Make Me

by Amanda Heath

  Though she said we aren’t allowed to spend the nights together after we got better. I just agreed to shut her up. I couldn’t handle her inside voice, which was pretty loud.

  Gram, though, she’s awesome. She brought us chicken noodle soup and medicine the first day. Not the second, the first. Grandma didn’t do crap but complain about Channing being there.

  Speaking of Channing, he is a huge baby when he’s sick. He was always trying to get me out of bed to get him something. I told him I was as sick as him, so I wasn’t getting up for anything. This just made him mad, and we proceeded to argue whose turn it was to get up. So, yes, the majority of the time I got up.

  Today is day four and we are both well enough to go to school. I’m not looking forward to this. Apparently it’s going around that I’m sleeping with Channing, which isn’t even true. Why does everyone have to make me look like a slut? He’s my freaking boyfriend, so who cares. I think every woman has the right to sleep with her boyfriend/husband/partner without it being anyone else’s business.

  Channing pops out of the bathroom, his hair still damp. His body wash fills the room with his scent and I take a deep breath. His torso is bare and I find myself drooling because we haven’t really done anything in four days. I feel like a thirsty man in the desert, begging for some water.

  “Paisley, quit staring. You can have me all you want tonight,” he tells me, going to the closest to retrieve one of his shirts. Gram brought him some clothes, including a few school uniforms. Don’t ask me why, but she did seem really happy we are together. I think she just wants Channing to be happy. It’s hard to tell when he’s happy since he smiles like once a week, but maybe he is happy. I want him to be happy with me.

  “Sorry,” I stammer from the bed, where I’ve been sitting putting on my stockings.

  He chuckles and puts his arms through the shirt. He turns to face me and slowly buttons up the shirt. I think my tongue is hanging out of my mouth. “It’s okay baby. I’m feeling what you are; I’m just better at torture.”

  “No you’re just evil,” I mutter, getting up from the bed and putting on my shoes. “Are you ready?” I ask, turning around to face him.

  “Yeah.” He sighs, throwing on his jacket and following me out of the house.

  We both climb into my Camaro, after he begs to drive. I let him only because my mind is freaking out about school. How am I going to get through the day with everyone calling me a slut behind my back? Ugh, stupid Channing.

  “What’s wrong?” he questions looking from the road to me, and then back. His hands strain against the steering wheel.

  “Nothing,” I tell him.

  “Bullshit, Paisley. What’s wrong?”

  I groan and look at him. He has a very striking profile, one I could look at all day. “Everyone is going to call me a slut.”

  “No they aren’t. For one thing, I’ll beat the crap out of anyone who does. Second, Royal cleared all that shit up anyway. He told them we are together and to shut the fuck up.”

  I just roll my eyes. Like they will believe all that just because Royal said it. Most of the time Royal is too busy being a slut for anyone to take him seriously.

  Channing lets it go as we get to the school. I take a deep breath before getting out of the car. Before I can get all the way out, Channing is on my side. He picks up my bag and slings it over his shoulder. He grabs my hand and pulls me towards the front of the school.

  Rachel calls my name and I look over. The group is at her baby blue Lexus, staring at Channing and me. I just wave, a stupid little smile on my face. Channing is holding my hand. Something I have wanted since he first called me his.

  Students look at us, okay well they stare at us, as we walk down the hallway. He stops at his locker and lets my hand go. He hands me my bag so I can get my stuff together. By the time I’m done and shut the door, Channing is just leaning against his locker. When I look up he looks deep into my eyes and I start breathing hard. More like panting. Then he leans down and puts his forehead on mine.

  “You could have asked Paisley. I would have done the whole thing for you,” he tells me, grabbing up both my hands and placing them in his.

  “Done what?” I ask, feeling tingles spread throughout my body.

  “The whole boyfriend thing. Hold your hand, your bag. Walked you to class. I didn’t do it because I thought you didn’t want me to.”

  I squeeze his hands hard. Smiling I say, “I know, but I wanted you to do it on your own.”

  He just laughs and brings his lips to mine. There’s a collective gasp in the hallways. The kiss is slow and romantic, almost if he wants everyone to know who I want. That I’m his. This is him claiming me in front of everyone.

  There’s a throat clearing and we break apart to meet the eyes of Mrs. Harrison. “Channing, Paisley. Its nice to see you both back from being sick.” A funny smile crosses her face before she goes on. “Though I would refrain from sticking your tongues down each other throats. We wouldn’t want either of you to be sick again.”

  Channing blinks a few times before he has to choke back laughter. “Yes ma’am.”

  ***

  “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me!” Rachel practically screams at me when she sits down for lunch.

  I groan and look around for Channing or Royal. Figures they are nowhere in sight. “I’m sorry. We just wanted to be kept alone. You know how the people at this school are. They have to talk and make up rumors because their own lives suck.”

  “That is true. But still, we are friends! You could have told me!” She is still shouting and I try very hard not to squint in pain.

  “Okay, okay. Please stop screaming before my ear drums burst,” I tell her, picking around my food. My stomach still isn’t happy about anything that isn’t soup.

  “I can’t believe he’s been holding your hand and kissing you in public! That’s not like Channing at all,” she tells me through a mouth full of food. Now my stomach is churning for another reason.

  “Maybe everyone thinks they know Channing, but they don’t. He isn’t this guy everyone thinks he is. He can laugh and be playful. He can tell me things that make my toes curl and my heart beat faster. He can even use his fingers for things that make me forget my damn name.” Yeah, I probably shouldn’t have said all that, but I couldn’t help it. Everyone’s getting on my last nerve with all this Channing isn’t like that crap. He just never had anyone to be this way for.

  “Thanks, baby,” Channing says, plopping down in his seat. I feel my cheeks color and duck my head in embarrassment.

  “I could have gone without the finger thing,” Rachel mutters, scrunching her face up in disgust.

  “Then stop talking with your mouth full. Paisley just said that to get you back for that nastiness,” Royal tells her sitting down with us. Once he gets all the way down he looks around the cafeteria as if looking for someone. When he finds them, his entire body gets tense. A muscle jumps in his jaw but he quickly looks away.

  I turn in the direction he was looking to see a tiny blonde girl sitting at a table three rows away. Her eyes are wide and green but lighter than mine. She’s sitting at Pierce’s table. She catches me looking and glares at me. I’m shocked for a second but then I glare back. She doesn’t intimidate me and she hurt Royal. Now I kind of want to flip her off, but that would make me really immature.

  “Isn’t that Wesley Bridges?” I ask Royal. I don’t know her, know her, but I know of her. She’s one of the smartest girls here. I even heard she has a full ride to Harvard, but I don’t know about that. I don’t even know if they give full rides to Harvard.

  “Fuck, Paisley, quit watching me. It’s really starting to freak me out,” Royal mumbles to me, never looking up.

  Rachel turns around in her seat and scans the room. “The little blonde chick sitting at Pierce’s table?” Rachel asks as she turns back around to face me.

  I nod. Channing looks too, finds her and then looks back at Royal. They exchange a look before Ch
anning puts his hand on my thigh and continues to eat.

  “Yeah, that’s Wesley.” Rachel sticks some food in her mouth and talks around it. “Who names their daughter Wesley? That is a boy name. But whatever, not my kid.” Yeah, but I bet one day she’ll be her brother’s girlfriend. “You shouldn’t talk to her, that’s Pierce’s cousin. That boy has overprotective issues with the females in his family.” She leans over the table in true Rachel fashion and whispers. “He’s even worse than Royal.”

  “Shut up, Rachel,” Royal says, looking down at his food.

  It’s been nearly a week with the ignoring her and nothing has happened. I had thought for sure she would come to her senses. Then, I look up at her again. She’s staring at Royal with longing in her eyes. Even from here I can tell how powerful it is. I think I need to speak that girl.

  Chapter 26

  I WATCH CARLY’S Grand Am pull to a stop in front of my guesthouse. I can’t help but jump up and down, waving my arms around like a dork. It’s the first day of Thanksgiving vacation and I’ve been waiting for this moment for over a month.

  “Oh my god! You freaking live in a mansion!” Carly cries the second she busts out of the car.

  “I don’t live in there, dork. I live in there.” I tell her pointing to the guesthouse. Her eyes don’t change, so I know it’s all the same to her. Once a upon a time it was all the same to me, too.

  “The same damn thing! That house is still bigger and nicer than where we live,” she tells me, laughter in her voice. She comes running and we are in each other’s’ arms before I know it. It feels so good to see her. “Where’s this boyfriend of yours?”

  “He’s at his house. He wanted to let us get settled before he comes over.” I eye Derek getting out of the car and retrieving some bags. Channing was really pissed when I told him Derek was coming. It took me three whole weeks before I told him that I lost my virginity to Carly’s brother and that he was coming with her. He was not happy. That was last week and he still hasn’t said much to me.

  He also stopped coming to stay at night, which hurt a lot. I keep jumping into old fears because he still hasn’t told me anything. I remember him promising when I was sick, but I never bring it up. I hate that we are fighting like this, but what does he want me to do? So what I didn’t tell him I invited a friend who I happened to have slept with. I invited him before Channing and I even happened. I couldn’t back out just to please him.

  I’m starting to learn you will have to always fight for what you want with Channing. You can’t sit back and let him run over you. Because he will and he’ll wreck you. I’m talking about you’ll be on the ground, bawling your eyes out in so much pain. He just doesn’t seem to understand I want him to share; I don’t want to have to ask. Some girls will ask until their lungs collapse, but not me.

  Channing is not an easy man to love. And yes I said love. I think I was in love with him the first time I saw him. Something in me just fit with him. I honestly think it’s the loneliness I see in his smoky eyes. It matches mine. I thought we could fix that together, but I’m not going to be with a stranger.

  “Paisley Vaughn, as I live and breathe! You look so much hotter now that you have money,” Derek says when he appears in front of me. I blink my thoughts away and throw my arms around him. While Carly is my best friend, Derek is also a really close friend. I just refuse to talk to him on the phone because he would start having phone sex with me, even if I wasn’t into it.

  “Its good to see you Derek.” I laugh, holding him close.

  “You okay sunshine?” he says in my ear, squeezing me once before letting go.

  “Yeah, I’m great. I’m so happy you all are here!” I let out a little squeal and grab Carly’s hand on my way into the house.

  She stops my forward momentum and turns around to the car. “Mark! Come on, baby!”

  Marks dark head appears from the front seat where he was working on his laptop. “Coming, love,” He calls and I give a goofy grin.

  Carly sighs and looks over at me. “Still gives me tingles every time he calls me that.” We laugh before finally heading into the house.

  I show them around and help Carly get their things settled into their bedroom. I make Derek put his stuff in with theirs; because there is no way I’m going to let him put them in mine. Even if Channing and I are fighting, I’m not going to play with fire.

  We are sitting around the living room catching up when my phone rings. The ID says its Rachel and I groan before answering. “Hey.” She thinks I’m beyond stupid for putting Channing out but I don’t care. Standing up for something you truly believe in is not stupid. I don’t care what anyone says about it. Plus it’s Channing and my business, not anyone else’s.

  “Hey! You need to come to my house! We are partying till the break of dawn!” Rachel screams through the phone. I cringe and pull the damn thing away from my face.

  “I can’t, Rachel. I have friends from out of town here.” Carly looks really happy though. Ugh she is going to make me take her to the party. Derek even perks up. He was starting to look bored. Mark just sits with his laptop, typing away.

  “Bring them, bitch! Just get here! Before Jasmine steals your man!” Then she clicks the phone off.

  I’m out of my seat before I know it. I race to my room and quickly change into something sexier. I find a red dress in my closest that is strapless and bunches out around the hips. I squeeze into the damn thing and run into the bathroom to take down my hair and fluff it up a bit. Next a find my red flats and then I’m in the living room.

  Carly is already coming out of her bedroom wearing a simple yellow dress that stops at mid thigh with yellow heels. “Damn baby, really?” Mark asks, getting up from the couch. “Ugh, I’m going to kill someone over that dress,” he mutters, taking her hand, as I rush everyone out the door.

  The Camaro stops outside Royal and Rachel’s and I have to stop a scream from coming out of my lips. Channing’s Jag is here. Mark is not the only one who is going to kill someone.

  I’m so mad; I leave my friends behind on my way to the house. Knowing Carly though, she’ll find her way around. I don’t even knock on the door; I just push it open and head into the living room. I scan the room slowly. There are a ton of people here, from school and some from not.

  Channing is nowhere in sight and I want to run around and scream his name. I’m not going to do that though because then they will call me crazy. Rachel wanders by but doesn’t see me. Her head is turned the opposite direction watching Kellan flirt with some freshman. Gross.

  I head to Kellan. I grab him by the back of his neck and force him down to my face. “Tell me where Channing is.”

  “In the kitchen with Royal,” he chokes out, surprised by my strength.

  “Thank you,” I say but I don’t let him go. “If you don’t drop the freshman and make a move on Rachel, I will cut your balls off in your sleep, capice?”

  “Y-Yes,” he stammers and then I let him go. Let’s see if he thinks I’m playing. If he doesn’t do something about Rachel, I’m going to hook her up with someone else. I get tried of her asking me about Channing and our sex life.

  I head into the kitchen until I find my douche canoe boyfriend. Jasmine is on his back, but you can tell his uncomfortable about it. Him and Royal are playing poker, the money being shots of bourbon.

  “Channing Traylen Southerland,” I bite out his name, loud. Everyone hears the anger in my voice and stops what they are doing. I have about twenty pairs of eyes on me right now.

  Channing’s back is tense and gets tenser after I call his name. He slowly swings his head around to look at me. The smoky blues are glazed a bit but he’s not shit faced or anything. I think he’s about to show me up but when he sees the dress his eyes bug out. “Did you wear that for your other boyfriend?”

  I roll my eyes. “No, you douche canoe, I wore it for you. And if you don’t stop your bullshit, I’ll be wearing it for some other guy who didn’t break my heart.”

 
His eyes narrow in anger and slowly he gets out of his chair. He’s wearing a black shirt and dark jeans. Both form fitting, but him being Channing, he wouldn’t wear anything else. “Excuse me?” he asks quietly. He thinks he’s going to intimidate me like he does everyone else.

  Well, I have news for you, Southerland. “You heard me. Keep pretending you didn’t and I won’t even give you enough time to see my ass walking out in this dress.”

  He blinks a few times and then he smiles. “I don’t have to do anything.”

  Oh really? “Look here, Channing. I’ve had enough of this shit. Either grow a pair and get over it, or I’ll get under someone else to get over you.”

  I turn on my heel done with him. Tears start streaming down my face before I even make it to the front door. Channing Southerland has brought me nothing but pain since the moment I met him.

  I make it to my car before I see him in the doorway. He’s too far away to stop me. So I peel out and I’m down the driveway before he even makes it to his car. I speed home but I know he’ll be right on my butt. Though he doesn’t know I like speed. He doesn’t know I get the biggest pleasure from fixing cars and going one hundred around a deadly curve.

  I beat him to my house, and I’m in my house locking it before he even pulls into the driveway. I take a deep breath, tears still falling down my eyes. That damn Miley Cyrus song is playing over and over again in my head. You know the one, where she swings on that wrecking ball naked. Ugh.

  Then he starts banging on my door. “Paisley open this fucking door. Right. Fucking. Now!” He’s yelling and screaming but I don’t let him in. I want to, because as sad as it seems, the only person in this world I want to love me like I love him is Channing. I’m ruined for all other men and it’s not fair that I can’t get what I want from him.