Resolution (A Golden Beach Novel)

by Kim Loraine

  Typing back a response, she snapped a picture of herself sitting on the bed with a sexy pout.

  I’m lonely now. What am I supposed to do with myself?

  In two seconds flat, her phone rang.

  “Jesus, Lauren. Are you trying to send me out on calls tonight with a raging hard-on?”

  Letting go of her anxiety about her secret, she laughed. “You started it.”

  “What are you wearing? Your tits looked amazing in that picture.”

  She toyed with the hem of her nightgown. “Just an old nightie. It’s comfy and I don’t have anyone to break out the fancy lingerie for tonight.”

  “Damn right, you don’t. God, I’m going to be fantasizing about you all night now.”

  “Good. I don’t want you to forget about me while you’re over there saving lives.”

  His low chuckle rumbled over the phone. “Baby, I couldn’t forget you if I tried.”

  “Darn right.”

  The alarm sounded as she was about to lie back on the bed. “Fuck, Lauren. I’ve got to go. I love you.”

  “I love you, too. Be safe, Alex.”

  As the call ended, she found herself sliding her hands over her thighs and under the hem of her thin night-dress. If Alex was going to get her all hot and bothered and then have to hang up, she’d just take care of herself. The man had played a starring role in her sexual fantasies for quite some time. As she closed her eyes and focused on the memory of their weekend away, she let herself forget everything else but him.

  ~ ~ ~

  “Uncle Alex, can you take me to Disneyworld?” Mitchell’s small voice and big brown eyes shot straight through Alex’s chest. How could he say no to a sweet kid like this one?

  “Um, it’s a little far away. When did you want to go?”

  “Tomorrow.” The little boy held tight to his uncle’s hand as they walked down the beach, stopping every so often to collect driftwood for the bonfire they were having in honor of John’s birthday.

  “I don’t think I can take you tomorrow. But maybe we can plan it for this summer. I’ll talk to Grammy and Papa, okay?”

  Mitchell’s smile was wide. “Okay.” They continued their trek, turning back and heading to the house with arms full of small logs. “Why are we having a birthday party for someone who isn’t alive anymore?”

  A pang of longing went through him. The family never talked about John on the anniversary of his death, but celebrated his birth every year without batting an eye. “You know, I think it makes it easier to remember him. He loved celebrating his birthday. Every year we’d have a big party and he’d smile and laugh, and that made us all smile, too. You’re a lot like him. Every time you smile, so do I.”

  Mitchell plastered a huge toothy grin on his freckled face. “Like this?”

  Alex followed suit. “Exactly.”

  After dropping the wood on the pile, they headed inside where Lauren sat with Lena and his mother. She looked so at home there, engaged in easy conversation with the two women, so different from Roxie who’d never been comfortable around his mom. Catching Lauren’s eye, he waved and his heart leapt in his chest at the love radiating from her gaze. He watched her excuse herself and make a beeline for him.

  “Oh, my goodness, Alex. Why didn’t you tell me about everything your family has been through?”

  Wrapping her in his arms, he inhaled the delicious scent of her shampoo. “Sorry. It’s a little like a soap opera. I didn’t want to scare you away.”

  “Lena told me all about Grace and John, and then her finding his twin, Drew, in England after John died. And then there’s Mitchell. I was wondering where he fit in this mix. I didn’t know any of that and I feel like I should have.” She turned her gaze up to him. “Were you afraid I’d handle it wrong or your family wouldn’t like me or something?”

  Shaking his head, he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “No. The opposite, actually. I knew you’d come in here and avoid the topics like the plague. I thought it was more important for you to learn everything you needed to know by being with us. If my mama didn’t like you, you wouldn’t be here. She’d have run you off that day at the cafe when she realized I was in love with you. She knew even before I did.”

  “Sometimes, I think you’ve got someone feeding you these lines.”

  He couldn’t contain the smile, or the laugh that escaped him. “Why do you say that?”

  “It’s like you’ve got all of these amazing words stored up just waiting for a moment you can sweep me off my feet.”

  “Maybe I do. Maybe I spend all my free time planning ways to make sure you never want anyone but me.”

  A small grin turned up the corner of her mouth and he had to fight the urge to kiss those upturned lips. “You’ve already done that.”

  “Okay, break it up, you two.” Alex’s dad’s voice boomed throughout the room. “Your mama’s got the cupcakes Lena made, we’re lighting the fire outside, and the sun’s going down. It’s almost show time.”

  Instead of releasing her, Alex pulled Lauren tighter against his body. Her answering giggle sent a wave of need through him. Lowering his mouth to her ear, he whispered, “I can’t wait to get you home so I can spend the rest of the night inside you.”

  She let out a soft moan before shimmying out of the cage of his arms. The bright pink of her cheeks brought out a sense of pride in him. He knew she’d be thinking of what he’d said for the rest of the evening.

  Taking his hand, she followed Lena and Michael out the back door. The sinking sun behind them bathed the sky in warm oranges, pinks, and reds. His mom handed everyone a cupcake and the family stood around the fire, watching for her cue.

  With a gentle nod of her head, she smiled and kissed the tips of her fingers before pressing them over her heart. “Happy birthday, Johnny.”

  Lauren let out a soft breath, calling his attention from his mom to her. Tear tracks stained her cheeks and her lower lip trembled as she clearly fought for control of her emotions. With his free hand, he wiped the moisture away, brushing her lips with his thumb. Her large, dark eyes found his, and as if his heart wasn’t already hers, she claimed it all over again.

  “Sorry. I didn’t think this would get to me.” Her whispered words sent an ache through him.

  “Come on, let’s sit and eat our cupcakes. Then I’m taking you on a walk down the beach.”

  Nodding, she followed his lead. As he watched, she peeled the paper from the bottom of her dessert with determination. Then, she gripped the top just under the line of frosting and pulled the cupcake apart.

  “What are you doing? That’s not how you eat a cupcake.”

  With a grin, she flipped the top half upside down and sandwiched the icing between the halves of cake. “This is the only way to enjoy a cupcake.”

  He heard Lena laugh from behind him. “She’s totally right. It’s not pretty, but it’s delicious. Every bite gets you cake and frosting.”

  Watching his dad shrug and do the same with his treat, followed by his mom and Mitchell, Alex let out a soft laugh. “Fine, fine. I’ll try it.”

  As he took a bite, he had to admit she was right. He’d never eat a cupcake the same way again.

  Brushing the cake crumbs from his fingers, he pulled Lauren out of her chair and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Okay, let’s go for that walk now.”

  With bright eyes, she smiled and nodded. Kicking off their shoes, they let the cold sand tickle their toes as they stayed clear of the frigid water.

  Her voice was soft, hesitant as she began to speak. “So . . . I was thinking about the moving in thing—”

  “It’s fine, we’ve already talked about this.”

  Giving him a light shove, she laughed. “Would you let me talk?”

  His heart lightened at the smile
in her voice and on her face. “Sorry, yes, please continue.”

  “Can we revisit it after Christmas? I’ve been thinking about you and me, and it’s not like we’re getting married or anything. It’s the next step. I think I want to take it, but I’m a planner. I like to know what’s going to happen and when. Spur of the moment is hard for me.”

  He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Trying to contain his excitement, he stared down at her. “Yeah.” He had to clear the lump in his throat before he could continue speaking. “That’s . . . that sounds fucking fantastic.”

  Leaning in close, she rested her cheek on his chest. “I’m so glad you happened to me, Alex.”

  Running his fingers through her hair, he stared across the darkening ocean and breathed in a sigh of contentment. She’d taken him away from everything that had broken him. “Me, too.”

  Chapter 22

  Days turned to weeks as Lauren continued to try and come up with some way she could tell Alex about the letters. Every time the moment seemed right, a crushing weight settled on her chest, panic set in, and she’d change the subject. She couldn’t risk losing him.

  Her shoulders slumped as she sat at her desk. Maybe she should pretend like she’d never read them, delete her manuscript, and write something new, just like Chassity had suggested. The stress had her stomach turning and her body aching. All she wanted to do was close her eyes and sleep when she thought of telling him. That bad feeling had to mean something, didn’t it?

  Staring at the stack of papers on her desk, she let out a sigh of longing as she ran her fingers over the first page. She’d worked so hard writing this beautiful book. And now it was going to be tossed in the garbage. But, Alex was worth it. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt him unnecessarily.

  The alarm dinged on her phone as she pulled on her coat, causing her to glance down at the screen. She was going to be late for her appointment if she didn’t leave now.

  As she pulled her bike into the parking lot at her doctor’s office, excitement ran through her. Knowing the step she was taking was huge, she worked to tamp down her nerves. She knew Alex needed a gesture from her, something to show him that things were moving forward as he waited for them to revisit the topic of moving in. Now that she’d come to terms with his connection to the letters, she was ready to trust him enough to put away the condoms. Getting on the pill was her way of telling him she wasn’t going anywhere. Then she could make the leap and move in with him.

  “Miss Garcia?” The receptionist assessed her with a stern glance.

  “Yes, that’s me. Sorry I’m late.”

  “It’s fine.” The woman handed her a clipboard with some forms. “Fill these out, then they’ll call you back.”

  After filling out the insurance forms, Lauren handed the papers back over the tall desk and settled herself in one of the uncomfortable chairs. Her phone buzzed in her purse and when she pulled it free and saw Alex’s face on the screen a smile touched her lips.

  Finger hovering over the phone to answer, she stopped when she heard her name. A nurse stood in the doorway, smiling gently as she gestured for Lauren to follow her.

  After the height and weight check was over, she provided a urine sample and dressed in the paper gown they provided. It had been two years since her last visit to the doctor, primarily because she hated this. Doctor’s offices always smelled weird, were too cold, and the crinkle of the paper-covered table under her bare butt made her cringe.

  A soft knock on the door sent relief through her. Almost finished. She’d have her exam, get her prescription, and be done until next year.

  “Hi, Lauren. It’s good to see you again.” The doctor stood before her, worry in her eyes but a smile on her face.

  “Hi. I know I’m overdue for an exam.”

  Nodding, the doctor pulled a rolling stool across the room and sat. “So, your chart says you’re here for an exam and birth control.”

  “Yeah. It’s time. I’m not a huge fan of the extra hormones, but—”

  “Lauren, I can’t put you on birth control.”

  That made her heart jump. “What? Why?”

  “You’re pregnant.”

  “No, I’m not. I had my period just a few weeks ago.”

  Doctor Christen’s frown deepened. “Your urine test was positive for pregnancy. Are you sure you had a period and not just some light spotting?”

  “Yeah. I mean, maybe it was a little shorter than normal. I can’t be pregnant.”

  She thought back weeks, months, to that day when Alex had told her he loved her. They hadn’t used a condom. He hadn’t pulled out. But she’d had a period twice since then.

  “Well, the only way we can really tell is to do an ultrasound. Can you lie back and relax for me? We’ll get a look and see what’s going on.”

  Panic grew in her stomach as she watched the screen and there, plain as day, was a tiny baby. A baby, with arms and legs and a wildly thrumming heart.

  “You’re definitely pregnant.” After measuring the baby from head to rump, Doctor Christen smiled and the sound of something printing filled the room. “I’d say you’re about twelve weeks along. Baby looks fantastic. It’s got a strong heartbeat.” Reaching out, she gripped Lauren’s hand and helped her to a sitting position.

  “But . . . how can that happen? I told you. I had my period. Twice.”

  Shaking her head, the doctor handed Lauren a printed picture of the ultrasound. “It wasn’t technically a period. Some women bleed intermittently during their pregnancies around the same time their menstrual cycle should start. What I can tell you is, that’s a baby. You’re pregnant. Congratulations, I’m sure Dean will be over the moon.”

  A dark cloud descended over the conversation. “Dean and I aren’t together anymore.”

  “Oh. I hadn’t heard. I’m sorry, Lauren.”

  “It’s fine.” Placing a palm over her abdomen, she stared at the picture still on the screen. “A baby. Wow.”

  “This scan puts your due date at July fifteenth.”

  Her head spun. She’d be a mother this summer. What was Alex going to say? Terror mixed with hope as she ran through all of the possible reactions he might have. Visions of holding their baby in her arms, of bedtime stories and first steps, filled her head. She searched her own heart and knew that no matter what, she was going to make this work. Everything had changed.

  ~ ~ ~

  Alex shucked off his bunker gear after returning from another call. Today’s shift had been full of false alarms, lonely people wanting someone to talk to, and fender benders. Though not taxing, he really wanted to talk to Lauren. She’d ignored his calls all day yesterday, which was unusual. Since their trip over Thanksgiving, things between them had grown stronger and more solid. With every day that passed, he fell deeper and knew that it was only a matter of time before he started talking about marriage.

  “Alex, what the fuck?” Sully yelled over the rumble of the new Ladder Truck’s engine as he tried to pull it into the garage bay. Clearing his head, Alex stepped out of the path of the vehicle, waving at his friend in apology.

  After killing the engine, Sully hopped down from the driver’s seat and beamed. “I love this thing. I’ve been wanting to get a Ladder in here for years.”

  “It’s pretty awesome. We’re moving up in the world.”

  Sully chuckled. “Something like that. How’s tricks over in your little world lately? I haven’t seen much of you outside of the station.”

  Alex’s chest lit up with a warmth he was sure showed on his face. “It’s fucking amazing. I feel like a different person.”

  “You seem like a different person, man.” Putting his hand on Alex’s shoulder, he squeezed. “Glad to see it. You deserve to be happy.”

  As they walked through the garage and into the hall
, the alarm blared, turning them on their heels.

  “Engine. Ladder. Medic. Structure fire.”

  “Well, shit,” Sully grumbled, glancing at the clock which showed they only had thirty minutes until relief showed up and they could punch out for the day. “Looks like we’re actually going to see some action this shift.”

  As the rest of the crew hurried into their gear, Alex slid back into his and jumped up to the driver’s seat of Engine 31. Flipping down the visor, he pressed his fingers to the photo of Lauren he stashed there every shift and said a prayer before pulling onto the road. Flipping on the siren, he waited for direction from Donovan, his newly appointed Lieutenant.

  “Headed out to old Branscome farm. Looks like a barn fire.”

  Nodding, he turned toward the farm, heart pounding. “Isn’t that the same place we lost John?”

  With a grim look on his face, Donovan nodded. “Fuck. I can’t believe there’s another fire out there.”

  Black smoke filled the air as they approached, but this wasn’t some abandoned barn on Branscome’s property. This fire was on the working dairy farm portion of their land. “Goddammit. There are fucking cows running around everywhere.” Alex watched as the animals scattered, their eyes wide and rolling in fear.

  “How are we going to work around this?” Sully asked as he pulled a hose from the truck.

  “Just do your best. Gray, get with Sully and get in there. Search for anyone trapped inside.” Donovan was all business, focused on the job.

  They made quick work of the fire as Gray and Sully pulled one person from the blaze. With the building still smoldering, Battalion Chief Roman pulled up, striding across the scene with a purposeful expression on his stern face. “What a way to start my shift. Damn, did you get everyone out?”

  Donovan walked along with the chief, going over the incident as the rest of the crew took care of the cleanup. After climbing back into the rig, Alex waited for his friend and the rest of the crew to be ready to go.