Charlotte - Pride and Prejudice Continues
Page 16
Lunch was served and Mr Collins was delighted to have the opportunity of having apple pie, made with his own apples, served to his guests. Even Charlotte was impressed and declared it was the best she had tasted since living there.
They attended Evensong and as predicted, they found a boy willing to inform Mrs Thomas of Louisa's whereabouts for a ha'penny. It was dark as they exited the church and was turning chilly, the sky full of stars portending a lovely day on the morrow. They all walked the short way back to the parsonage where Mrs Higgs greeted them at the door and informed them that she had prepared hot chocolate for them in the sitting room.
For the first time since she married Mr Collins, Charlotte felt at home and at ease. She had felt it for a little while when the Abbots had been to dinner, but this time the feeling was stronger and enveloped her, the parsonage felt like home, their company felt familial and even Mr Collins seemed better than ever.
She renewed her determination to back away from the foolish flirtation that she and Colonel Fitzwilliam had been engaged in. She sincerely hoped that he had not taken it too seriously, and looked forward to tomorrow and planned in her head a route to walk that did not take them to the clearing, whilst she sipped her hot chocolate.
She sat down on the sofa next to Louisa and continued to drink her hot chocolate whilst Mr Collins talked about gardening and his vegetable plot and Mr Simmons offered his professional advice. She did not hear more than one in four words; she was deep in thought fighting within herself. On the one hand, her attraction to Colonel Fitzwilliam was obvious and she craved more of the feelings that threatened to send her out of her wits when he touched her. Nevertheless, on the other hand she knew she was a fool to risk everything she had here. The feeling of being at home pervaded every part of her body and mind. She relaxed against the cushion. I certainly would be very foolish indeed to risk losing all I have here, she thought.
* * *
As she had expected Mrs Higgs put on a bit of a display for dinner, she whispered to Charlotte her explanation, “To make up for lunchtime.”
They sat down to the roast lamb garnished with dried rosemary, again from Mr Collins' garden he was proud to admit. The conversation stayed light and friendly and Louisa and Mr Simmons said they would prefer to wait until they were married to repay the invitation to dine at Oak Wood Farm as man and wife.
“Mr Simmons, I would not expect anything else.” Charlotte reassured him.
“Thank you Mrs Collins. I have to admit, I did not expect to find such a warm welcome at the parsonage. I had thought that a certain person held sway over this house with a firm hand, I am glad to find I am wrong.”
Mr Collins blushed upon realising to what Mr Simmons was referring and to his relief Charlotte responded in a manner that left him curiously satisfied.
“Let us say, that perhaps that certain person did at one time hold sway in this household, but that the inhabitants have seen the light. We are adults Mr Simmons; we no longer need a nursemaid.” She cringed inwardly at her boldness and hoped that her husband would not take exception to her words.
She glanced in his direction and he merely smiled at her and patted her hand. She drank some of her wine to hide her surprise, but deep inside she was pleased. She had stated what to her, and certainly to others, was obvious; however, Mr Collins had been slow in realising that Lady Catherine was over-controlling and far too officious with their lives.
“Louisa tells me that you join her in sewing and crocheting for the poor.” Mr Simmons said glad to change the subject.
“Yes indeed. I was glad Mrs Brown invited me to join such an activity.”
“Indeed yes,” chimed in Mr Collins, “I feel I am most fortunate in my choice of wife Mr Simmons.”
Charlotte raised her eyebrows, was this the same Mr Collins who was usually fawning over Lady Catherine, dismissing the opportunity to speak about her Ladyship in favour of complimenting his wife?
“She is an amiable woman and a good friend to my Louisa.” agreed Mr Simmons wholeheartedly.
“I have often thought that not every woman is cut out to be the wife of a clergyman, but I as you see, have been blessed indeed I have.” He returned his attention to his plate and Louisa winked at Charlotte.
Dessert was served and then they all returned to the sitting room, tiredness setting in.
Charlotte promised to visit Louisa in the morning and Mr Collins invited them to tea the following Saturday. The couple did not stay for very long after returning to the sitting room as yawns were being stifled and the conversation growing thin. They said their thanks to Charlotte and Mr Collins and set off for Hunsford in Mr Simmons carriage.
Once the door was shut Mr Collins, turned to Charlotte and said something she was surprised to hear, “Thank you Charlotte my dear, for a wonderful day.”
It took her a moment to find her voice, “You are welcome William, and it was very pleasant, was it not?”
Mr Collins smiled at her, reached out, and touched her arm, nodding to the stairs. She took his proffered hand and followed him up the stairs to bed.
24
When Charlotte awoke the next morning, she thought she was ill. She tried to sit up and her head swam. Mr Collins did not notice as he was getting out of the other side of the bed. However, when she tried the second time to sit up her head not only swam, but the room did also and he somehow managed to give her the chamber pot and hold her shoulder to prevent her from falling off the bed at the same time. He kindly held her hair and stroked her back until the vomiting stopped.
Once her bout of nausea was over and her stomach had no more to divulge Mr Collins managed to persuade her to return to bed and rest some more.
He rang the bell and called for Mrs Higgs who repeated over and over again that the lamb had been thoroughly cooked and that her mistress must be sickening for something, “It's dreadfully draughty in that church sir. Perhaps she's caught a chill.”
Charlotte said she did not wish anyone to make a fuss of her but wanted a cup of tea, and to rest a while longer in bed. However, Mr Collins pressed the issue and eventually she agreed that if she was not better in an hour or two that she would permit him to call for the apothecary.
She dosed back off to sleep and when she awoke an hour later, she felt much better. She rang the bell and Mr Collins arrived at the same time as Jenny. She sent Jenny back to the kitchen for hot water and set about assuring Mr Collins that whatever had ailed her was now passed.
He was not so easily persuaded, “I would not be easy on my weekly visit to Rosings if I thought you were in any way unwell, my dear.”
“That is very good of you, but I assure you I feel perfectly well again. I am certain that I ate something that did not agree with me last night.”
Mr Collins did not look completely satisfied, “If you are not completely certain, my dear, I will of course stay at home.”
There he was again offering to forego visiting Lady Catherine.
Charlotte smiled at him, “I will take some fresh air, and walk to the end of the lane and back again. I will not go far, I assure you, and I will be back within half an hour. I am sure the fresh air will do me the world of good, William.”
“Very well, but when you return I wish you to rest. I will explain the situation to her Ladyship and return home as quickly as she allows me to.”
Charlotte smiled at that, he was certainly a changed man, and she was glad, “Very good. I will rest in the sitting room and await your return and then if the weather stays this beautiful perhaps we can take tea together in the garden.”
Mr Collins' eyes lit up at the suggestion and she was pleased to see he liked the idea. He kissed her on the head, bid her adieu, and left the room to prepare himself for his visit to Rosings.
* * *
Charlotte's stomach certainly did not feel as settled as she professed and she took only a cup of tea before setting out to walk down the lane. She was glad of the fresh air, it calmed her mind, and she breathed deeply a
s she went. Her mind was occupied with thoughts of Louisa's wedding when she spied a figure up ahead of her, leaning against a tree. It was Colonel Fitzwilliam. She paused and thought for a moment of turning around but decided the situation needed to be addressed and was glad she was unwell, as it would serve as an excuse to keep her distance that morning.
He smiled at her as she drew nearer, and tipped his hat in greeting.
“Good Morning Charlotte, I am glad we are finally able to meet today.” He smiled coquettishly, “how are you?”
She was happy for the opportunity and took the chance to explain that she was unwell, and would not walk for long that day. She could see plainly that he was disappointed; it had been a sennight since they had last had the opportunity to be alone together and it was obvious he had been looking forward to seeing her again that morning.
“I am sorry to hear that.” he sighed, “I do hope you will recover quickly.”
“Thank you Colonel. I believe it was due to something I ate and therefore should not be of long duration. You need not worry yourself on my account.”
He looked seriously at her as they began to walk along the lane, “Oh but I would worry about you. How could I not Charlotte?”
There, he had said her name again and she felt her heart flutter at the sound of it upon his lips, but this time it did not excite her as it had the Monday previous. This time the flutter in her heart fought with the churning in her stomach and made her feel queasy once again.
“Truly, you are not well. Do you wish to return to the house?” He asked, his voice displaying his concern.
“Perhaps you are right,” She said stopping to breathe deeper, “I so wished to take some fresh air.”
“You can take fresh air from the comfort of your garden. Please allow me to escort you home.”
“Very well.”
He took told of her hand and put it through his arm as though she needed his support to help her walk. She blushed at the close proximity of his body to hers but he did not see it as her face was already flushed from whatever was ailing her. He closed his hand over hers and kept his eyes on her face as they walked back towards the parsonage. She was glad of his help but felt ashamed that she had not achieved her goal of preventing him from touching her once again.
They reached the parsonage and the Colonel rang the bell as she opened the door and walked in. Mrs Higgs joined them immediately in the hall.
“Your mistress is unwell. Where is Mr Collins?” he addressed Mrs Higgs.
“He's at Rosings with your aunt.” Charlotte informed him as she took off her bonnet.
“Then I will see you safely settled on the sofa and I will fetch him at once.” he turned to Mrs Higgs again, “bring Mrs Collins something for her stomach, and make sure it is warm.”
“Yes sir.” She threw a look of concern at Charlotte and ran off to the kitchen as she was bid.
Colonel Fitzwilliam helped Charlotte to the sofa. She thought to tell him that she felt unwell, but was not an invalid and could walk perfectly well but knew that would show she was out of humour and his assistance was from concern for her well-being. He bid her recline and asked Mrs Higgs for a blanket when she returned with a cup of hot chocolate.
“Now drink up your chocolate, it's good for you ma'am.” Mrs Higgs commanded as she placed the blanket over her mistress. She turned to the Colonel, “is there anything I can get for you sir?”
“No thank you. I will just satisfy myself that Mrs Collins is comfortable and then I will go to Rosings and fetch Mr Collins.” he said keeping his eyes on Charlotte's face all the while.
Mrs Higgs left them to attend to her work saying she would be back to see if Charlotte needed anything else in a few minutes.
Colonel Fitzwilliam knelt in front of the sofa, “I do wish you well Charlotte. I will leave you now.” He picked up her hand and lingeringly kissed the back of it, all the while his eyes boring into hers. He was reluctant to leave and kept his eyes on her until he reached the sitting room door, took a deep breathe to compose himself and departed.
Charlotte breathed a deep sigh of relief at his departure. Whatever am I to do about him? she asked herself, knowing that it might be harder than she had anticipated extricating herself from a situation that could so easily get out of hand. When she had finished her cup of hot chocolate, she laid her head back on the cushion and within minutes, she was fast asleep.
* * *
Mr Collins had patiently sat through his patroness’s criticisms of his sermon of yesterday and was now listening to her suggestions for his sermon the following Sunday. He scribbled down what he could, and mentally remembered to add only the least offensive ones to his sermon, one not to aggravate his parishioners and two not to aggravate her Ladyship by showing he had paid attention to all she had said. His writing skill was much slower than her Ladyship's dictating skill and so he did not catch the half of what she said but it mattered not to him. He truly had in the last few weeks seen her for who she really was, and he was severely disappointed, in her and in himself.
Colonel Fitzwilliam arrived and Lady Catherine broke off her dictation to address him, “Ah nephew, where have you been?”
“I have been walking aunt.” he replied curtly, his eyes on Mr Collins, “I chanced to see Mrs Collins near the parsonage, Mr Collins.”
Mr Collins looked up at him but Lady Catherine interrupted, “Yes, yes, never mind about Mrs Collins. You were needed here Richard, I need you to tell Mr Collins how poorly he delivered his sermon yesterday.”
Colonel Fitzwilliam turned to address his aunt, “I am sorry aunt, but I must pass on a message to Mr Collins.” She was taken aback, and he turned back to Mr Collins, “Mrs Collins is far from well sir, and I would advise you to return to the parsonage as soon as you can.”
Mr Collins stood immediately and made to leave, “Yes, thank you.” he half bowed to her Ladyship, nodded to the Colonel and made for the door.
“Oh and Mr Collins,” the Colonel called out after him, “your sermon yesterday was very good.”
Mr Collins could not help but smile at the compliment that Colonel Fitzwilliam had paid him, and as it was in front of his aunt, it made it all the sweeter.
* * *
He almost ran all the way back to the parsonage and as he burst through the front door, he found Mrs Higgs sitting on the stairs awaiting him. She instantly gestured to be silent by putting her finger to her lips. She then nodded towards the sitting room. Mr Collins opened the door as quietly as he could and saw Charlotte fast asleep on the sofa.
“Would you like some tea, sir?” Mrs Higgs whispered.
“Yes please.” he nodded, took off his coat and hat, and crept into the sitting room. He moved an easy chair so that he could sit and face Charlotte and waited for his tea to arrive. He did not have to wait long and he sat drinking the tea and watching his wife sleep.
She looked so angelic and peaceful lying there. I am so sorry I have treated you poorly; you deserve better my dearest Charlotte, he thought, replaying all that had passed over the previous few months. Dear Lord, let her pass through this illness and recover soon, he prayed. It will all be different my sweet Charlotte, I promise.
How long Mr Collins remained thus keeping his vigil over the sleeping form of his wife, he did not know. His stomach however, had begun to growl indicating that it must have been around lunchtime. He had sat in quiet prayer and contemplation over the events of the previous few weeks and found himself wanting. He wished he could take back his actions, he wished he had not gone running to Lady Catherine to bemoan his wife. He almost groaned aloud when he thought of his own behaviour.
When had he become sycophantic and ridiculous? He did not know but realised he had been for some time now. He was sure Charlotte's illness was owing to his own behaviour at least in some part, and he was sorry she had been suffering for it. He had heard that the shock of a loved-one becoming ill can change a person, make them reflect internally and repent of earlier actions, and he no
w felt it to be true.
He knew he was not sensible, but he was not stupid. He knew now he was often ridiculous and must have pained Charlotte on more than one occasion. He remembered with remorse the pompous things he was wont to say on occasion and was mortified; it shall be my earnest endeavour to demean myself with grateful respect towards her Ladyship. He hung his head in shame and prayed for forgiveness as well as Charlotte's recovery. He resolved to endeavour to be a different man, for her sake and prayed in earnest for Divine assistance.
Charlotte began to stir and Mr Collins attention was drawn back to her, he prayed again for her recovery and at length she opened her eyes and stretched, smiling at him.
“William! How long have I been asleep?” she purred sleepily.
“I do not know, I can scarcely remember how long I have sat beside you. However, it has been some time. Are you feeling any better?”
“I feel better rested. However, I dare not move as yet, for fear of disturbing my stomach once again.”
He stood up and kissed her forehead, “Let me fetch Mrs Higgs and see if we cannot take tea in the garden as you suggested. The day continues fine and the fresh air will put some colour into your cheeks, I am sure.”
He left the room and Charlotte tentatively raised herself to sitting, fearing another bout of nausea. She wished for it to pass quickly. Mr Collins returned promptly and informed her that it would take Mrs Higgs and Jenny some time to set up the garden furniture for the first time that year, and asked her if she would like to freshen up beforehand.
“I would like to splash a little water on my face yes, and perhaps get a shawl and bonnet too.”
He helped her to rise and she was glad of his help and the fact that the giddiness and nausea had not returned. They went up to the room that was now returned to its original use as 'theirs', and Mr Collins watched her prepare herself, a worried look diffusing his face.
“My dear, you need not be so concerned for me. I believe I am better now and am glad it has passed.”