Damaged Love

by Sarah J. Brooks

  He smiled and gripped me firmly, but I could tell that this type of intimacy was not something he was comfortable with. His whole arm tightened up, and he held his hand almost motionless. I tried not to laugh out loud at his awkwardness.

  It was interesting how Marcus was relaxed and able to enjoy our lovemaking with his friend Zed there. Yet as the two of us walked intimately down the street, he appeared more uncomfortable than ever.

  Every now and then, I noticed him looking around either to the side of us or behind us. Certainly not instilling confidence in his notion that we were not in danger. I thought I even noticed his jaw tensing as we got farther and farther away from the town. We really were sitting ducks if anyone was trying to get us.

  As we walked down the dirt road, there was no place to hide and no escape if someone happened to come down this dirt road with wrongdoing on their mind.

  At the dairy farm, I stopped to visit with the owner real quick. He seemed a little leery of Marcus but warmed up to him when I said he was an ex-Navy Seal. Mr. Reynolds had been in the Navy also, many years before Marcus, though.

  The two men shook hands, and Mr. Reynolds took us out to where the cows were grazing. He had a four-wheeler with two seats in the back and drove us quickly out to the top of the hill where the cows were.

  “I’ve already let them into the field; I hope that works alright.”

  “Yes, that will be great.”

  “Just make sure the gate is closed when you head back to town. Have fun.”

  Mr. Reynolds took his four-wheeler back toward his house and left us at the top of the hill with about a hundred cows grazing all around us. I started taking pictures immediately.

  When I looked over at Marcus, he seemed to be in protection mode and was eyeing a large cow that was walking slowly in our direction. He looked like he was ready to take the cow down if he needed to.

  “You don’t have to be afraid of them; they won’t hurt us,” I said with a smile.

  “I’m not afraid,” he said as he tried to play off his uncomfortable stance.

  I could tell he was at least uncomfortable with the number of cows around us. He didn’t look like the kind of guy who spent a lot of time on a farm. Especially this close to the animals of the farm.

  A young calf made her way toward us, and I got down on my knees to take some pictures. She kept coming toward us with an interest that was very charming. Marcus grabbed some grass and held it out in his hand.

  I snapped some pictures of the two of them.

  Marcus and his tall, muscular frame feeding the small baby calf, with the sun setting right behind them, it was perfect. I hoped that the lighting didn’t wash out Marcus and the calf when I tried to develop the pictures.

  “That was adorable,” Marcus said as he looked at me.

  I was concerned he was going to get mad at me for taking his picture again. I really hoped he didn’t force me to delete the photo, it was so perfect.

  He looked at me and then at the camera. I felt him trying to decide if it was alright that I took his picture. He seemed to be going through some sort of internal struggle. But he was silent and did not force me to delete the picture.

  “Yes, that was very adorable. Should we head back to town?”

  I got up off the ground, and Marcus leaned over and wiped the grass off of my knees. He grabbed me close and kissed me. The spontaneous gesture was just another reason I was starting to fall for this guy. The softness of his lips was so opposite of his hard body that I instantly got turned on anytime I kissed Marcus. There was no way to stop my body and how it reacted to him.

  He grabbed my hand and held it in his as he led the way back into town. His grip seemed more comfortable this time, and he was much more relaxed. He was getting a hold of this whole boyfriend thing.

  Wait, boyfriend … was that what he was?

  I didn’t know the answer and wasn’t about to ask him. I felt like we were a couple now, but I wasn’t really sure. Maybe my perception of things was different than his. It wasn’t the right time to talk about things; we had had enough deep conversations for today.

  The term boyfriend was a simple one to most, but in my life, it could get complex. In the mainstream world, I couldn’t go around calling four guys my boyfriend, so I typically didn’t call any of them my boyfriend in public. The guys were my roommates or friends, and that was it. But when I was out with only one of them, I sometimes found myself referring to them as boyfriends because the moment called for it. We were now officially in this confusing stage of the relationship as I contemplated how I would navigate the public version of this when I was living in such a small town.

  We continued into town and turned down the street toward my house. When we got close enough, I could see that the front door was open. I turned and looked at Marcus, who instantly went into his protector mode. He brought us down the alley behind the house to see if there were any cars or anything. Then he opened the garage and did a quick look through my darkroom.

  “Get in your darkroom and lock the door. You understand me?”

  I nodded my head yes and quickly went into the room. There was no movement in the house, and all I could think about was that Zed, Rob, and Stanley had been hurt. Although Zed was obviously good at his job working side by side with Marcus, he could have been caught off guard really easily. I was terrified as I hid in the garage and watched Marcus look toward the house.

  Marcus had his gun drawn and took the sling off his hurt arm. He seemed to be able to move it slightly, but I could only imagine how much pain he was in.

  “Marcus,” I said as my eyes started to well up with tears.

  “I’ll be fine. Lock the door. I’ll be right back.”

  My brain raced with thoughts of what was going on. Why would someone try to break into my house? I could hardly breathe because of how scared I was. I tried over and over to take a deep breath, and nothing seemed to help.

  Chapter 20

  Marcus was gone for what seemed like forever. I sat at a table in the corner of my darkroom in the pitch black. I didn’t hear any shooting, and for that, I was very grateful. I closed my eyes and tried to listen as hard as I could. I didn’t know what else I was listening for; as long as there weren’t gunshots I was pretty happy.

  I heard a noise outside the garage, and the door opened. I tucked myself even deeper into the corner of the room. My heart pounded with excitement, and I was so afraid someone was coming for me.

  “Isabella, it’s me,” Marcus said.

  Oh, what a relief. I jumped up and opened the door. Marcus looked perfectly fine, so I let out a sigh of relief.

  “What happened? Did I just leave the door open or something?”

  “No, I’m afraid not. Let’s go get some of your things, and then you are going to need to stay somewhere else while I figure out what is going on. Zed got the guys out of the house and over to Stanley’s house.”

  “What happened? He didn’t fight them off?”

  It might have seemed like a naive question, but it was all I could think of. Why wouldn’t Zed, Rob, and Stanley just fight off whoever had tried to get into the house? Why would Zed get the guys out of the house and leave all my stuff there to be gone through? But even as the question came out, I could tell it was a little crude. I was more worried about my things than the well-being of the guys.

  “Zed didn’t have his gun or anything. He made the right choice to get out,” Marcus reassured me. “They could have been killed if he hadn’t moved as quickly as he did. I’m going to go talk to him in a minute, but we should go get your things first.”

  We walked back up to the house, and I could tell that the front door had been kicked in. It seemed odd that they would kick in the front door considering the back door was much older and would have been easier to get through. But I figured whoever it was who had kicked in the door didn’t really care which door was easier.

  My house looked like it had been torn apart. Furniture moved, carpets lifted u
p, someone was certainly looking for something.

  “Who are they? What were they looking for?”

  “I thought there had been three men the other day when I got shot, but I couldn’t tell for sure because things happened so quickly. One of them must have gotten away, and now he knows I’ve been staying with you.”

  “What does he want?”

  “The guns, but he can’t have them. Or he wants more money. The guns are already in Chicago, and we aren’t paying them any more money. I’m going to have to go back to Chicago and see if I can figure out what is going on.”

  I could feel the color draining out of my face. I couldn’t be left alone. These people were trying to find guns and would obviously kill if they didn’t get what they wanted. My heart raced, and I could feel the room getting wobbly.

  “Um, I don’t feel good,” I said just before my knees gave out, and I started to fall.

  Marcus, of course, caught me and set me down gently in one of the chairs. He closed the front door the best he could and brought me a glass of water.

  “What do you need from here? Absolute minimum,” he said as he prepared to go up the stairs.

  “Clothes and my mom’s jewelry box.”

  Marcus was gone for only about three minutes before he returned with a bag full of my things. He grabbed me by the arm and took me out to my car. He already had the keys in his hand, and we were driving down the street before I even knew what was going on.

  “Oh no, my camera. I left my camera there.”

  “It’s fine. You can get it later. Let’s just get you out to Willow and Marv’s house.”

  “I need to call them first and see if it is alright,” I said as if Willow and Marv would ever refuse to look out for me.

  “Isabella, you will get killed if you stay at your house. It will be fine with them.”

  I guided Marcus as he drove us out to Willow’s house. He called Zed during the drive and told him to bring Stanley and Rob out as well. I didn’t know how I could explain things, but I knew there was no hiding what was going on now. I was too afraid to hide anything. I needed to feel safe again.

  “Where will you go? How will you stay safe?” I said as I reached for his hand.

  He held my hand tightly for a moment but then needed to use it to drive. His injured shoulder seemed to be bothering him very badly by that point. It was leaking blood through the bandage and onto his shirt.

  “I’m going to go to Chicago. I have to figure out what is going on. I have to end this. I can’t let you be in danger, that isn’t going to happen.”

  I tried to swallow, but a big lump started in my throat. How was he going to stay safe if he went right back out there?

  “How do you know the people that tried to kill you weren’t the ones from Chicago?”

  Marcus seemed to ponder what I was saying and did not immediately answer. He looked in the rearview mirror and was preoccupied. I watched as he continued to drive to Willow’s house and took special care to make sure no one was following us.

  He never did answer my question.

  As we pulled up to Willow’s house, I felt my heart pounding very hard. My face was flush, and I didn’t know how I was going to explain things to Willow. I watched Marcus as we pulled up to the house, he seemed very focused and intent on a plan that I was not aware of.

  After parking in their driveway, Marcus jumped out of the car and went up to Willow and Marv’s door very quickly. He didn’t wait for me, and he didn’t look back at me.

  Marv opened the door, and I watched as the two shook hands and exchanged some words. Marcus motioned for me to come up, so I grabbed my things and made my way to the door. When I got there, Marcus kissed me quickly and shook Marv’s hand, and then he left. He didn’t wait around; he didn’t have time for small talk. He was just gone.

  Zed showed up a few minutes later with Rob and Stanley. He had clearly hatched a plan with Rob already and would be leaving town with him. I was still standing outside with Marv and Willow as the three guys pulled up.

  Stanley and Rob stood off to the side while I took a moment to talk with Zed. It was the first time the two of us had talked since the threesome. It wasn’t awkward at all, and actually, Zed was able to put me at ease better than Marcus could.

  “So you’re going to Chicago?” I asked.

  “Yes, Marcus and I are going to end this. He wants to stay in this town, and in order for that to happen, we have to take care of some things. Don’t worry, though, Marcus is the best. I’m okay too,” he said with a smile that flashed his deep dimples at me.

  Zed gave me a big hug, and it was just what I needed. I wasn’t sure how the relationship between the two of us was going to evolve, but at that moment, I was comforted by him. I felt safe with him, and I was just as worried about Zed heading off to Chicago as I had been about Marcus.

  “Stay safe, okay?” I said as I looked up at him and stayed wrapped up in his arms.

  “Always darling. I’m coming back to have a night alone with you,” he said sweetly. “If that’s okay with you?”

  “Yes.” I nodded in agreement. “I’d like to get to know you more.”

  “I’ll see you soon. We will be in touch. Let the guys keep you safe, though. Okay?”

  “Okay,” I said as Zed waved for Rob and Stanley to come over.

  “Take care of our girl,” Zed said before heading to his vehicle and back down the dirt road.

  “This is some crazy shit,” Rob muttered.

  “Yeah, I think I like those guys. Definitely more fun than Sam and Kirk.” Stanley laughed. “A lot more excitement in life now.”

  I stood in the doorway and watched Zed drive away. I was worried that Marcus and Zed were going back to Chicago to settle the score for whoever had come to his house and then my house. I was worried that Marcus was going to end up dead after confronting the people he was going to see. For some reason, I thought Zed had a more level head on his shoulders and could back off if needed, but Marcus seemed like he was going to go all out, no matter what.

  Never had I been so concerned for a man I had only met a few short weeks before.

  I knew it was going to be difficult to explain everything to Willow and Marv. My life had become so dangerous that even I couldn’t believe what was going on. I could see the concern on Willow and Marv’s faces, and I knew they wouldn’t be happy until I told them everything.

  So I did.

  I just let out everything. Stanley, Rob, and I sat in their living room, and I told them about sleeping with Marcus. I told them about my art show and following Marcus to the airport. I didn’t leave anything out, except the details of our nightly rendezvous and what had happened with Zed, Marcus, and I.

  Finally, I told them about my last couple of days and Marcus getting shot. I explained who Zed was and that the guys worked together. As much as possible I tried to flush out everything that was going on.

  It was all so much, so hard to relive in such a short period of time. I started to cry as I finished the story and ended with my house being broken into and Marcus and Zed needing to leave to go settle things in Chicago.

  Willow just shook her head in disbelief.

  “Isabella, this guy is bad news. You need to stay away from him,” Willow said.

  “I don’t think he’s bad news,” Stanley jumped in. “He has a dangerous job, that is for sure. But I really do think he’s going to do what is needed to keep her safe.”

  “Me too,” Rob added.

  I could tell that Willow and Marv weren’t all that impressed with Rob and Stanley’s defense, but I really appreciated them standing up for Marcus. Maybe someday when this was all said and done, the four guys and I could live happily ever after.

  “Yes, you’re going to end up hurt or dead if you keep hanging around that guy,” Marv added, totally ignoring Stanley and Rob.

  I could see where they were coming from. It wasn’t like I could argue that Marcus was a good influence on me. Since meeting him, I certainly
had put myself in a very delicate position. But I wasn’t willing to let go of Marcus. I held out hope that he would be alright, and this all would be settled soon.

  “I know it looks bad, guys. But just trust me, Marcus and Zed are going to settle everything.”

  “Isabella, this is not alright. You can’t be hanging around some mysterious guys who are murdering people and getting shot.” Willow did not seem pleased with my choices at all.

  “It’s not like that. Marcus isn’t a murderer.”

  “Well, actually, that’s exactly what he is. Didn’t you say he killed the two people in his house?” Marv said.

  “Well, technically yes, but they shot him and were going to kill him.”

  “Isabella, you need to get away from this guy, and that’s it. You can stay here as long as you need to, but you need to end things with him. He’s obviously only out for himself. Look how he just abandoned you here with us and took off.” Willow obviously did not like Marcus anymore. “Stanley and Rob, these two will take care of you. They stayed to make sure you are safe.”

  “I know how it looks guys. I really appreciate you letting me stay here,” I said to avoid further arguments because I really did appreciate them watching out for me.

  I wasn’t about to continue to argue with them. Marcus and Zed needed to go to Chicago and end this craziness so I could show Willow and Marv that things would be alright. Because at that moment, I was starting to believe them. Maybe staying away from Marcus was exactly what I needed to do to stay safe.

  I certainly didn’t want anything bad to happen to me. I didn’t want to end up shot or dead. It wasn’t on my ten-year life plan to have something like that happen to me.

  For the next two weeks, I continued to stay with Willow and Marv because I had not heard from Marcus yet. I intended to stay with them until I finally got word from Marcus that everything was alright. Rob went back to his home and his life, and we agreed to touch base when things calmed down. Stanley stayed with me at Marv and Willow’s house to make sure I was safe. He went to work during the day and then spent all the rest of his time with me. It was exactly what I needed.