Return to Love

by Lynn Hubbard

  “Hey I’m having a sleep over Friday night you have to come!” Jane said excitedly.

  “Let me ask my mom, but I’m sure it’ll be fine.” Joanie said excitedly.

  “I thought we could meet after school Friday and walk over together I live close to school. Too Close.” Jane added.

  “Sure I’ll see you tomorrow!” Joanie said a sleep over sounded fun.

  Joanie woke up and stretched. Her eyes opened wide as she realized it was finally Wednesday! Panicking she ran to her closet to pick out something lovely to wear. Cursing herself for not bringing more clothes with her when she moved back to her mom’s. She finally decided on a green sweater which matched her eyes and a black skirt. Satisfied she went and hopped in the shower. When she climbed out, the wonderful scent of bacon was in the air. Her stomach rumbling, she went into her room, to change quickly before breakfast.

  Walking into the kitchen, she found her mom at the stove, sliding two eggs onto a plate and adding some bacon to go with it.

  “Good morning Sunshine!” Her mom said smiling as she slid the plate in front of Joanie.

  “Thank you Mom! But you know you didn’t have to go to all of this trouble. I know you just got in from work.” Joanie mumbled with her mouth full of the savory meal.

  “I know honey, I just feel bad because I haven’t been able to spend much time with you lately.” Her mom said patting her arm.

  “Well, you could let me drop out of school.” Joanie said hopefully.

  Her mom frowned. “What’s going on at school?”

  “Nothing mom, just kidding.” Joanie said forcing a smile. “I’m looking forward to school today. Eric, you know Brad’s friend, is going to show me how to drive. I mean if it’s okay with you.” Joanie added quickly realizing she had forgotten to ask for permission first.

  Carol looked at her daughter’s hopeful expression and smiled back at her. “I think that would be fine. I’m sure that Brad will be relieved to hear it.”

  Joanie laughed, “Um, yeah I guess you could say that.” Joanie helped her mom clean up the kitchen, and she headed out the door to school as her mom headed to bed.

  She stepped out of her apartment building with an extra spring in her step. Meeting up with Kate, Joanie could not stop smiling; she was so excited to see Eric again.

  “I am so happy for your! It’s just like a date! I would LOVE to drive that car!” Kate said squealing.

  Joanie laughed, “It’s NOT a date. He probably just feels sorry for me ’cause I’m a retard and can’t drive a stick.”

  “I’m sure that’s EXACTLY what he was thinking.” Kate said giggling.

  “Do you wanna come along?” Joanie asked Kate not wanting her to feel left out.

  Kate barked a short laugh. “You want me to come with you on your date? I don’t think so three’s a crowd. Besides I don’t have a death wish. I know what happened on your last attempt to drive.”

  Joanie shoved her friend. “Thanks for the support!” She said as they ran into the school yard as the first bell rang.

  Luckily her early classes passed quickly and before she knew it lunch was here. She grabbed her bag lunch from her locker and scampered out onto the grounds to find Kate. She wasn’t used to being forced outside to eat in the cold, but at least the sun was out, so it made it a little better.

  She didn’t have to look too hard she was in their usual spot with Jane and Sally. She sat down with a cherry “Hi!”

  Jane squealed, “Why didn’t you tell us you have a date!?”

  Joanie tried to hide her blush as she fussed with her sandwich. Apparently Kate had already old them about her driving lesson with Eric. “It’s not a “Date” he’s just a friend of my brothers.”

  “I don’t see why you would be interested in someone like that when Chris Harper keeps checking you out.” Sally said motioning with her head to the football table on the other side of the clearing. Joanie refused to look over, least he see her looking and think she WAS interested in him.

  “Eric is way cooler than Chris.” Kate said sticking up for Joanie. Joanie smiled at her gratefully and finished her lunch. Frowning when the next bell rang everybody herded into the building to their next class.

  Joanie was brain dead. She was so excited about seeing Eric again and finally learning how to drive she could not concentrate on her school work. The drone of the teacher’s voice did not help the situation and almost put her into a trance. She heard the class laughing and looked up to find her math teacher glaring at her.

  “Miss Caldwell, are you with us today?” She asked.

  “Um yes ma’am.” Joanie said forcing a smile and fumbling through her geometry book. Feeling her face getting red, she hid it behind the open book and slunk down in her chair. The final bell could not come soon enough.

  Somehow she made it through the day to her final class, music. They were studying

  Johannes Brahms. Apparently he had created other works besides lullabies. All of them were very calming and helped sooth her nerves. She relaxed and let the subtle melodies take her to another realm. She was thankful they had finished the section on brass instruments. Anything with a spit valve should be avoided.

  Chapter 8

  “BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRINNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGG!”

  The angry clamor of the bell jolted her back to reality. It was time. She quickly gathered her books and jostled her way to her locker. Swapping out her books, she slammed the door shut and was caught up in the stream of classmates exiting the building in their haste for freedom.

  She quickly looked around the large campus seeing cars everywhere. But not Eric’s. She should have set up a meeting point. There were several entrances to the school. Or maybe, the little voice inside her head said, he’s not coming, he forgot. Frowning, she looked around at the cars which were starting to dwindle still not seeing Eric’s. Sighing she started walking towards the side walk which would take her home.

  A car rumbled up beside her. It was him! She quickly covered up her excitement as she leaned down to look into the passenger window. Eric leaned over and rolled down the window, so he could talk to her.

  “Sorry I’m late; I got tied up at work.” He apologized.

  “It’s ok. Thanks for helping me.” Joanie said grabbing the door handle, so she could hop into the warm car.

  “Anytime.” Eric replied checking his mirrors before pulling out into traffic.

  An awkward silence filled the car as Joanie stared ahead nervously. It still seemed like a dream to her – she was finally going to get to practice driving and by the hottest guy in town. At least SHE thought he was the hottest. She sneaked a glance over at him.

  Eric was concentrating on the traffic that was still heavy since the parade of cars was still leaving from the school. Eric glanced over at her, and her face flushed red. She just realized that she was staring at him. He smiled in that quirky way of his as she turned to stare out the window. The window was steamed up due to the contrast of the warm air inside and the cold air outside. Joanie used the sleeve of her coat to wipe away the condensation.

  The silence continued, and Joanie started to panic, she had to say something! He was going to think she was just a dumb lump sitting in his car!

  “Um.” She started softly, but her voice sound odd in the quiet car. She cleared her throat. “Are we going to practice at the factory parking lot?” She inquired not daring to look at him as she asked.

  He chuckled slightly. “You can’t learn to drive in a parking lot. You need to practice on the road.”

  “What!” Joanie asked shocked. She’d be killed! She thought as she watched the cars zooming by and cutting in and out of traffic.

  As if reading her mind, Eric laid his hand on her arm reassuringly. “Don’t worry, were going to a little town I know, it’ll be safe there.”

  Joanie still panicky nodded and forced a smile. I am going to kill Kate. She thought, Kate was always there offering her support and Joanie needed her desperately right now. Not on
ly was she alone with Eric but they were going who knows where.

  Silence again filled the car as Joanie watched building after building fly past them. They had only been traveling for about thirty minutes, but it felt much longer. Eric finally pulled up in front of a small restaurant in an unfamiliar town.

  “Where are we?” Joanie asked Eric.

  He smiled “Hopeful Heights, Kentucky.”

  She glared, “I’ve never heard of Hopeful Heights.”

  “Most people haven’t we did some construction near here last summer. Hardly any traffic. I figured this would be a great place to teach someone how to drive.”

  Joanie looked around and forced a smile. “Yeah great.” She murmured.

  “Hungry?”

  “Huh?” Joanie said.

  Eric nodded to the Diner in front of them. “I’m kinda hungry, I figured we might as well eat first, can’t drive on an empty stomach.”

  Joanie turned red; she didn’t have any money to eat with. “Ahh, no I’m not hungry. I’ll just wait for you.” She insisted brightly.

  Eric twisted towards her as he turned the car off. She was fumbling with her coat strings nervously. “I can’t leave you in the car you would freeze to death, then Brad would kill me.” He teased.

  “I wasn’t prepared to eat out.” Joanie confessed, sort of.

  Eric laughed, “Did you think I would ask you out to eat and expect you to pay for yourself?”

  Joanie bristled, “I don’t need someone to take care of me, I can take care of myself. You’re already helping me out as it is. ‘Sides, I’m not hungry.” She said stubbornly as her stomach rumbled betraying her.

  Eric sighed climbing out of the car. As his door slammed shut Joanie sank down in her seat and leaned against the door. She cried out in shock as her door flew open and Eric pulled her to her feet. “Fine you can watch me eat.” He said guiding her into the Diner and into a booth. She was dismayed when he sat next to her instead of across from her. She had no way to escape.

  She propped her feet up on the seat across from her and slouched down. Eric sighed, “Ok, I’m sorry for being hungry. We were on a deadline at work, and I didn’t have time to grab lunch today.” He pouted at her, and Joanie had to laugh as she sat up.

  “No Eric, I’m sorry I’m acting like a brat. I’m just really nervous.” She said the last part in a whisper.

  “Hello!” A cheery voice interrupted. “Can I take your order?” The motherly waitress asked as her eyes twinkled at Joanie.

  Not thrilled with the interruption, Eric reluctantly looked at the menu and ordered a double cheeseburger with fries and a root beer.

  Joanie sat up as Eric offered her the menu. “I’ll take an order of fries.” She said handing the menu to the waitress. The waitress looked at Eric expectantly. “and a cheeseburger and root beer.” he added. The waitress nodded in approval as she took the menu and walked away.

  “Why are you nervous?” Eric asked.

  “Oh, I don’t know, maybe because I don’t know how to drive and don’t want to make a fool of myself in front of you, or perhaps I’m in the middle of nowhere in a town that isn’t even on the map, or maybe because I’m alone with a boy eating which is kinda like a date but isn’t really a date because I was never asked about it.” Joanie rambled.

  Eric smiled down at her. “I’m not a boy.”

  Joanie raised an eyebrow. “You’re a girl?”

  Eric grinned, sitting up straight to show his full height. “I’m a man.”

  “You sure are!” The waitress agreed sitting down their drinks and winking as she walked away.

  “Wonderful!” Joanie said sarcastically rolling her eyes. “So am I your charity project for the week?” She asked.

  “Yup.” Eric said, taking a big sip of his root beer, so she wouldn’t see him smiling.

  “Why?”

  “Why what?” He asked raising an eyebrow.

  “Why are you being so nice to me and helping me out all the time? Are you my guardian angel?” she asked only halfway kidding.

  Eric laughed out loud. The rich, warm sound causing tingles to run down her spine. She noticed some of the other Diner patrons looking over appreciatively. “I’m no angel. I don’t know, when I ran into you at the carnival it was like something inside of me changed. I felt something. I’ve hung around with a lot of girls, but it never meant anything to me. I was always more concerned about myself than their needs. But when I ran into you, I wanted you to be happy; I wanted to MAKE you happy. Does that make sense?” Eric asked as the waitress sat down their baskets of food in front of them. She then scurried away, so she wouldn’t interrupt.

  Joanie looked thoughtful. Butterflies were squirming around in her stomach, but she finally was able to collect her thoughts quickly enough so he wouldn’t think she was slow witted. “When we ran into you guys in the dark alley behind the carnival booths I was scared. When I found out we actually knew you I was still nervous. In fact, I’m ALWAYS nervous around you, which is strange ‘cause I’m not a shy person. I’m more of an, in your face, person. I guess I just wanted you to like me and was afraid you wouldn’t, or that you only liked me and were helping me because you felt sorry for me or felt obligated to help me.”

  Joanie shrugged and began eating hungrily, so she wouldn’t have to talk anymore. Eric sat looking thoughtful, as he took a huge bite of his overflowing double cheeseburger. She would NEVER understand men.

  The burger was very good Joanie thought taking a small bite at first and then a larger one. She was glad that Eric was sitting next to her, so he couldn’t watch her eat. That would have been really unnerving. She watched as he picked up a French fry and held it to her mouth.

  “Fry?” He asked his eyes twinkling hoping she would take the bait.

  Not enjoying being treated like a dog she took the fry out of his hand and popped it into her mouth. She was sure that April Miller would have taken the fry with her mouth, but Joanie did not need to be hand fed and she wasn’t in the mood to pretend otherwise.

  Eric’s smile widened as he watched her pick up some more fries and popped them into her mouth chewing hungrily. They finished their meal, and Joanie looked up to find Eric staring at her. He was turned sideways in the booth giving her his full attention. “You aren’t like other girls.”

  Joanie bristled at that and her eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”

  “I dunno, you’re not all giggly and needy like most girls are.”

  “And that’s a good thing?” Joanie asked not quite sure about it herself.

  Eric chuckled, and his whole body shook slightly. “Yes, it’s a very good thing.” He gave her a lopsided grin and Joanie smiled back. The waitress came by and handed the bill to Eric. Eric gave the waitress cash for the bill and her tip. He then scooted out of the booth and offered Joanie his hand to help her up. Hesitating just for a second, she grabbed his large, warm hand and allowed him to slide her over the red vinyl seats to the edge, so she could stand up.

  Before she knew it, Joanie found herself back in Eric’s car sitting in the driver’s seat. Eric was sitting next to her. Very close, like in the restaurant.

  “I’m not gonna jump out.” Joanie said commenting on his closeness.

  “In case I need to grab the wheel.” He said explaining. He then proceeded to show her all the gadgets and knobs she would need to use to drive. She was grateful that he had only two foot pedals to worry about. This was going to be much easier.

  Eric leaned close to show her another switch, and she deeply inhaled his scent. It was addictive. She just wanted to climb into his arms and burry her face in his neck. Maybe this would not be as easy as she first thought. It was going to require A LOT of concentration. As instructed, she placed her foot on the brake pedal and turned the key in the ignition. The engine rumbled to life on the first try.

  “Ok, we first have to back out.” Eric said motioning to the brick wall of the restaurant parked in front of them. Joanie looked at him in a panic.
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  “Can’t you back out and then I can just do the forward part?” She asked hopefully.

  “Nope, unfortunately, I won’t be with you all the time, so you have to learn how to do it yourself.” Eric had her adjust her mirrors, so she could see the road behind her. She turned her head and looked behind her glad to see there was no traffic on the road.

  She grasped the gear shift on the steering wheel like Eric showed her and put it into R for reverse. She looked in her mirrors again and then lightened the pressure on the brake pedal as instructed. The car slowly began to move backward. Eric told her to take her foot off the brake and gently hit the gas and turn the wheel all at the same time.

  Nervously Joanie did as she was told barely applying any pressure on the gas pedal. She was sure that snails would have been passing her, if it was the season for snails. But the car was moving backward, and he helped her turn the wheel, so the car was moving to face the correct way. Joanie thanked God, that she wasn’t parked next to any cars, and there were no pedestrians in sight.

  “Put your foot on the brake.” Eric told her softly as she complied. “Okay now open your eyes.”

  Joanie’s eyes popped open and she looked at Eric startled, she had not realized that she had closed them. She chastised herself for being stupid and was glad that Eric made no further comments. They were horizontal with the brick wall now, and they were still in the Diner’s parking lot.

  “I’m so sorry!” Joanie whispered, “I was praying.”

  Eric nodded, and she could have sworn she heard him say, so was he, to himself.

  “Okay, keep your eyes open and move the gear shift into D for drive. Check for cars and pull out onto the road and turn right.”

  Joanie took a deep breath, and before she knew it she was on the main road driving! She was going about ten miles per hour, but she was driving! Eric made her speed up a little and instructed her on the stop signs and traffic signals (even though she already knew about those!). She turned off into a park, and the tree lined street was breathtaking. She wished she could look around more, but she had to watch the road.