The Diary of a Side Chick 6 (SCD)

by Tamicka Higgins

  “Okay, okay,” Desirae said. “I’m no child, Mama. You ain’t got to go talkin’ to me like this. All this ain’t even necessary.”

  Karen smacked her lips together, imitating Desirae’s rather urban demeanor and mannerisms. “Well I’ll tell you what was not even necessary, Desirae,” she said. “The fact that I had to get up out of my sleep because one of your children were crying when you were outside in the car with some suspicious-looking man is what is not even necessary, if you want to know the truth. It’s time to grow up, Desirae. It’s time to grow up.”

  “I am grown up!” Desirae snapped. “I’m tired of you talkin’ to me like I don’t know what I’m doin’. I’m tryin’, Mama. I’m tryin’. I keep havin’ stuff happen to me and it just ain’t fair.”

  Karen noticed the way her daughter’s eyes were swelling up, trying to sympathize with her struggle in a situation most women would not be in, young, alone, and with twins.

  “Well, I’m sorry you feel that way, Desirae,” Karen said. “But that’s life. You laid down with some man that really didn’t want to be with you. I don’t know what you were after, but I know what you’ve got. Don’t make me have to get up out of my sleep again to tend to your responsibilities. I actually have to get up and be at work in the morning. Goodnight.”

  Karen ended her sentence sharply, turned around, and headed back out into the dark hallway. Seconds passed then Desirae heard her mother’s bedroom door close. She rocked Titan in her arms, calming him down before she checked both him and James to see if they needed to be changed. As luck would have it, neither of them did. Desirae set Titan back down in his basinet before shutting her bedroom door, turning the light out, and lying face down in the bed.

  “Why me?” Desirae asked herself, her voice muffled by the comforter. She rolled over. “What am I gonna do?”

  Just as she had moved her body, she heard the crinkling of the money in her pocket that D’Mann had given to her. She thought about how that money was really just about all the money she had on her. Once she got around to cashing her check, she’d have a couple of hundred dollars more. However, even she knew that she would still be the same level of broke regardless.

  As Desirae lay in the dark, the entire situation with D’Mann played over in her mind. She thought about every point, from when she’d gone upstairs, to when she’d heard the gunshot, to when D’Mann had come upstairs to get her. Out of all of the guys she’d messed around with since she was in high school, she could honestly say she’d never been with one who had to take somebody’s life while she was in the same vicinity. Even at this point, hours after the fact, it still didn’t seem real. Desirae was paranoid that somebody would come knocking on her door in the middle of the night and take her away in handcuffs, charging her as an accessory to murder or something similar.

  Thinking about these things only led Desirae to think more about D’Mann. He’d already shown that he was so giving. And it was even better that he didn’t want anything in return from her. However, Desirae couldn’t look past the fact that D’Mann was obviously doing well for himself financially. Everything about his house screamed not only that he had money but also that he had some class about him.

  When Desirae had grown tired of lying in the dark with only her feelings, she grabbed her phone. Her mother’s words echoed in her head, reminding her that desperate times really do call for desperate measures. The entire situation with Greg was a total flop, but Desirae saw that she might have some potential to get something going with D’Mann. At this point, Tron was old news – water under the bridge, so to speak. Desirae texted D’Mann: I gotta get out of my mama’s house, ASAP. I gotta get up out here.

  Chapter 10

  Desirae woke up a couple of hours earlier than usual the next morning. She’d gone to sleep with a headache and had woken up feeling a bit angry. Slowly, she worked her way out of bed and headed downstairs. Just as she was making herself some tea, shaking her head at how similar to her mother she could be at times, she heard what sounded like paper hitting the front door. Desirae made her way to the front of the house and opened the door. Just as she’d guessed, it was some sort of neighborhood association publication. It sat smack dab in the middle of the porch.

  Desirae stepped out onto the porch, grabbed the magazine, and looked up. To her horror, her eyes met with eyes she’d seen recently. They were the eyes of this teenage boy who lived down the street – the eyes of one of the people who stood by and watched Greg’s wife violently have her way with Desirae. Even though this kid was easily only fourteen years old, Desirae could read his eyes and tell what he was thinking. He looked her body up and down, playing the front yard fiasco over in his mind. The kid smiled and nodded, in a very sexually suggestive way.

  Desirae rolled her eyes and walked back into the house. Not paying any attention to the sexual innuendo the teenage boy had made from the sidewalk, she closed the door. With her back pressed against her mother’s front door, she closed her eyes. It all seemed too real again. She realized why she kind of stayed away from people she knew for the last several days. She could only imagine how other people up and down the street would look at her.

  As Desirae went about her morning, forgetting about the teenager out on the sidewalk, she went to the kitchen. There, she cooked herself some bacon, eggs, and a couple of slices of French toast. No sooner than she’d sat down at the table, she realized she’d forgotten her cell phone upstairs. She dashed upstairs to get it and returned to the kitchen. Now, at the table and in front of her plate, she scrolled through her text messages to see what she missed last night while she’d been asleep. Part of her, even if only subconsciously, wondered if Tiffany would have sent an apology message. Desirae had thought about that entire situation briefly as she fell asleep last night. She’d chalked up Tiffany’s sudden and swift attitude change to the fact that she was feeling some kind of way about her grandmother on the other side of the family being in the hospital, as well as her insecurity with having Desirae coming around her man, Reggie.

  As Desirae opened her missed messages icon, her phone began to vibrate with a call. It was Tron. She rolled her eyes and looked up at the ceiling. “Ain’t this somethin’?” she asked herself, rhetorically. “A nigga ignored me at first, and now he can’t get enough of me.” She quickly thought back to when she and Tron had been standing in this very same kitchen, and she’d thrown her glass of cranberry juice onto his face. The look on Tron’s shocked face showed his surprise, as well as the feeling of powerlessness that comes over a man when he is unable to retaliate against a woman for her actions.

  “Hello?” Desirae asked, trying to sound pleasant.

  “Good morning, Desirae,” Tron said. “How are you?”

  Desirae shook her head, holding back a giggle. She found it hilarious how she’d practically whipped Tron into being more respectful toward her. Never, in all the months the two of them had known one another, had he actually started a phone conversation by asking her how she was doing.

  “Calm down, Tron,” Desirae said. “No need to be all formal with me and stuff.” She could hear Tron groan. “I’m doin’ good. How you doin’?”

  “I’m okay,” Tron said, flatly. “Look, I was callin’ for a reason. My mama is comin’ to town.”

  “Oh,” Desirae said, hearing the serious tone in Tron’s voice. “So, what are you saying? Are you trying to have us meet or somethin’ and we all have a family kind of day out?”

  “No, not exactly like that, Desirae,” Tron answered. “Actually, I’m callin’ you cause I’d like to get James and Tron, and they can spend the night with me and my mama. You know, she is waitin’ to get to spend some time with her grandchildren, Desirae. C’mon, don’t make this any harder than it has to be.”

  “I ain’t, I ain’t,” Desirae said. “But where they gon’ stay at? I don’t want them over there and bein’ up in the middle of the night and bein’ with that fuckin’ hoe I thought was my friend.”

  “Desirae,”
Tron said, “it ain’t even like that. And no, it won’t be over here. My mama is stayin’ with one of my great-aunties up here, up north in Nora. She had like three or four kids, so her house is basically set up for kids. She also watch her grandkids and a couple great grandkids or somethin’ like that every once in a while.”

  “Hmm, hmm,” Desirae said, still feeling a little skeptical about such a request. “Okay, I guess. When was you try’na come pick them up and stuff? Do you got car seats for them or do you gotta get mine outta my car?”

  “Friday,” Tron said, answering Desirae’s first question. “And I’mma get car seats. It’s no problem. You don’t need nothin’ do you?”

  I need to get some fuckin’ income goin’, Desirae thought. She then filtered her response to Tron. “I’m okay for now,” she answered. “Of course, we can always use more diapers. How many nights was you try’na have James and Titan over there with your mama?”

  “See, that’s the thing,” Tron said. “I don’t know. She said she might leave Saturday if the weather is bad in the afternoon because it might supposed to be raining, or at least that’s what I think I saw on the news when I was gettin’ home and shit this mornin’. But I don’t know. If the weather is good, of course, you know she’d wanna keep them until Sunday.”

  “Well, I don’t have a problem with that,” Desirae said. “But I do gotta say one thing. I do think that I should at least meet your mama since I’m the mother of her two grandsons.”

  There was a long pause before Tron had even begun to say anything. “Tron?” Desirae said, on the edge as she anticipated his response.

  “Yeah, yeah,” Tron said. “And okay, we can do that. She’d be delighted.” Desirae could hear the latent sarcasm in Tron’s voice. “I can bring her with me when I come pick them up on Friday, if that’s cool with you.”

  “Friday?” Desirae said. “Okay. I can have them ready and have a bag packed for them and everything. It’ll be nice to finally meet your mama, Tron. I’m sure she’s a lovely lady and is gonna love me.”

  “Love you,” Tron said, his tone suggested he was lost in a daze of confusion. “Yeah, she’ll love you.”

  “And don’t worry,” Desirae said, smiling at the phone. “I’mma make sure I wear somethin’ real nice so I leave a good impression with the grandmother to my little twins.”

  “Desirae,” Tron said, “don’t come out that house wearin’ no hoe shit. I swear to God, if you try to pull some shit like that in front of my mama…”

  “Nigga, please,” Desirae said. “Don’t go back to that callin’ me a hoe shit, okay? Cause I ain’t no hoe and ain’t never been one. And don’t worry about what I’mma wear when I meet your mama. I’m always classy and never trashy. So, don’t even go there with me, okay?”

  “Man, whatever,” Tron said. “Well, that’s all I wanted. I’ll text you with the time that me and my mama will be over there on Friday in a little bit. Talk to you later. Bye.”

  Before Desirae could even respond with a goodbye of her own, the call ended. She set her phone down onto the table, shaking her head and rolling her eyes. The level of disrespect was just unreal.

  D’Mann then popped into Desirae’s mind. With today being the morning after she’d been at his house, Desirae was able to look at things in a different perspective. While she still struggled to come to grips with knowing that she’d been in the house when another man died, she still couldn’t deny that she had feelings for D’Mann. The first thing she did with this new information about Tron and his mother coming to pick up James and Titan was think about calling D’Mann. She knew she’d already be free for one day. If the weather held up, it could wind up being two days. At first, she was going to call D’Mann. However, after realizing that it was probably still early in the morning for him, she decided to send him a text. Within a few minutes, after she’d eaten a good portion of her breakfast, D’Mann was calling.

  “Why you text a nigga?” D’Mann asked, clearly sounding as if he’d just woken up. “You know you can just call a nigga. You ain’t gotta text.”

  “I ain’t wanna call and wake you up if you was sleepin’,” Desirae said. “That’s why I text you, you know.”

  “Yeah, but don’t worry about that shit,” D’Mann said. “I ain’t got no problem gettin’ up for you. What you got on for today? Wassup? Is everything okay? I saw the text you sent me a second ago about havin’ to get out of your mama’s house and shit.”

  “Yeah,” Desirae said. “I sent that last night. My mama gave her usual righteous ass speech to me when I came in the house last night, talkin’ to me like I’m some child or somethin’. I can talk to you about that later, but I just wanted to tell you that this Friday night, I’m not gon’ have the twins…just in case you wanted to know.”

  “Is that so, huh?” D’Mann asked. He then chuckled. “A nigga might have to take you out for a little treat or somethin’.”

  Desirae smiled. “Oh, really?” she asked, in her sweet voice.

  “Yeah, really,” D’Mann said. “So, what’s goin’ on with the twins. Is they grandmamma watchin’ they asses or somethin’?”

  “Yeah, but not my mama,” Desirae explained. “Tron’s mama is comin’ with him to pick up the twins on Friday, prolly in the afternoon, I guess.”

  “Yeah, I’mma have to come swoop that ass up,” D’Mann said.

  Desirae leaned back in her chair as the two of them talked about what they could possibly do on Friday night with the free time. At first, Desirae had wanted to tell D’Mann that she’d prefer to not stay the night at his house. Just the thought that a man had been killed in his basement might keep her up at night when she could be sleeping. However, when D’Mann talked about them going to the mall for a little while, Desirae decided to play her cards right and hold off saying some things.

  Chapter 11

  When Friday came, Desirae hadn’t even mentioned to her mother that Tron and his mother would be coming to pick up the twins for the weekend. She’d seen her mother, of course, and the conversation between the two of them had become a little cold. Desirae remained cordial, all the while knowing that she needed to get out of her mother’s house as soon as possible. With each passing day, there were just too many things to remind her of how stressful her life had become by moving in with her mother. At this point, however, she could only hope and wait that one of the jobs she’d applied for online would call her back. In the meantime, the money that D’Mann had given her was surely needed and very much appreciated. Desirae pitied Tron for this very reason, as he was so reluctant to help her out monetarily. Tron had texted Desirae earlier in the day, saying that he and his mother would be stopping by between 3:30 and 4 o’clock. Desirae looked through her temporary closet, trying to figure out what kind of outfit would be the perfect outfit to wear to meet Tron’s mother, while also being what D’Mann would like to see. Desirae had coordinated with D’Mann so that he would come pulling up only a few minutes after Tron and his mother left with the twins.

  At first, Desirae tried on a nice red dress she’d bought at a mall a couple of years ago. However, when she squeezed into it, she’d quickly found that it was too tight for her body. The weight that she gained had become more obvious, especially around her hips, butt and thighs. Finally, Desirae found some faded jeans with cute rips around the knees and on the thigh. She slid into a savvy-looking black shirt. Just the right amount of her cleavage showed, only being accentuated more by the fact that she had slid a gold chain around her neck. The charm on the chain, which was Desirae’s birth stone, sat perfectly in her cleavage. When she looked in the mirror, she had to take a few moments to turn around and see how she looked. She knew that the way these pants fit her would drive Tron up the wall. It would probably make him want to beg for the pussy, all while feeling helpless because his mother would be standing right there with him.

  ***

  “Tron, what does this girl look like?” Tron’s mother, Brenda asked. She sat in the front passenger seat,
looking at the road ahead of her as Tron drove the car down the interstate in Indianapolis.

  “What you mean what does she look like?” Tron asked, smiling. “You know, mama. She’s cute.”

  Brenda looked over at Tron and shook her head. “I know what that means,” she said. “All these months she been pregnant and done had the twins, and this is the first time I’m seein’ them. I ain’t even seen the girl herself yet. Somethin’ tell me this is not going to be the kinda young lady I’d want to see.”

  Tron thought it was nice of his mother to even describe Desirae as being a lady. However, he kept his sarcastic thoughts to himself. Part of him hoped and prayed to God that Desirae would at least be appropriately dressed when he pulled up with his mother. If she wasn’t, he didn’t know what he was going to do.

  “So, I noticed that you’ve been rather quiet on the Shawna front for much of the year,” Brenda said, looking out the window. “I take it the two of y’all broke up or somethin’. Would that be the case, son?”

  “Yeah,” Tron said, shaking his head. “Yeah, mama. That would be the case.”

  “Well, I’m not gon’ ask why,” Brenda said. “That’s the way it goes, I suppose. They never marry the ones you want to marry, or the ones that they ought to be marrying.”

  “Yeah, well,” Tron said. “It’s over at this point, Mama. So ain’t no point in even talking about that.”

  Tron turned off of the main road and onto the street Desirae’s mother lived on. He gripped the wheel a little more firmly as he realized in just minutes, his mother would be face to face with Desirae – face to face with the very chick he felt deep down had purposely gotten pregnant by him as a way of trying to keep him around.

  “Well, let me ask you this last question and I’ll let this subject die, Tron,” Brenda said.