‘Bugger!’ she said under her breath. ‘Don’t worry!’ she called as Emily rushed over to help her. ‘I’m OK!’
‘Are you sure?’ Emily asked.
‘Yes, yes, I’m fine… my silly heel.’ Flora, Max and Bella raced out of the front door to her aid. ‘Please go,’ Tasha said. ‘You’re late enough already.’
‘I can’t leave you injured!’ Emily protested.
‘I’m fine, honestly. I’ll feel much worse if you are late. Go. It’s nothing, really.’ She tried not to wince as she inspected the grit that was embedded in the palms of both hands.
‘Hi, darlings,’ she greeted the children, who had crouched by her side.
‘Are you OK, Mummy?’ they asked, concern plastered across their stricken faces.
‘Absolutely. I’ll be fine. Now GO!’ she instructed Emily. Finally persuaded, Emily ran down the street, calling ‘Thank you!’ behind her as she went.
‘Here, Mum, let’s get you inside. Now what have you done?’ Flora asked, dropping her favoured sulky-teenager attitude and taking on the mantle of responsibility that came hand-in-hand with being the eldest child.
Tasha tried to get up but her ankle was so painful she couldn’t face moving just yet.
‘Mum, can’t you stand up?’ Bella asked.
‘I’ll help you!’ Max said, offering his shoulder for support. ‘I’m really strong.’
‘Thanks, darlings, I’m sure it’s fine. I just need to take my time, probably.’
‘You need a doctor,’ Bella announced. ‘Even doctors need doctors sometimes…’
‘Good idea!’ Flora smiled at Bella. ‘Shall I get the doctor who lives opposite?’ Flora asked. ‘The lights are on so he must be home.’
‘No, don’t worry,’ Tasha said. She shifted her weight, wincing. It really was painful. She probably did need some help.
‘Come on, Mum. I think you need help,’ Bella echoed her thoughts.
‘Yes, let’s get the doctor,’ Max insisted.
She had to agree it wasn’t a bad idea. If only it weren’t Javier though. He was the last person she wanted to rely on for help.
‘OK,’ she said, admitting defeat. ‘Flora, why don’t you go and knock on the door?’
Javier opened the door after a minute or so, quickly assessing the scene in front of him.
‘Mum’s hurt her foot, we think,’ Flora said. ‘Will you please come and help us get her inside?’
‘Tasha!’ Javier rushed over and knelt by her side. ‘Are you OK? What happened?’
‘I’m fine. I think. My heel broke and I’ve gone over on my ankle. It’s pretty sore, it’s probably just a sprain…’
‘Here, let me help you,’ he said, offering her his hand.
‘Thank you,’ she muttered as he hauled her up to sitting.
‘Does this hurt?’ he asked, gently examining her ankle. She nodded, wincing as her ankle throbbed in pain. He was so handsome, the classic hero rescuing her in her moment of need. She knew most women would love nothing more than to be in this position, but she couldn’t feel anything other than awkward embarrassment, not to mention dread at what Charlie would think when he found out that they had had further interaction. Despite all this Tasha found herself wishing that she had shaved her legs, telling herself off immediately for caring. ‘It does look like a sprain,’ he said. ‘We need to get some ice on it. And you’ll need to rest it.’
‘That’s what I thought,’ Tasha said. ‘At least a sprain should heal relatively quickly.’
‘Poor you, Mum,’ the children said. There was nothing they loved more than a good injury to fuss over.
‘Oh, God, this is the last thing I need,’ Tasha groaned. ‘I’ve just started a new job.’
‘Oh, really? Did you apply to retrain in the end?’
‘No… nothing like that. It’s completely new,’ Tasha continued. ‘I’m temping at a hedge fund.’
‘A hedge fund? That is different!’
‘Tell me about it!’
‘Do you like it?’
‘So far…’
‘Well good for you,’ Javier said, helping her to her feet. ‘That’s fantastic.’
She tested her weight gingerly on the offending ankle. ‘Ouch.’ She winced.
‘Here.’ Javier pulled her arm around his shoulder and supported her as she hobbled towards the front door.
‘Thanks,’ she said. ‘It’s really kind of you.’
At the door Tasha turned to him, having transferred her weight onto Flora’s proffered shoulder. ‘We’ll be fine from here. Thank you.’ She smiled, communicating with her eyes just how inappropriate it would be if he came in, given the circumstances.
He nodded, signalling that he understood exactly what she meant. ‘Right, kids. You need to make sure Mummy sits down and raises her leg up high with a packet of frozen peas to stop any swelling. Doctor’s orders. And you need to be very good and very helpful,’ he instructed. Bella had scooped up the contents of her bag and was carrying it inside.
‘Are you a real doctor?’ Max asked, clearly impressed.
‘I am indeed, just like your Mum, so you’d better do as I say.’ Javier winked.
‘That tactic doesn’t always work for me, does it darling?’ Tasha laughed. Max smiled and shook his head sheepishly.
‘If you need anything, just give me a call,’ he added, looking at Tasha. ‘I hardly need to tell you this but ice, rest, elevation,’ he repeated as he walked back across the street.
‘Thanks!’ she called after him. She hobbled into the sitting room and lowered herself onto the sofa.
‘Is it really painful?’ Bella asked.
‘It’s not too bad,’ Tasha replied. ‘It’ll be much better with some ice on it.’
‘Ta-da!’ Flora arrived back into the sitting room flourishing a bag of peas. ‘I found some.’
‘Thank you, darling,’ Tasha said. ‘Max, would you be an angel and put a couple of those cushions in a pile for me, please?’ Her team of young nurses soon had her resting her leg in an elevated position as Javier had instructed.
Just as she got settled her phone started to ring.
‘It’s Dad!’ Max said excitedly, answering the call.
‘Hi, Dad!’ The children crowded around the screen.
‘Hi, darlings!’ Charlie replied.
‘Guess what’s happened to Mum!’ Max spun the phone around to show Tasha prostrate on the sofa. The children certainly loved a bit of drama.
‘Hi!’ Tasha said.
‘She’s sprained her ankle,’ Bella announced gravely.
‘But it’s OK. The doctor helped her,’ Max informed Charlie.
‘Which doctor?’ Charlie asked. Tasha could immediately hear the change in his tone of voice.
‘You know, the neighbour opposite,’ Flora explained.
‘Oh, that one!’ Charlie said. ‘How kind of him.’ His voice was laced with sarcasm only Tasha could detect.
‘Flora asked him to help. I was out on the street and couldn’t get up,’ Tasha explained as Max angled the screen towards her.
‘I see,’ Charlie said, suspicion shadowing his face, and irritation. ‘Is it definitely a sprain?’
‘Apparently so.’
‘How can you be so sure?’
Tasha paused. ‘Er… Javier examined me.’
‘You needed another doctor’s opinion, did you?’
There was silence. Tasha wanted the ground to open and swallow her. She felt so awkward. ‘It’s fine now.’
‘It’s not fine,’ Flora said, peering closely at the ankle in question. ‘It’s very swollen.’
‘Poor Mum.’ Bella came over and stroked her forehead before kissing her on the cheek.
‘We’ll look after her, don’t worry, Dad,’ Max said. Tasha doubted he was too worried. ‘We’ll be extra good at bath time and we’ll go to bed without a fuss.’
‘Good,’ Charlie said. ‘I’m glad to hear it. So, how were your days?’ he asked as the three children sat on
the other sofa to have their nightly catch-up.
As Tasha listened she noticed that Max didn’t say anything about getting into trouble at school. She watched him closely; he seemed happy enough. Of course it was true; just because he seemed all right at home didn’t necessarily mean he’d be the same at school. As the children said goodbye to Charlie she told him she’d call him later, that there was something she needed to discuss with him. He didn’t exactly look thrilled at the prospect. She could tell he was still annoyed about Javier helping her.
She relied on Flora to help her up the stairs to supervise bath and bedtime, deciding to stay upstairs rather than go back down again. She hoped that by putting no strain on it at all and keeping up the ice packs the swelling might reduce in time for tomorrow. Flora brought her up a bowl of risotto, cooked by Emily, who had luckily made enough for leftovers, and she also brought in a large supply of disposable ice packs from the first-aid box.
Later, when the children were in bed and while Tasha lay propped up with pillows under her throbbing ankle, the doorbell chimed. There was no way she was going to attempt the journey downstairs to answer it. Maybe it was Charlie coming to make sure she was OK? But if it was he would just let himself in with his key. A minute or so later her phone bleeped with a text message.
Hope your ankle is OK and you are resting. I’ve left an old crutch by your front door, I broke my foot a few years ago in a bike accident. Try to keep the weight off it for the next couple of days. Hope you are all right? Javier x
How kind of him, she thought. She might have royally screwed up her marriage because of him but she could still see why he had been so irresistible to her. He was such an alluring mixture of mystery, confidence and charm. She typed a reply:
Can’t make it to the door but thank you. I really appreciate it. Tasha
She hesitated about whether to reciprocate the kiss, knowing how Charlie would feel if he could see it. She pressed send then deleted both messages, just in case they could somehow come back to haunt her at a later stage. After last time, it just wasn’t worth the risk.
She decided to call Charlie. She would tell him about the crutch, knowing there was no point in concealing the truth from him with three extremely informative children around.
‘Are you angry?’ she asked.
‘What do you think?’
‘I’m sorry. It was just that he happened to be there.’
‘Of course, I don’t like the idea of that man being anywhere near you, or my house, or my children. You can hardly blame me!’
‘Of course not.’
‘I don’t want you to give him the time of day.’
There was silence.
‘You wanted to talk?’ Charlie asked, his voice clipped.
‘Yes. I got a phone call from Mrs Hemmingway again today asking me to come in.’
‘Flora again?’ His voice immediately softening with the change of subject.
‘No. It was Max this time.’
‘Oh. Why, what’s happened?’
‘Apparently he’s been acting up, being too rough with the other children.’
‘Have you spoken to him?’ Charlie asked, sounding concerned.
‘School has. I said we would too. I didn’t get a chance this evening, but I thought maybe this weekend we could?’
‘I’ll definitely talk to him,’ Charlie said. He was very strict about violence and Tasha knew that he would take it seriously. She explained about the worry box and told Charlie she’d make it with Max on Saturday morning, ready to take to Charlie’s flat when he picked them up before lunch.
‘Well, I suppose it’s not a bad suggestion,’ he said.
Tasha began to feel a bit better about things as they talked it all through. She loved the feeling of support that came with co-parenting, and was thankful that they had always managed to keep their children a priority throughout all the upheaval. She had to give Charlie credit: no matter what he was feeling about her he had, as far as she knew, never given the children a single inkling as to what was going on inside his head.
Chapter Forty
A roaring fire crackled and hissed in the hearth at the pub Becca had chosen for lunch. They sat at a table nearby to warm themselves from the frosty October air outside, placing their orders with a passing waiter and asking for a couple of glasses of Merlot.
‘So how was the fortieth last night?’ Tasha asked, slightly jealous having spent the evening alone defrosting the freezer.
‘Fun, thanks, though I’m feeling a little worse for wear this morning. I probably overdid it a bit.’
‘Was it weird without Andrew?’ He had returned to Iraq the previous week.
‘I’m actually quite used to it. Though obviously I’d rather not be on my own.’ Realising that Tasha might not have much choice in future, Becca added, ‘Sorry… that was insensitive.’
‘Not at all. And you’re right, going to parties and stuff must be hard. I haven’t actually been to anything yet without Charlie. I keep making excuses so I don’t have to.’
‘Ah… hair of the dog!’ Becca said as she sipped the wine that had just arrived. ‘It’s so nice to come up to the city and have some time without the children.’
‘I bet. I imagine the next few months are going to be pretty manic for you.’
‘Don’t remind me!’ Becca laughed.
‘How did Andrew seem when he left?’
‘Riled up and ready to go but obviously sad to leave us at the same time, especially the kids.’
‘And how did Charlie seem the other weekend?’
‘We didn’t really talk about you two. It didn’t seem right to bring it up in front of the kids, and at dinner on Saturday night I couldn’t get a word out of him. He seemed tired though. I can tell he isn’t as happy as he always has been with you.’
This made Tasha feel the tiniest bit better. Their plates of food arrived, piled high with roast pork and all the trimmings, including huge strips of golden brown crackling.
‘This is absolutely delicious!’ Becca said as she devoured her food. ‘The perfect hangover cure.’
‘Isn’t it?’ Tasha agreed. ‘And how does Daisy seem to be coping with it all?’
‘She’s drawing lots of pictures of Andrew, she constantly makes him presents and cards for us to send him or give him when he gets home. Apparently it really helps children deal with their emotions if they write things down, or draw.’
‘That makes sense. Did I tell you about the worry box we have for Max?’
‘I don’t think so. What is it?’
Tasha explained how it works. ‘He hasn’t used it much. I keep checking it before bed and telling him that it’s there if he wants it.’
‘Perhaps even knowing that he can use it helps him feel less worried. What about Flora? Is she still up and down?’
‘Not too bad at the moment. She goes through phases of thinking she is to blame. Even Bella has been a little quieter than usual lately.’
Becca was the ideal person to talk to. She had a lot of experience with children missing their father’s presence, after all. She shared a few ideas that she’d tried with Daisy, like keeping a journal for him to read when he got home. They treated themselves to sticky toffee pudding for dessert with their coffee, before paying the bill and heading back to their family homes, ready to welcome their various children back for a cosy Sunday afternoon in front of their own fireplaces: Daisy and Fergus back from Becca’s mum, and Max, Flora and Bella back from a weekend at Charlie’s.
That evening Tasha checked inside Max’s worry box as she tucked him into bed. There was a note inside covered in his spiky writing and she asked him if she could read it.
‘I am worried about Christmas,’ it said. She read it aloud with a lump in her throat and asked Max what he meant.
‘Where will we be?’ he asked. ‘Will we be at Daddy’s or here? Will Santa come to Daddy’s? Will he know where we are? Will we all be together?’
Tasha couldn’t bear it; he h
ad obviously been thinking about it a lot. Her heart swelled with emotion as she tried her best to answer each question.
‘Darling, part of the magic of Santa is that he always knows how to find children. He knows exactly where each child in the world is. Otherwise, if you were to stay with friends or go on holiday you might not get any presents, and that wouldn’t be fair, would it?’
Max seemed relieved to hear it. ‘OK.’ He nodded.
‘And even if we are not all together at Christmas, we will always be together in our hearts. It’s like Uncle Andrew. Even when he is away he always stays with Auntie Becca and Daisy and Fergus, right in their hearts.’
He seemed somewhat comforted by this, but not entirely. Tasha tried her best to reassure him, giving him extra stories as she tried to settle him down to sleep. For Tasha, seeing the children struggle was hands down the worst part of it all. She just couldn’t bear to see the price they were paying for her mistake.
Chapter Forty-one
In November the boiler broke down just as the icy tentacles of winter unfurled and the temperature plummeted. Unwilling to spend longer than necessary without hot water or central heating, Tasha was forced to take a day of holiday to wait in for British Gas. Bath time the evening before had been cancelled and they had all spent the night huddled together in Tasha’s bed, each child having woken from the cold.
Tasha filled the machine with load after load of washing. She found it impossible to keep on top of the laundry now she was back at work and the laundry baskets were all overflowing. While she was waiting she decided to make a start on Flora’s birthday cake, for which neither heating nor hot water was required. Much to Tasha’s disbelief, Flora was turning eleven on Saturday. She had decided to attempt a replica netball for her cake. Following in Bella’s footsteps, Flora had asked for a family day out ice-skating as her birthday present. Thankfully Tasha’s foot had mostly recovered over the last few weeks. She had relied heavily on the crutch for the first few days until the swelling had gone down, hobbling around the office trying her best to maintain her productivity levels despite her injury. She knew ice-skating wasn’t the best idea but at least the boots should be sturdy enough to support her ankle. That reminded her – she needed to give the crutch back to Javier. And she also needed more eggs for the cake.
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