The Closer You Get (Fidelity #1)

by Carter Ashby

  Well, now she was just completely self-conscious. Had the wind blown her skirt up while they were walking? Were her nipples showing? “You can’t explain it?” she asked, smoothing the dress down her abdomen.

  He cocked his head, his eyes darkening. “I can try. You might not like it.”

  “Consider me warned. Go for it.”

  His jaw ticked. “It’s a good color for you. The fabric is thin. So thin I can’t stop thinking how little there is of it between my hands and your bare skin. The skirt flows around your knees, and I can’t help imaging sliding my hand up your thigh, taking that skirt with me, and finding out what color panties you’re wearing.”

  Cora became shockingly aware of how dowdy her panties were. Adam had taken her clothes and shoe shopping, but they’d for some reason bypassed the underwear. Why was she thinking about her underwear again?

  “You mad at me, now?” he asked.

  She looked up, her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth.

  Rye didn’t exactly smile, but his eyes narrowed in amusement.

  The waitress returned with their food, and the moment dissolved. Cora caught her breath, and after the waitress had left, she forced herself to sit up straight. “I’m not mad. I asked. It would be unfair of me to get mad.”

  “But you don’t like it? You don’t like for me to think of you that way?”

  Her face reddened.

  “Is it the religious stuff? Is it immoral for me to talk to you like this?”

  She let out a laugh. “No. Actually, I’m not that religious. I go for my mom. No, I’m not upset. I don’t mind that you think of me that way…” That didn’t come out how she wanted it to. “I mean, it doesn’t bother me…I…”

  “Do you like it, Cora? Do you like knowing how much you turn me on?”

  A fresh wave of heat colored her cheeks. With wide eyes, she stared at him. To keep her hands from shaking, she clasped them in her lap. “I’m just not used to this kind of talk.”

  He cocked his head again. “You can’t honestly tell me no one’s ever wanted you before.”

  She gulped down the nerves. How could she be expected to eat under these circumstances? Of course, no one had ever wanted her before. But she couldn’t very well tell him that. “It’s just…I’m a straightforward person. I’m not used to these games.”

  “I know that, Cora. I saw that last week when I treated you so badly. I’m not playing games with you right now. I’m laying it out there. I want you. I like you. So you tell me…do I have a shot or not?”

  Her mouth opened, closed, and opened again. She looked down to see her hands fisted in the hem of her dress. “I…I don’t know. I don’t think…”

  Rye leaned back in his seat, his eyes narrowed. “Are you attracted to me at all?”

  God, it was hot in there. She let go of her skirt and smoothed it over her thighs. “Um…it’s not about that…it’s just…”

  He frowned deeply. “You’re not? Not at all?”

  “No! I mean, yes. I mean…”

  “Cora!” The voice came from across the room. Rye and Cora’s heads turned simultaneously. Adam was coming toward them, followed closely by Cash. Adam slid into the booth next to her and gave her a quick peck on the cheek. Cash slid in next to Rye. “What are you doing here?” Adam asked.

  “Having lunch after church,” Cora answered, with far greater ease than she’d been able to answer Rye’s questions. In fact, she hadn’t answered Rye’s questions at all. She hadn’t been able to make her brain function what with the distracting ache and tension between her legs.

  “What are you doing here?” Adam asked, this time to Rye. Somehow, the same question he’d asked Cora, now sounded accusatory and slightly bitter.

  Rye’s expression went stony. That was the version of him Cora was most familiar with, yet she found herself missing the intense eyes and the hint of a smile. “Having lunch after church,” Rye repeated Cora’s answer.

  “Jeez, Adam,” Cash said as he stole a piece of bacon off his brother’s plate. “What’s with the attitude?”

  “I just didn’t expect to find my best friend on a date with your brother.” He managed to make the word ‘brother’ sound equivalent to ‘slug.’

  “It’s not a date,” Cora hurried to assure him. “We just ran into each other at church and decided to have lunch together.”

  Rye’s gaze was locked on her, but she couldn’t bring herself to meet his eyes. Adam slid his arm possessively along the back of the bench. “I see. Well, I don’t have to feel bad for interrupting, then.”

  Rye snorted and looked away.

  Cora wondered how she could be simultaneously relieved to have her conversation with Rye interrupted, and regretful of losing his attention. “What are you guys out doing?” she asked.

  “Just coming out of hiding to eat,” Adam said.

  “I’m starving,” Cash said.

  Cora let go of her own confusion, for the moment and grinned. “Whatcha been doing?” she asked suggestively.

  “Oh, you know, the usual,” Adam said. “Crossword puzzles. Scrabble.”

  “Cops and robbers,” Cash said, deadpan, and shot Adam a wink.

  Adam laughed and actually blushed.

  “What about you?” Cash asked, turning to his brother. “How did you end up spending your weekend?”

  Rye’s eyes locked with Cora’s. “Just sitting around. Went to church and got baptized, though.”

  Cash, who had been sipping Rye’s coffee, nearly spat it out. “What?”

  Cora couldn’t mask her grin as she remembered it. Big, badass Rye, marching proudly into the water, coming up like he’d just been given the gift of eternal life, and then acting like it was the most normal thing in the world. She’d been stunned silly, so it was no surprise to see the shock in Cash’s eyes. “It’s true,” she said. “He decided he needed a symbolic fresh start. Is that about right?”

  Rye’s lips quirked up as he nodded.

  “So…what does this mean?” Cash asked. “You got religion, now?”

  “No,” Rye said, “I’m just going to be a better person. Stop habitually flirting with women. Or most of them, anyway,” Rye said, with a look that burned straight through Cora.

  “Huh. Well, if it took baptism to do it, then I’m all for it,” Cash said. “You’ve been acting like a drunk frat boy for three years, now. It was getting pretty pathetic.”

  Rye turned and punched his brother in the shoulder. Cash grunted and rubbed his shoulder, moving slightly away.

  The waitress came by again, and the four friends kept the talk small. They seemed to all sense the tension between Adam and Rye. Cora was happy when they’d all finished eating and she could at last return to her home—a refuge from deep, blue eyes and unbearable heat.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  HE WAS ABOUT to resort to pulling petals off a flower and doing the loves-me-loves-me-not chant. After their lunch, Sunday, he couldn’t seem to catch a moment alone with Cora. Worse, he wasn’t sure whether it would do him any good if he did. He couldn’t seem to get a straight answer out of her. While he lay restless, at night, hard and aching for her, she might be sleeping perfectly soundly. He hated the not knowing.

  By Wednesday, he decided to keep chasing her. The rejections were painful, but they’d been formed in such a way as to leave him with a little hope. Just enough hope to hang himself with, probably. He couldn’t take it, though, and he had to try at least one more time.

  Just before the end of the workday, he waltzed to Cora’s office, knocked twice, and opened the door. She looked up from her laptop in surprise. “Hey, boss,” he said. “You wanna go have a beer?” He forced himself to breathe evenly, even though he felt like collapsing in relief. He didn’t bother to question why this little invitation made him way more nervous than asking a strange woman back to his apartment. It just did. He was beyond trying to understand his feelings for this woman.

  A slow smile crept onto her face. “Sure. Give me ten minut
es? I’ll meet you at the bar.”

  “Yes, ma’am.” He made his exit. He’d done it. Everything was cool. This was hardly a date, but at this point, he felt that a first date was a goal for much later down the road.

  Being the middle of the week, there wasn’t much of a crowd. He perched himself at the bar and ordered two beers. True to her word, Cora showed up just a few minutes later. She hopped up next to him and took a good, healthy drink of the beer he’d had waiting for her. “These are on me, this time,” she said.

  “Nope.”

  “Oh, come on.”

  “Can’t do it.”

  “You’re chivalrous? An old-fashioned kind of guy?”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  She shrugged. “Okay, then. I’m going to start getting expensive drinks.”

  “Fine with me.” He had his head resting on his fist and was watching her as she worked hard at playing cool. She hadn’t once made eye contact with him. “You hungry, boss?”

  She hitched that shoulder. “Not really.”

  “We should go get pizza.”

  “I’m good with a beer.”

  He nodded. That was fine. No pizza, though it would hardly have qualified as a dinner date. Maybe he should try asking her to lunch again. She’d gone with him once, and he had managed to pay, so it was almost a date. If only his brother and Adam hadn’t crashed the party.

  “So,” she said, “Adam and Cash seem to be getting along well.”

  “Yep.” He didn’t want to talk about Adam and Cash.

  “I haven’t seen Adam this happy in a long time. I kind of feel like that relationship is a little one-sided, though. What do you think?”

  “I think it’s none of my business.”

  She bit her bottom lip and still refused to look at him. In fact, she looked about the most uncomfortable he’d ever seen her. “Wanna shoot some pool?” he asked.

  She instantly relaxed. Even smiled a little. “Sure.”

  He put his hand low on her back, to lead her to the pool table. He also let her walk away from him so she could choose a cue from the wall, and he stood back so she could have space while she racked the balls.

  “You sure know how to handle a set of balls, Cora,” he said, wondering if he could make her blush. Or even better, smile.

  “Thanks,” she said, for some reason, not catching the innuendo.

  “That’s a great rack,” he said, not even trying to be clever.

  “It’s not like it’s a special skill,” she said, removing the triangle and gesturing for him to take his turn.

  Rye sighed, trying not to grin. He took his shot and then another. Cora moved around the table, checking her options. “You got kind of a short stick, there,” Rye said. “Why don’t you try mine?”

  She looked up at him with confusion in her eyes. Rye fought back his grin. He took her cue and set it aside. Then he grabbed her hand and pressed it around his cue. “Mine’s got a hard, straight shaft. Slick, too.”

  There she was. Finally, she started to blush. He let himself smile, as he moved around her, standing behind her. “What you wanna do is bend over and grab the butt.” He moved her hand to the base of the stick. “See the perfectly formed tip? Just slide that between your fingers, there…”

  “Oh, my God, Rye!” she shrieked, before turning and shoving him away.

  He was greatly relieved to see the amusement in her shocked expression. He laughed.

  “How on earth can you sexualize the game of pool?” she asked.

  Not for the first time, he was stunned by the innocence of her mind. “How can you not sexualize it? We play with balls and sticks and bend over a lot. It’s just right there.”

  Her mouth hung open as she came to terms with what had been right under her nose. “Oh, my God,” she groaned. “There’s something wrong with you.”

  “Everyone thinks it, Cora.”

  “Not me.”

  “Not until now. Now, you’ll be thinking about it all the time, won’t you?”

  He could see by her blush that he was right. “I’m not sure this is a good start to your new life.”

  “Listen, I’m directing all my dirty sexual energy toward you, now, so you’re going to have to toughen up. I mean, before it was dispersed amongst the entire female half of the population. You’re gonna get it full power and, frankly, I’m not sure you’re up for the task.”

  “Oh, I’m most definitely not,” she said.

  He sighed, moved around the table, and leaned back against the wall. “Listen, I can dial it down, for you, maybe to half-power. But that’s the best I can do. And only until you get used to it.”

  She laughed, shook her head, and took her shot. “I have a date on Friday,” she said.

  The words acted like a bucket of ice water. Rye watched her pocket several balls with precision. When she finally missed, he realized he didn’t want to take his turn. He didn’t want to play at all. But he forced himself to. “So you’re not interested in me,” he said. The words made him sick.

  He expected her to confirm his statement. When she didn’t, he stood and turned to her. She was fidgeting with her pool cue, worrying her bottom lip with her teeth, and staring at him. “I’m not…not interested in you,” she said.

  “Then cancel your date and let me take you out.”

  “Rye, I’d like us to be friends.”

  That was it. He returned his cue to the rack on the wall, before addressing her. “When a man wants a woman like I want you, and she says to him, ‘Let’s be friends,’ it’s just as good as a slap in the face.”

  She flinched. “I didn’t mean it that way.”

  “How did you mean it?”

  Her chest rose and fell with her quick breaths. “I…I find you attractive, but…but…”

  “But?”

  “I don’t…I don’t think I’m ready to take the risk.”

  He nodded and pressed his lips together. “Right.”

  “Rye, please don’t be offended—“

  “I’m not offended. I’ve done this to myself. I just wish…” he let out a frustrated laugh. “Fuck, it doesn’t matter what I wish. I guess, no offense, I hope your date doesn’t go well. I hope none of your dates go well for as long as it takes me to prove myself.”

  He left her there, staring at nothing.

  Cora couldn’t get the image of Rye’s disappointment out of her head. At the same time, she was glad to see it. She watched his expression turn to ice with just about everyone, lately, but with her, he was an open book. It was the very sort of thing that would help her come to trust him. She only needed time.

  She’d questioned whether she should go on the date. In the end, though she decided she wanted to cancel, she felt she owed it to Adam who had arranged the whole thing.

  She tried to forget about Rye so she could give her attention to her date. She’d begged Adam to double with her so she didn’t have to be alone. He’d reluctantly agreed and somehow managed to get Cash to show up. They were having dinner at Over The Moon, and she was the last to arrive. Gary stood when he saw her. They shook hands and sat across from Adam and Cash, out on the deck. Adam and Gary were dressed in sports jackets and ties. Cash looked like he’d just gotten off work, his cargo pants and t-shirt dirty and his jaw stubbled. Trying not to care. What was with the Holcomb boys and their obvious efforts to put the world off?

  Cash caught her studying him. “What?” he asked.

  She shook her head. “Nothing. You’re just a little underdressed.”

  He looked around the restaurant. “Yeah, well, if they don’t like it, fuck them.”

  Adam glanced at him uncomfortably, but Cora just laughed. “You and your brother…could you be more obvious?”

  He frowned. “What do you mean?”

  “I just mean that everything you do, every choice you make seems to be guided by your need to show the world that you just don’t give a shit.”

  Gary stiffened next to her. She wondered if it was because of her l
anguage or the confrontational way she’d just addressed Cash.

  Cash, though, actually grinned. “Yeah. Yeah, I guess you got us figured out. Only Rye seems a little different the past few days. Wonder why that is.”

  She wasn’t going to touch that one. She actually felt herself blushing and had to look away. Adam took the chance to change the subject. “So Gary,” Adam said, “I was telling Cora how much you like to cook.”

  “Oh, yes,” Gary said. “I admit, I’m a bit of a foodie. Do you like to cook?”

  “Um…” she looked at Adam to see what her answer was supposed to be. He gave her a subtle, wide-eyed nod. “I bake a little.”

  “Oh, I like to bake, too. Not too many people like to do both…the rules in baking are so much stricter than with cooking. Maybe we can get together sometime, and I can cook dinner, and you can make dessert.”

  “That would be fun,” she said.

  “I watch a lot of food TV. Can’t get enough of it, really.”

  “That’s cool.” She sat up, suddenly getting a hopeful thought. “Do you play video games? I’ve got a ton of PS3 games.”

  Gary looked at her like she’d just sprouted antlers. “You mean, like at an arcade or something? The kind kids play?”

  Apparently her encounter with Rye had given her the wrong impression of adult males. They didn’t all find it socially acceptable for an adult female to play video games. “Well, actually they make a lot of these games more for adults. You wouldn’t let a kid play Grand Theft. Adam loves playing with me.” She turned to him, looking for support. But Adam was also looking at her like she’d just lost her mind. He glanced nervously at Cash.

  “No, I don’t,” he said. “That’s ridiculous. I’m a grown man.”

  Cash was suppressing a grin. “Look at you. Trying to impress me.”

  Adam shrugged and hunkered down in his chair a little. Great, now she was embarrassing herself and her best friend.

  Gary cleared his throat and put on a brave smile. “Well, maybe you could show me sometime. Who knows? Maybe I’ll like it.”