Peace River (Rockland Ranch Series)

by Jaclyn Hawkes

She wished there were something she could do to help. “Tell me what I can do for you. What do you need?” She could tell he was in pain and still needed to sleep.

  He gave her a weak smile. “Time to heal. The nurse just gave me pain medication, and other than to see your pretty face, there’s not a thing I need.” She sat beside him, and he drifted back to sleep. She leaned her head against his bed and was dozing again when Rossen and Naomi returned.

  ****

  Bo and Joey had told Naomi how nervous Isabel had been at the rodeo. She wondered if Isabel was that way every time.

  Rossen seemed to read her mind and said, “She’s held up well considering what she saw that first night. These last several rodeos she’s been a trooper as far as I know. We’re never with her when he rides bulls because I’m helping at the chute, but I think she’s been okay.

  “I can’t imagine what went through her head last night.”

  Naomi stayed overnight and when Slade seemed to be out of the woods the next day, she and Rossen started to plan out the next few days and weeks. The doctors wanted him to stay hospitalized for another three or four days and then he needed to recuperate for at least several weeks. For the first little while he would need a lot of care. He had a six inch incision in his stomach and internally he was still terribly fragile and was not to do anything but lie around for at least ten days. Then it would be weeks before he could do anything even mildly strenuous.

  With Slade’s input, they decided to take him home to the Rockland Ranch, and Isabel and Naomi would help him as long as he needed them. When he was a little stronger, Rossen would take Sean, who had offered to take a college semester off, and head back out on the road to try to salvage their run at the NFR. They would play it by ear as to whether Slade would really be up to that, even though it was still more than four months away.

  Slade was incredibly weak and tired. Everything he owned hurt when he tried to move. So far about all he had been up to was occasionally raising and lowering the head of his hospital bed.

  Isabel was always there beside his bed when he awoke, always attentive to his needs. He wondered if she ever ate or slept

  Even though it’d been more than two days since his surgery, they hadn’t let him eat and he hadn’t even missed it. He was used to being so physically strong and independent, and it was proof of what rough shape he was in that he was willing to just rest and let the people around him fuss. Now he was stiff, not only from his injuries but also from just laying there. He knew it, but was unable to move much to ease the stiffness because of the pain. Even the physical therapist hadn‘t helped much. Slade felt like one big bruise. The medication helped the pain, but often left him in such a haze that the only thing he really knew for sure was that Isabel was always at his side. It was incredibly sweet to have her near.

  ****

  Isabel was still there. She watched over him and prayed, and he knew it was hard for her to see him so badly hurt. Slowly and gradually he improved, and on the morning of the fifth day he felt like he had turned a corner. He was finally hungry and wanted to stand up and try walking around.

  With the help of the physical therapist he moved to the edge of his bed. He was light-headed and they had him just sit there for several minutes, then lie back down.

  It was the first time Isabel saw his back and he heard her gasp. When he looked around, there were tears in her eyes and he tiredly asked, “What?”

  She shook her head and then whispered, “Almost your whole back is bruised.”

  With a weak smile, he said, “I know, honey. But don’t worry. My heart’s strong as ever.”

  All she did was close her eyes and swallow hard.

  The next day they removed some of the taping from his dislocated shoulder and he was backing off on the pain pills, so he was much more alert. Sometimes she caught him quietly watching her and he knew she wondered what he was thinking. He hoped she trusted the things he’d said when he was sedated.

  That afternoon he finally stood up and, although he felt ridiculously weak, he was elated. He wanted out of this hospital in the worst way. He wanted real food and more than two hours of uninterrupted sleep at a time. There were a lot of things he wanted.

  For days he’d watched Isabel near his bed and it was incredibly frustrating to be so incapacitated. Sometimes late at night when he was awake, they talked into the early morning hours. He’d told her things he never told anyone, not even Rossen, and felt that she’d done the same with him. Their backgrounds were in some ways opposites, but in many ways they had a lot in common.

  She’d asked him about the two bad experiences he’d let keep him from getting baptized and he’d finally told her about his mother. He knew that somehow she understood how hurt he’d been over the years. He’d told her more about his father and Chante and she’d cried there in the semi-darkness holding his hand.

  His heart had been full when she haltingly admitted she wanted a home and family more than anything else, but was afraid she wouldn’t know how to have one successfully. He’d come to realize that she'd had more mothering in the couple of times she’d been around Naomi than she’d experienced in most of her life, and she worried she would fail as a mother herself because of that lack.

  She was sweet and smart and beautiful, and he’d fallen hopelessly in love with her.

  What to do about that was entirely another question. She was still living in fear of her father, and even though Slade was comfortably well off, his assets paled in comparison to her wealth. Moreover, he’d never thought about settling down anywhere but home in Wyoming, but her home was far away and very different from his. Although he’d uproot even from his beloved Wyoming if he had to for her—something he never dreamed he’d consider.

  On top of everything else, she was only twenty years old and he wondered if she was even ready to think about the same big decisions he needed to make in his life. He knew she loved him even though she hadn’t told him so. She’d proven it over and over, especially in the last few days. She never put limitations on him and accepted him exactly as he was. He just wondered how much of that was the fact that she’d needed help so desperately when they came along. And would she marry him even when she knew she was in love with him, or would she refuse out of some warped sense of protecting him from Judd and his friends?

  He thought about all these as he rested on and off. The pain medicine was still making him have bizarre dreams, and that mixed with his deep thoughts made an awful combination. He awoke in the night drenched in sweat from dreaming of a hellish bull ride, all tangled with Isabel, the mafia, Judd, and the FBI. Even Dante and Rossen’s brothers were in there somewhere.

  She woke him with a gentle hand there in the dark, dried his brow, and helped him back to sleep by massaging the part of his shoulder that didn‘t hurt.

  ****

  Naomi came back and was as much comfort to Isabel as she was to Slade. Isabel was tired to the bone. It’d been days since she’d slept through the night in a bed. Even when she went to a nearby hotel to rest, she slept poorly and felt she should be with him.

  The nightmares from the first bull ride had come back with a vengeance and between visions of it, and Slade’s wreck, she hardly dared close her eyes. Naomi came in and her tranquil, sweet calm filled the room. She must have known what was going on, because she had the hospital bring in a chair that made into a bed for Isabel. She literally sat between Isabel and Slade, helping them both to rest in peace. The next morning Isabel felt like a new woman.

  That afternoon Rossen stayed with Slade while Naomi and Isabel went to run some errands. They ended up at a place called Temple Square. Naomi took her into the Visitor’s Center. They needed to get back, but Naomi took her on a short tour and to a huge statue of Christ which was incredibly touching.

  Isabel had never felt like this in her life. She and Naomi didn’t say anything. There was no need. The tears filled Isabel’s eyes, and flowed down her cheeks as she stood and looked at His face and hands with th
e infinitude of the universe spread out behind Him.

  She’d come to know He was the Savior as a child from her mother and Eli, but her experiences of late had taught her with a surety that He and the Father knew her personally and of her troubles, hopes and needs. This beautiful statue was such a tangible image of His love and sacrifice that it filled her whole soul. Its beauty and magnificence were almost overwhelming. She stood and looked up and could feel her spirit being strengthened and renewed. At length they quietly left, neither speaking for fear of losing the Spirit they’d just experienced.

  Isabel walked back into Slade’s room feeling strong enough to face the days and weeks she knew were to come. She was still too emotional to even speak when Rossen asked where they had been. She started to try to tell them but Naomi had to explain. Rossen put his arm around her shoulders and gave her a big squeeze as she tried to smile through her tears. As she sat down beside Slade, he reached for her hand and gripped it hard.

  That night, late in the dim and quiet of the hospital, she and Naomi talked into the wee hours as Naomi answered Isabel’s questions about the Church. One of the things that had puzzled Isabel most was what had happened when Slade had asked for a blessing before his surgery.

  At her questions, Naomi taught her the concept of worthy men being ordained to the priesthood by one having authority. They then could use the priesthood’s power to do Christ’s work much the same as the Savior Himself had done when He walked the earth. These same priesthood holders could also perform other priesthood ordinances like baptism and more.

  Trying to understand, Isabel asked, “So Rob and Rossen and the other guys have this priesthood, and can use it to serve others?” Naomi nodded and Isabel asked further, “After Slade gets baptized, can he be a priesthood holder and baptize me?”

  Naomi took Isabel’s hand in hers and tears filled her eyes. She was too weepy to answer right away. Finally, she said, “Yes, I’m sure he’ll be able to baptize you. Have I missed something? Rossen hasn’t even told me Slade is getting baptized. When did he decide this?”

  “Rossen doesn’t know yet. Slade’s waiting for him to ask him again. He wants to surprise him, so don’t tell him.”

  Naomi answered dryly, “Oh, I’m sure he’ll be surprised all right.”

  She continued to answer Isabel’s questions until they were both too tired to think. Naomi finally asked, “Would you like to pray together?” Isabel nodded and Naomi prayed, and they each drifted off in their respective chairs. Naomi smiled, even in her sleep.

  Chapter 9

  As the car finally pulled into the driveway of the Rockland’s main house, Isabel had a sweet sense of coming home. This place brought a sense of safety and peace and she felt such love here.

  Opening Slade’s door, they carefully helped him sit up, then get out and stand up. It was an amazingly long process. Sweat beaded on his forehead and he gratefully sat down in one of the chairs on the porch when he made it to the top of the steps. They left him sitting there as they unloaded the car and tried to get things settled in the house.

  Earlier Rossen had rented a hospital bed, and set it up in the great room in front of the picture window. Slade would be able to watch what went on outside around the ranch and still be near a bathroom and the kitchen, where Isabel and Naomi could work and be close by. It was bright and cheerful, and they hoped it would make staying down a little easier for Slade.

  Bo brought Isabel’s duffle bag in and put it in the guest room where she’d stayed before.

  Once they were unloaded, Isabel went back outside and sat in a chair beside Slade. He was tired after the long drive and was content to sit quietly in the early August sunshine. Despite trying to build up his blood in the hospital, he was still pale and chilled easily, and she brought him a small blanket.

  It was the same one she’d used here when they watched the thunderstorm and it brought back memories. He must have been thinking along the same lines because he said, “It seems longer than just six weeks ago that we first brought you here.”

  “It’s only been seven weeks since I first met you.”

  Their eyes met and he reached over with his right arm and took her hand. “Looking back, I think I was actually in worse shape then than I am now. A lot has changed in seven weeks.” He rubbed his thumb across the back of her hand.

  Feeling tingly from his touch, she asked, “What things have changed for you?” She waited for his answer, wondering if it would be good or bad.

  “My life is more organized and well thought out now than it was then, and more importantly, I’ve found my enthusiasm. It’s hard to tell in this condition, but the spirit really is happy even though the flesh is a little trashed.

  “And I’m not nearly so cynical. I’m actually looking forward to the future and settling down.” He looked from their entwined fingers to her face. “For the first time in my life, I’m thinking about forever.”

  Her eyes searched his. At length, she asked, “What, did you meet a girl?”

  “I did. She’s beautiful and smart and kind, and I fell for her like a ton of bricks. She’s kind of rich though, and I’m not sure what her thoughts are about all this.”

  “Have you asked her what her thoughts are?”

  “No. I’m actually a little afraid to.”

  “I don’t really believe you’re afraid of anything, Slade Marsh.”

  He was quiet for a few minutes, then finally, he asked, “What things have changed for you in the last seven weeks?”

  She considered this and softly said, “God sent me peace like a river. It’s hard to explain. This rodeo lifestyle is exciting and busy, and a couple of times I’ve had years scared off my life, but my constant fear is gone. It’s a happy excitement, not anxious.

  “And I’ve seen a lot of new things and places.

  “I’ve discovered I like kissing.” She smiled self-consciously. “A lot.

  “I’ve answered some deep questions about the meaning of life.

  “I’ve met wonderful people I’ve come to love. Especially one in particular.” She looked up at him.

  “And I’ve decided I don’t want to live in California anymore.”

  He turned to look at her so fast it made him wince. “Why not?”

  “I’m much happier away than I was there. I’ve found places I’d rather be, both physically and emotionally.”

  “Where?”

  She gazed out at the mountains in the distance. “I’m a little hesitant to tell you.”

  “Why?”

  “I don’t know. Makes me vulnerable to rejection I guess.” She looked down at their entwined fingers.

  He seemed to consider this as his thumb continued to stroke her hand. “What exactly is it that makes you prefer these other places?”

  Shrugging, she said, “Beauty, peace, security, sage, biceps. Lots of things.” She gave him a grin.

  He laughed right out loud, and then groaned from the pain.

  She said, “You asked.”

  “But what about your horse farm? You love it.”

  “I do. It’s pretty, and racehorses can be addictive. I have some dear friends there and some very good memories. But there are many more bad than good. I don’t know that I ever want to go back. I’m not sure I will, even if things here don’t work out.” She gently pushed the rocker with her foot.

  “What would it take to make you choose to stay in Wyoming?”

  “To be invited.”

  She looked up at him hesitantly. He looked back at her intensely and asked, “Could you wait to be invited until I think I can get down on one knee and be able to get back up?” His smile was a little self-conscious.

  She couldn’t help the smile or the moisture in her eyes as she looked into his and said, “I love you, Slade. I can wait forever if you need me to, but I’d never want you down on your knee. You’re the strongest man I know. I love that strength. I would never want you to do something to deny it or humble it.” The teasing grin came back. “But we
could wait until you have a little more stamina.”

  It was probably a good thing Naomi came out just then to call them to lunch. Afterward Slade went back to bed and slept until dinner.

  Isabel worked in the kitchen all afternoon so she could be near in case he needed help. As she worked she thought about the conversation on the porch. She was sure he was talking about becoming engaged, which she wanted more than anything in the world. But when she really thought about it, she needed to deal with the Judd issue before she could become that definite a part of his life.

  Slade’s first night at home was a rough one. He’d gotten a little behind the pain and then struggled to rest. Isabel didn’t even try to go to bed until after two, and then was back out there to help him settle down and rest again at four-thirty. When he finally went soundly to sleep an hour later, she put on her riding breeches and went out to ride.

  The dawn was glorious as always, but honestly, she was too tired to even enjoy it, and returned to the house sooner than she normally would have.

  ****

  It was pure chance that Judd got a break in the whereabouts of Carrie. When Slade got hurt so badly Isabel had told Dante when he had called Slade's cell from a pay phone across town. That afternoon Dante was talking to Eli in the race barn, unaware that they weren’t alone.

  There was actually a stable hand two stalls over. One of the few who weren’t fiercely loyal to Carrie and the Johnsons. He was supposed to have been mucking out the stall, but spent most of his time leaning on his pitchfork sending text messages to his girl. Because he wasn’t working when they came in, they didn’t know he was there and he heard Dante report, “Carrie’s friend was hurt bad in a bull riding wreck. About died, I guess. If the hospital had been a little longer drive, they’d a lost him.”

  Eli and Dante had gone on to talk about other things and the stable hand had gone on to Judd with the information. He figured it would be worth something to her old man and he was right.