by ROD HARLEY
“Hello.”
“Toya, what’s up?”
“Kalem, what are you doing up so early?” I exhaled.
“I’m feeling a little restless. Yesterday was a long hard one and everything just stressed me out.” Toya didn’t respond. She had to be curious about what happened yesterday to get me stressing. “What are you doing calling me at four forty-five in the morning? Is everything okay?” Toya exhaled. Could the status of our relationship be having a negative impact on Toya as well? Maybe I wasn’t the only one stressing out about it.
“I couldn’t sleep. I thought maybe we could talk.”
“I think we should,” I agreed. There was a seemingly endless silence between us. I finally broke it. “We need to talk to each other in person.”
“When?”
“What do you have planned for today?” Toya hesitated as if sorting through her agenda in her mind.
“I don’t have anything planned, let’s get together later.”
“Where do you want to meet?”
“I’ll just come by your place if that’s okay.”
“That’ll work.”
“Say around five or so?”
“I’ll be there,” I answered. Again there was dead air between us. “Well I’ll just talk to you later then.”
“Alright, see you later,” Toya said and hung up. I held the phone in my hand for a few seconds staring at the number pad trying to make sense of Toya’s sudden willingness to talk. I had zero interest in the rationale behind her change of heart. There were things I wanted to say to her. Things that had been consuming my thoughts, hanging around my neck like a noose on a third world despot sentenced to hang for some godforsaken crime against humanity. So as far as I was concerned her motivation was irrelevant. I was just thankful for an opportunity to confess my thoughts and feelings about her and me.
I walked over to the bar and put the phone back on the base. I was heading back into the living room when the door to the guest bedroom opened and Simone stepped into the hallway. She quickly waved at me and then dashed into the bathroom. I continued over to the couch and sat down stretching my feet out on the coffee table.
I guess Simone was embarrassed by the events of last night, and early this morning. She shouldn’t be; there’s nothing wrong with a little self-stimulation every now and then. Besides after what I had done in the bathroom I was in no position to make any judgments about masturbation. I shook my head disgusted at the memory. I grabbed the remote from the table and turned on the television. Flipping through the channels I quickly found ESPN and settled in on Sportscenter.
Simone came out of the bathroom about ten minutes later. I turned and glanced down the hall just in time to see her dash back across the hall into the bedroom. This time I found it kind of humorous. If she only knew. I turned my attention back to ESPN.
I’d dozed off in front of the television and when I awoke it was almost eleven-thirty. Raoul and Vanessa were in the kitchen cooking breakfast. I got up and walked down the hallway towards the bathroom. Simone was bending over the sink brushing her teeth. She smiled at me showing a mouth full of toothpaste and saliva, before returning to the sink and continuing with her brushing.
I stepped into the bathroom, edged around Simone careful not to brush against her protruding butt, and slid open the closet on the back wall. I grabbed a towel and washcloth from the closet. I also picked out a toothbrush from the box on the floor where Raoul kept them. He had a box of fifty or so toothbrushes he had gotten from some dentist he used to mess with. I opened the plastic covering and popped the toothbrush in my mouth. Simone scooted over and waved me over to the sink, gesturing with a jerk of her head. She took the brush out of her mouth and spit a gobbet of white goo into the running water.
“You can get in here next to me,” she said before cupping her hands and sucking up a handful of water. I moved over to the sink and grabbed the tube of toothpaste. Simone spit into the sink again.
“What were you doing sleeping on the couch?” I squeezed some toothpaste onto my brush.
“I was up early checking out ESPN, fell asleep I guess.” Simone laughed.
“Oh, I was afraid I might have scared you off. It got kind of freaky last night.” She gave me an uncertain smile as if she was unsure if I would respond negatively. I smiled at her.
“Well. There isn’t anything wrong with letting the freak in you loose every now and then.” Simone’s smile lost its tension. She reached over and grabbed her towel off of the side of the sink and dried the water around her mouth. I stuck my toothbrush in my mouth and started brushing away. She pinched me on my butt before turning and walking across the hall into the bedroom.
After I finished brushing my teeth I took a hot shower. I had to put on the same clothes I had worn the night before but whatever. I planned to head straight home after leaving Raoul’s anyway. Hopefully I wouldn’t run into anyone who saw me out last night. I opened the medicine cabinet and grabbed the can of Secret. I sprayed a little under both armpits, all the while thinking: what kind of brother uses Secret. I knew Raoul didn’t. Probably belonged to some chick he had up in here.
Raoul was funny like that. He didn’t allow any of his female guests to use the master bathroom instead relegating them to one of the two guest baths. It was his way of keeping them out of his bathroom and preventing them from going through his stuff. I could feel him on that tip; a woman will go through your medicine cabinet with the quickness.
I remember one time in college this chick went through my medicine cabinet and found a tube of Tinactin. She read it and found out it was for jock itch. I guess she didn’t know what jock itch was because she came out of the bathroom acting like I had the plague. I didn’t find out why our date which had been moving along nicely up until the point she took the bathroom break, ended abruptly about ten minutes later, until I ran into her a couple of years later.
She told me that she’d started dating some dude from the basketball team and told him the story. After he cramped up laughing at her for about fifteen minutes, he explained to her that jock itch was basically athlete’s foot of the crotch. He told her it wasn’t contagious and that any guy who participates in sports, or other activities where heavy sweating was involved would probably experience it a couple of times during his playing days. Then he walked into his bathroom and brought back the half-empty tube of Tinactin he kept for his itchy, sweaty days. I got a good laugh thinking about that story.
I put the can of deodorant back into the medicine cabinet and headed back down the hall to the kitchen. The smell of bacon permeated the kitchen and dining area. I walked over to the dining room table and sat down. Simone came out of the room and sat at the bar in front of me. Raoul looked over his shoulder at me. A couple of minutes later he was sitting next to me at the table, staring at me as if he was trying to read my thoughts. It was obvious he wanted the low down on last night’s activities. Simone and Vanessa were whispering to each other about God knows what. Probably talking about the same thing Raoul wanted to talk to me about. He stood up and headed towards the living room.
“Yo, dog, let me holla at you for a sec.” I knew that it was coming. I got up and walked into the living room. Raoul kept on moving through the living room to the sliding glass door that led into the back yard. I followed him out into the afternoon air. He walked over to his back gate and leaned his forearms on the top rail. I walked up next to him and leaned my back against the gate. Raoul looked over at me grinning.
“So, nigga, what happened?” I shook my head nonchalantly and answered.
“Not a damn thing.” Raoul looked at me like I was crazy.
“Yeah right. Quit playing, dog, give me some details,” I shrugged.
“I told you, fool, nothing happened.” Raoul continued staring at me like he was waiting for me to confirm that I was joking. I kept a straight face.
“Man, I know you didn’t lay up with that fine ass woman all night and didn’t do shit. I know you ain’t go out
like that.” What was I going to do, tell him that Simone wanted to have sex with me but that I decided not to because of Toya? Was I going to tell him that I got her off and then went into the bathroom and jacked off to the sounds of him and Vanessa fucking in the living room? Hell no! As far as I was concerned, nothing happened.
“I was tired, dog. We talked for a while and before I knew it I was fast asleep.” Raoul eyed me suspiciously. I don’t think he was buying my bullshit story. I kept my gaze straight ahead over into his neighbor’s backyard. Raoul was staring at me so hard it felt as if his eyes were burning a hole through the side of my face. Finally he shook his head and looked away. I chuckled. The reaction I was getting from Raoul was amusing. You would have thought that he was the one who turned down sex last night. I turned around and leaned on the gate facing the same direction as Raoul.
As Raoul and I stood there staring out over the landscape, I heard his sliding glass door open, then slide shut. We turned around to Vanessa and Simone walking towards us. Vanessa had this funny smirk on her face. Simone’s look was more one of guilt. I figured they had been having a conversation similar to the one Raoul and I had been engaged in.
“What’s up ladies?” I greeted as Vanessa walked over and slid under Raoul’s arm. I looked over at Simone.
“We’re getting ready to leave,” she said approaching.
“Alright,” I returned. I tried to behave as casual as possible not sure of what kind of light Simone had cast me in during her conversation with Vanessa. “So I guess I’ll give you a call.” Simone smiled as if relieved. She took my hand and led me towards the house. Once inside she walked over to her purse sitting on the counter and pulled out a business card. She wrote her home number on the back and handed it to me. I stuck it in my front pants pocket.
“I had a lot of fun hanging out with you, give me a call sometime.” I nodded.
“I had a lot of fun with you also, maybe we’ll get together again,” I returned. Raoul and Vanessa stepped in through the sliding glass door. Vanessa made eye contact with Simone.
“You ready, girl?” Simone nodded at her and turned back to me. I opened my arms and gave her a hug. As we embraced she whispered in my ear.
“I hope things work out between you and Toya.” We released from our embrace and I smiled a thank you. She took one last look at me before grabbing her purse and turning towards the door.
“I’m ready,” she said. I got the feeling this would be the last time I would be seeing Simone. I think she understood that it would not be possible for her and me to have a friendship if I was going to make things right with Toya.
Vanessa kissed Raoul on the cheek and waved goodbye to me. Simone shook Raoul’s hand and followed Vanessa out the door without glancing in my direction.
I moved over to the end table and grabbed my cell phone off of Raoul’s charger. We both got our phones through the same dealer and actually bought the exact same brand and model. Raoul came over and stretched out in the recliner. I settled comfortably onto the couch with my feet resting on the glass coffee table. Raoul turned on the television just as I was finishing up dialing Josh’s number. He answered quickly.
“King, what’s up?” He sounded upbeat.
“Nothing much. What’s going on down south?”
“Man, shit is crazy down here. Stacey is straight stressing a brother.”
“I’m not surprised. Has she turned stalker?”
“Yeah bro, she showed up over here unannounced a couple of times tripping, wanting us to get back together.”
“I hope you’re not falling for that shit.”
“Oh, hell nah. I’m not with that anymore. I’m trying to be cool about the whole thing, you know.” Yeah I know, and that’s exactly what I’m afraid of. Josh was saying all the right things but his tone gave me the impression that Stacey was methodically breaking his ass down.
“Let me ask you something.”
“What’s that?”
“Have you and Stacey been together?”
“Yeah, I told you she been over here a couple of times to pick up some stuff. We talked a little bit.”
“That’s not what I mean, Josh.” He hesitated before answering.
“What do you mean then?” I snickered.
“Have y’all hooked up?” Josh burst out laughing.
“C’mon, King, you know how it is.” I exhaled. “That doesn’t mean shit though. We’re still not getting back together. It’s just break up sex. No big deal.”
“Josh, be careful. You might think it’s not a big deal right now but if you don’t pay attention, before you know it, Stacey is going to be right back up in your crib chilling like nothing ever happened.”
“That is not going to happen, King. I already filed for divorce; I’m not going back there with her.”
“Alright man. But I’m telling you. Soon she’s going to want to spend the night over there. Then she’ll start leaving her personal items over there, just like women do when you first start dating them and they want to stake a claim to you. A toothbrush in the bathroom, then a comb, before you know it her whole wardrobe is going to be hanging right back up in your closet, and she will have moved right back up in the crib with you.” Josh burst out laughing. “She probably hasn’t moved most of her stuff out of the house at this point anyway. It’ll be easy for her to move back in.”
“It ain’t even like that, dog. She has a couple of things over here but that’s only because I told her to take her time moving, I mean it’s not like I’m going anywhere.”
“Mhuh,” I muttered. I wasn’t buying it. Josh sounded about as confident as Michael Spinks at the press conference before his heavyweight title fight against Mike Tyson. I figured Stacey would be back in place within two months. And if and when that happens, I’m just going to wash my hands of the whole damn thing. If he wants to continue to get played by her trifling ass, it’s all on him. I’ve done my duty as a friend.
“Have you spoken to Toya?” Josh moved the microscope of scrutiny away from his situation with his wife and focused it squarely on Toya and me.
“As a matter-of-fact I have. She’s coming by later this afternoon.” I glanced over at Raoul passed out on the sofa. I was beginning to feel a little drowsy myself.
“So everything is cool between you guys?”
“I wouldn’t say that, but I’m working on it.”
“Look here, King. I heard what you had to say about Stacey and me; so now let me give you a little advice for a change. That girl is something special, and she loves you to death, regardless of how things are between you guys right now. Trust me, that dude she is supposedly dating is only in the picture because you slipped up.”
“Yeah, I hear you.” I got an uneasy reassurance from Josh’s words of wisdom.
“Now you need to go ahead and make things right,” he continued. “Cause I’m telling you, King. There is nothing in life that can compare to finding and loving your soul mate, and having them love you in return.” He paused and we shared the pain of his silence.
After hanging up with Josh I lay my head on the back of the sofa and stared off into the vaulted living room ceiling. I thought about Josh and Stacey’s marriage. It had the appearance of a perfect union, the coming together of kindred souls. Almost scary now that I think about it. Looking back on it, I guess the mere appearance of perfection should have aroused suspicion. I should have known better. When it comes to personalities meshing to form a relationship, there is no such thing as a perfect fit. If you see a couple who appears to have a perfect relationship, it’s a sham. Somewhere, somehow, somebody is concealing or misrepresenting something about themselves. Straight up lying, just like Stacey’s ass.
Toya and I definitely aren’t a perfect fit. A good fit yeah, but we have our differences. But our differences are a part of what puts the spice in our friendship. I liken it to a big pot of Louisiana gumbo. You take this big pot that would signify the relationship and add all these different ingredients. Things tha
t you probably wouldn’t normally put together in the same pot like sausage, shrimp, crab, and chicken. Those represent the different personality traits. You add them to a broth, with the right amount of seasoning to give it just the right flavor. Cook it at the right temperature and presto, dining utopia.
But, if you put too much of one ingredient in the pot it will overpower everything else and ruin the taste. Same thing with a relationship, you have to have the right mix for it to be any good. Sometimes the relationship will have things that you don’t particularly care for. Like crab in gumbo for me. But as long as you don’t put too much of it in there I can deal with it. I just have to pick through the crab to get to the chicken and sausage; things that I like. It makes having to sort through a little crab now and then worth the while.
That’s what was wrong with Josh and Stacey’s marriage. Yeah it looked like good gumbo, smelled like good gumbo, even tasted like good gumbo for a while. But eventually the crab overpowered the rest of the gumbo and made Josh sick to his stomach. And you know nothing will jack your day up quicker than some bad seafood, especially crab. And believe me when I tell you; Stacey is the biggest, nastiest, spoiled crab I’ve ever had the displeasure of meeting.
Back at my apartment I relaxed with a long, hot shower. The water beat against my shoulders while warm beads of mist sprayed my face. I closed my eyes and thought about the events of the last six months. I recalled my relationship with Shannon and how quickly it crashed and burned around me. It reminded of that time when I was about eight years old and I witnessed a passenger jet overshoot the runway and crash into a gas station. There was a huge explosion with flames shooting hundreds of feet into the air. The fire scorched everything. Homes, some of the businesses around the airport, the landscape, it was a mess. It happened so fast and was totally unexpected. Just like my break up with Shannon.