Twelfth Night at Eyre Hall

by Luccia Gray

  “Well, as time passes, I am sure you will see for yourself that we are indeed well–matched in spite of our differences. Love has no boundaries.” I watched her hold his hand and smile, and I clenched my fists and gritted my teeth in disgust.

  “John, I promise you my whole life will be dedicated to your mother’s happiness and wellbeing.”

  It pained me to hear him speak of my mother in such terms, but I persisted with my charade. “I have no doubt that you have feelings for each other. In fact, I now realise I saw it all, long before it was obvious, yet I still find it hard to accept, and believe me, I would like to accept it, because it pains me…” I stopped, realising I was saying too much.

  “John, I want you to know that I loved your father dearly, in spite of the events that occurred before I met him, and after. I owe him everything I have, and part of who I am. I was but a child, only nineteen, when I met him and fell in love. His memory is dear to me. I have forgiven him, and I beseech you to forgive him, too.”

  “The road to forgiveness and understanding is not easy, but I hope to embrace it in the future.” I forced a smile.

  An uncomfortable silence ensued as they waited for me to speak. “I plan to continue my studies at Harvard, so I shall be away from Eyre Hall for some time.”

  “Harvard?”

  “Archbishop Templar has suggested I apply to the School of Divinity. I am anxious to learn more about the Lord’s word.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “No, I am not sure of anything anymore, but I must find out why I am not sure. And I believe that the scriptures can answer that question.”

  “When will you leave?”

  “Soon. Mr. Jackson has said he will join me, as he has business to attend to, and he has a house in Boston.”

  “Well, that is good to hear. How long do you plan to stay in Boston?”

  “A year, initially.”

  “So you will not be at Eyre Hall next Christmas, for the wedding?”

  “I am afraid not. I shall be back shortly after your wedding.” The wedding I was sure would never take place because by then, her reclusion would be well under way, and Michael would be in the gutter, where he belonged, or better still, in jail.

  “I suppose you have told Phoebe and her father that you are leaving?” my mother asked.

  “I was never actually engaged to Phoebe, as you may remember. You and her father were negotiating a future engagement between us, after her sister’s death.”

  “Of course, that is correct.”

  “Phoebe told me she had been approached by Lord Ingram’s grandson, James, and heir to his estate, with a proposal of marriage, and she has accepted, although her father would not consent unless I agreed, which of course, I did.”

  “I am sorry to hear that, John,” said my tactless mother.

  “Well, I am relieved. I fear I would have been a cuckold and a laughing stock in no time.” I was beginning to doubt there was an honest woman left on this planet.

  “I knew she was fickle, but I believed she might mature.”

  “Well, there is no harm done. I didn’t even like her.”

  “You will find the right girl, John. Be patient. You are very young.”

  “I thought I had found the right girl, until I discovered she was my sister.” I tried not to sound bitter, so that she would not guess how deeply I had been hurt.

  I remembered the archbishop’s words. “Keep away from Miss Mason. She is the devil’s daughter. Her mother was a sorceress. She bewitched your father, and other men.” No doubt, he was right, although I wondered if he had ever met Bertha Mason. My mother interrupted my thoughts.

  “John, forgive me for keeping the truth from you. I did not wish you to despise your father.”

  “So now I despise you all instead. You have all betrayed me and lied to me. Every one of you; my father, my mother, my sisters, my valet, my future betrothed. Is there anyone left to humiliate me?”

  “I am sure that when you ponder on it all, when time has passed, you will not be so distressed. You are a privileged young man. You have a fortune, good looks, good health, intelligence, breeding, and youth. Nothing will be beyond your reach, once you decide what it is you wish for.”

  “Perhaps that was my mistake. I thought I had it all and I always let someone else decide for me. I have never made a single decision on my own. Even this decision to go to Harvard has been suggested by Archbishop Templar. I need to take a hold of my life, and I cannot seem to be able to do so.”

  “John, you have been sheltered, and I may have been too persuasive. Making your own decisions will be hard, but beneficial in the long run.” My mother approached me and rested her hand on my shoulder.

  “Thank you, Mother, for your support and understanding. I have not deserved it recently. You are right. I am hurt and bitter, and I hope it will pass, because I am not happy with the man I am at this moment.”

  “John, you are my dearest first born son. You will always be special to me.”

  “Things will be different when I come back, Mother. I promise.” Hopefully, once she and her disgusting lover were out of my sight and securely confined, I would feel much better.

  “Shall we all have dinner together, this evening?” my mother suggested, as if I would ever want to share a meal with her repulsive young lover. How could she not know me any better?

  “I’m afraid I am going out this evening, Mother. I need some distraction. I will be going to the Rochester Arms.”

  She was about to speak when I noticed Michael take hold of her hand, the hand she had just used to comfort me. Had he no sense of decency?

  “I am sure John prefers to spend the evening with his friends, enjoying himself at the inn, Jane.”

  “Of course he does,” she said and smiled at her lover. I hated to see him touch her, and I hated to see her looking at him as if she loved him, because it was not love she felt. It was lust. He had seduced her. I needed to get as far away as possible and as drunk as possible, and forget that I had a senseless whore for a mother.

  ***

  John had planned to push me away from Eyre Hall, yet I had moved in as a result of the injuries he had inflicted. When I was able to walk without assistance, Jane insisted my luggage should be brought from the inn and that I should remain in the guest room for the rest of my stay. I only spoke to John on the morning he apologised, because he returned to Oxford the next day.

  I was uncomfortable at first with Adele and Mr. Greenwood, who tried their best to avoid addressing me. However, Dante, Susan and Annette joined us on many occasions and I felt at ease with their presence at lunch and dinner. Fortunately, Adele and Mr. Greenwood, Dante and Susan soon returned to London to prepare their new residences. The double wedding, which I would not be able to attend, would be held at Eyre Hall in a month’s time.

  In the following weeks, I rarely saw Annette who was spending more time at the hospital with Dr. Carter. Nell had returned to school in the mornings. I had been helping Jane interview the new staff and order the accounts, which were in disarray after the last few hectic months, especially with the wedding and funeral costs.

  After lunch, while Nell enjoyed helping Cook prepare endless batches of cakes and did her homework, which was mostly copying and translating Latin texts, Jane and I walked with the dogs down to the bench by the stream, and kissed until the sun set and Jane was so cold that even my embrace would not warm her.

  Shortly after dinner, Nell usually went up to her room, and Annette retired early. Jane and I spent long, lazy hours making love and chatting on the floor by the fireplace in the library, our favourite hiding place. My lips caressed her soft supple skin as my hands explored every fold of her acquiescent body. I could not imagine wanting anything else in the world except to smell her skin, and hear her satisfied sighs and soft, longing moans.

  The 26th of January came too soon, and I had to return to HMS Princess Helena. On our last evening, Jane handed me a small box. She had redesigned the re
d button by adding a gold plaque to its back and engraving it with the words: I love thee with the breath, smiles, tears, of all my life. J.E. There was also a long golden chain attached so that I could carry it as if it were a watch in my pocket or around my neck. I promised her it would be close to my heart every minute of the day.

  “I also have a present for you. I bought it in London, when I bought Nell’s hair band, but I was keeping it for our last night.”

  She opened the box impatiently. It contained four hairpins decorated with white cameos on a light blue background. She told me they were beautiful and handed them to me. “Perhaps tonight you can put some pins into my hair instead of taking them out.” I put them back into the box and whispered, “Later,” before locking the door.

  “Perhaps we should have a bed installed in the library,” she said as I helped her unfasten her dress.

  “That would be a pity. I have grown so fond of this rug, Jane,” I said, sliding my lips over her smooth shoulders.

  “Perhaps we should take it up to our bedroom,” she said, running her fingers through my hair.

  “Our bedroom,” I sighed, pulling her closer and nibbling her neck. “Sounds like heaven.”

  “When you return, there will be a bedroom in the new wing for us.” I groaned as she pushed her hands under my shirt. “With a very big fireplace, a rug, and an enormous bed.”

  “I would prefer a small bed and a huge rug,” I said as her lips slid down my chest. “I will wrap my arms around you all night, so we won’t need a big bed, but we could make good use of a huge rug, couldn’t we?”

  She sighed as her fingers followed her lips. “Yes, we could.”

  I caught her wrists and kissed them. “Patience, my love,” I said, and our words were replaced with the sound of kisses, moans, sighs, and finally, much later, muffled cries of pleasure.

  ***

  Chapter XXVII – Tranquil Intermission

  I never thought I would regain my peace of mind and the placid times I had once experienced at Eyre Hall. Everything was calm for the moment, and the future held promise. God had indeed been good to me and compensated me for my struggles, at last.

  In spite of the insistent banging of the building workers and the clouds of dust outside my window, I was feeling enthusiastic and optimistic for our future. I missed Michael every minute of the day, but I was keeping as busy as possible, making sure everything was ready for his return. I was also writing a novella, a horror story called The Countess, about a mysterious European noblewoman who has lived for hundreds of years in various physical forms. I had been influenced by Lord Byron’s Fragment’, and Mary Shelly’s Frankenstein, and carried away with the freedom such paranormal themes allowed. I was enjoying the escape my writing provided, although I was not sure if I would ever publish such a scandalously gothic and supernatural tale.

  It was time to write my letter to Michael, one of my most treasured moments. I imagined him sitting with me, across my desk by the hearth, listening to my account of the main events that had occurred in the last few weeks. He would smile, nod and listen patiently while I told him all the news.

  My Dearest Michael,

  I will begin by telling you how much I love you and miss you, although I know it will sadden you, but think that when you receive this letter I will be less miserable because your return will be nearer. Worry not, I am keeping very busy and in high spirits as you will see when you read the rest of this letter.

  Now, the news. Adele and Mr. Greenwood are happily settled in their London house, which I visited only at the beginning of this month. I made sure they had enough time after their wedding, in March, to settle in. Adele has employed so many maids that I was constantly bumping into one or another. I can’t think why she would need more maids in her London town house than I need here at Eyre Hall! She has told me the servants in London are far more troublesome and less hardworking than those in the country, forever watching the clock and refusing to work more than ten hours a day, and doing their jobs as slowly as possible. I am sure she exaggerates. Susan is doing very well with just one young maid, because Dante says he is not in need of a valet.

  Susan is managing very well in her new life. Her house is not too large and she has Becky to help her. Your sister may have spoken to you about her. Becky attended the parish school where Susan taught. Although she is only fourteen, she works harder than all of Adele’s fussy London maids, and she is very grateful to be employed by Susan. Dante is such a loving and devoted husband, your sister is indeed fortunate. Susan was rather large the last time I saw her, of course, the baby is due shortly. I shall be travelling to visit her as soon as she sends for me. I am so looking forward to our godchild. Susan says she feels it is a boy because he kicks profusely, and I am sure she is right.

  It will be wonderful to have a child visiting, and I hope often staying, at Eyre Hall. I trust the building works will be finished by then. I do not want to bore you with the details, but it is taking longer than I thought. So many pipes and ropes, and bricks and mortar, and clouds of dust and dirt, you cannot imagine! Thank goodness, it rains almost every other day and cleans the air. The men eat like horses, poor Cook is forever making bread, and cakes, and pies, as well as good hearty stews, but there is never enough. I am sure the work will be finished on time, and the new Eyre Hall will be ready for your inspection in August.

  When you return, we shall travel to London immediately to visit Susan and Dante, so you can meet your nephew, and we must buy paintings, furniture, lamps, and curtains to your liking for the new wing. I insist you help me choose every detail. I do not want to make any decisions at all, however big or small, without your advice and opinion.

  I have received a letter from John. It was short and curt, but he told me he was contented at Mr. Jackson’s house in Boston, which he says is twice the size of Eyre Hall. He seems most enraptured with the United States, marvelling at the enormous size and solemnity of its people, buildings, and the surrounding wildlife. He has been introduced to many of the local families and plans to stay with the Jacksons for the time being. He has started his classes at Harvard, which he is greatly enjoying. However, he signed the letter only ‘yours’, not adding ‘affectionately’ or any other loving words, which did upset me, but I am confident that in time his attitude will soften, once he finds some happiness within himself.

  Annette is spending a great deal of time with Dr. Carter at the hospital, although I see no romantic interest on her part. The good doctor is often a guest at Eyre Hall (I am doing my best to help him in his quest for her attentions), she is amiable towards him, but I am afraid there is no spark on her part. She does not love him. He thinks she will, and he is a kind, patient man, who is prepared to wait, but I have my doubts. In any case, they get on well and have similar interests. We will see what happens.

  Nell has just come back from school. She rushes through the house all afternoon like a lightning bolt, sometimes helping Cook in the kitchen or chatting with Beth and the new girls, or rushing outdoors with the dogs around the grounds, or watching the building works. I find it hard to convince her to sit and do her homework with me in the library, but I have insisted she should come to the library as soon as it is dark, which unfortunately is later every day, as we are approaching the summer. She is doing very well at school, excelling at maths, but she is struggling with her Latin translations. We are now reading ‘A Tale of Two Cities’, which she is greatly enjoying. She insists on writing a few words to you, so here they are.

  Dear Michael. I miss you and hope you are keeping well on your ship. Be very careful with the storms and the pirates. One day I should like to see your ship and travel across the seas with you. A big, big hug from Nell.

  She has just finished her tea and is rushing out with the dogs, in spite of the cloudy and drizzly day! Fortunately, she has not had a cold in months thanks to Dr. Carter’s care and advice. It would seem the lemon juice and honey she takes every day are working wonders.

  I fear I
have no more news for now, my love. I hope this letter finds you healthy and in good spirits. Please take care, remember you have my heart and I am waiting impatiently for you to bring it back.

  I love you more than ever,

  Jane

  ***

  Chapter XXVIII – Ransom

  “Mrs. Mason.” I looked up at Simon’s worried face. “A person has arrived wishing to speak to you, madam.”

  “A person?” I asked.

  “The person said, ‘I have a message from Kirkpatrick.’”

  “A message from Michael?”

  “Those were his words, madam.”

  Unease crept up my spine and lodged at the back of my neck, tightening my jaw. “Show him in,” I managed to say, closing the accounts books I had been overseeing.

  I could tell he was not English even before he spoke. He was tall, thin and dark, and dressed in black clothes with a brown sash and tall, black boots. He wore some kind of head garment, like a scarf, and a scar crossed his weather–worn face.

  I was also acutely aware that he brought bad news. Simon wisely stood behind him by the door, unwilling to leave me alone with the strange visitor.

  “You have a message from Lieutenant Kirkpatrick for me, sir?”

  “I have something for you, Mrs. Mason,” he said before throwing a round object with a chain on the table for me to see, while offering me a twisted smile. I jumped towards it, clutching it in my hands, and another spirit entered my body taking over my movements.

  I heard a scream, which shook the walls of Eyre Hall, and felt a reverberating thump as my head hit the corner of the table and a trickle of blood slid down my temples and dripped onto the floor. A sharp pain pierced my head and travelled down to my heart. I left my body and watched from the ceiling as Simon, Annette, and Leah rushed in and bent over me. I screamed, but no one heard me. I saw Simon thump my chest and heard him shout, “Call Dr. Carter, she’s not breathing!”