The Jigsaw Jungle

by Kristin Levine

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  Total After Savings

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  TAX

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  Payment Type: CREDIT

  Card: **** **** **** 6342

  Payment Amt: $ 17.22

  VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

  EXT. PAPA’S BACKYARD—NIGHT

  Claudia stands on a chair, hanging lights on a big umbrella. Papa is at the gas grill, cooking the hot dogs. Stewart follows Mariana as she totters around the patio. She keeps pulling petals off flowers and squealing in delight. Luis’s mom and Claudia’s mom sit at the picnic table, each drinking a glass of wine.

  MRS. FERNANDEZ

  Well, I have a friend I could recommend.

  MOM

  Really?

  MRS. FERNANDEZ

  Sure.

  MOM

  Oh, that’d be great.

  MRS. FERNANDEZ

  She’s technically a mediator.

  Stewart calls out from the flower bed.

  STEWART

  So much cheaper if you can do it that way!

  MRS. FERNANDEZ

  Then you consult with a lawyer to look over the agreement. Make sure everything is fair.

  She hands Mom her card.

  MOM

  Thank you.

  Mrs. Fernandez squeezes her hand.

  MRS. FERNANDEZ

  You’re going to be okay.

  Claudia jumps down from the chair and looks over at Papa.

  CLAUDIA

  Dinner ready yet?

  PAPA

  Few more minutes.

  Claudia nods and walks over to a card table. She picks up a box and turns to the camera.

  CLAUDIA

  Luis, one last puzzle?

  LUIS (O.S.)

  Sure.

  MOM

  Which one are you doing?

  Claudia holds up the box for the camera.

  CLAUDIA

  It’s “River in the Jungle.”

  PAPA

  That’s the last one we did with Lily, isn’t it?

  CLAUDIA

  Yeah, it is.

  No one says anything for a minute.

  PAPA

  Hot dogs and puzzles—almost like she’s here.

  He smiles.

  LUIS (O.S.)

  Go on, then! Dump it out.

  Claudia opens the box and pours the pieces all over the table. They fall everywhere, each different and colorful, each with tabs and pockets, each telling its own separate bit of the story.

  And nestled under the pieces, shining bright on the dark card table, is a white envelope.

  Slowly, Claudia pulls it out of the pile and shakes off the pieces. Luis zooms in.

  In Nana’s delicate handwriting are the words To my dear son, Jeff.

  PHONE TRANSCRIPT

  Claudia Dalton’s Cell Phone | Friday, July 24, 2015, 5:45 p.m.

  Claudia: Dad?

  Dad: Hi, Claudia. What’s up?

  Claudia: We were doing this puzzle. The jungle one, the last one we did with Nana. And we found an envelope in the box. From Nana. I think it’s a letter to you!

  Dad: What?!

  Claudia: Do you want us to send it to you or . . .

  Dad: I can’t wait! Open it right now and read it to me.

  Claudia: Are you sure?

  Dad: Absolutely.

  L M D

  January 23, 2015

  Dearest Jeff,

  I have a confession to make. Maybe I’m not quite on my deathbed, but close enough.

  Long ago, that year when you were friends with Brian, I thought you might be a homosexual. The thought made me very angry and afraid. I never spoke a word about it to you. You had that friend Amanda for years. And I always thought maybe the two of you would . . . but it never happened. Years later, when you brought Jenny home and introduced her as your girlfriend, I rejoiced, and not just because Jenny is a lovely person, but because it meant my suspicions were wrong.

  Unless they weren’t. I’ve had lots of time to think during chemo. I used to believe finding out my son was gay would be the worst thing in the world. But although I am so proud of you and all you have accomplished, you don’t seem very happy. I’ve spent a lot of time wondering why. The world has changed. Guess I’ve changed too. Because now I think that the worst thing of all would not be finding out my son was gay, but finding out he felt like he had to pretend to be something he wasn’t, not just as a child, but for his whole life.

  I don’t want that for you, Jeff.

  Perhaps I am wrong. Perhaps this is just the drug-induced musing of a dying woman. If I am wrong, please forgive me. But if I’m not, please know, dearest Jeff, that I love you no matter what. And if my suspicions are true, please be patient with your father. It might take time for him to come around, but he loves you so very much.

  I’m sorry I’m not brave enough to speak with you about this in person, but trying to survive another month, another week, another day is taking all my strength. I hope you will forgive me for all my failings. You were a wonderful son!

  Love,

  Mom

  NOTE TO READER

  SO YEAH, YEAH, everyone cried over the note from Nana. Then we laughed over how similar she and Dad were, only daring to say what they had to say in notes, and then hiding them away.

  Papa forgot the hot dogs and burned them for real, not just a little, but we ate them anyway and they were delicious. After dinner, I took a photo of the letter and texted it to Dad. He called back when he’d read it over again and he and Papa talked for a long time.

  When Papa hung up, he looked happier than he had in months, really, happier than he had been since Nana had died.

  VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

  EXT. PAPA’S BACKYARD—NIGHT

  Mom sits alone at the picnic table. She doesn’t look happy. Claudia sits down beside her. They stare at the lights on the umbrella.

  MOM

  I guess everyone knew except for me.

  Claudia says nothing, just puts her head on Mom’s shoulder. A moment later, Mrs. Fernandez comes outside and sits down on the other side of the table.

  MRS. FERNANDEZ

  You okay, Jenny?

  Mom shakes her head.

  MOM

  I feel like such a fool!

  MRS. FERNANDEZ

  I suspect this is going to feel pretty awful for a while.

  Mom nods but doesn’t speak.

  MRS. FERNANDEZ (CONT’D)

  You know, when I got divorced, people called me a fool too. “What did you expect?!” they said. “If you marry a dreamer, of course you’re going to argue about money!” I felt so stupid. Like I had done something wrong. Until I realized, when people blame you for what’s happened, they aren’t really talking about you at all. They’re trying to reassure themselves that nothing bad will happen to them.

  MOM

  Yeah. Maybe so.

  MRS. FERNANDEZ

  And when they do that, they miss the point. Because the best part of having something bad happen is learning you have the strength to pick up the pieces and keep going.

  Mom’s lips quiver and her eyes get very wide.

  MRS. FERNANDEZ (CONT’D)

  Oh, go ahead and cry. None of us mind.

  So Mom does.

  NOTE TO READER

  IT’S STRANGE, BUT watching Mom cry actually made me feel a little better. It was the first time I’d seen her not try to be strong for me, and it was sort of a relief. Like I could break down once in a while too, and I’d still be ok
ay.

  Eventually, Mom stopped crying and we all went and worked on the jigsaw puzzle. I had to show Papa how to sort the edge pieces, and told Mom to work on the red pieces, and Luis’s little sister tried to eat a couple of them, but finally we finished.

  Then we had ice cream cones, and Mariana fell down and started screaming, and Stewart took her home to put her to bed while Papa cleaned the grill and the moms tidied up.

  And Luis and I, well, we sat on the front porch and looked at the stars.

  At least we tried to look at the stars. But this close to the city, there was too much light pollution, so we watched the airplanes instead. I thought about all the people in all those planes. And all their stories. About how some were happy and some were sad and most were both. I thought about how sometimes you could buy your plane ticket and be super organized and early to the airport and everything, and still something could happen. There could be a thunderstorm or a fuel pipe could spring a leak or a pilot could get a flat tire on the way to the airport.

  And then you had a choice. You could get mad and cry and pout and let it ruin your trip. Or you could shrug and readjust. You could go back to the gelato shop and try a new flavor. Buy a magazine at the overpriced store. Or even just sit and talk to a few of the other people who were stuck there with you.

  I turned to say something to Luis and found he was already looking at me. No, he was staring at me. It was kinda weird.

  “What?” I asked.

  “Nothing.” He glanced away, then back at me again.

  “What?!” I asked, blushing. “What are you doing?”

  “Truthfully?” he said. “The Jedi mind trick.”

  And then I stopped thinking about the planes.

  “Really?” I asked. “On me?”

  “Yup.”

  “Oh.” He looked so cute in the streetlight. His hair all out of place. Some ketchup on his cheek.

  “It’s not working,” he sighed.

  “Are you sure about that?”

  He didn’t say anything. But I gazed at him. And then he leaned forward and then I leaned forward, and then suddenly we were kissing.

  And I felt hot and cold, then hot again. And my skin tingled and my heart pounded and I felt dizzy.

  “Oh!” I said breathlessly.

  And Luis smiled.

  VOICE MEMO

  Walter Dalton’s Cell Phone | Saturday, July 25, 2015, 9:15 a.m.

  [RECORDING BEGINS]

  Papa: Hi, Lily. Claudia is here with me today. She wanted to say a little something before she goes home.

  Claudia: Hi, Nana! I can’t believe Papa kept it a secret this whole time that he was talking to you like this. ’Cause I totally would have wanted to talk to you too.

  Papa: Well, sorry!

  Claudia: I just wanted to say we’re doing all right. We found Dad. Mom’s okay. And Papa did all this cool stuff with me this summer.

  Papa: We went to a bunch of those museums you were always trying to get me to go to.

  Claudia: And guess what, Nana? He liked them!

  Papa: I did not!

  Claudia: Yes, you did.

  Papa: Well, maybe a little.

  Claudia: We had a good summer, didn’t we, Papa?

  Papa: We certainly did.

  Claudia: Love you, Nana!

  [RECORDING ENDS]

  NOTE TO READER

  WHEN I WENT over to say good-bye to Luis, his mother came to the door. I thanked her for being so kind to my mother. She smiled, of course, and said it was nothing. But then, as she went to call Luis, I thought of one more thing I needed to say.

  “You really should watch his movie!”

  Mrs. Fernandez turned back to look at me. In her fancy church dress, with her black hair slicked back into a neat bun, she looked intimidating. How could I tell her what to do? And yet I owed it to Luis to try.

  “I mean, I haven’t seen it yet, no one has, but . . . he’s good at talking to people. And listening to them and helping them share their stories. At least he was with me. And I know he’s really smart and he’d be a great doctor, or lawyer, or engineer, but . . . I think he’d be pretty good at documentaries too.”

  She laughed then and took my hand. “You’re right, Claudia.” She smiled again, more warmly this time, and promised that she would.

  Luis had copied all the videos he’d recorded onto a portable hard drive and packed it in a little red box so I could watch them whenever I wanted.

  I don’t know how his movie is going to turn out or what it’s going to say about me and my family. I don’t know what the story of this summer will look like from his point of view. But I told him about my plans to make this binder and said he could read it if he wanted when I was done.

  We promised we’d stay in touch, and I think we will.

  TEXT MESSAGE

  Claudia Dalton’s Cell Phone | Saturday, July 25, 2015, 1:45 p.m.

  KATE

  Home

  Yay!!

  Come over and meet little Harry?

  On my way

  LEASE AGREEMENT

  BASIC CONDITIONS

  THE PARTIES IN THIS AGREEMENT ARE:

  The “Landlord” (in this lease the term “Landlord” means either the owner or his agent) AND Jeffery Dalton the “Tenant/s”

  PREMISES TO BE RENTED

  Address 175 West Elm St., Apt 3A, Richmond, VA

  TERM

  The landlord hereby leases to the Tenant the premises described above for a term of ONE YEAR, from August 1, 2015 to July 31, 2016

  RENT

  The monthly rent is $ 1200 .

  The rent is payable on the 15 th day of the month.

  Rent payment shall be paid to: Landlord at the following address: 175 West Elm St., Apt 1A .

  NOTE TO READER

  DAD HAS CALLED every day since we talked in the hotel game room. Sometimes we say a lot, and sometimes we just chat about the weather. If he’s running late to pick me up, even just by five minutes, he always texts or calls. “I don’t want you to worry . . .” Dad says.

  And he’s trying so hard I usually don’t.

  EMAIL

  From: Brian Tuckerman

  Date: Wednesday, March 7, 2012 7:45 PM EST

  To: Jeffery Dalton

  Subject: Hello from an Old Friend

  Hi Jeff,

  It’s been forever, hasn’t it? My 20th high school reunion is coming up soon and I’ve been feeling a little nostalgic. So I started looking up a bunch of people I used to know in school. I found your email online. A teacher, huh? Bet you’re a great one.

  I’m a lawyer now, and way too busy, but it pays the bills. My wife and kids complain that they’d like to see me more, but I do the best I can. I’d love to hear what you’ve been up to. If you ever want to chat, reply to this email or give me a call sometime. 301-555-9874

  I’m sorry we ended . . . on odd terms. I’ve always wondered what happened to you and wished we had stayed in touch. Anyway, hope all is well!

  Best, Brian

  From: Jeffery Dalton

  Date: Monday, August 17, 2015 9:31 AM EST

  To: Brian Tuckerman

  Subject: Re: Hello from an Old Friend

  Hi Brian,

  I’m sorry it took me three years to respond to your email! I’ve started and restarted this message about a million times. I’m sorry for the way I ended our friendship all those years ago. It’s been a bit of a rough year. I recently came out to my wife and daughter and I’m getting divorced.

  So, if you would still be willing to chat, it would mean a lot.

  Best, Jeff

  From: Brian Tuckerman

&nbs
p; Date: Monday, August 17, 2015 10:23 AM EST

  To: Jeffery Dalton

  Subject: Re: Hello from an Old Friend

  Sure, buddy! Give me a call :)

  VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

  INT. KITCHEN—NIGHT

  Mom and Claudia are at the sink in the kitchen, side by side, washing dishes.

  MOM

  A game, huh?

  CLAUDIA

  Yep.

  MOM

  Where you get to ask a question and then I get to ask a question?

  CLAUDIA

  Yup. Think of it as truth or dare, but without the dares.

  Mom laughs.

  MOM

  Sure, why not?

  CLAUDIA

  Great, I’ll go first.

  She scrubs a glass carefully while she thinks.

  CLAUDIA (CONT’D)

  Aren’t you mad?

  MOM

  With who?

  CLAUDIA

  Dad. He lied to you for years and years. How can you be okay with that?

  MOM

  I’m not okay with that. But my anger isn’t your problem, Claudia. I want you to be free to love us both.

  CLAUDIA

  Did you know? Did you have any clue?

  MOM

  I thought we each got one question.

  CLAUDIA

  Oh yeah, sorry.

  MOM

  It’s okay. That question’s just kind of embarrassing.

  CLAUDIA

  That’s the point of truth or dare.

  Mom smiles.

  MOM

  I didn’t know. In retrospect, sure, there were signs. Your father never even looked at other women. I thought I had the most sensitive and polite husband ever.