Heddas Sword.jpg

by Hedda's Sword (lit)

  Maleta's cheeks heated and she turned back to the conversation at hand. "Who goes?"

  "Jana, you, Cianan, Sarge, Gayle, Dagonet, Raven and Reva," Mother Kitta stated.

  Maleta liked the idea of a child coming along even less. "Can't she draw us a map?"

  "Nay," a small voice piped up, "she can't." Jana glared at her as she thrust a dripping cup into Maleta's hand. "The ways are old and in disrepair. I can find a safe way through, and better yet can show you a back way into the palace itself."

  Maleta gulped down the cold water. "How do you know this?"

  "I made friends with the palace baker. She likes children, even drifter ones."

  "I never want to hear that word out of your mouth, not ever again," Mother Kitta scolded.

  "Aye, ma'am." Jana's face turned earnest. "Asides that, though, the earth speaks to me. I'll be able to see a way through once I'm down there."

  "You'll stay behind us when we reach the gate," Maleta ordered.

  Jana rolled her eyes. "I'm not stupid."

  "Go get our team," Captain told Maleta.

  Maleta nodded and turned to find Jana at her heels. "Where are you going?"

  "You heard Mother Kitta." Jana grinned. "I'm part of the team."

  Hedda help us all. "Fine. Go get Raven and Sister Reva."

  "And Dagonet." Jana shot off like an arrow from a bow.

  "She shall never be happy chained to a tree," Cianan said from behind Maleta. "Namula is mad to suggest it."

  She whirled, hand on her sword. "Don't ever do that."

  He raised his hands and stepped back. "Were you looking for me?"

  Maleta nodded, cursing her jumpy nerves. Would she never be free of the fear? "We're off to open the gates of Soto. I need you to go get Sarge. Have you seen Gayle?"

  "In the orchard. Last I saw, Gayle mistook Ain for a tent stake and pounded him into the ground."

  The apple orchard. Maleta whimpered and closed her eyes. Her father's face flashed in her mind's eye, his head rolling to a stop at her feet, his eyes staring up at her.

  "Heyla, are you all right?" Cianan reached out to grasp her upper arm.

  Quicker than thought, she struck out and spun away. Her eyes snapped open and she glanced over to find him staring back at her.

  "What is wrong?" he asked.

  "Nothing," she stated. "Go get Sarge."

  Those cobalt eyes narrowed, and he shook his head. "What happened?"

  "Forget it." Maleta stalked away on shaking legs, wiping her clammy hands on her breeches. Heart pounding in her throat, eyes wide, she approached the orchard. "Gayle!"

  "Here." The rangy brunette strode toward her.

  "You're with me. Special mission. Let's go." As Maleta turned to go back to Mother Kitta, Gayle fell into step aside her. Maleta watched Gayle's braid swing as they walked. "Aren't you afraid someone will grab your hair in battle?" Maleta blurted.

  "If they're close enough to grab my hair, they're within reach of this." Gayle smirked and pulled her long knife. She sobered. "Trick is to never go unarmed – not even to the privy."

  Maleta nodded. Hard lessons learned too late.

  "How old were you?" Gayle's gaze was sympathetic.

  "Sixteen. Sunniva's guards killed my parents. Guess I got off lightly."

  "Except you can still see his face in every man you meet." Gayle looked around the camp and nodded toward Sarge and Cianan, striding toward Mother Kitta. "He's different than the others, you know. Honorable. Nice. He wears nobility like a second skin. It shines in his eyes." Her mouth twisted. "He wouldn't give the likes of me a second glance. You, on the other hand, he can't take his gaze from. I sat in the taproom the night you two met. Surprised the whole place didn't go up in flames. I know why you ran, but you should have stayed to see his face. A part of me would give anything to have someone look at me that way."

  Maleta found herself looking at Cianan as they approached the meeting, that pure golden aura blazing back at her. What would it have been like if her parents had lived, if she'd grown up normal? She'd be married by now, with children, she supposed. And Cianan would never have come. They'd never have met at all.

  Instead, he'd met a hard, broken creature. A weapon. A killer. He'd told her he'd come to prevent her death, but she'd a sinking feeling she was meant to die anyway. Mayhaps 'twas for the best. Marriage and children were no longer for her. Part of her heart ached at that loss. The mere thought of a man touching her in that way made her shake. But did she want to spend the rest of her life as an instrument for judgment?

  Cianan strode over to her, blocking her path. Gayle continued on. "Are you all right?" he asked.

  That rich whiskey voice sent a shiver down her spine. He stood close enough for her to feel the heat radiating off his body. What was she supposed to say? "As long as you don't sneak up behind me and startle me, aye? As long as you don't touch me, aye? As long as you don't stand too close, or look at me like that, aye?" He must think her insane. "I'm fine."

  "I worry about you."

  "About whether I'll be a liability on this mission?" Her mouth twisted. "I told you, I'm fine. A few dead watchmen, Sunniva's head and the Shamaru freed, and I'll be even better."

  He reached out to encircle her wrist with his fingers. "Nay, about you. Forget the mission. I am concerned for you. I wish you would talk to me."

  She tried not to tremble at his nearness, at his touch. "There's nothing to say. Everything's fine."

  "Something is not fine. You are jumpier than a glamoured witch in a room full of mirrors."

  "Ah-hem." A throat clearing behind them broke the tension. They turned to see Raven standing several feet back, out of earshot. "We're waiting on you two snails."

  Maleta had never been so happy to see her friend. "On our way." She tugged free of Cianan's hand and hurried over to where the group waited.

  "You leave at midnight, cross-country, on foot," the captain said. "We'll follow at the crack of dawn, day after tomorrow."

  Tzigana stood with Mother Kitta, raw agony in her eyes as she stared at Jana and Dagonet. Cianan strode over to her. "As we travel to Soto on foot, I have no need of Kikeona for now. She is a battle-trained war mare and will protect you better than any here. You most of all must reach Soto in one piece, or this is all for naught."

  Maleta saw Dagonet and Wolf relax at Cianan's words. Tzigana's eyes glittered with what Maleta suspected were unshed tears. She grabbed Jana in a crushing hug, glaring at the family's protector over the girl's head. "I hold you responsible for my sister's life. If anything happens to her, don't come back."

  Dagonet jerked. Wolf's jaw tightened.

  "I can't breathe," came Jana's muffled voice. She pulled away from her elder sister and frowned up at her. "I'll be fine. I'll be in the back, clear of the fighting. They're sending me out with seven bodyguards, for Goddess' sake."

  "Sarge is mission commander, on the basis of his knowledge of the area and leadership experience," Mother Kitta decreed.

  The group looked at each other. All professionals, none objected.

  "All right. Go get some rest. You head out at midnight." She strode away with Sister Reva and Raven. Tzigana dragged Jana off, with Dagonet and Wolf following. Captain spoke with Sarge and Gayle.

  Maleta turned to Cianan. "Go with Tzigana so you can get her set afore we go."

  "Come with me."

  "I don't think so. I've packs to prepare and we all need sleep. Sarge'll set a fast pace."

  "We have not finished our discussion."

  "Aye, we have." Maleta stalked to her tent and began stuffing her gear into her pack.

  "Can I come in?" Gayle called from the doorway as Maleta finished the last of it.

  "Come." Maleta watched Gayle carry in a pack and bedding. "Moving in?"

  "Just for tonight. Made it real obvious so you could have some peace." Gayle smiled, but her expression remained serious. "You need to talk to him, but on your terms, not his."

  Maleta collapsed in her bed
and threw an arm across her closed eyes. She didn't want to talk about it at all, least of all with Cianan. She did a quick Mandate in her head and started her sleep-inducing counting. The next thing she knew, Gayle called her name. The camp looked dark beyond the opened tent flap. Gayle stood there with a shielded lantern and a covered bowl.

  "Got some food for you," Gayle said.

  "Thank you – for everything." Maleta rose and rolled up her bedding, tying it to her pack. She took the bowl and wolfed down the mutton stew. "I'm ready, let's go."

  The camp sprawled quiet. Mother Kitta saw them off. "Hedda be with you."

  Sarge took point with Sister Reva, setting a brisk pace. Gayle, Raven and Dagonet made a small circle around Jana in the middle. Maleta positioned herself as rear guard. To her dismay, Cianan dropped back to join her.

  "Want some company?"

  Aye, just not yours. "No." Frowning as she tried to focus on Gayle's swinging braid, Maleta braced herself against the coming interrogation. But he surprised her by remaining silent as he strode aside her.

  'Twas a beautiful night. Maleta stared up at the stars, watching the Swan trying to take flight and the Bear marching toward the other horizon. The distant shadows of the forest approached. They traveled by moonlight alone, maintaining a pace Maleta suspected was set by Jana. The trees swallowed them up, into shadow. Maleta scanned their back trail as they wound their way through the trees.

  Cianan kept one hand on his short sword as he, too, scanned the woods. But there were few night creatures about. An owl floated overhead, sending small animals scurrying. They stopped for their first break afore dawn. Raven and Gayle took Jana off to relieve herself in privacy. Sarge waved Maleta and Cianan over to where he crouched with Dagonet and Sister Reva. He drew a rough sketch in the snow with a stick.

  "Here's where we are, 'bout three leagues west o' Delph. We can cut through th' hills an' make camp at th' old hermit's lodge. It's abandoned, but we've kept it in good repair an' it's shelter off th' ground an' out o' th' snow an' wind." He drew a line toward a big square. "Here's Soto. This is th' west gate," he drew an X "which is guarded by a couple o' watchmen. They patrol th' residential areas after dark. We should be safer slippin' through that quarter than Nobility Hill."

  Dagonet's face twisted into a vicious sneer. "They're Sunniva's cronies, gotten rich off th' dealers. Th' council are th' worst. They're th' second thing Tzigana plans t' disband."

  "Right after the dealers themselves," Sister Reva stated. "Hedda's sisterhood volunteered for that task."

  Maleta nodded. "I've no problem with using Hedda's Sword on them." Seeing Jana return with her guards brought back the memory of Sonja's death all over again. She noticed Cianan following her gaze. Jana grinned and waved at him. He smiled back. The kindness in that smile was almost enough to make Maleta reconsider her vow not to talk to him.

  Almost.

  Sarge stood. "Move out." They headed toward the old hermit's lodge. 'Twas a long, cold march, silent save for hushed tones at infrequent breaks. They paused for a hasty meal at mid-day, if dry journey bread and tough-as-leather jerked beef could be considered a meal. Maleta gave Jana credit – the girl wasn't a complainer, and kept up. They approached the cabin in late afternoon. It stood against the gleaming snow in the last waning glow of daylight, hunched betwixt two giant pine trees. Sister Reva scouted ahead while the rest of the group waited in the shelter of the tree cover. Once she waved the all clear they joined her.

  Maleta got a small fire going in the hearth, enough to melt snow into water for tea. There were six cots in the main room, and Gayle and Raven settled Jana into the one closest to the heat. Maleta brought her the first cup.

  "Thank you," the girl said.

  Dagonet came over. "Raven, you're off watch duty t' stay with Jana. Reva an' I take th' first watch. Sarge an' Gayle are going t' take mid-shift. Maleta, you an' Cianan greet th' dawn."

  Maleta froze. "Who made those assignments?"

  "I did." Sarge plunked his gear on the cot closest to the door. "Problem?"

  "Of course not," she lied.

  "Good." He grunted as he removed his scabbard and sat down to pull off his boots. "Sleep." He rearranged a makeshift bed as Dagonet and Sister Reva went back outside.

  Maleta watched everyone settle in with more cold rations as she took the cot in the far corner. She stashed her gear under it and tugged her boots off, then burrowed into her blankets with a winter bar. The image of the one-eared squirrel flashed into her mind's eye, and she smiled at the memory. Across the room, from the cot beyond Jana's, Cianan's eyes gleamed at her. She stopped smiling and frowned. He grinned back. She turned her back on him, repeated Hedda's Mandate and started sleep counting.

  A woman's voice dragged her out of sleep. "Rise and guard, Hedda's Own." She opened her eyes to see Gayle holding out a steaming cup of tea. Sarge collapsed into Cianan's cot – Dagonet lay snoring in Sarge's. Cianan had already gone outside. Maleta rose and took the tea, letting Gayle crawl under the still-warm covers.

  She pulled her boots on, armed herself and carried her tea out with her, cradling the cup for warmth. Cianan stood at the corner of the cabin, facing toward Soto. He glanced over at her as she approached.

  "Morning," he greeted her. "Walk the perimeter with me."

  She nodded and yawned. Taking a sip of the tea, she recognized the acidic bite of merc root, a powerful stimulant guaranteed to clear the cobwebs. She drank it down, grimacing in distaste as she walked with Cianan around the cabin. All seemed quiet and still.

  "I am glad for how this assignment turned out," he told her. "It is past time we talked, vertenya, without any interruptions."

  She eyed him. "About what?"

  "You know what."

  Tired of the backed-into-a-corner feeling, Maleta felt her temper flare. "Why do you push so?"

  He stopped and turned to her, moonlight and shadows etching the hard lines of his face. "Because we have a connection, you and I. I know you feel it. You spend every waking moment avoiding it, running away from it, or fighting it. A moment of closeness, like that night in the women's sanctuary or after my healing, but then you shove me away, like earlier today." His gaze burned into hers. "One moment I am a person, and the next a demon. Why?"

  Unable to hold his gaze, her own skittered away. Sweet Hedda, must he be so direct? "Your imagination runs away with you. We're allies for the Light, naught else."

  "But there is something more." He grasped her arm. "Elingrena, look at me."

  What did that mean ? Fear clogged her throat. If she looked at him, she'd be lost. "Let me go."

  "Nay. Not this time." Cianan brushed the hood back from her face.

  She flinched at his touch.

  "You believe I would hurt you?"

  No. And aye. How did things get so complicated? She looked into his eyes. The frown of concern there made her heart skip a beat. The underlying heat, the awareness, a man's desire for a woman, made her stomach roil. "Stop looking at me like that."

  "I cannot. You ask the impossible."

  Blood pounded in her ears. She took a deep breath of frosty air. "What do you see when you look at me?"

  His slow smile was both melting and heartrending. "I see a beautiful, brave and compassionate woman, committed to making her world a better place."

  Sweet Hedda, if only she was. Maleta shook her head. "You don't know me. That woman you speak of doesn't exist. She died a long time back."

  "When you look in the mirror, what do you see?"

  Tears burned her eyes. "What I am. Just a killer. Hedda's Own. When you view the future, what do you see?" She turned his question around on him.

  "You, with me." He cupped her cheek with his hand and stepped closer.

  Blind panic struck. She couldn't breathe, and slapped his arm away, yanking herself from his grip and spinning out of reach. "Don't touch me!"

  Cianan froze. An unspoken anguish crossed his face. "So that is the way of it. That explains much." He stepped back
and held out a hand. "Walk the perimeter with me, vertenya."

  She rubbed her arms as she moved forward to do another round. He strode aside her, silent as the night. Her thoughts were all jumbled with emotion. The sharpest, the most painful, was regret. Regret she could never be the woman he described. Were she anyone else, he'd be perfect. He at least deserved to know the truth. "Sunniva turned me over to her soldiers after she killed my parents and took Jovan."

  A muscle ticked in his jaw. "Sunniva could do that to another woman?" His voice turned low and deadly.

  "I was sixteen."

  He snarled something incomprehensible and took a deep breath. "It is a miracle you survived. You are an amazing woman, elingrena."

  She had to know. "What does that mean? Elingrena?"

  He hesitated. "It is a term of endearment. It translates as My Heart. My Own."

  She stumbled to a halt, appalled. "You speak of love ? You're mad!"

  "There is someone for each of us. I am for you."

  "But that's impossible!" she blurted. "You're years too late. My path is carved in stone. Find someone else."

  He moved around to stand afore her, tilted her chin up so her gaze locked with his. "I cannot. Even if I could, I do not want to. You are for me. You are strong and filled with Light. What you do, you do for others, as a protector, a true vertenya."

  The heat of his fingers burned her skin. She wanted to run, but couldn't move. She stood there, trembling, mesmerized by those eyes, nearly black in the shadows of the night. He would never hurt her physically, she knew that, but he would shatter her heart if she let him in. "But you deserve a whole woman, who can have a normal relationship and bear your children. I'm not that woman, not anymore. She died at Kunigonde six years ago."

  "There is more to being a mate than a housekeeper and a broodmare."

  She didn't know what to make of that, and frowned in confusion. Women could be set aside if they proved barren. "Don't you want sons to carry on your family name?"

  "What I want is an equal partner, with strength, courage and honesty." Cianan trailed his fingers down her cheek, down the side of her neck. "I have waited a lifetime to find you. You are a true miracle."