The Hope of Refuge

by Cindy Woodsmall

  “Cara,” he whispered. Part of him wanted to yell her name and run over to see her. It was a foolish thought born from a childhood experience.

  Cara Atwater.

  Twenty years ago they’d spent the better part of a week building a friendship unlike any other he’d ever had. Her tomboy ways had made her more fun than most of the boys his age. Her eagerness to try everything, mixed with her excitement about life, had been permanently etched into his memory.

  When he’d left Dry Lake during his rumschpringe—his time to decide whether to become Amish or not—he’d gone to New York, hoping to find her. He’d lived and worked there for two years. He called the number for every Trevor Atwater, her father’s name, in the book. He watched for her in every park, restaurant, and store. Finally he gave up and moved to South Carolina.

  It might have been fun to reconnect with her back then, but now she’d become her mother’s child—returning with a daughter and obviously with a past that could bring nothing but heartache to Dry Lake.

  Malinda had caused a lot of division in the community. He couldn’t give Cara that same opportunity. Malinda left a legacy of grief—twice. Even Levina, Malinda’s grandmother, died waiting to hear from her again. Now Cara had returned to what had once been her great-grandmother’s place. Unsure what to think or feel, he watched her. What a mess her life must be in. No car, no house, no husband, no money.

  He’d been so sure her mother was turning her life around when she’d left here twenty years ago. She had an Englischer husband, so the community couldn’t make a way for her to leave him by giving her a place to live. Because she was desperate for a safe place for Cara, the community was willing to take in Cara. But Malinda had left here with her and never returned.

  The young woman in the tree drew a deep breath and folded her arms, looking as peaceful as she was beautiful. But looks were deceiving. Peacefulness did not describe her, and her beauty masked the troubled waters just below the surface.

  In spite of longing to talk with her, he wouldn’t go to her. The community, especially his father, had to be protected. First thing tomorrow he’d go into Shippensburg and buy her a bus ticket. Then he’d fix her a box of things that would make life a little easier on her and her daughter.

  As dawn eased the night away, Deborah stood in the laundry room, threading freshly rinsed dresses through the wringer before dropping them into the clean laundry basket.

  A driver would arrive for her soon, and she had a lot of clothes to hang out before then. She usually did most of the wash on Mondays, but there had been so much work left over from Saturdays auction, she hadn’t managed to get to it yesterday. Late Saturday afternoon she’d washed the clothes she and her family had worn during the auction to keep the mud from staining them. She’d meant to remove the items a few hours later, but she’d forgotten. So that’d caused her to do something she’d never done before—leave laundry on the line on a Sunday. It wasn’t acceptable to have the appearance of having done laundry on a Sunday. Early Monday morning realization of what she’d done smacked her, and she hurried out to remove them, but her newly sewn teal dress was missing.

  One of her friends was certainly playing a trick on her. When she found out who had masterminded this, that person had better watch her back, because paybacks were… fun. She’d begin by watching which of her friends blushed and who giggled the most the next time she saw them. That was a sure giveaway. Then she’d come up with a plan and get the rest of the girls to help her.

  After wringing out the last item, she tossed it in the basket. Carrying the clean, wet load, she went through the kitchen on her way to the front door. One glimpse of the room made her stop. Kitchen drawers were open, and utensils were strewn across the countertops. Obviously while she’d been in the laundry room with the wringer washer running, someone had come in search of something. As she headed for the clothesline, she saw Ephraim loading a crate into his buggy. Without seeing her, he climbed in and left.

  She grabbed a shirt and shook it. He must be trying to get a head start on the day too. She wondered what he’d been looking for in the kitchen. It had to be him. Almost everyone else in the household was still asleep.

  Her stepmother’s sister had arrived last night to help take care of the younger ones so Deborah could go to the hospital this morning. As she reached for a clothespin, she stopped cold. A ten-dollar bill dangled from the line. She laughed at the silliness of it before shoving the cash into her pocket. Money didn’t grow on trees, but it appeared to grow on clotheslines. Whichever friend had come up with this prank had planned rounds for it—one day taking the item, the next day leaving money for it. Maybe she should borrow ten dresses from the instigator and leave one dollar.

  Sunlight warmed her back, making the day feel as if it might be a good one. While she hung a pair of pants on the line, a horse and carriage pulled into her driveway. She’d hoped Mahlon would arrive for his workday in the cabinetry shop before her driver came to get her, but Ada was driving the rig. She stopped the buggy near Deborah, studying her but saying nothing.

  Deborah dropped a pair of wet pants into the basket and walked closer to Ada. “Gut morning. What brings you out this early?”

  “I thought maybe I left my roasting pan here on Saturday.”

  “I don’t remember seeing it. You know that every year I have a box of lost-and-found items people have left at the auction. But the last time I added something to it, there weren’t any pots or pans. We can go look, though.”

  She shook her head. “If you haven’t seen it, I’m sure it’s in one of the boxes of stuff I took home Saturday.” Studying the barn and pastures, she seemed to be searching for something. “I guess while I’m here, I’ll stop in at the shop and speak with Mahlon.”

  “Mahlon?” Deborah’s heart jolted.

  Ada wasn’t looking for missing pans. She wanted to find her son, which meant he’d been out all night again, and this time she’d realized it. But Deborah hadn’t seen him since yesterday when he came by the house after work. If he were already at the shop, his buggy would be parked along the fence nearest her house, and his horse would be grazing in the closest pasture.

  She looked but saw no sign of either. “I saw Ephraim leaving a little while ago. Maybe they’re meeting at a job site.” Or maybe Mahlon had been out with Eric again.

  Oh, ya, you’re probably right.”

  She hoped she was. She hated the concern on Ada’s face. If Mahlon was going off with Eric behind Ada’s back, Deborah would be tempted to tell him his mother deserved more respect than that. But Mahlon would say he wasn’t a kid and he footed most of the bills. She hoped Mahlon didn’t put her in this kind of spot once they married. She considered Ada a friend and hated not sharing what she knew to be true.

  Mahlon was the kind of man who needed time and space to work through the things that bothered him. Deborah worked through her issues with the help of her friends and church fellowship. Over the years they each had allowed for what the other one needed. When he was ready, he’d tell her everything.

  Her driver pulled into the driveway, and she didn’t have the laundry hung out yet. Ada wrapped the reins around the bar on the dashboard of her carriage. “I’ll finish that for you. Is there more to be washed?”

  “Ya, but you don’t have to—”

  “I know. But I’m here, and you need to go, so shoo.”

  “Denki, Ada.”

  “Gern gschehne. Now go.”

  Deborah gave her a quick hug and climbed into the passenger seat. Unrest concerning Mahlon rode with her for the hourlong drive to the hospital, and she silently prayed for him.

  Three hours later and with Becca’s errands behind them, she was in the car on her way home with her Daed and Becca. Distant rain clouds moved across the sky, and she hoped someone had taken the laundry inside.

  From the front passenger seat, Daed watched the scenery, making occasional remarks to the driver. He looked surprisingly well, and except for admitting to bei
ng very tired, he said he felt fine.

  As they came closer to Levina’s old barn, Daed pointed. “What’s that box?”

  Deborah peered through the front window, unable to spot it.

  Daed tapped the glass. “Pull over and let me take a look.”

  She saw the wooden box with a piece of a blue tarp covering the top sitting outside the barn door. It looked like the one Ephraim had this morning.

  Daed climbed out of the car, lifted the tarp, pulled a folded paper out of the side of the crate, read it, and returned it to the box. He replaced the covering and got back in the vehicle.

  “What were you reading, Abner?” Becca asked.

  He shrugged. “A note written by whoever left the box. Looked like Ephraim’s handwriting.”

  Becca frowned. “Well, who was the note to?”

  “It didn’t say. Just boiled down to instructions to keep what they’d taken but telling them they couldn’t live in his barn and they needed to leave Dry Lake.”

  Cara pulled Lori in the wagon her employers had loaned her. Scattered drops of rain caused her to head straight for the barn. Without a change of clothes for Lori, she wouldn’t chance that the cloud would pass on by. Her muscles ached from her second day of deep cleaning the Howards’ house. It was only Tuesday, and after leaving money on the line for the dress, she had ninety dollars in cash. It made her dream of having the comforts of her own place, one with books to read to Lori and beds with sheets and a pillow and a refrigerator with food and—

  “Look, Mom, someone left us something.”

  Cara blinked, snapping out of her daydream. A hundred feet ahead, right at the barn door, sat a box. An uncomfortable feeling stole through her.

  While on her lunch break today, she’d called half a dozen places, looking to rent something. The cost of living here didn’t compare to the expense of New York, but it was still several hundred dollars. It would take two weeks of working for the Howards to earn that.

  She didn’t dare hint to them that she had no place to live. They seemed like nice enough people, but that didn’t make them trustworthy. Still, they let Lori play in their backyard and didn’t begrudge Cara fixing herself and Lori a little to eat when she prepared meals for Mrs. Howard. While Mrs. Howard slept, Cara showered and washed her and Lori’s clothes. Hot water, soap, and shampoo had never felt so good.

  She went to the crate and lifted the plastic covering. At a glance she saw blankets, cans of food, and a can opener. Someone had figured out they were staying here, which meant they had to get out. Quick.

  A note caught her attention. While Lori knelt beside the box, looking through the stuff, Cara read the note.

  Whoever had written it had instructed her to leave Dry Lake and pick up two bus tickets that were already paid for. Destination: New York City.

  Alarm pricked her skin. Someone knew they were from New York?

  “Look, Mom, a cloth doll. She doesn’t have a face. You ever seen a doll without eyes?”

  “No, but I’ve seen men without hearts.”

  She laughed. “You what?”

  “Never mind. Look, sweetie, we can’t stay here. Whoever left this box of stuff said we have to move on.”

  “Why? We didn’t hurt the puppies or break nothing.”

  “I know. But we have to go anyway.”

  “But my puppy!”

  “Go tell him good-bye.”

  “No. He’s mine! Simeon said I could have him.”

  “Lori, we don’t even have enough food for us.” She bit her tongue to keep from cursing.

  Lori ran into the barn, crying.

  She followed. “We don’t have a choice, honey.”

  “Why? It’s a stupid old barn, and we’re not hurting nothing!”

  Cara sat down next to her daughter and waited. When the tantrum eased up, Cara would tell her again that they had to go, and then they’d leave without hysterics. The one thing that had made all this bearable for Lori was the puppy she’d claimed as hers, and now…

  The barn door creaked open, startling her. A police officer stepped inside. Her knees went weak.

  “Ma’am, can you come out of the barn?”

  She swallowed her fear and headed for the barn door.

  “You, too, little girl.”

  Panic rose in Cara. “Is there a problem, Officer?”

  “Just follow me, please.”

  Two police cars sat waiting outside. A female officer motioned to Lori. “Can I talk with you, honey?”

  Cara’s breathing came in short, quick spurts. The rain clouds skirted eastward, and she wished the threat of them hadn’t caused her to carelessly hurry to the barn. If only she’d waited…

  “You’re on private property, ma’am.” The man stood in front of her while the woman talked to Lori a few feet away.

  “There are puppies in the barn, and my daughter’s picked one out.”

  The woman kept trying to engage Lori in a conversation, and her daughter answered a few questions, but mostly her attention seemed fully on her mother.

  “The owner asked you to leave, both verbally and in a written note.”

  “Yes, but…there’s been a misunderstanding. I work not far from here.”

  “It’s our understanding that you’ve been stealing from the residents around here.”

  “My mom doesn’t steal!” Lori screamed at the man.

  No matter what answer Cara gave him, he’d check it out, so lying would only add to her problems. “I did take a few things.” She spoke softly, hoping Lori wouldn’t hear.

  “Where do you live, ma’am?”

  Tears filled her eyes. It was over. They’d take Lori. “Please, you don’t understand.”

  “Just stay calm, ma’am. Do you have an address?”

  Tears threatened as she shook her head.

  “Several homes in the area have been broken into lately.” He pointed to her dress. “Amish clothing and quilts are among the missing items.”

  Cara looked at Lori. Her little girl deserved better than a mom who failed her all the time.

  The man took a step back, and the woman moved forward and frisked her while he looked through her backpack. He pulled out the cash that Mr. Howard had paid for her work yesterday and today—nearly a hundred dollars.

  He held it up. “All tens, just like the missing cash on the report.”

  “But I…I earned that. You have to believe me.”

  “You’ve entered peoples unlocked homes and taken items.”

  “I said that already, but I didn’t steal that money.”

  The man pulled handcuffs from his belt. “You’ve been breaking and entering as well as stealing. Before we go any further, I need to tell you that you have the right to remain silent…” The officer rattled off things Cara had heard on television a hundred times.

  She tried to think of something that might get her out of this mess. “You can have the money. Please don’t do this, please.”

  The woman placed her hand on Lori’s head. “Unless you have a relative or someone who can keep your daughter, she’ll have to be placed in protective custody.”

  Broken, she looked at her daughter. “I’m sorry, baby. I’m so, so sorry.”

  Lori tried to run to her, but the woman held her.

  “Please turn around and place your hands on your head,” the man said.

  “Leave my mom alone!” Lori screamed and flailed against the woman’s hold, but she didn’t release her. In a minute Lori would be taken in one car and Cara in the other.

  All her years of holding on in the face of hopelessness drained from her. “Lori, honey, listen to me, okay?” Trying to keep from crying, she blinked. “This feels scary, I know, but they’ll take good care of you. You’ll be okay, and I’ll come for you soon. I promise.”

  “No!” Lori screamed. “Don’t let them take me!”

  When Ephraim topped the hill, he spotted two police cars in front of his barn. He slapped the reins hard against the horse’s back, spurring
her to quicken the pace.

  As he pulled to a stop, he saw a policeman holding Cara by the arm—or at least the woman he believed to be Cara. Handcuffs held Cara’s arms behind her back as her small body shook with sobs. The officer opened the door to the backseat of the patrol car.

  “Don’t take my mom!” The little girl kept screaming the same thing over and over as a woman officer held on to her arm.

  “Lori, you have to calm down,” the woman spoke firmly. Lori kicked at her, but the officer avoided being hit.

  Ephraim jumped down from the carriage. “What’s going on here?”

  The male officer turned to him. “Are this barn and land your property?”

  “Ya.”

  Lori couldn’t catch a solid breath, but her wails were haunting.

  “Then you’re the one who called the police about a thief and trespasser?”

  “No. Just let her go.”

  “We can’t do that, sir. We need to investigate her for suspicion of child endangerment and neglect.”

  Cara turned to him. “Please…” Tears brimmed. “Please help us.”

  What a mess. If he did any more for her than just speak to the police, it was sure to open old wounds. People didn’t trust Malinda when she last visited, and they’d be angry that he’d stepped in to help Malinda’s daughter—someone they might have heard had been roaming the community, drunk and stealing from them.

  She gazed into his eyes, silently pleading for him to help. He moved closer to her, wanting to ask so many questions. As he looked into her eyes, a moment passed between them. He knew she was not who she appeared to be—a worldly, troublemaking thief. He looked at the policeman. “This is all a mistake. The police never should have been called.” A flicker of recognition came to him. “You’re Roy McEver, right?”

  The man nodded.

  “Your father used to patrol this area before he retired. You rode with him some even as a kid. I’m Ephraim Mast. My Daed’s Abner.”

  “Oh yeah, he’s one of the preachers. And I remember you. While I was here with Dad one time, you invited me to play ball.”