by Kim Loraine
Alex didn’t want to feel the spark of hope that ignited in his chest, but there it was; faint, yet burning nonetheless.
As the volume of their conversation grew, alarm bells rang in Alex’s head. He watched as Dean grabbed her with both hands and she cried out in pain. Rage filled him and he flew out the front door. Before he knew it, he’d pressed Dean up against the police car, strong-arming him while keeping Lauren back.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” he snarled.
Dean pushed back. “Get off me, Alex. This isn’t your business.”
“It is mine when you’re assaulting my tenant, Officer.”
“Okay, okay. No one was assaulting anyone, Alex. Dean and I are just working out a few things.” Lauren placed a gentle palm on Alex’s shoulder, adding fuel to that damn spark.
“You can work things out without him hurting you. And if you can’t, he doesn’t deserve your time.” Removing his arm, Alex stepped back. “Lauren, would you go inside? Dean and I need to talk, but I can’t do that if you’re here.”
“Alex—” she started.
“Please.” He hated the pathetic tone in his voice, but he couldn’t stand the idea of her being hurt.
“Okay.” Her reply was slow, grudging, but she must’ve seen something on his face that made her agree.
The anxiety in his chest loosened as she turned and walked toward the house. When Dean let out a frustrated breath, the anger took hold in Alex’s mind again.
“Look, I get it. You’re having trouble, but I saw the bruises on her arms a few weeks ago. You touch her again, I’ll call your buddies in blue and convince her to press charges. You hear me?”
Dean’s lips pressed into a tight line before he finally said, “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Want to bet? I see anything that looks questionable, you’ll be hearing from me.”
Staring daggers at him, Dean got back in the cruiser and drove off, leaving Alex with his heart pounding in his ears.
Grabbing the back of his neck, he massaged away a little of the tension as he paced the yard.
She was sitting on the porch, arms wrapped around her knees, and staring at him.
“Why did you do that?”
Tension raced through him. “A man should never hurt a woman, much less one he loves.”
“He’s just having a hard time. We were engaged . . . before.”
“No excuse.”
“I think I’ve been leading him on. I ended it a few weeks ago.”
“I don’t care if you were on your knees ready for him and changed your mind. You deserve better than that kind of treatment. Promise me you’ll never let him touch you like that again.”
He knew he was being irrationally intense, but he remembered the bruises he’d found on Roxie when they’d reunited after their brief break up. She’d only been out with that asshole twice, and he’d thought he could force her to do whatever he wanted. No way was Alex going to sit by and watch something like that happen to another woman.
“Okay. I promise.” Lauren put her small hand on his and he fought the urge to pull her into his arms. “Thank you, Alex.”
“You’re welcome.”
“You know, maybe you’re not really a butthole.”
“You still look like a librarian.”
She elbowed him and stood. “Never mind. I take it back.”
“Hey, come on now. I didn’t say I had a problem with librarians. Maybe I have a librarian fetish. Did you ever think of that?”
“Shut up.”
He laughed and stood as well, heading toward his door.
“Come over for dinner tomorrow?” she asked, her voice hopeful.
Disappointment clawed at him. “I can’t. I’m covering a shift tomorrow. How about the next day?”
“Sure.” Her grin was contagious, making him smile even though his stomach was in knots.
“See you then.”
Nodding, she waved and jogged around the house.
Fuck. If he wanted to stay away from her, he’d failed miserably.
Chapter 7
“It’s no big deal, he’s just coming for dinner.” Lauren wiped her sweaty palms on the skirt of her dress as she paced the small kitchen. “It’s not a big deal. Chill the heck out.”
Dinner was just about done cooking and the whole apartment was warm, filled with the scent of rich spices, making her stomach growl in anticipation. Taking a gulp of her beer, she closed her eyes and leaned against the counter. Why was she nervous? This wasn’t a date. It was just her way of showing him they could be friends.
She could hear his footfalls as he walked around upstairs, the sound both soothing and stressful. His steps upstairs meant he was present, but not here yet. Raking a hand through her hair, she moved from one end of her small apartment to the other, trying to distract herself from the butterflies churning in her stomach.
Grabbing her phone, she scrolled through her music library until she found the Sounds of Cedar bootleg Angela had slipped her. As the opening song started, she smiled and let out a breath. She’d be fine. There wasn’t any reason to be freaking out. So involved in her own head, the sharp rap on her door caught her by surprise and sent tingles through her body. Taking a calming breath, she walked the few short steps across the room.
She could see Alex through the peephole. A slight smile turning up one side of his mouth. Heat coiled low in her body. Why did he have to be so good looking? When she pulled the door open and his eyes met hers, she could see the hesitance hiding behind them.
“Hey.” She tried to sound natural, but was pretty sure she failed.
His lips quirked into a more confident smirk. “Hey.”
As he walked past her and headed inside, her heart stuttered when she caught sight of the bouquet of flowers he held behind his back.
“Flowers?”
A faint blush crept up his neck. “Uh, yeah. My mom told me I should never come empty handed when someone’s making me dinner.”
He shoved the plastic wrapped blooms at her, averting his gaze toward the kitchen. “Smells good.”
Pride filled her chest as she strode into the kitchen, bending down to pull a vase out from under the sink. When she cast a glance over her shoulder, a hot flush filled her cheeks. His eyes were locked on her rear, lust shining in their striking depths. Standing, she tried to ignore the thrumming of her pulse in her throat, and even more, the arousal which raced through her body and straight to her core.
“Th-Thanks. Um, I hope you like tamales. It’s one of the only dishes I know how to cook.”
Shrugging, he closed the distance between them and reached around her, toward the counter. “Never had them,” he breathed against her neck before pulling back with a beer in his hand.
As much as she tried to contain herself, her breath hitched at his proximity. “First time for everything.”
Motioning for him to sit at her small, round kitchen table, she turned her back, hoping to find a way to keep her attraction at bay.
“So, where did you learn to cook these?” His voice was confident, strong, and friendly, like he was truly trying to connect with her.
Still refusing to face him, she plated the food and took a long drink of her beer. “My abuela taught me. She grew up in a little town just south of the border of Texas and Mexico.”
“So, a family recipe. Those are the best kind.”
Unable to avoid it any longer, she settled the plates on the table and took her seat across from him.
His eyes went wide as he took in the heaping serving of hot food. “Damn, that looks amazing.”
“I hope so. Like I said, it’s all I can cook. I exist on a diet of toaster pastries, mac and cheese, and take out.”
Cocking an eyebrow, he surveyed her. “Hence the bike?”
“Hence? Did you just hence me?”
He laughed around a forkful of food. “I did.”
“What do you mean about the bike?”
“Well, Golden Beach isn’t exactly a biking community. Most people have cars. So, I figured if you eat nothing but junk, the bike must be how you keep yourself in shape. Either that, or you’re blessed with a kick-ass metabolism.”
Her cheeks flamed. “I like to be active.”
“So do I.”
Heart racing, she dropped her gaze from his mouth and focused on the meal. She kept silent as they ate, not knowing how to talk to him without betraying the feelings humming inside her body.
“How long have you been here?” he asked as he stood and took their empty plates to the sink.
“About a year.”
His shoulders were so broad. She couldn’t stop staring as he turned on the water and started scrubbing the dishes.
“You don’t have to do that,” she started.
Casting a glance over his shoulder, he said, “You cooked. I’ll clean. Sit. Have another beer.”
“You’re from here originally, right?” She worked to keep her tone light, desperate to know more about him.
“Yeah. My . . . my wife and I moved to Richmond about five years ago. After my little brother died.”
Her heart clenched. “I’m so sorry.”
He grabbed another beer and settled in his chair. “I took it really hard. Left the station, needed a new start.”
“Were you a firefighter in Richmond?”
Shaking his head, he spun the bottle back and forth between his extended fingers. “No. I got my teaching certification. I taught high school English.”
That shocked her. He was so gruff, short tempered, and angry. She didn’t see him as a teacher. “So, you shaped young minds for five years?”
“Poor kids.”
“No kidding.”
With a chuckle, he leaned back in his chair and took a swig from his bottle. She couldn’t keep from watching his throat move as he swallowed. What was it about this man that made even the most mundane actions incredibly sexy? Blinking hard, she tried to clear her mind and soothed her suddenly dry throat with a drink.
“So, what brought you here?”
Pursing his lips, he trained his gaze on the table. “My wife, Roxie, died. It’s complicated.”
She didn’t miss the fact that his fingers immediately went to the gold band encircling his left ring finger. A pang of sorrow hit her as she watched him worry the metal.
“Well, I came here because Dean wanted me to.”
“And you two broke up, so why did you stay?”
“I made friends, built a life. I like it here. It’s a lot different from Michigan.”
His eyebrows rose as he looked across the table. “Michigan? That’s a big move.”
“My family lives there. I was ready to move on.”
“And Dean swept you off your feet?”
Sadness for something she’d thought she wanted gripped her. “Kind of. I wanted an excuse to get away, he wanted me. I realized too late that he wasn’t the right guy for me.”
“I’m glad you realized it.” He stood, shrugging on his jacket and offering her a soft smile. “Thanks for dinner.”
As she followed him to the door, her heart fluttered with anticipation. Should she hug him? Her thoughts raced a mile a minute as she tried to work out the right move. His gaze settled on her mouth as she worked out something to say to keep him a little longer.
Then his lips were on hers and all thoughts went blank. The only thing she could process was the feel of his full, soft mouth against her own. His hand gripped the back of her neck as he pulled her closer, and pressed his hips against her body.
Oh, God. Her knees trembled, head spun, and when he pulled away and let out a shuddering breath, she was a heartbeat away from tugging him back to her bed and letting him ravish her.
“You kissed me.” It came out a soft whisper. Her eyes still felt heavy with the haze of arousal.
Backing away, he met the closed door with his back and stared at her with something akin to disgust on his face. “I . . . I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that,” he said through clenched teeth.
It felt as though a bucket of ice water had been poured over her. “What?”
“I’m not . . . This isn’t going to happen.” Anger filled his voice as he moved to open the door. “I think it’s best if we go back to how things were.”
“Alex, I don’t under—”
“Stop.” He held up a hand and backed away. “No more of . . . this.” Gesturing toward the kitchen, he grimaced. “I’ve got to go.”
He was out the door and stalking around the house before she could protest.
What the heck just happened?
~ ~ ~
“Damn.” Alex bit out the curse as he slammed his front door. What had he been doing? He couldn’t go around kissing Lauren. He shouldn’t want to kiss anyone. Breaths coming in harsh gasps, he walked through the house, trying to figure out how he could have gotten to this place. The only woman in his life had been Roxie. He’d never kissed another woman, never felt her body pressed against his, never wanted her so badly he lost control of his actions.
Until Lauren.
Pulling his phone from his pocket, he dialed Michael, hoping desperately his brother was home from work.
“Alex? What’s wrong?” Michael’s worry came through as a harsh rasp.
“Nothing. I just need to talk.”
“Talk?”
“Can you meet me somewhere? Maybe the Bar and Grill?”
“Uh, yeah. Hang on. I’ve got to check with Lena. Meg’s been cutting her first tooth and we’re both a little on edge. She might need me here to take a shift.”
As Alex listened, he heard the murmur of voices, the wail of a baby clearly in distress, followed by a heavy sigh.
“Can we do this over the phone? Lena has a shoot early in the morning and she’s got to get some sleep. Or, you could come here.”
Shaking his head, he let out a breath. “Nah, it’s okay. I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about it.”
Michael was silent for a moment, before he let out a low oath. “You sure?”
“Yeah. I’ve got some shit to work out, but I’ll be okay. Give Meg a kiss for me?”
“You got it, brother. Come by if you need to. You’re always welcome.”
After hanging up, he did something he hadn’t had the courage to do in almost a year. Opening his computer, he clicked on the file marked Do Not Open This. His breath caught at the sight of him and Roxie, dressed in a cheap suit and bargain wedding gown. Their bright smiles and hopeful faces broke open the healing ache in his chest.
He clicked through picture after picture, wishing he could contain the burn of resentment that shadowed each photo. So much of his life had been lived with her, but she’d chosen to give it all up.
And he’d been the cause.
Chapter 8
Rae,
Happy birthday. I feel like today is a kind of beginning for us. The road we took to each other had been easy until suddenly it wasn’t. We made the mistake of letting the hard moments stop us from being together. We gave up before we tried to do the work to fix things. Now that I have you back, I’ll never let that happen again. Being without you was harder than anything I’ve ever been through. I feel like we wasted that time when all we needed to do was talk to each other. I promise to always talk to you from now on. We don’t have to try to have a baby, we don’t have to be anything more than us. But, if you want children I’ll do whatever I can to give them to you.
The most important thing is that the
re is an US. You and me. Forever.
Always yours
Lauren held the letter close to her chest and let out a contented sigh. They’d made it back to each other. At least someone got to be happy. She hadn’t seen Alex in over a week since their amazing kiss and his abrupt departure. He’d even stopped coming to The Oak Tree. Surprisingly, that bothered her more than his avoidance of her at home. There was a surly firefighter-shaped void at the café, and the fact that she was upset about it frustrated her. Why would he kiss her if he didn’t want anything to do with her?
Her phone rang, breaking her out of the futile spiral of over-analysis.
“Mother,” she answered, trying to keep her tone positive.
“Are you ready to come home yet?”
Huffing out a breath, Lauren rolled her shoulders and stood up straighter, putting on a confident air even if she couldn’t be seen. “No, Mother. I’m staying here. I told you that last time we spoke.”
“Fine. You leave me no choice. Chassity will be there next week.”
“What? I’m thirty years old. I don’t need my little sister to come get me.”
“She’s not. She’ll be staying for a few weeks until you make the right choice. Your sister wants to see you. While we’re at it, I’m assuming you won’t be returning for the holidays?”
Lauren hadn’t even thought of her plans for Thanksgiving, let alone Christmas.
“It’s only the middle of October.”
“You know I need to plan ahead. Your father is taking part in so many functions this season. I need to know whether or not to add you to our seating charts. Although, Lord knows what you’ll show up wearing.”