After I Fall

by Amity Hope

  “You could have all of those things one day,” I carefully said. “You’ve got your whole life in front of you. Don’t box yourself into some preconceived notion of what the future is going to be. The future is wide open. For both of us.”

  “Listen to you,” he teased. “Getting all philosophical.”

  “Sorry.” I was smiling and I really wasn’t sorry at all.

  “Can I tell you a secret?” Eric asked.

  I smiled at the question. “Yes, please. I like your secrets.”

  “You do realize,” he started with a laugh, “that I’m actually going to tell you something?”

  He shifted around a bit. The hammock bounced under our weight. His arms tightened around me. For a few moments he didn’t say anything. The night air was filled with the sound of the water gently lapping against the shore. A symphony of frogs and crickets arose from nearby.

  Now that the sun had dipped under, the sky would soon be dappled with stars.

  I realized that learning about Eric might even be better—or at least as good as—kissing him.

  “Tell me,” I softly commanded

  “I was really nervous about coming here,” he finally said. “You always hear all of these horror stories about foster care. About how people are only in it for the money. You know? I figured I’d just accept my placement, go into wherever I was sent. I’d keep my head down, try to stay out of trouble and just count down the days until my eighteenth birthday.”

  I reached over and took his free hand in mine. I looped my fingers around his. “That had to be really stressful. Not knowing anything about the family you were going to be living with. I can’t imagine.”

  I realized then how lucky I was. With my dad’s death looming over me for so long, I had always known in the back of my mind I’d end up living with Mom and Phillip. I’d hated the idea. But really, I had been lucky. Despite how mixed up my emotions had been all these months, I realized how lucky I was to have family to go to. A family that loved me, no less, even if their methods of showing it were sometimes less than desirable. A sudden wave of guilt coursed through me. I realized how much I’d taken it all for granted.

  “And now?” I asked. “How do you feel about everything?”

  I was surprised when he laughed quietly.

  “Honestly? That first day…,” I felt him shake his head. “I thought I had a pretty good grasp on what The System was like.” I smiled because I could hear in his tone that he thought of The System, as if it was its own entity. “But really, when my caseworker pulled up in front of the Zierden’s I felt like I’d stepped into the Twilight Zone. The house was nice, yeah. But it was them. Before her car was even parked the front door flew open. They both came out to greet me. They were both smiling like they were happy to have me.” He was quiet for a long time. Finally he said, “No one has ever been happy to have me. It was…weird. Like the Twilight Zone, I’m telling you.”

  I was quiet for a moment. He’d never really spoken about his family much. I knew that his uncle had cut him off. But it sounded as if he must not have been close to his parents either.

  “You should get used to that,” I said. “Knowing that people are happy to have you around. Because you know you can add me to that list.”

  He pressed a kiss to my temple. He gave the hammock another gentle push with his foot. I took advantage of the motion and rolled into him, snuggling a little closer.

  “What happened after that?” I asked. “After you got dropped off, if you don’t mind me asking?”

  “I don’t mind.”

  But I thought maybe he did because he was quiet so long I thought maybe he’d decided not to tell me.

  “It’s hard to explain,” he finally said. “I mean, without really knowing where I come from, I just don’t know if you’d get it.”

  “Try me,” I urged. “I didn’t come from here, either. I didn’t grow up here.”

  He laughed lightly but this time, it had a sarcastic edge to it. “I know that. That’s not really what I meant. You didn’t grow up where I did either. Or how I did.”

  “Okay, I’ll take your word on that.”

  “So I walk in,” he said as he quickly changed the subject, “and the whole house smells like chocolate chip cookies. Lisa gave me the tour. We walk through the kitchen and there’s cookies and homemade bread. She has a roast in the oven. I just kind of shook my head to myself because I thought only people on TV lived that way. Then she brings me to my room and the carpet is like, so thick my feet just sunk into it. My bed is this crazy, huge four poster bed with matching dressers. I felt like I’d just walked into some alternate universe.

  “The next morning, she has this huge breakfast made. When we’re done eating she insists on taking me shopping. I mean, I couldn’t tell her no. She spent so much money, she had to have blown more than an entire month’s check from the state on me. She bought me clothes and had me pick out cologne. She gave me a cell phone. I mean, it’s not mine to keep. She just added me to her plan so I’d be able to get a hold of them whenever I needed. It was just crazy.”

  “It sounds nice,” I said.

  “It’s hard to wrap my head around the fact that some people are just…nice. You know? And they’re nice because they want to be. Not because they get anything out of it. Does that make sense?”

  I nodded. “It does.” My thoughts automatically went to Phillip. What he had done for me…and my dad. He had paid an exorbitant amount of money for me to keep my car. And he never wanted me to know.

  “All they expect from me are the basics. Keep my room presentable. Show up for dinner on time. Let them know where I am. They did insist I get a job. That’s why Lisa had that job lined up for me at the country club. Both of them are big on responsibility,” he said.

  “I’m glad you ended up here,” I said.

  “Me too,” he agreed.

  “So tell me what your life was like before?”

  He hesitated when I made my request.

  “There is a huge chunk of my life that I don’t like to talk about. I mean, that I don’t talk about,” he said. “The car accident…I know I need to tell you about it. But I just…I can’t.”

  I nodded because I’d always felt like he was keeping things from me. But in a way, I understood. Some things were just really hard to share. Sure, I’d told him about my dad passing away. I’d told him how difficult it had been to move in with my mom. But I hadn’t told him, or anyone, how horrible it had been to watch my dad die. To face him at the breakfast table week after week after he’d been given just a few months to live. I’d never told anyone how I’d not left his side at the end. Or how I’d forced myself to be strong when all I wanted to do was crumble. I had never breathed a word to anyone about the way that—after being strong for so long—I had completely shattered only moments after his last breath was drawn.

  Yes, I knew a little bit about not wanting to share certain aspects of your life.

  “Do you think you’ll tell me about your parents someday? I mean what happened to them?”

  The pause that settled between us this time lasted so long that I didn’t think he was going to answer. When he did, it wasn’t what I hoped he would say.

  “I don’t know. Maybe.”

  I sighed realizing that he wasn’t willing to make any promises.

  Chapter 16

  “What’s going on?” I asked as I walked into the kitchen.

  Phillip was at the table with his cell phone to his ear. That was a rarity. He was usually pretty insistent that any meal time translated to family time.

  Mom was watching him as she sipped on a mug of tea. She raised a finger at me, the universal sign for just a second. Even the girls were quiet as they ogled their dad’s serious expression.

  “Well, thank you for letting us know,” Phillip said. “Keep me updated. I’d like to know when they catch the guy.” He ended his call and placed his phone on the table.

  “What did you find out?” Mom asked.
r />   I turned to Phillip, more curious now than I had been when I walked into the room.

  “The Devereux’s house was broken into last night,” Phillip explained.

  “I received a call from a mutual friend this morning. Janette’s jewelry was stolen,” Mom explained to me. “It seems the thief stuck to small but extremely valuable items. I asked Phillip to check in with Jim to see if he had any more information.”

  “That’s not the worst of it though,” Phillip continued. “Whoever did this destroyed the place. There’s thousands of dollars worth of damage. Broken televisions, smashed computer screens, anything of glass within the vicinity. Their son was out with friends but his car was in the driveway. His windshield was smashed in.”

  My eyes widened in surprise. Jace must be apoplectic. He seemed nearly as attached to his sports car as I was to my Chevelle.

  Mom let out a little sound of disgust.

  “That wasn’t very nice, was it?” Madison asked.

  “I don’t want anyone to steal my jewelry,” Natalie whimpered.

  I smiled because her jewelry was all of the cheap, costume variety.

  “No, it wasn’t nice,” Mom agreed. “If you two are finished, you can go wash your hands and go play.”

  Mom rarely let them go before the rest of the family was done eating. She thought it was bad manners. They both took advantage of her offer and darted from the room.

  “Why would someone do that?” I asked.

  “Good question,” Phillip said as he buttered his waffles. “Stealing is one thing. Trashing the place almost makes it seem as if it’s personal. At least that’s what Jim thought.”

  “What else did Jim say?” Mom asked.

  Jim was head of security at Calhoun Enterprises.

  “He didn’t think we have anything to worry about. He did suggest we start closing the gates at night.” There were gates at the end of our long driveway. I had assumed they were mostly for show. Obviously, they were for security purposes as well. “He was insistent that the security we have in place here is much better than what the Deverouxs have,” Phillip continued. “They have an alarm system but they don’t have security cameras. He figured there was probably a fifteen minute lapse between the time the alarm was sounded and the time the police arrived.”

  “That doesn’t sound like much time,” Mom said. “I mean, for this person to not only rob the place but to cause so much damage.”

  I stabbed at one of the remaining waffles on the platter. I was learning more by listening in than I was by interjecting questions of my own.

  “Do they have any idea who did it?” I asked, finally speaking up.

  “No. Not yet,” Phillip answered. “Carl was asked to make a list of people who might have it out for him.”

  “I hope he has plenty of ink,” Mom muttered.

  Phillip was barely able to suppress his smile. “The police are on it. But if I know Carl Devereux he’ll hire someone of his own choosing. He’s not going to let this go.”

  I drizzled syrup over my waffle as I thought that over. “What do you mean? You think it’s going to be a long list?”

  “If you ask me,” Mom sniffed, “it couldn’t have happened to more deserving people.”

  “What do you mean?” I asked.

  “Oh, that Carl.” She waved her hand at me and treated me to a rare eye-roll. “I think it’s safe to say that every crooked business deal that has gone down in Roseville the last few years has Carl Devereux’s name written all over it. I can only imagine that the list of people who would like a bit of vengeance would be quite long.”

  “He’s been trying to push his way into Calhoun Enterprises for years,” Phillip said with a scowl. “That’s the last man I’d let worm his way into my company.”

  “So he’s not very well liked,” I surmised.

  “That depends on who you are,” Mom said. “If you don’t know him well, he comes across as very charming. But for those of us who know what he’s truly like, we realize it’s best to avoid him.”

  Like father, like son, I thought.

  “That said,” Phillip added, “he has definitely racked up his fair share of enemies. This robbery could’ve been carried out by any number of people. Nothing similar to it has happened recently. Jim is going to stay on top of it. He’ll let me know if they catch the guy or if there’s another break in.”

  “Enough on that unpleasant topic,” Mom said. “How are you this morning, EmLynn?”

  “I’m fine, thank you.” I speared another bite of waffle and stuffed it into my mouth. Without meeting Mom’s eyes I poured myself a glass of milk.

  “Still upset with me, I see.”

  I raised my eyes to her and chewed.

  “What would you like me to say? That I’m happy you’re dating someone like Eric?”

  “Someone like Eric? What does that mean, exactly?” I pressed. “Because I’m pretty sure you don’t even know him. And since you don’t know him, you sure don’t have the right to judge him.”

  “What I know,” Mom hotly began, “is that you don’t know a thing about where he came from. Who his parents are. What they did. Are you even sure that’s the real reason he’s in foster care? Maybe his parents couldn’t handle him and had to turn him over to Social Services.”

  “I can’t believe you just said that,” I grated out.

  “Honestly, I can’t either,” Phillip said. “Tori, I think you should cut this kid some slack. From what little we know, it sounds like he’s had a rough life. Give him a break. From what I’ve seen from him so far he treats EmLynn well. He certainly seems to be making her happy. Isn’t that what’s really important here?”

  “Thank you, Phillip,” I said.

  “You’re welcome,” he said after a moment’s silence.

  “He could be some kind of hoodlum for all we know,” Mom muttered.

  “Tori.” Phillip’s tone was a sharp warning.

  “This is my daughter we’re talking about. I have a right to be concerned. Don’t you see? Yes, he’s had a rough life. I’m sorry for that. All I’m saying is that he comes from a completely different background than you. How can the two of you possibly have anything in common?” she demanded.

  “I can tell you one thing, he and I may have different backgrounds…but I have way more in common with him than I’ll ever have with you.” I pushed my chair back, the last few bites of my breakfast forgotten.

  I took my time reaching the front door as I left Mom and Phillip arguing in the kitchen.

  * * *

  “Did you hear about the Deverouxs?” Mason asked. He dropped a bag of chips onto the wrought iron table at the edge of our pool area.

  “Just that they got robbed,” Eric said. “I only know what Em told me.”

  “The place was trashed,” Mason said. “I ran into Jace while I was buying the chips. He couldn’t stop ranting about his car. Said he’s going to annihilate the person who did this. His parents are livid. There’s like thousands of dollars worth of damage. They’re staying at a hotel until a cleaning service can get in and take care of it. There are shards of glass everywhere. They might have to replace the carpets because they might not be able to get all of it out.”

  “Huh,” Eric said. “Didn’t know it was that bad.”

  He sounded pretty uninterested in the conversation. Probably because he didn’t care too much about Jace, his family, or what happened to them.

  “That’s terrible,” Clara said. “I can understand the theft, on some level. I obviously don’t agree with it. But being destructive and damaging to property is so pointless.”

  “My dad plays golf with his so he gave him a call this morning. He said he hired someone to find the guy. He plans on prosecuting to the fullest extent of the law,” Mason explained. “I can’t exactly feel bad for whoever did this. I’d hate to be on Mr. Deverouxs bad side but they kind of dug their own grave. Someone must’ve really had it out for Carl. I can’t imagine what the hell that person was think
ing.”

  “It’s hard to say why some people do what they do,” Eric said. “Hey,” he turned to Mason and pointed at the chips, “can I open these? Lisa bakes all the time but she never buys stuff like this. There are s'mores bars on the table.”

  “Yeah,” Mason said “go ahead. Where are the bars? Those sound good.”

  “Over there,” Eric pointed to the kitchenette at the end of the pool area. It was built into a covered alcove. There was a grill, small fridge, and sink behind a bar area. The metal pan of bars was resting on the countertop. “Right next to the celery and carrot sticks she sent,” Eric tacked on.

  Mason set off in search of food.

  Clara and I shared a smile, amused at how quickly boys could be distracted by their stomachs.

  “Maggie made up some sub sandwiches,” I called after him. “They’re in the fridge with some pasta salad and I don’t even know what else.”

  We had originally thought we’d grill. But none of us really wanted to take the time to do that. Instead Maggie had offered to make some food and put it in the kitchenette so it would be ready when we were.

  Apparently we were ready. I’d thought we’d swim before we would eat but the moment Eric heard me mention the sandwiches, he was trotting after Mason.

  Clara reached into the bag and pulled out a handful of sour cream flavored chips. She leaned back in her chair, her eyes on Mason. “Maybe I should help him make a plate for himself.”

  I laughed as the two guys fumbled around, looking for plates and whatever else.

  “They’ll figure it out,” I said.

  “I’m glad we decided to do this,” Clara proclaimed. “It was fun going out but now we don’t have to worry about running into anyone. It’s nice to have this whole place to ourselves.”

  “Yeah,” I agreed, “it is.”

  The pool was my favorite thing about Phillip’s house. I loved the privacy here.

  “You were right. It looks like they figured it out. They must be hungry boys,” Clara said with a very un-Clara like giggle.