by Justine Dell
“Hey.” Lance gave her shoulders a shake. “You okay?”
She cleared the haze and blinked. “Yeah, sure. I’m sorry. It’s been an exhilarating day, to say the least.”
“I understand.” He dipped his head and kissed her. Softy. Slowly. Carefully. When he drew away, he looked just as puzzled as she probably did. “We’ll go wait outside. You can tell me more about Dorothy at dinner, okay?”
“Sure, I’ll just be minute.”
Samantha loosened up a little during dinner, but Lance noticed her uneasiness and the way her eyes didn’t quite meet his. It unsettled him. She’d talked and laughed with Jax, and hugged him and kissed him several times; that at least made Lance feel better. But he would’ve been blind not to notice the way she tensed when he gripped her hand or brushed her arm.
Something had her on edge, and he wanted to make it go away. The only time she’d actually smiled at him was when she’d told him the good news about Dorothy coming home in less than a week. It had broken the ice that had come over her since Jax had mentioned everyone needed a mate.
As they walked into the park, with Samantha and Jax several steps ahead, he remembered the look of panic on Samantha’s face. It was as though she’d caught herself in a nightmare. She obviously still had some things to work through. Lance didn’t know how much time he’d have left with her, but he was certain he was going to show her how much she meant to him, with words or without. He figured it would be the latter.
“Dad!” Jax spun around and looked at Lance. “Me and Samantha are going to play on the monkey bars.” Lance nodded, took a seat, and watched the two people he loved.
He wondered if Samantha would be ready to hear such words? No. It dug at his gut to know the woman he’d wanted for so long, the one he still wanted, wouldn’t want to hear how he actually felt. She’d been broken by so many things. Her ex-husbands. Her fast-paced life. Her stress and guilt. Her own anger. He wanted to be the one to help her put the pieces together and wanted to be the piece that completed her.
Samantha and Jax giggled as they climbed the bars. Jax did flips and twists, while Samantha tried and failed. Lance laughed at their attempts. Every once in a while Samantha would stop, look at her hands and rub them on her pants. Then she would tickle Jax. She looked natural, so perfect playing with him. It was so easy for her to open up to him and treat him as though she’d loved him for years.
Lance thought of the little girl Samantha had spoken about, the one she’d mothered and taken care of who had been taken from her in the divorce. He hated the man who put Samantha through that pain. Losing a child would be heart-wrenching and no doubt another reason Samantha was pulling away from him. He wouldn’t let her push him any further. The evening had stretched him to his limits already. Samantha would have to work out her issues. She’d promised him a chance, and he was going to make sure he received a fair one.
He rose and walked over to Samantha and Jax where they were playing tic-tac-toe in the sand beneath the monkey bars.
“You’re good at this,” Samantha said as she erased the game and drew in a new one. She wiped her hands on her jeans again.
“He catches on quick. Like his dad.” Lance bent down at Jax’s side and patted his shoulder. When Samantha’s eyes met his, the humor and playfulness disappeared. Lance managed a thin smile.
“Dad, I’ve beat Samantha five times.”
“I know. I’ve been watching you.”
“Wanna play?” Jax handed Lance a stick.
“One game, then we’ve got to run. It’s going to be dark soon and you need a bath.”
Jax’s face contorted. “Dad!”
Lance chuckled. “Don’t Dad, me. Boys need baths.”
“Yuck.”
When Samantha laughed, Lance’s breath whooshed out of his lungs. She had the aura of an angel and didn’t even know it. When he looked at her, she cast her eyes away.
“Come on,” he said to Jax. “We’ll play another day. I’ll beat you then.”
“No you won’t. I’m good.”
“Not as good as me.” Lance got to his feet and pulled Jax up. Jax dusted the sand off his jeans. Lance held his hand out for Samantha, who hesitated briefly before taking hold. He drew her up and toward him. Her hand splayed out across his chest, keeping distance between them. He looked at her hand, then her. “You can’t hide from me forever.”
Her eyebrows rose. “I’m not—”
“Later,” he said. He turned, Jax at his side, and walked to his truck.
The ride back to Samantha’s was quiet. Once there, Samantha slid out of the seat, said her goodbyes, and rushed into the house. Lance shook his head in disappointment as he pulled out of the driveway. He would make her see it was worth a try, that they were worth a try. He didn’t know what she was hiding from, but he was going to find out.
“Dad!” Jax ran out of the bathroom, clad in his dino-jammies, T-Rex in hand. “I forgot his mate! She’s at Samantha’s.”
Lance set down his coffee and unfolded himself from the kitchen stool. “It’s okay, we can get it tomorrow.”
“No! He needs his mate. He can’t sleep without her.”
Lance rubbed his face, a headache beginning behind his eyes. “He’ll be fine for one night, Jax. Put him with the other ones.”
“Dad!”
“Don’t argue. It’s nine o’clock—your bedtime. It’s too late tonight. We’ll go over first thing in the morning.”
Jax’s expression sank into a frown. “Promise?”
“Promise.” Lance walked over and hugged him. “I love you.”
After tucking Jax in and convincing him that Mrs. T-Rex would be fine for the night, Lance went back into the kitchen to finish his coffee and clear his head.
Samantha sat in front of the blank screen of her laptop, her fingers aching to type. She groaned. Why was finishing this story so difficult? Why couldn’t she put together the words she needed to write? What was so hard about getting her hero and heroine together for that happily-ever-after? She blew out a rough breath. Maybe she should start writing women’s fiction; then she wouldn’t have to worry about the happily-ever-after. She could leave her heroine in a state of semi-happiness, wanting what was just out of reach, needing something more than she could give, understanding that things don’t always work out the way they should.
That sounded like her life, which made her think of Lance. She hated the gloomy look on Lance’s face when she’d hurried out of the truck and into her house, and it hurt to know that she’d put that expression there. She was stupid and naïve. After Jax had mentioned a mate, she’d frozen up like a woolly mammoth during the ice age. Lance wasn’t looking for a mate. Was he? And she certainly wasn’t looking for one. A good time, sure, but not a mate. Ryan had soured her on that for life.
And then there was Jax. He was about the same age as Ava and almost as important to Samantha. What if Jax got caught up in Lance and her relationship? What if she had to break Jax’s heart? Samantha sighed. She already knew her own heart was going to break, and she just hoped she didn’t hurt anyone else in the process.
The fact that Jax thought everyone needed a mate choked her up, making her rethink her priorities. If Jax thought his dad needed someone to be with, she wasn’t the best candidate. But she hadn’t known how say that to Lance, so she’d focused on Jax instead during dinner and the park. It helped settle her jangling nerves and loosened the tightness gripping her chest every time she looked at Lance.
She was fool, and a fool staring at a blank computer screen to boot. Her creative juices had stopped flowing—actually, they hadn’t flowed since that day Jenny left. With Lance deep in her thoughts, she couldn’t focus, let alone write.
She wanted bang her hollow head against the wall and for the yucky, churning feeling in her gut go away. The only way past this was to talk to Lance. With another sigh, she pushed the laptop off her legs and stretched out across the couch. She needed to figure out how to do something about this mess
without making it worse.
“Ouch!” A sharp object stabbed her leg. Jax’s T-Rex sat comfortably on her couch cushion and she smiled. He probably missed it. She picked it up and glanced at the clock; it was a little after eleven. Were they still awake? It wouldn’t hurt to call. If anything, it would give her reason to apologize to Lance.
Lance had been staring out the window so long that his coffee had gone cold. He dumped it into the sink. He wasn’t tired, but was considering dragging himself up to bed for a restless night when the phone rang.
“Hello?”
“Lance?”
The throbbing behind his eyes stopped. “Yes, Sam? Is everything okay?”
“Oh, yeah, it’s kind of late. I…I have Jax’s T-Rex.”
Lance breathed a sigh of relief. “I know. Took me forever to get him to go to sleep without it.”
“Oh, well, why didn’t you call? You could’ve come and gotten it.”
“After dinner and the park, I didn’t know if you wanted to see me.”
“Can I come over?”
That snapped his eyes open. There was an innocent tone to her voice, a vulnerability he hadn’t heard before. “You sure?”
“Yes.”
He gave her the address and hung up, baffled. The T-Rex could’ve waited until morning, but she’d been almost breathless on the line. She had something to say. That was fine; he had something to say himself.
He paced the living room until she arrived, and when she knocked, he took a deep breath and walked to the door. Opening it, he inhaled sharply. Her tormented expression didn’t conceal her beauty. Her hair was tied back as usual, and he wanted to tug out the ponytail and feel the silkiness of her locks between his fingers.
He settled for: “Hey.”
Samantha held out the T-Rex like a peace offering. When he reached out and took it, their fingers met. Hers were soft, which put him in mind of what her body felt like molded beneath his. Hot. Seeking. Wanting. He shook the memory from his mind to cease the growing erection between his thighs.
“Do you want to come in?” he asked.
“Yes, thank you.”
She stepped past him, her sweet scent drifting behind. He’d do anything to wipe the sadness from her face.
She spun around once inside the door, closing the distance between them and pressing her lips to his. After the initial shock, he savored, then plunged, ravishing her mouth. One hand gripped the top of her jeans while the other dove into her ponytail, breaking the elastic. Her hair spilled between his fingers. She moaned against his lips.
All his questions evaporated. All thoughts disappeared as he got lost in her. She wanted to give; he wanted to take. Her legs wound around him like a snake, and her body pressed into his. Her hands gripped his shoulders tightly, and when he opened his eyes, he saw the moisture pooling in hers.
Reality came crashing back. He wouldn’t use her. He needed to know what was wrong before going one step further.
“Samantha,” he breathed as he slowed the kiss. She froze in his arms. “I need you to talk to me.”
Her grip loosened and fell away. She took a step back, keeping her attention focused on the floor. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”
His expression hardened. “Don’t apologize.”
She ran a shaking hand through her hair.
“Talk to me,” he repeated.
She tilted her head up to look at him. The moisture had spilled over and cascaded down her cheeks. He reached out, wiped away a tear and cupped her face. She closed her eyes and smiled.
“I’m sorry for my behavior at dinner. I didn’t mean to be rude or disconnected. I was…”
“Thinking about a mate?”
Her smiled wavered, and he dropped his hand.
“How did you know?” she asked.
“You’re easier to read than you think. I knew from the moment Jax asked you.”
“Oh.”
He leaned toward her. “Listen, I get it. You don’t want to think about love, marriage, a litter of kids, and house with a white fence. Jax caught you off guard. You thought maybe I thought what he thought. It scared you.”
“Yes.”
“You don’t want to think past this right now. That’s fine. I can deal with that. But you have to give us a chance. You have to let your guard down. You have to let me in.” He moved closer, took her hand and caressed it. “You have to talk to me. Don’t think about tomorrow. Just worry about today.”
“I’m sorry. I want to be fair to you, me, and Jax. I can’t help but think about tomorrow, or next week. Or next month.”
“Don’t—”
“I’m trying. I will try. For us. Because right now, I want to be with you. It’s all I can think about, all I can feel.”
“Then feel, Samantha.” He brushed his fingers across her lips. “Just feel.”
His lips closed over hers. She opened for him, and he took. He grabbed her hips, hoisted her up, and continued to take as he walked toward his room. She moaned and sighed, taking his breath away with each movement. By the time he took the twelve steps to his room, his control had snapped.
She wanted to feel, and he would show her. Once inside the room he turned her around and ravaged her neck with his lips before jerking her T-shirt over her head and biting down on her shoulder. She whimpered and stilled. “But, Jax—”
“Has been in bed for hours,” he rasped. “And he’s a deep sleeper.”
His arms came around her, gripped her waist from behind and held her steady, tracing kisses along her back. He licked. Bit. Cherished the subtle curves. Trailing lower, he reached around and unsnapped the button from its mooring, sliding the jeans off her perfect hips and down her sleek legs. He suppressed a groan when he caught a glimpse of her rear. She wore a thin, black thong.
The erection tightening his pants grew. She stepped out of the jeans and twisted around. Trailing his fingers up her body, he made his way up her front, kissing and nipping at the exposed skin. Her legs trembled.
He took her hands, pulled her down on the carpet, and engulfed himself in her body. In her taste. Her touch. Within seconds she was panting beneath him, clawing at the floor, pulling him into her. He wanted all of her.
“Just feel, Samantha. Feel.” His mouth found the sweet spot between her thighs and he was completely enchanted. He ripped off her thin panties and devoured.
She writhed beneath him, her body twisting as his tongue flicked over her most intimate part. She cried out and tensed around him as he drove her higher, again and again. As his mouth ravished, his hands clasped and massaged the sweat-slicked planes of her body.
Another spasm rocketed through her, making her cry out for him. It was maddening. Unable to take any more, he sheathed himself in latex, flipped her over in one smooth move, and drove into her from behind.
“Oh God!”
He cursed silently and thanked all things holy as her wetness wrapped around him. All he could think, see, and breathe was her.
He held her hips and took long, fast strokes. She moaned his name over and over. He bent and kissed her neck taking in her scent, her taste. Everything.
Heart pounding, his muscles bunched and clenched with each movement. A sudden climax made her body shake, arms finally buckling. With one final thrust, he was lost in rapture. His brain was muddy, his muscles like jelly. Collapsing, he slid to the side and collected her in his arms. His heart flipped over in his chest, laid itself out, and took her in. Forever.
Those three little words were on the tip of his tongue, but he swallowed them. He wanted so much to tell her how he felt. What he really wanted. Who he needed.
Instead, he tugged her closer, kissed her softly, and listened to her heartbeat as she faded off to sleep.
Chapter Twenty
“Never too old, never too bad, never too late, never too sick
to start from scratch once again.”
~Bikram Choudhury
WOW. THAT WAS ALL SAMANTHA could think when s
he awoke the next morning. Lance’s arms were tucked tightly around her, his breath tickling the back of her neck. What was it about him that made her feel content and full of life?
She eased out of his arms and sat on the edge of the bed to look at him. The morning sun peeked in through the curtains, washing over the chiseled features of his face. She felt that familiar—and now painful—twinge in her chest.
He could have all of her in the blink of an eye if he wanted. She sighed and rose, careful not to wake him.
She didn’t want to leave his side, but she didn’t want Jax to catch them either. Pulling on her pants and top she slipped from the room, embarrassed and nervous. As quietly as possible, she padded to the front door. She’d call him later and explain her feelings about Jax finding them together. They hadn’t had the chance to work out that detail.
She was almost out the door when Jax’s raspy voice startled her.
“Samantha?”
She froze and slowly turned. Jax was standing a few feet away, hair rumpled, sleep still evident in his eyes.
“Yes?”
“What are you doing here?”
A knot in the back of her throat almost choked her. “I brought back your T-Rex.”
His eyes lit up. “You did?” He bounced toward her and tangled his arms around her. “Thanks!”
Samantha drew in a shallow breath. “You’re welcome.”
“You wanna stay for breakfast?” he asked.
“Um—”
“I think that’s a wonderful idea, Jax,” Lance’s deep voice rumbled from the hallway.
Samantha glanced up and saw him standing in the doorway, hair messy and clad in nothing but jeans. His eyes darted to her hand on the door handle, then back to her face.
She let her hand fall away from the door. “I’d love to, Jax.”
“Great!” He turned to Lance. “Can we have pan-e-cakes?”
“Didn’t you have those yesterday?”
“Yes, but I like them.”
“Okay, fair enough. Go wash up.”
“Yeah!” Jax ran up the stairs.