“A dress.” I chirped.
“For what? You have a ton of dresses.”
“Our firm is hosting a benefit tomorrow night. I thought I told you.”
“Um, no. But it sounds like fun.” I could hear the relief in her voice.
“Yeah, it should be,” I replied, thinking, ‘I hope so.’ I dropped my purse on the counter, and thumbed through my mail, tossing it down, too. “But I think everyone is going to get really dressed up, and all my dresses are casual. I guess it’s a black-tie event.” Then I started to worry about money. (I made a little money at my internship, but not much.) Yikes, how much would a gown cost?
“You know,” she said lifting and pointing her finger at me. “Melinda told me about this great dress shop downtown.”
I worried even more. How much was this going to set me back?
“She said they were really reasonably priced.”
“Yes!” I blurted it out.
“What?” Allison asked, startled.
“Oh, sorry, you just said the magic word. Reasonable.” She giggled.
“You ready?” She nodded toward the door.
“Yes.” I moved into the kitchen and opened one of the top drawers. “And here’s a key. Next time, let yourself in. And tell Ethan to use it sparingly, will ya?” I held it out for her.
“I don’t even need to let him know I have it,” she said. I doubted that.
Allison was right. There were a ton of beautiful dresses, but they were still pretty expensive. I also couldn’t believe the styles: bright colors, ruffles and plunging necklines. Most of the dresses were not to my taste. We sat down in the only pair of chairs in the place surrounded by ruffles, bows and taffeta. My shoulders slumped with defeat. I held the hem of a very revealing neon dress, wondering to myself if I would find anything. But then I looked up and saw it. It was dark blue with just the slightest whisper of sheen. It was hiding between a dress that looked like it was on vacation from South Beach and another that could’ve been from a Disney cartoon. I pulled it from the rack and held it up for Allison.
Allison nodded, and as luck would have it, it was my size. She followed me to the dressing room. While Allison waited outside urging me to hurry, I held it in front of me, looking at the color and shape. Once I pulled it on I knew it was the one. It was strapless and fit snugly from my waist across my chest. It wasn’t low or daring, but it was classic. At the waist it flared out and landed just at my knee. I twisted and listened to the skirt swish back and forth as I moved. I turned to see the back and was happy with the way it fit without being too tight. When I opened the dressing room door, Allison took a step back. She looked at me and brought her hands up to her cheeks.
“Seriously Emily, If you don’t buy that dress I’ll kill you.” She was such a hoot.
I laughed and did a twirl for her loving the way the dress made me feel.
***
Saturday afternoon arrived, and I started to get ready for the benefit. After soaking for a long time in a lavender-scented bubble bath, I was ready to transform to an Emily suited for a party.
My hair was getting long enough to do something with, so I decided to pull a few pieces from the front, pinning them in place at the crown of my head. I let a few strands fall around my face, and left the back loose to fall just past my shoulders. In the southern California air it was full and wavy, just the way I liked it. Summer had added some strawberry blond to my otherwise brown hair and with the pieces pulled back, you could really see the highlights. I kept my makeup light but added a little grey eye shadow on my upper lid. I finished my makeup with a deep lip-gloss. I wasn’t tan with all the sunscreen I wore, so the dark blue really set off my light skin. I finished with some dark sapphire crystal earrings that went beautifully with the dress. When I looked in the mirror, I liked what I saw. It was the first time in what seemed like ages I looked and felt great. This was going to be a good night; I could feel it.
Before I left I slipped on some silver heels that were almost invisible. I loved these shoes. They had just a tiny strap across the toes and a thin three-inch heel. My mom picked them out for me at least a year ago, but I hadn’t had an occasion to wear them lately. I dotted a little Chanel No. 5 on my neck and wrists, and with a tiny silver mesh purse, I was out the door.
I turned, holding the doorknob to lock it, and heard someone clear his throat. I looked over my shoulder and saw Kyle standing there.
“Well…hello Emily, how are you?” he asked.
“Hi,” I said, almost relieved it was him. “I’m just heading out.”
“I see that.” He smiled, noting my dress. “I was starting to wonder if you did laundry anymore.”
“Actually, I’m down to my last pair of socks, so I’ll be there tomorrow.” I glanced at my car thinking I better get going.
“Then it’s a date,” he said, moving to the side of the walk for me to pass. I didn’t say anything back, but I did look over my shoulder at him as I walked to my car.
The benefit was held at the Pacific Center for the Arts. The same place where Graham’s mother was the curator. This occurred to me when Sharon told me about the benefit, but I figured I couldn’t live in hiding forever, and she might not even be there. And let’s face it, Sharon and Colin both made a point of telling me it was important to come, so I thought “job requirement.” I made a silent vow on the way in to not associate my evening with Graham in any way.
I walked up the stairs, passing between two beautiful glass doors encased in iron frames. On each side were planters filled with bright pink azaleas, and as I walked through the doors, I noticed large bouquets of bright pink roses on top of tall glass tables. The first room I entered was large, with paintings on every wall and sculptures sprinkled throughout. Servers circulated with silver trays of hors d'oeuvres and bubbly, Champagne-filled glasses. I started to feel out of my league. I caught myself fidgeting and pushed my arms down to my sides. Trying to appear confident, I looked around the room for Whitney. Instead, I saw Colin. He was in the middle of a conversation with one of the principals of the firm. I somehow caught his eye and he smiled at me approvingly. I’m sure it was just a gesture on his part, but it boosted my confidence, at least for the moment.
I didn’t feel like interrupting anyone’s conversation and everyone seemed to be having one. I made my way to one of the walls to check out the paintings. I’m hugely interested in art history as well as contemporary art. It took only minutes for me to be so engrossed I hardly remembered I was at a party. I was in the middle of admiring the amazing way one of the artists used color when I saw a Champagne glass in front of me. I looked over my shoulder and saw Colin.
“Oh, thank you.” I took the glass from him and lifted it for a tiny sip. We both turned toward the artwork. “This Kandinsky is unbelievable. Look at the depth and vivid color. I pointed to the deep violet sky, then pulled my hand back remembering my first date with Graham and the unbelievable kiss we shared while looking at his parents’ Toulouse-Lautrec. I didn’t want to remember that right now, and I think Colin sensed it.
“Are you OK, Emily?” he asked.
“Yeah, I mean, yes, of course.” I stammered. He didn’t look convinced. Sharon joined us then, so I didn’t have time to explain.
“Well hello, you two.” She smiled at both of us. “You look quite elegant, Emily. Doesn’t she, Colin?” Sharon gave Colin a mischievous smile that I almost missed.
“Yes Emily, you look very nice.” He looked at me when he said it, then back to Sharon. They exchanged a look that must have meant something only to them before Sharon excused herself to greet another colleague.
I glanced beyond Sharon and saw a table with all kinds of items on it. People were walking by and, I couldn’t tell, doing something.
“Do you want to place a bid?” Colin asked, noticing where I was looking.
“Pardon?” I had no idea what he was talking about.
He lifted his glass, pointing as he held it. “The silent auction. Do yo
u want to bid on something?”
“Oh.” What a dope I was.
“Come on. Let’s go check it out.” He gestured for me to go first, and we moved across the room weaving around groups of people toward the silent auction table. I turned around when I heard someone call Colin’s name. He paused, leaning toward me and whispered, “Go ahead, I’ll be right there.” I nodded and walked the rest of the way over to the table. Starting at one end, I looked through the generous prizes. There was a two-night stay at a hotel in Laguna Beach. Mental note: check out Laguna. There was dinner for two at what appeared to be a swanky restaurant in Santa Monica, and it went on from there. They were all nice, but who would I do any of this romantic stuff with? The “alone” factor coupled with my peanut-sized intern salary made it impossible for me to bid on anything. It was intriguing, though. What a cool way to raise money for charity.
I was eyeing a beautiful diamond pendant that had several bids when I felt someone come up behind me. He swept the back of his hand from between my shoulder blades down to the middle of my back letting it linger there for just a second.
“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” he asked, letting his hand drop.
“Yes, it’s lovely. It’s great that businesses donate all of this. Very generous.”
“Well it’s for a good cause, and no one can say no to Sharon.” That made sense. I surely couldn’t.
I moved to the next item, and Colin followed not even a full step behind me. This was new. Our interactions felt the slightest bit warmer now that he wasn’t reluctant to treat me as a peer. He was nice, and I enjoyed being around him.
At dinner we weren’t seated at the same table-which was fine-but secretly I was a little disappointed. Whitney was at my table, though, and turned out to be the belle of the ball. She wore a very daring but beautiful black dress with the highest heels I had ever seen. I didn’t believe she could dance in them, but when the music started she proved me wrong.
After dinner, people were dancing or socializing, but I stayed at the table among half-eaten pieces of cake and lipstick stained Champagne glasses enjoying the music. The party buzzed with conversation, and music filled the room. I enjoyed watching everyone have a great time. I think the benefit was a success, and Sharon’s smile made me sure of it. I turned back to the table, taking a sip of my drink.
“Hello, Emily.” I turned my head toward the voice, and there in front of me was the very person I dreaded.
“Mrs. Mitchell.” It was Graham’s mother. I had hoped she wouldn’t be there since it was an after hours affair, but I was wrong. “It’s nice to see you.” I tried to act as if it was. For a fleeting second I thought I shouldn’t hold her responsible for Graham’s actions. Then I remembered what he said about his family urging him to go back to Nicole. I was angry all over again.
“Are you having a nice time, dear?” she asked in her smooth, icy voice.
“Yes, there’s so much to see.” I looked toward the artwork. “I’ll have to come another time and take a tour,” I said, hoping she would continue to keep our conversation light, and hoping I wasn’t showing my true feelings.
“Oh, so you know of these artists?” she asked whirling her hand in the air to include everything in the room. Of course I didn’t, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t appreciate what I saw. She seemed surprised and doubtful at the same time.
“Well, some at least,” I said, trying to add a hint of laughter to my voice. She didn’t get it. Her lips stayed turned down, and her stare was long and chilly. The day I met her with Graham on my arm, she must have barely tolerated me. I could see her true feelings now, even in this short exchange.
She looked up and away, waving at someone in the crowd. A relaxed and polished smile returned to her face. “Lovely to see you,” she said and took a step past me. I doubted that, but I still thought I’d be polite.
“Lovely to…” She was gone before I could finish my sentence. A simple exchange loaded with attitude, then she turned and walked away. I sighed to myself. Sort of a half-laugh, half-huff with a sigh somewhere in there. There was no way in hell I was going to take a tour now. I would check out all the art this evening, because I was NOT returning. I rested my hand on the table and tried to steady myself.
“Emily, I was wondering…” Colin approached from behind me as Graham’s mother walked in the opposite direction. “Are you OK?” That was the second time tonight he felt the need to ask me that. I must not have been hiding my feelings well at all. At least not around him.
“I’m good.” I took another deep breath.
“No, you’re not. All the color is gone from your face. Who was that woman?” he asked as if she was an evil villain from a comic book.
“Oh, no one,” I said, but he didn’t look like he believed me.
He knelt down to my level. “You can talk to me.” I looked at him, realizing maybe I could, and maybe it wouldn’t hurt to have one more friend. Colin glanced at all the people walking around the table. “Come on,” he said taking my hands to stand me up. He led me to a less congested area of the room.
“I knew something was wrong before school ended, and I see it here, too. Maybe I can help,” he suggested.
I didn’t know if that was possible, but I felt comfortable with him and I felt myself start to open up. “Remember Graham? You met him at the movies a few months ago.” He nodded and continued to look at me, ready for me to go on.
“Well, basically.” I wanted to keep it short. “I was in a relationship with him, but it turned out he was just biding his time with me until his ex-girlfriend returned.” I shrugged my shoulders trying to keep it as light as I could. I don’t think I was fooling anyone; not even me. “Oh, and that,” I looked back in the direction of the table. “That was his mother.”
I saw the look on Colin’s face then. He cared, and that surprised me. It was nice. Maybe he was my friend. “You know Emily, you won’t be sad forever. You’ll get through this.” The softness in his eyes was so comforting. I wondered if it had always been there; I couldn’t remember. “Guys your age.” He stopped and looked down at his feet. “He didn’t know what he had.” He looked up at me again and touched the outside of my hand with his fingers.
We were both in a slight trance, then I remembered something. “What were you wondering?”
“What was I?” He paused, still keeping his eyes on me. “Oh, I wondered if you wanted to dance.”
“I’d love to.” And I really did.
We danced a far more appropriate dance than the kind you see at clubs. It was civilized and quite nice actually. With one hand on my waist and the other clasping mine, we moved onto the dance floor. We talked, and Colin kept the topics light; which I appreciated. It was a really nice evening from that point on, and I was glad he was sharing it with me.
NINE
The Third Wheel
After that night I began to see things a little differently. I went home wondering if maybe there was more to life than Graham-longing and sadness. I felt something with Colin. Something I didn’t expect. Maybe there was a chance for me, and maybe it was OK to let Colin in. Part of me wanted to, but there was still a part that couldn’t let Graham go.
I woke up bright and early that Sunday. The benefit ended after midnight, so I didn’t expect to be up at seven the next morning. I felt great and decided to go with it. I slipped on my last pair of clean socks, noting that laundry was a necessity today. I smiled, remembering Kyle’s comment about our laundry date. Silly really, but cute. I pulled on my running shoes and tied my hair back in a ponytail. Since I started running again, there was a certain rhythm returning to my life. I was definitely feeling that rhythm today.
My run was awesome. There were days when I felt like I should’ve just stayed home. Or days when I was long on my run and felt tired…but for some reason, not today. I did my usual five mile loop, and did it in record time. I felt great. It was going to be another hot day, and I could feel the temperature going up. I was drenched in sweat
when I got back to the apartment. I stood in the kitchen trying to control my breathing long enough to gulp some water and great, the phone’s ringing. Perfect, I can barely breathe let alone answer the phone.
“Hey Allison,” I said recognizing her voice immediately.
“What were you doing? Jumping Jacks or something?”
“No, I just came in from a run.” I finally caught my breath.
“So how was it?”
“My run? Oh fine.”
“No silly, the benefit.”
“Oh, you know what? I had a great time. It was more fun than I thought it would be.” I heard her sigh with relief. Then part of me didn’t want to tell her that I ran into Graham’s mother, but I felt like I should. “The only bummer was that I saw Graham’s mom.”
“What? What was she doing there?” Allison asked, surprise in her voice.
“I told you she’s the curator where the event was held. Remember? I hoped she wouldn’t be there, but there’s nothing like being wrong.” I tried to joke.
“You seem OK, Emily. Are you…OK?” she asked, concerned.
“Yes, I think I am.” I paused for a second thinking and wondering to myself if I was telling the truth.
“We had a great time,” I said. “The museum was the coolest. The paintings and sculptures along with the delicious food.”
“Wait.” She stopped me. “We? Who’s we?”
“Oh, you know, the other people I work with.” I don’t know why, but I wasn’t ready to tell her about Colin. Then again, maybe there was nothing to tell.
“Oh. Well. I’m glad you had a good time. You needed it.”
When I thought about it, she was right. It was exactly what I needed.
“Hey, there’s a party tonight at the beach. Want to go?” she asked, and I could hear her take a drink of coffee or something.
“Yeah. That sounds like fun. Should I meet you and Ethan there?” I figured I’d be the third wheel, but that was OK, I guess.
“We can pick you up. Say, around seven?”
Emily Calls It (The Emily Series) Page 5