t just tell her-”
He cut me off. “Liam, she deserves to know the truth.”
I groaned and put my head back against the head rest, and looked up at the ceiling. “She’s going to think that I’m full of shit.”
“And if you don’t tell her, then you are,” my father pointed out.
I could see him sitting at the kitchen table, a cup of black coffee in his hand, dishing out wisdom like only he could give. He was one of the wisest people I knew, and not because he was my father. Even though he’d never tell me outright to do something, he’d always gently guide me into finding the right path.
I gathered the courage to admit what I was really worried about. “Either way, I’m screwed.”
“Do you love her?”
I froze. Did I? A lot of time had passed between us, but... “Yeah, I do.”
“Does she know that?”
I paused for a moment too long. I’d always thought she knew how I felt, but from her reactions yesterday, I realized that was not the case.
“You should tell her, Liam. And if she still loves you, it won’t matter if you’re going through a tough time, have a lawsuit against you, or anything like that. That’s the best thing about love. It’s
not conditional of circumstances.”
I closed my eyes. “Thanks, Dad.”
“You’re welcome, buddy.”
“Tell Mom I send my love.”
“Of course. She’s at Rhonda’s, next door. I’ll give her the message.”
“Thanks, Dad. I can’t wait to see you guys. I really miss you.”
“We miss you too, son. Keep your head up, okay?”
“I’ll try my best, Dad. Bye.”
I lowered the phone as soon as I heard the call disconnect and a wave of nostalgia crashed over me. I really missed my parents.
They were only a few hundred miles away but it sucked that I couldn’t see them as often as I liked because I was so busy with work. I hated to think of them all alone in their house in Crested Butte, the same house I grew up in, the same house Cass and I spent many afternoons and nights in.
At times I wondered what my life would have been like if I had stayed in there. Would Cass and I have gotten married, had a family? Would we have still lived there, or would we have settled somewhere else? Would we have split anyway since our dreams were too far apart?
A sudden banging on my front door sent me back to reality. I jumped up from the couch and walked to the front door. I opened it slowly, not sure what to expect on the other side of the door.
“Cass? How’d you find me?”
“You’re listed!”
Cass stood in front of me, her blue eyes wild and angry. I immediately stepped to the side allowing her to enter, but she just stood there, her breathing a little strained.
“Do you want to come in?”
She pushed past me and I closed the door. This was going to be interesting.
I followed her to the living room and she whirled around.
“What the hell is going on with you, Liam?”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“You know exactly what I mean, you asshole! You practically beg me to give you a second chance and stupidly I did! We have a great night, you fuck me at the hotel, then ignore my calls and messages all day. Do you know how fucked up that is?”
She was panting for breath and if she’d been a cartoon, smoke would have been billowing out of her ears.
“Wait, Cass,” I said, holding my hands up in defense. “If you let me explain—”
“Was last night a mistake?” she exclaimed.
“It’s not like that,” I muttered as I stepped away from her.
“Then what is it like, Liam?” she asked, but I still couldn’t look at her. “I spent the entire day trying to call you, I messaged you that I wanted to talk and that it was urgent, yet you still ignored me.”
“Cass—”
“Do I mean so little to you that you think you can just use me like that?”
Don’t put it like that. “Cass, I didn’t use you.”
“It sure as hell feels like it. If it was such a big mistake why didn’t you just say so yesterday? Why didn’t you stop before things went as far as they did?” she asked.
The room went quiet and I slowly turned to her. “You mean a lot more to me than you think you do, Cass.”
The fight seemed to go out of her as her shoulders slumped. “Then why the silence? I had to lie to my brother as to why I was constantly checking my phone,” she told me. “I don’t lie to my brother, Liam.”
“I know.”
“Then what the fuck?” she repeated in frustration.
“I thought about you every single moment of the day.”
It was the truth.
Cass raised an apprehensive eyebrow at me and crossed her arms. “Oh, really?”
I was going to have to come clean, and that meant spilling the truth about everything.
Chapter Nine
Cassidy
I was so angry I was digging my nails into the soft flesh of my palms.
I wanted to scream, throw things, curse up a storm.
And the way Liam kept glancing at me, with his gentle eyes and sad frown wasn’t doing me any favors.
Focus, Cassidy.
“Yes, really,” he said with a nod. “I was in court all day today.”
Guilt instantly sliced through my belly. Here I was, throwing a tantrum because he wasn’t calling me back when he literally couldn’t.
Shame on me.
“Liam, I’m so... sorry,” I stuttered. “I didn’t know. How’d it go?”
“It was only the first day, but it got pretty rough. It’s shit when people try to dig up every shred of dirt they can on you, trying their hardest to discredit me and ruin my reputation.”
“I’m so sorry,” I whispered.
I wanted to cry! After such a whirlwind day focused solely on my feelings, I’d believed all the bullshit my paranoid brain had thrown at me.
“That’s why I didn’t call you back. I had to focus my energy on the case, saying the right things, behaving the right way. Today was one of the worst days of my life, if I’m honest.”
My shoulders slumped as I approached him. I didn’t know what to say to him but at that moment, words were not what was needed.
I placed my hands on his shoulders and pulled him close. It took a few seconds for him to hug me back, but as he lowered his hand onto my shoulder, I could feel the pain he was in.
I knew how that felt, to be defeated. Bereft.
I’d experienced it myself, more than once. After he’d left me, after my mom had died, after Nathan’s accident, after all the bills piled up.
All the bad things that had happened to me began when Liam had left. When he hadn’t been part of my world, and it made me wonder, was he the key to my life?
The integral part that I needed to function? It seemed pathetic that I needed a man in my life to be happy and successful.
I would never admit that thought to anyone, especially not to him, but maybe it was partly true? I didn’t know.
What I did know, was that I needed him, more than I’d ever admitted to myself, but there was a part still holding me back. The uncertainty of what had made him leave so suddenly ten years ago.
I still didn’t know why things had gone down that way.
Hopefully, he’d clear it all up... and soon.
His fingers raked softly and slowly through my hair, sending waves of desire flowing through me, one after the other. Goosebumps covered every inch of my body and his muscles relaxed beneath my hands.
This was what I could be for him, and him for me.
A safe place, somewhere I could hide away from the world when things got too much to bear. And I could be that for him.
We used to be that for each other. I would seek refuge at his house when my mother’s stupid boyfriend would visit. Luckily, he was only a part of our lives for three years before he left.
I wasn’t trying to kill the mood by thinking about the past, but after the day I’d had, I was struggling to keep my mind on the right track.
So, I was grateful when Liam’s hands slipped under my shirt and all the thoughts fell away.
I glanced up at him and met his gaze, I didn’t want to hold back any longer.
I kissed him, with all the longing in my soul.
There was no more anger inside me or resentment. Only an uprising of old feelings, and there were a lot of them.
Tears welled in my eyes and my chest tightened. It wasn’t surprising why I had bottled them up over the years.
They were intense.
As Liam kissed me, I began to tug at his shirt. I wanted to feel his skin beneath my hands. I wanted him naked.
He relaxed his arms, allowing me to take off his t-shirt. He was in great shape and I loved the look of his chiseled body. I reached out and lightly grazed my fingers down his chest, all the way to his abs.
I sighed. Being able to touch him like this, with so much freedom, was blissful.
His strong arms wrapped around me and I tugged off my own shirt, feeling the warmth of his skin against mine.
He kissed me again, long and hard, making my head
spin. Then he scooped me up in his arms and carried me up the stairs, down a hallway and into his bedroom.
I got a quick look around his adult bedroom, so different from the one he’d had ten years ago.
He lay me down on his bed, which was so much softer and more comfortable than the bed we’d shared at the hotel, then he lay down beside me and I felt something click inside my chest. Like a piece of a long forgotten puzzle. Finally, complete.
I’d come home.
We undressed each other slowly, like it was our first time again.
Everything was different.
Liam kissed my lips and my eyes slid shut as his hands explored my body and I allowed mine to explore his.
The feeling of his muscles moving under my touch sent shivers of delight through me. I was already wet for him, and I heard the hitch in his breathing when he ran his fingers down my thigh.
He looked up and met my gaze with his own, the heat I saw burning there turning me on more than anything.
He circled my clit with his finger, then added pressure, making me gasp. My whole body was igniting the more he touched me. I could practically hear the fireworks exploding in my mind.
I arched my back, silently willing him to take it one step further. To go deeper. Thankfully, he read my need and positioned himself above me. I ran my fingers lightly down the shaft of his cock and watched as his entire body tensed.
He paused for a moment letting me stroke him, then he slid his long cock inside me. The sensations were amazing and my breath caught in the beauty of the moment.
I’d never felt like this before. My heart squeezed with love, with awe... at the sensuality of having him against me, inside me.
My lips parted so that I could breathe as he filled me up as only he could.
His rhythm began, slow and steady. This was the way it was supposed to be with him. This wasn’t only a physical act anymore. This was something more, and I could practically see the emotions in his clear, green eyes.
He began to quicken his thrusts so that the pleasure inside my belly began to build. I reached up for him, wanting him closer. He lowered his torso towards mine, kissing my neck and my chest.