Consensual

by Livia Jamerlan

  “Peyton lives in the same building as Sara, and she referred Braelynn to him,” Jennifer said, brushing it off as no big deal.

  “But that didn’t work out with my school schedule,” I said, jumping in before Loren became the overprotective mama bear.

  “Correct,” he added, stepping away from me and closer to Jennifer. “It was a pleasure seeing you again, Jennifer. Please send my regards to Frank.”

  “Likewise, Peyton. Please say hello to your mother for me. I’ve been meaning to stop by for the monthly book club meeting.”

  Nodding to Jennifer, he turned to face the rest of the group. “Ladies, enjoy your day.”

  Kennedy’s elbow hit my side when Peyton left our group. She knew how crazy I was about him, but she didn’t know I was already in deep.

  Using the money I won in Atlantic City, I decided to treat Loren and Jennifer to lunch. Gus had left right after I got my diploma, and Kennedy left soon after Peyton to start her shift at the hospital.

  Cafeteria was one of my favorite places to eat in the city; the swanky, chic restaurant served the most amazing mac and cheese. As I sat across the table from Loren and Jennifer talking about the latest gossip in Newport, my phone buzzed. I had two missed text messages.

  Peyton Haas: Can I see you later? Come over wearing nothing but the cap and gown.

  Holding the phone close to me, I typed back.

  Me: Can’t tonight. Loren is staying over. I’ll let you know when. Thank you for coming today.

  It only took a moment for him to respond.

  Peyton Haas: I had to be there for work. You were an added bonus. ;)

  I was thrilled when I read the next text message.

  Mackenzie Adams: Hey, girlie. I’m off tomorrow. Want to get a mani and pedi?

  Me: Yeah, I get out of work at 5. Can we go then?

  Mackenzie Adams: Sure, I’ll text you the place. See you tomorrow.

  Putting my phone away, I enjoyed lunch with the girls followed by an afternoon of shopping on Madison Avenue.

  Tuesday afternoon, I walked into the nail salon Mackenzie had suggested. I was early, so I picked a color and waited for her to arrive. As I was flipping through the New Yorker, the door opened and in came the woman who potentially held Natasha’s case in her hands. I stood to hug her.

  “Hi, lady.” Her raspy voice was sexy and sultry, matching her personality.

  “Hi, Mackenzie.” I wanted to help the case and possibly get information for a criminal suit against Drew, but it sucked that I had to lie to Mackenzie to do it. “Thanks for the invite.”

  “Anytime.” She threw her hand in the air. “Come on, let’s go get our toes done.”

  She locked her arm with mine and we walked through the small salon. I tossed my pumps to the side and climbed into the chair, soaking my feet in the bubbling warm blue water. The jets tickled my toes. Pressing my back into the massaging chair, I looked over at my new friend.

  “How was work?” Her eyes were bright and a full smile was spread across her face.

  “Eh, same shit, different day. How about you? Do you only work at Shakes?” I knew the answer to the question, thanks to Poochie, but I figured it was polite to ask.

  “Nah, I only work at Shakes on the weekends. I work at a shelter for rescue dogs and cats during the week. It’s nothing fancy. I make pennies, really, but working with all the lonely, innocent animals makes it all worth it.” She pressed the buttons on her chair until she found the pressure she wanted.

  Mackenzie and I chatted while our toes got pampered and our backs rubbed. Her file stated all the facts about her—her job, residence, email, and so forth—but I was getting to know the real Mackenzie, not the manila folder one. She was a southern girl, born and raised in Mississippi. Moved to the Big Apple for school, then fell in love with the crowded city and stayed. I shared as much as I could: where I grew up, where I went to school, and college life. I left out the fact Kennedy moved out here with me since I’d already told her Gus was my only friend.

  After our toes and fingers were painted, we sat in the back room and waited for them to dry. The guilt I felt only got worse with each passing minute. I hated that I was lying to Mackenzie. This wasn’t the type of lawyer I wanted to be; I didn’t want to trick people into confide in me. I wanted her friendship.

  Chewing on the inside of my lip, I looked down at my hands.

  “Hey, you okay?” she asked, bumping her shoulder with mine. I glanced at her and nodded. “You want to talk about it?”

  I hate this. “Nah, I’m okay,” I lied.

  I tested my nails to see if they were still wet before I dropped my shoes in my bag and slid on my flip-flops. After we both paid, I followed her outside.

  “So do you want to grab a drink?” Mackenzie asked.

  I couldn’t take the guilt any longer. “Mackenzie, I lied to you,” I finally admitted.

  Shocked, she stepped back. “What do you mean?”

  I sat on the bench outside the nail salon, and Mackenzie sat next to me. “I lied to you and I’m so sorry. I don’t work with Drew.” She moved to stand, but I grabbed her arm. “Please let me explain.”

  “Fine.” She sounded agitated.

  “I don’t work with Drew. I actually work at a law office. My client is Natasha Venturini, and she’s suing Drew for unfair and deceptive business practices and slander in a civil suit.”

  “What does that have to do with me?”

  “I had a friend look into Drew. You and three other women each filed rape reports on him, but then later dropped the charges.” I rested my hand on hers. “I might be able to help you put him behind bars.”

  “You lied.” She pulled her hand away. “I bet you’re not here alone, are you?” Her eyes darted around nervously.

  “Mackenzie, please. I understand you’re mad, and I feel terrible about lying to you, but I didn’t know how to approach you. When I spoke with Helen I came out with the truth right from the beginning and she shut me down immediately. I thought if I tried a different approach with you, maybe you would trust me, but I don’t want to lie to you. You seem like a great person and I don’t want to screw up our friendship.”

  I stood as she began to walk away.

  “Mackenzie!” I shouted.

  Turning abruptly, she marched back to me. “You don’t know anything about me.” She shoved her finger in my face. “And you sure as hell don’t know shit about me and Drew.”

  “But I know what a secret can do to a person. Trust me, I know. I’m just trying to help. If you know anything that can help the case, it would really help my client. My offer stands. If you want to charge him again, I’ll help you any way I can. Again, I’m sorry I lied to you.”

  I turned and headed back uptown. I’d probably thrown my case out the window, but I couldn’t be that person. No more lying.

  I felt like utter hell after Mackenzie stormed off, so I headed home. Taking the subway only halfway, I got off and decided to walk. I needed time to process what my next moves were. Maybe I was too invested. My feet trod forward; I felt defeated. There was nothing else I could find on Drew. If these women wouldn’t share information with me, I had no hope of making anything stick to Drew. If he faced no consequences, what would stop him from taking advantage of more women—both financially and physically?

  Later that night, I entered the apartment and found Kennedy cleaning in her booty shorts and tank top, the radio blasting. Kennedy didn’t clean the house unless she was stressed or upset. I rushed to the radio and lowered the volume so I wouldn’t startle her.

  “Hey, Lynnie.”

  “Need help?” I picked up an extra rag from the table. “Or do you want to talk?”

  She opened her mouth to answer me, but I held my hand up to stop her. “Actually, hold that thought.”

  I ran back to my bedroom and dressed in my sweats and shirt; then I stopped by the freezer on the way back through the living room and dug out my caramel swirl. With two spoons in hand, I sat next to K
ennedy.

  “Spill,” I said, taking a big spoonful. Kennedy sat there with a quizzical look on her face. “I know you, girlie. You don’t clean unless you’re worried or angry. So what happened?”

  After exhaling, she finally spoke. “I lost a patient today, and Caleb sucks ass.” She took the container from me and scooped a big spoonful. “It’s whatever, I guess. It happens.” She swirled the ice cream from side to side in her mouth.

  “Caleb? What did he do?” I questioned, surprised that she was upset with him. Since they’d been together—together was a relative term for them—she had never once been upset with him.

  “I went to the on-call room to sulk after my patient passed away. She was such a kind old lady and there was nothing we could do for her. When I sat down to close my eyes for a bit, there was a copy of Page Six on the bed with a collage of Caleb and some blonde bearded clam.”

  I thought it was impossible to snort ice cream out of your nose, but apparently not. “What did you call her?” I asked as I pinched the bridge of my nose and breathed through the pain.

  “A fucking bearded clam. Turn a bearded clam sideways and what does it look like? A fucking twat. And to make matters worse, the bitch is fucking gorgeous and has been photographed with him on the red carpet at a couple of different events. Page Six is saying they’re keeping their relationship hush-hush and out of the media.” She stood up and started dusting our bar.

  “But I thought you didn’t want a relationship?” I knew it was fucked-up to throw her own words at her, but she needed to understand that he wasn’t going to wait forever.

  “No, I don’t want one, especially when my shifts at the hospital take up most of my time. But I also don’t want him to tell me that he understands, then show up at the hospital to see me after he was at an event with her. I don’t want to be the consolation prize that he gets to fuck when she doesn’t want him, you know?”

  “I don’t think it’s like that, Kenn. Caleb adores you. He practically worships the ground you walk on. Have you talked to him?”

  She shook her head, her eyes glassy with tears. Standing up, I reached above her and grabbed two shot glasses and a bottle of tequila from our bar. “Come on, cleaning isn’t going to help you out of your funk. Tequila and takeout, on the other hand … now that’s a different story.”

  I poured us each a shot. Tilting my head back, I let the alcohol burn my throat before I looked at Kennedy and smiled. Her face changed. She was no longer pissed, but intrigued.

  “Who did you sleep with, Braelynn?” She took the tequila bottle from the bar and poured us each another drink. Kennedy read me like an open book; hiding anything from her was pointless. “Better yet, who are you sleeping with?”

  “What?” I squinted my eyes, acting as if I was shocked by what she was saying.

  “Nope, don’t you dare, my friend. I know you just as well as you know me. Don’t play stupid. You’ve been walking around here for the past two weeks with that freshly fucked grin on your face. I may be busy with work, but I’ve noticed. It’s your turn. Spill.”

  Biting my lower lip, I contemplated telling my best friend the truth, but before I had a chance to speak she beat me to the punch. “Oh God. It’s not Peyton, is it?” Her petrified face matched her tone of voice.

  I had no choice but to lie. “No. God, no. I’m just not ready to talk about him yet. It’s still new, you know?” I shrugged my shoulder and turned to put the ice cream back in the freezer.

  “Thank God. I mean, yeah, he’s all kinds of yummy, and what girl wouldn’t want to climb up that piece of goodness, but that would destroy your career if anyone found out.” She followed behind me. “So who is he? Have I met him?”

  “Yep, Peyton is yummy. That’s for sure.” I avoided her eyes. I knew exactly all the kinds of yummy he was. “So what do you want for dinner? I’m ordering.”

  The following Monday, I sat in my small cubicle still feeling defeated. Sinking into my chair, I couldn’t help the disgruntled look that was surely on my face. I couldn’t focus on anything but the Venturini v. Seymour case. No matter how hard I tried to find a way to link Drew to his charges, he was squeaky clean.

  My cell phone vibrated on my desk. I hoped it was Mackenzie returning my call and unlocked the screen. Instead, it was a message from Sara reminding me that she would be out of town this week and I could swing by whenever to clean.

  I needed to reach out to Mackenzie again, so I picked up my phone and sent her a quick message.

  Me: Hey, I just wanted to apologize again. I am so sorry about the other day.

  I waited for over twenty minutes, hoping she would reply. She never did.

  I was in a rut. The guilt I felt about what I’d done to Mackenzie was eating me inside. Kennedy was pulling a double shift this week so she could spend the weekend with Caleb, and I was avoiding Gus because I didn’t know how much longer I could continue to lie to him about Peyton. I was also ignoring Peyton because if I saw him now, I would turn to him for help, letting him know all the dirt I’d found on Drew. Professor Goldstein would never understand why I wanted to research Drew’s personal relationships. I needed to pick Peyton’s brain, see what he knew about Drew, but we had decided not to discuss the case. I couldn’t see him. Ignoring him was the smart thing to do, but my body craved his touch. I wanted to see him, needed to be close to him.

  It wasn’t just about sex anymore. I was falling for him, and for the first time in my life I was sure it was for the right person. I wanted to be with him, but I needed to make sure it wasn’t a conflict of interest.

  Deciding that I wouldn’t see or speak to Peyton until I had called the other two victims, I grabbed their files from my desk drawer and picked up my office phone. It was now or never.

  The phone rang twice before she answered. “This is Nicole. How can I help you?”

  “Good morning, Nicole. My name is Braelynn Wolf. I was wondering if I could have a moment of your time?”

  “What is this regarding?” she questioned.

  “I’m with an attorney’s office that’s representing a client on a legal case against Drew Seymour. I have a few questions for you, and I was hoping I could meet you for lunch. Please, Nicole, just hear me out.”

  I heard her inhaling and exhaling, and my eyes closed as I waited for her decision. “I have a prior engagement for lunch, but I can spare twenty minutes if you can be at my office at noon,” she stated.

  “I’ll be there,” I hurriedly answered. “Thank you, Nicole. I’ll see you at noon.”

  I pushed my other cases aside and rushed out to be there early. Her office was only a few blocks from mine, but due to the weather and the time crunch, I had to take a cab—it had been pouring all morning and there were no signs of it getting better.

  Opening the cab door, I popped my umbrella and headed toward her office building. Nicole was a junior associate at Moore Designs, an architecture company. I walked in, left my soaked umbrella by the front door, and headed for the receptionist. Nicole’s office had a school cafeteria feel to it. Aside from the spectacular blue prints and abstract designs that hung from the ceiling, there were no walls separating each person, just long, high tables scattered throughout.

  “Hi, I’m here to see Nicole Johnson,” I said breathlessly.

  “Is she expecting you?” the receptionist asked.

  “Yes, ma’am. I’m Braelynn Wolf.”

  She picked up the phone and dialed Nicole’s extension. After she confirmed that Nicole was indeed expecting me, she led me to the back office. “Follow this hallway to the last door on your right. She’s in there waiting for you.”

  I walked into the small conference room, and a caramel-skinned woman with dark brown hair stood to greet me at the door. “Nicole,” she said, reaching her hand out and introducing herself.

  “Braelynn,” I responded as I shook her hand. “Thank you so much for meeting me.” Nicole closed the door behind me before offering me a seat and sitting next to me.

/>   She rested both of her hands on the table. “I have to be honest with you, Braelynn. I really want to help you, as I can only imagine what he’s done to your client or other women, but I can’t say anything.” She looked sincere when she spoke.

  “I’m sorry, but I’m not following.”

  Exhaling, she brought her voice down to a low whisper. “I filed charges against Drew that I later dropped. I’m assuming you want to ask me why, or see if I can help your client with her rape charges against him. Trust me, I wish I could, but I signed a nondisclosure agreement.” Her voice dropped even lower. “His lawyer blackmailed me so that I had no choice but to sign it.”

  “Crap.” I sat back in the chair. That was not at all what I was expecting to hear.

  She frowned and her bright brown eyes were sad. “I did some investigating. There are four of us, and only one didn’t sign the NDA: Mackenzie Adams. She’s the only one who can help you.”

  Seriously? Why, oh why, did I decide to be a lawyer?

  “Thank you.” I didn’t know what else to say. The only person who could help me was the person who would no longer speak to me. Great. The pit of my stomach ached when I realized Mackenzie was my only hope. I guess there was no winning this case after all.

  “I wish I could help you, trust me. That man has taken so much from me, but my hands are tied.” She looked down at her watch and stood. “I really have to get going. I’m sorry I couldn’t help you.”

  I pushed my chair back and followed her out of the conference room. I said good-bye to Nicole, grabbed my wet umbrella from the stand, and walked out into the pouring rain, needing a second to gather my thoughts. I stood under the umbrella, letting the raindrops drown out the noise of the busy city and allowing my mind to wander through every possible detail that I knew about Drew. I moved toward the curb, away from the moving pedestrians, and found myself facing the other side of the street, debating if I should hail a cab or walk back to the office.

  Dirty rainwater splashed on my rain boots, but I paid no mind to it. My eyes drifted from one side of the street to the other, examining the possibilities, when a grin caught my eye and my brain finally caught up with where I was––the courthouse. And directly across from me in the courthouse was Peyton. Standing behind the glass door, he gazed at me as he brought his phone to his ear. As much as I wanted to escape him and stay far away, I couldn’t. My heart accelerated in my chest.