Misadventures of the First Daughter (Misadventures Book 5)

by Meredith Wild

  “You are never to seek her out again. No phone calls. No texts. Don’t try to use your relationships with other agents to get close to her. The second I find out you do, you’re finished. Your exit will not be pleasant and it will not be honorable. You are being given a second chance from someone who rarely offers them, so take this as a blessing and disappear from her life gracefully. Don’t make this messy.”

  Take this as a blessing.

  You’ve failed her.

  Let her go.

  “I understand,” I say again, but my voice breaks.

  CHARLOTTE

  “I want to go back home.” I ease back onto my old bed awkwardly.

  “This is home. For now.” My mother’s voice lacks its usual icy punch, but it’s hardly warm. She covers me with a blanket without making eye contact. “The staff will take good care of you here.”

  “I’m fine,” I lie. I’m weak and my bandages need to be changed regularly, a task I can’t manage with full range of motion of only one arm. But if I was back at my apartment, I wouldn’t need to. I’d have Zane.

  “You’re not going back to your apartment, Charlotte,” she says, as if reading my thoughts. “Those photos.” She shakes her head almost violently. “I don’t need to tell you how much damage you could have done with your recklessness.”

  No one had mentioned the photos in Nate’s car while I was in the hospital. But as soon as the fog of anesthesia cleared, I remembered them. The threat of exposure hangs like a cloud over me now. Someone must have found them. Maybe that’s why I haven’t seen or heard from Zane since the shooting.

  My heart breaks every time I think of him. The wild look in his eyes when he’d discovered I shared the bullet that had ripped through him. The details were a blur. Everything had happened so fast. But Zane’s face is imprinted clearly on my memory.

  My mother switches on the bedside light. I grimace at the sudden brightness.

  “Can I at least have my phone now?”

  She rolls her eyes and goes to speak with the staff who hover nearby, ready to help. Her heels click as she goes. As usual, not a hair out of place. What would it be like to have a normal life? I’ll never know.

  She returns with a phone and hands it to me. “They had to get you a new one. The other one was lost in the scuffle, I suppose.”

  I take it from her, but I don’t miss the guilty way she avoids my gaze and presses on her pearls. She left me with Nate and never gave that vulnerability a second thought. She’s why I’m here. She’s why I’ll always wear a scar from that day.

  “Do you have anything to say to me?”

  She freezes, her perfectly sculpted brows pinching into a frown. “What do you mean?”

  “How could you leave me alone with him?”

  She straightens the blanket one last time, her lips tight. No apologies will pass through them, I’m sure of it.

  “Get some rest, Charlotte.”

  As she turns to leave, my father enters the room. If I hadn’t seen him, I could have sensed him. Everyone is on high alert. The staff with their attentive smiles. Even my mother adjusts her ramrod straight spine at the sight of him. He commands a reverent kind of attention. He is the very definition of power.

  “Can I have a moment with my daughter?”

  Everyone smiles politely and leaves us alone. When the door clicks shut, he comes toward me.

  He sits on the edge of the bed and takes my hand. “How are you feeling?”

  The smallest gesture of affection threatens to send me into a fit of sobs, but I manage to keep it together. “I’m better. Thanks, Dad.”

  “I didn’t want to burden you with this right away, but I figure it’s best to let you know where things stand. I’m aware of the photos Nate had in his possession before all of this happened.”

  I bite down on the inside of my lip. It doesn’t matter how much I love Zane or how little I regret every moment of being with him. Being exposed so explicitly to my father is still embarrassing.

  “I’m sorry,” I mutter quietly.

  He pats my hand. “I know. It’s okay. I’ve taken care of everything.”

  “Thank you.” My chest falls on an exhale. The relief is undeniable.

  But what about Zane? He’s been absent since the shooting. I desperately want to see him.

  “What about Zane?”

  My father’s expression reveals nothing, as if this is the most normal conversation he’s ever had. “He’s been reassigned. We felt that was best under the circumstances. He made no objections. Doesn’t much matter because I’ve been thinking about the whole Georgetown situation. Things have been moving quickly since the election and maybe asking you to uproot from New York so soon was rash. I spoke with your mother and we’re both in agreement that you should resume your coursework there for the time being.”

  “But…”

  My jaw falls. Not only because of my father’s sudden change of heart, but because I’d stopped mourning my life in New York the second Zane found his way into my heart. With him is the only place I truly want to be.

  Before I can speak, my father pats my hand again. The gesture is losing significance. I’m feeling less like a daughter he cares about and more like a pet he’s trying to appease so it trots off and leaves him alone.

  “Chester will arrange to have your things moved from View 17. As soon as you feel well enough to travel, he and a team will accompany you. Security has been increased, obviously. Nothing like this will ever happen again.”

  I sense the sentiment is half reassurance and half warning. But it doesn’t stop me from trying to figure out how I can reconnect with Zane as quickly as possible.

  My father ends the conversation with a kiss on my forehead and a swift retreat toward the door. With his hand on the knob, he turns. “And Charlotte. You’re not to have any further contact with Agent Parker. If you do, I can assure you there will be serious consequences. He’ll suffer far more than you will.”

  My heart is racing as the door slams behind him. My blood boils. A scream threatens to tear its way up my throat. Anger claws at my frayed nerves and wears down my already waning energy. Immediately, I reach for my phone and scroll through my contacts. But the phone is empty. No photos. No texts. No contacts.

  Zane has effectively been erased from my life.

  ZANE

  I stand in the center of Charlotte’s apartment. Chester let me know the movers would be coming by in the morning. I’d never have a chance to say goodbye to her, so this would have to do.

  For now, the place still feels lived in. Our dishes in the sink. My shirt on the floor. This is how she’d left it the morning of the shooting. The morning I left her for the last time.

  Being here is salt on the festering wound of missing her. It’s been weeks with no contact, but the hole in my chest only seems to be growing wider and deeper. How could a woman carve out so much of me in so little time?

  But falling in love with her happened long before I lured her into bed. How long would it take to fall out of love? I had no idea. I had no frame of reference for this kind of pain.

  My heart tugs me toward her bedroom, because I’m a glutton for punishment. The sheet she wore around herself that morning is still in a pile on the floor. I pick it up and bring it to my face. When I inhale, I take her scent into me. Her hair, her skin, her pussy.

  I should stop. I should get the hell out of here and never look back. Instead, I walk to the bed and drop down onto it, taking the sheet with me. I graze my palm over the ripples in the silky sheet. I remember her body and the hours we spent in this very place. I relive the way her back arched off the bed when I plunged into her over and over. The way she clung to me like she’d die if she let me go. The way she said my name, her lips falling open like she wanted to tell me more. Like she wanted to confess that she loved me the way she did in our last moments together.

  I close my eyes tightly and bury my face in the sheet again.

  I’ll never have her. Never agai
n.

  I have to learn to accept it. I have to learn how to live without my heart.

  Charlotte Daley was a mistake. But she was the best goddamn mistake of my life.

  Chapter Ten

  Charlotte

  I shiver at the frigid sensation of the metal stethoscope pressing against my back.

  “Okay, Charlotte, take a deep breath in for me and hold it.” Dr. Holden’s voice is gentle and measured behind me.

  I draw a deep breath of air into my lungs and stare ahead at the poster hanging on the wall. For the past five weekly checkups, I’ve done this exact same routine. This time, though, I’m fixated on the poster—a black and white portrait of a couple embracing in the rain—in a way unlike before. Was the couple saying goodbye? Were they reuniting? In my mind, it is the latter. Maybe that’s because I’m desperate for a reunion with Zane. Even though it’s been almost seven weeks since he was ripped out of my life, I still hold out hope that he will somehow find a way back to me.

  The doctor moves the stethoscope to another location on my back. “Excellent. Now, slowly release your breath.”

  I blow out the breath I’ve been holding, aware of the slight burn that it leaves in my chest.

  Dr. Holden smiles at me as he wraps the stethoscope back around his neck. “Your lungs sound perfect, Charlotte. I can tell you’ve been working on your breathing exercises. Just be sure to keep doing those several times a day. As I’ve told you before, it will take several months to get your full lung capacity back.”

  “When do you think I can go back to exercising?”

  “I think you can safely resume most of your exercise routines, as long as you don’t push yourself too hard. Be sure to start out with something slow and low impact, and then work your way up. If you feel any shortness of breath or pain, I want you to stop immediately and contact me.”

  I nod, relief washing over me. Something as simple as walking on the treadmill will give me something to look forward to every day. Zane is all I can think about anymore. I need all the distractions I can get now.

  Dr. Holden retrieves some examination gloves from a box. “Let’s have a look at your incision, shall we?” Using his fingertips, he gently applies pressure on my scar. “Have you been experiencing any pain or discomfort since I last saw you?”

  That’s a loaded question. Pain stabs at my heart every day. But it’s not the pain he’s talking about. Unfortunately, no magic pill will alleviate that.

  I shake my head. “I haven’t had to take any of the pain medication for a while now.”

  “Very good. I must say, I’m very pleased with your recovery, Charlotte.” He removes the gloves, tosses them in the nearby bin, and reaches for my file. After making a few notes, he closes the chart, and tucks it beneath his arm. “I feel confident enough in your progress to go ahead and release you from my care. Since your mother informed me that you’ll be moving to New York City soon, I have a colleague there that I will be referring you to. I don’t foresee you having any future complications or problems, but if something were to arise, Dr. Lang will take excellent care of you. Once you get dressed, I’ll have my nurse bring you her contact information.”

  Suddenly the reality of everything that has passed and the anticipation of the transitions ahead bear down on me. I owe my life to this man. If it hadn’t been for his quick thinking and skilled hands in the operating room, I wouldn’t be alive today. Now, my life is taking me back to a city I love, many miles away from the man I love.

  “Thank you for everything, Dr. Holden.” I try to hold back the emotion in my voice, but I can’t.

  He gives me a gentle pat on the back, his smile soft and sincere. “You are most welcome. I wish you the best of luck in New York.”

  A few minutes later, I meet Chester in the reception area. “All set to go, Charley girl?”

  “All set.” I try to smile, but my heart is heavy. Maybe once I get to New York this roller coaster will end and I can get my life back on track.

  I walk by his side toward the bank of elevators. We wait, and my thoughts drift until Chester’s grip tightens on my arm. His gaze is pinned ahead of us, and when I follow it, I am leveled by the gray eyes staring back at me.

  “Zane.” His name falls from my lips in a painful whisper.

  I stand frozen, too afraid to blink for fear he will disappear like some sort of mirage. I notice the dark circles that rest below his eyes. They make his handsome face look gaunt and tired. His broad shoulders lack the confident lines I remember, his once tailored suit seemingly a size looser on his body. Every part of him appears to reflect just how much of a toll these past seven weeks have taken on him.

  Zane steps off the elevator toward us, but Chester pulls me back, as if being this close to Zane would put me in grave danger. My heart flies into a rapid rhythm. He’s so close. Close enough to touch, if only Chester weren’t here to keep us apart.

  “What are you doing here, Parker? You know you aren’t allowed anywhere near her.”

  Zane’s eyes never break away from mine as he speaks. “The department scheduled my physical at this clinic. I had no idea she would even be here.” His voice is hollow, lacking the sharpness he always had around me, when he was protecting me…or dominating me.

  “Fine. We were just leaving anyway.” Chester urges me toward the elevator.

  His heart is in the right place, but I don’t move. I glance up at him, offering my best pleading expression—the one he can’t often resist when it comes to giving me my way. “Can I just have a minute with him?”

  His brows shoot up onto his forehead. “What? No, Charlotte. Absolutely not.”

  “Chester, please. I’m moving to New York next week. All I want is to tell him goodbye.” I speak loud enough so that Zane can hear me. If this is my only chance to see him before I leave, I have to let him know where I’ll be if he decides to come looking for me.

  “You’re moving back to New York?” The pain in Zane’s voice now matches the pain in his eyes. His gaze slides back to Chester, his eyes pleading as he speaks. “Just give me one minute with her.”

  “You know I can’t do that, son.”

  Zane takes a tentative step forward. “I’m begging you. One minute. That’s all I’m asking.”

  Chester’s jaw is tight. “Stop it, Parker. You’re only making this situation worse for her, and you know it.”

  Zane stares at his old friend, the pain draining from his expression until all I can see is desolation. He steps aside wordlessly, allowing Chester to pull me into the elevator with him.

  Panic sets in. I have to do something to convince Chester to change his mind. “Don’t do this, please, Chester.” I fight to free myself from his hold, but Zane’s voice stops me.

  “Don’t fight him, Charlotte. He’s right. I’m only making this worse.”

  Tears sting my eyes, and the panic tightening my throat doesn’t wane. I meet his stare, realizing our next few seconds together before the doors close will be our last. I’ll never see him again.

  As the elevator doors draw closed, dividing us, I mouth the words that will forever be etched in my heart.

  “I love you.”

  Downtown traffic is at a complete standstill.

  I stare out my window at a couple holding hands as they pass by on the sidewalk. My heart is breaking into a thousand pieces, yet everyone around me seems so happy. Why is the universe so determined to destroy my happiness?

  Chester finally breaks the silence. “Do you plan on talking to me anytime soon? If not, it looks like this is going to be a long car ride.”

  I wipe the tears from my cheeks. “Why did you have to do that to me? To Zane? All I wanted was a minute with him to tell him goodbye.”

  “You know I couldn’t allow that. Your minute alone could cost me my job, not to mention what would happen to him. It’s bad enough that the two of you even saw each other today.”

  I narrow my eyes at him. “I thought you of all people would understand how hard thi
s has been for me. I thought you cared.”

  The lines around his eyes soften. “I do care, Charley. More than you will ever know. I’ve watched you mope around in that house for weeks now. You’re holding out hope for something that isn’t going to happen. No matter how much you want things to be different, they’re not going to be. I know it’s hard, but you’ve got to let him go.”

  His words hit me like a slap across the face.

  “Let him go? How am I supposed to do that? I’m in love with him.”

  He frowns back at me in the rearview mirror. “After everything you’ve been through, you’re finally getting your life back. Isn’t that what you wanted months ago? You’re young. You have a bright future ahead of you in New York. It’s time you realize that Zane isn’t going to be a part of that. He can’t be. It’s that simple.”

  “Because my parents say so?” When he doesn’t answer, I stare out the window. “Someone’s been deciding my life for me since the day I was born. My mother is in New York choosing an apartment for me as we speak. Giving me a choice in the matter has never been a consideration, because that’s how it’s always been. Tell me, Chester. When do I get to make the decisions in my own life?”

  I hear him blow out a heavy sigh. “I don’t have an answer for you, Charley. God knows I wish I did. Maybe one day things will be different.”

  I trace my fingertip down the inside of the tinted glass. “I used to live every day with that hope. But now I think that hope has run out.”

  ZANE

  She’s moving back to New York.

  I still can’t wrap my head around it. New York City is a four-hour drive from DC, but she may as well be moving to Mars. Once she leaves town, she’ll be impossible to reach. This is it. The end.

  The thought of losing her forever is unbearable.

  Closing my eyes, I turn up the bottle of tequila and welcome the burning sensation as the liquid trickles down my throat. Desperate to numb the pain, I waste no time turning the bottle back up for another swig. The sooner I’m drunk, the faster I can forget how much I hate my life without Charlotte in it. Between my degrading transfer in the Secret Service and losing contact with her for the foreseeable future, I have plenty of reasons to stay intoxicated.