Sick

by Tom Leveen

  We make eye contact.

  “I know what you’re thinkin’,” Chad says abruptly.

  I sit down beside him, with Cammy on his other side. “What’s that?”

  “That I’m gonna end up like Hollis.”

  I don’t respond. Cammy stops playing the game and watches us both.

  “First sign of trouble, and I’m out,” Chad says. “Okay? Take those platforms down, and I’ll head out. That’s it.”

  “Actually, I had something else in mind. Come back to the office with me.”

  Chad shakes his head. “Dude—”

  Soft footsteps echo in the hall, and Kenzie appears from around the corner.

  “Brian?”

  “Yeah, sis.” I get up and go over to her, moving some of her hair out of her face. That gesture reminds me of the girl from the library who got left behind. Who got worse than left behind. Red fingernails, long blond hair.

  It could have been Kenzie.

  It might be Laura.

  I swallow hard and hug my sister close. She squeezes me back.

  “I’m okay,” she says suddenly. “Brian, I’m fine. I’m still here.”

  She said the same thing after waking up from the transplant. I hug her even closer.

  “I know,” I say. “Go back to the office, okay? We all need to talk about some stuff.”

  “Okay.” Kenzie starts to go … then stops, walks over to Chad, and plants a gentle kiss on his cheek. “Thanks for coming after me,” she says.

  Chad doesn’t move. “Yeah,” he says.

  “Meet us in there, like, soon,” I tell Chad. “All right?”

  “Sure, Bri. Whatever.”

  Then Chad calls my name just as I reach the turn in the hall.

  I send Kenzie on to the office, then come back to my friend.

  “What?” I ask.

  Chad is still. Motionless.

  “My back’s startin’ to hurt,” he says in a monotone. “Just thought you should know.”

  My guts shrivel up.

  Chad inhales deep through his nose. “I’ll keep you posted. It ain’t bad yet. You just take care of your sister. And if for one second you think I’m gonna hurt someone, you kick my ass straight out. Cool?”

  “Uh … sure, man.” I look down at Cammy. “How you holding up?”

  “Comme çi, comme ça,” Cammy says.

  “Is that French for ‘Shut your ass, Brian’?”

  Cammy grins. “Close enough.”

  “Listen,” I say, “I’m … sorry. About Hollis.”

  Her grin evaporates. “Yeah,” she says. “Me too. Sorry about Laura.”

  My body jolts. “Sorry? About what?”

  Cammy blinks at me, like she’s trying to backpedal. “Well … that she’s still out there somewhere. That’s all. I’m sure she’s fine, Brian.”

  Adrenaline dumps into my stomach. Every nerve ending in my body lights up.

  “Well, I’m getting her out of here,” I say, and it comes out a lot more angry than I meant it. “All right? We’re all getting out of here.”

  “Sure, okay,” Cammy says, raising a palm. “It’s cool.”

  Only it’s not, and she knows it. I know it, Chad knows it … every last damn one of us knows that we are far, far from being cool.

  “We’re getting out of here,” I repeat.

  “I know, I know,” Cammy says.

  “No,” I say. “I mean now.”

  “YOU ARE OUT OF YOUR FREAKING MIND, BRIAN.”

  “You got a better idea? I’m listening.”

  “Yeah!” Travis says. He gets up from Golab’s couch and points at Chad. “We kick this son of a bitch off the bus.”

  “Whoa!” Kenzie says, scowling at him.

  “Yeah, I’d watch that mouth of yours, son,” Cammy says, tightening her grip on her hockey stick. “That’s one of my boys you’re talking about.”

  This isn’t going the way I hoped.

  I spent the last ten minutes describing my idea, same as I described to Jaime on the roof. Kat’s in the hallway now, spelling everything out to everyone else, explaining our options. Her job is to come back and report to us what the others want to do. I told our group everything about Laura, about her meds, and that—I thought I was pretty clear on this point—it’s the best way to save Chad’s life. With any luck. Even if it isn’t a cure, it might buy us enough time for someone to find one.

  I guess that isn’t going to be enough for some people.

  Travis folds his arms. “It’s already been at least an hour,” he says. “That leaves an hour if we’re lucky before he starts turning into one of those things. Look, it’s nothing personal, but Ten Ball here is a pretty big guy, and we can’t risk him going blitzkrieg on us.”

  “He won’t if we get to Laura,” I say.

  “You don’t know where she is!” Travis yells. “You want to just wander the halls calling her name? No, that won’t work, so … huh. Okay, so we go door to door real quiet like? We don’t have that kind of time.”

  “She’s got to be in one of the west C buildings,” I say, restraining my anger. “That’s where Kenzie saw her last. She might have a hiding place over there, probably in a classroom.”

  “Chad?” Jaime says quietly. “How about you? How you feeling so far?”

  “I don’t feel no different,” Chad says. “’Cept my back hurts.” He holds up his good hand and tentatively curls it into a fist. “That hurts some too.”

  “Well … do you feel like killing someone?” Jaime goes.

  “Just you, nutsack.”

  Cammy snorts. “Sounds healthy to me.”

  Jaime takes a hard look at Chad. “You’re a dick,” he states. “A white-trash bitch.”

  Chad, seated on Golab’s desk, squints at him. “Are you, like, one of those high-functioning retards?” he asks. “Because I’ll kick your Mexican ass square into next week, ese.”

  Jaime leaps to his feet, tense. Chad squares up to him.

  “You wanna go?” Jaime says, his lips pulling back from his teeth.

  Chad throws a hand into Jaime’s chest, sending Jaime back a few feet. “Fuckin’ let’s do this, then!”

  “Hey!” Kenzie shouts.

  “Those are my people I have to take care of!” Jaime shouts, pointed toward the hall. “And I’m not letting you wipe ’em out!”

  “‘Your people’? What’re we, on the rez now?”

  “Guys—” Cammy says.

  “I’m not letting anyone else get hurt,” Jaime says. “And if that means I got to throw your ass out of this building, then I’ll damn well do it.”

  “Ah, boo-hoo, ya fuckin’ pussy.”

  “Shut up!” I shout.

  This pauses them for just a second, long enough for me to move between them.

  “We cannot do this now,” I say, swiveling my head to glare at them. “Too much shit’s gone wrong already. We need our heads in the game. Got it? We’ve got a plan, and we have got to work together on it.”

  “Last plan got Damon a little bit dead,” Travis says.

  “And it saved my sister.”

  Travis hesitates, then shrug-nods an agreement.

  Jaime stares hard again at Chad, then he relaxes too.

  “All right,” Jaime says. “I was just checking.”

  “Say what?” Cammy asks.

  “Needed to see if our good buddy here still had some self-control,” Jaime says. “And it looks like he does, for the moment. Sorry, Chad. I didn’t think just asking you was going to answer the question.”

  Chad looks like he doesn’t know what to do with that. He sniffs and shrugs. “S’cool,” he mutters.

  Man, was that a big goddam gamble. Still—he’s proved the point.

  “We probably have more than two hours from the time he got bit,” I say. “He’s in good shape—healthy, remember? But the clock’s ticking. I know that. I’ve made my suggestion. And I’m going, whether anyone comes with me or not. But I really don’t want to go by myself.”


  “I’m not going.”

  I turn to Cammy. She’s not smiling, not frowning. But her jaw is set, her grip tight on the hockey stick.

  “Cammy … what?”

  “I said I’m not going,” she says. “Someone needs to stay here with these freaks.”

  “Listen,” I tell her. “You haven’t been onto the roof yet, but the 51 is gridlocked. People are trying like hell to get out of town by the looks of it. And we don’t know for sure if anyone’s coming for us here or not.”

  “He’s right, Cammy,” Kenzie says. “You have to come with us.”

  “We don’t know how long you might be here,” I say. “There’s only so much food.”

  “Brian,” she goes, “why are you talking to me like I’m a fool?”

  “Because I already lost Hollis and Jack today, and I don’t know if Laura’s still alive. I’m saving as many friends as I possibly can.”

  “Brian,” she says again, “look at those punks in the hallway. If by some chance one of those things gets in here, you think these drama queers will be able to fight it off?”

  “Don’t call ’em that,” Chad says. He’s sitting down again, staring at the carpet.

  Cammy cocks a hip. “What? ‘Things’? That’s what they are.”

  “‘Drama queers,’” Chad says. “Don’t call ’em that no more. ’Kay?”

  Cammy arches an eyebrow and folds her arms. “Chad?” she asks. “Chad Boris? That you in there?”

  Chad lifts his head. He has aged twenty years.

  “It’s been … a weird day,” he says, glancing at Jaime and Travis. “And that shit don’t help.”

  Cammy studies him for a moment. So does Travis.

  Then Cammy nods. “All right,” she says. “I take it back.” She looks at me. “The point still stands. They’re going to need some muscle, just in case. And if you beefy young gents aren’t going to do it, then I will.”

  Jaime steps toward her. “Listen, sister, we’re the only ones who—”

  “Sister?” Cammy says. “Thought we weren’t calling people names anymore.”

  “Okay, see, this is why we’re going,” I say, standing between them. “Because ten more minutes in here together will kill us all long before the monsters do. Jaime was right about that.”

  Cammy takes a deep breath. “I’m sorry,” she says. “You all are going to look for help, right? If you make it off campus?”

  “Of course.”

  “Fine, then. Do that. I’m staying here to play defense.”

  I think about the kids in the hallway. “Can you get them to listen to you if they need to?”

  Strangely, Cammy smiles. It’s weak, it’s tired, but it’s there. “I’ve been bossing around prissy white cheerleaders since August,” she says. “This bunch has nothing on them. Trust me.”

  “We’re not talking about making a human pyramid,” Jaime says. “If you say run, they need to know where and how fast.”

  “Hey, relax. In a little while it won’t be your problem, now, will it?”

  Jaime tenses, and at that moment, I realize what it is he’s worried about. This is his home away from home. In some ways, these are his kids. That’s what he meant by saying “my people.” Like he told me on the roof, he does want to get out of here; but he’s afraid of what might happen to them without him.

  “Jaime,” I say quietly. “It’s cool, man. Cammy can handle it. I swear. But if you decide to stay, we need to know that now, not out there.” I think for a second, then add, “Out there it’s not a dress rehearsal. Know what I mean?”

  Jaime doesn’t move, doesn’t blink. Cammy stares him down. When Jaime takes another step toward her, she doesn’t flinch.

  “Take care of them,” he says. “Don’t let anything happen to them. Okay?”

  Cammy flourishes her hockey stick and stamps the end down hard on the ground. For one moment, it looks like a medieval poleax.

  “I’m on the job,” she says. She resumes Golab’s chair.

  I scan the others. Mackenzie and Chad, Travis and Jaime. Kat opens the office door and slides inside, and I can’t help but notice how quiet it is in the hallway behind her.

  “They’re staying,” she says.

  “All of them? You’re sure?”

  “Positive. They’re too scared. They think someone’ll be here soon.”

  “What about you?”

  Kat glances at Jaime. “If Jaime’s going with you, I want to stay here.”

  Jaime turns to her, surprised. “Katrina—”

  “I don’t want to see what happens,” Kat says. “I’ve seen enough.”

  “I’m not leaving you here.”

  “Not your call, boss. I’m staying. Plus you guys need me and Dave to move the ladder. You make it that far, trust me, I’ll be over that fence in a heartbeat.”

  “John could—”

  “You really want to trust him on something like this?”

  Jaime hesitates. “Okay. You and Cammy call the show.”

  Kat tries to smile for him but isn’t quite successful. She leans up and kisses Jaime once, briefly, on the lips, then turns and goes back out into the hall.

  “We ready to do this?” Chad says. He holds up his right hand for us to see. “I don’t wanna piss on anyone’s snow cone, but we better hurry up.”

  Around his knuckles, I can see swollen, crusty yellow sores. They glimmer under the fluorescent light overhead.

  “Jesus,” Jaime whispers.

  I reach slowly for Chad’s shirt. He doesn’t stop me from pulling the collar down a couple of inches. Beneath the thin material, Chad’s skin glitters. It’s not bumpy, but more like scales.

  I feel cold all over as dread climbs up my spine.

  Jaime folds his arms and clears his throat. “Okay,” he says. “So we hit the roof again like before, climb down to the C buildings. Find your girl. Book fast and hard for the fence. That about it?”

  “Well, here’s what I’m thinkin’,” Chad says. His posture has gotten worse, his back starting to curl. It’s not as bad as Hollis’s was, but it’s getting there. I wonder how long we’ve really got before he goes feral.

  I wonder who else is wondering it. And what they’re prepared to do about it.

  I give myself a shake to clear my head. One thing at a time.

  “They don’t feel no pain,” Chad goes on. “I gave my buddy Hollis a straight shot to the cash and prizes, and he didn’t so much as blink. That leaves two choices. Cripple … or kill. As one of the soon-to-be freak shows out there, I’m votin’ for the cripple. There might be a cure somewhere out there, and we gotta give those bastards a chance at it, including yours truly, if you don’t mind.”

  We nod.

  “Everyone got their gear?” he asks.

  We all pat our various weapons. Kenzie’s the only one without. Jaime offers to find something in the shop for her, but she only shakes her head.

  “We give the key to the fridge to Kat?” I say. “I mean, in case we …”

  “Right,” Jaime says. “In case.”

  “Try the phone again,” Cammy says. “Just to make sure.”

  Kenzie obediently takes her phone out. She checks the screen, then flips it open and punches in 911. Listens.

  “Nothing,” she says, closing the cell. “Sorry.”

  “Had to try,” Cammy says, sighing. She stands and hefts her hockey stick.

  Kenzie slides the phone into her pocket. “We’re really going to leave everyone here?”

  “They can’t all fight, and we don’t have enough weapons to go around anyway,” I say. “If any of them change their minds about staying and want to try going over the fence on our way back from C, they know they’ve got the option.”

  “All right,” Jaime says. “Let’s move.”

  “One question,” Chad says, standing in his way. He looks at Travis. “What’s a ten ball?”

  Travis blinks. “It’s a pool ball. Like in billiards. It’s white with a blue stripe.”


  He suddenly rubs a hand across Chad’s Mohawk. And grins.

  Chad tightens his jaw, and I think, Oh, shit, we were so close too …

  Then Chad says: “Okay, fair enough.”

  I almost laugh. With that break in the tension, we go into the hallway together. May as well have entered a tomb; the silence is deep, penetrating, and unsettling, punctuated infrequently by a thump on the outside doors that echoes hollowly down the length of the hall. People are weeping softly, trying to hide it, but not trying too hard.

  Serena is stalwart as ever. She still, even after all this time, is keeping an arm around that little freshman girl. Kat sits near Serena. Dave sits nearby, thumbing listlessly through one of Golab’s acting textbooks. The girls he was holding earlier are curled up on each other a few feet away. I don’t see John anywhere. And I don’t care.

  Dave gets up when he sees us coming out of the office. “I really want to come with you,” he says, frowning. “But … I get it. You can count on me.” He glances at Travis. “You all right, man?”

  Travis conjures a smile. “Sure thing,” he whispers.

  “What happens if you don’t come back?” Kat asks, looking right at Jaime.

  “Someone will,” Jaime promises.

  I don’t believe him. I don’t think Kat does, either, but she doesn’t argue.

  Our team crosses to the auditorium doors as the freshman girl leans further into Serena, curling up, eyes closed tight, whimpering. Serena strokes her hair and says, “Shh, shh,” over and over. Serena kisses the girl tenderly on the cheek.

  One hand on the auditorium door, Chad turns to me and says, “Dude. That was hot, I’m not gonna lie.”

  I smirk back at him. Chad laughs tensely, then shoulders the door open. Kenzie and Jaime follow. I wait for Travis.

  He and Dave are hugging each other tight. Travis’s face is toward me, over Dave’s shoulder, and he looks like he’s fighting tears. Thing is, I can’t tell if it’s because he’s scared, sad, happy, or what. Maybe all of it.

  Dave lets him go with a curt nod. Travis gives Dave’s shoulder a quick shake, then walks toward the auditorium. He stops at the threshold.

  “I kind of wish my dad was here to see me,” Travis says. “Going on a rescue mission. Being all manly.”

  “Thanks for doing this,” I say.

  Travis shrugs. “Don’t thank me too quickly,” he says. “I’m doing it for him.”