Who is Killing the Great Capes of Heropa?

by Andrez Bergen

  “Such as?”

  “Hats.”

  “Well, well. A smart guy.”

  At that point Jack closed his eyes, almost let go. Then he remembered Louise, and snapped back to rag-doll attention.

  “Which left five of you,” he spoke up. The Equalizer was struggling to focus on the man hovering above. “After I gutted your offices at the Patriot, the police — well, what was it the police said? That they found five bodies…?”

  “Ahh, I see your confusion.”

  It was Wright’s turn to guffaw, his self-abuse a thing of the recent past.

  “Funny thing. We were in the midst of a ceremony — usually careful to stay far enough apart in order that one or two of us would survive any attempt at assassination. This was the first time in years we’d congregated together, and the reason? That same, self-sacri-ficial doppelgänger we were just talking about. You attacked us during a private wake for the man — which accounts for five identical cats being found, even after I escaped the terrible maelstrom. If you look closely, you’ll find that one of them has a spent .45 in his head.”

  “You sure like to waffle on.”

  “A winner’s prerogative.”

  Police sirens were getting closer, and maybe the mayor would lift a lazy, tobacco-stained finger to employ his Equalizers laser-signal doohickey, and alert Jack’s comrades — this, after all, was a Reset world in which people still mostly respected the team, there was a miscreant in a costume who’d blown through the wall of one of main bank branches, and a bunch of people were now held hostage. Only a matter of time — something Jack suspected he didn’t have.

  “God,” he grumbled.

  “Yes?”

  The Equalizer very slowly glanced up. “Fair enough. Okay. I guess you really are, since you designed all this, right?”

  “Of course.”

  “Or did you…?”

  “What is the meaning of that crack?”

  “Well,” Jack managed to go on, “how do we know it was you?”

  “Bet your bottom dollar it was I.”

  “But how d’you know you’re the original…? Like, where exactly were you when I attacked the Port Phillip Patriot the other night, when your — your ‘brothers’ carked it? I blew the place to smithereens.”

  “Why, I’d stepped out to get refreshments.”

  “As the original would stoop to doing.”

  Doubts flooded the man’s half-masked mush. “I see your point. How embarrassing.”

  “And…What’s to say that the Big O wasn’t the archetype all along—?”

  “Pah!”

  “—fed up with his corrupted clones’ poor behaviour?”

  Wright frowned and then grinned in maniacal fashion, at the very same moment Jack lost the capacity to smile at all.

  “Perish the thought. I think — at least I presume I’m the original. Sometimes, it got confusing as to who was who, but none of that now matters. Does it?”

  “You tell me.”

  “I believe I am.” Wright peeled away the tattered red remains of his mask and tossed them into a nearby trashcan. “By the way, was it you that pulled this Reset stunt?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Then perhaps you could fill me in — why is it I haven’t been restored, along with everything else?”

  “You mean…you and your better halves getting back together, thereby making you young and pretty?”

  “Exactly.”

  “We’re following your rules, moron…Dead electrical impulses don’t Reset.”

  Clicking his tongue, Wright then glared at Jack while he very carefully placed the gun level with the injured man’s left eye.

  The sirens had stopped wailing.

  Beyond the barrel, Jack could see flashing lights through the hole in the wall. Some fool was on a loudhailer, but none of the words made any sense.

  “I’ll keep the extra bullets for your friends, baby,” Major Patriot said at his silkiest, far more coherent. “Time to die.”

  “I don’t think so, arsehole.”

  That was when the sculpture Twilight Over Hoboken reared overhead, from behind Donald Wright, and crowned the man. He dropped the gun, staggered a few steps, shrieking, hands clutching his head, and then turned to ogle at his assailant.

  The screams ceased. “Impossible,” he instead mumbled aloud. “You’re dead.”

  Taking advantage of those precious seconds, Jack used his left hand to prop-up and level the right one, pointing it in the direction of the other Cape’s set of stars.

  “Don’t you know yet that anything is possible in Heropa?” he said, just before letting off a blast that lifted Donald Wright, taking him and his offensive, unshapely costume clear through the wall.

  Straight after, Jack collapsed.

  Other fingers were raising him, gently this time, onto aching buttocks. The Equalizer found himself gazing into Louise’s deep, emerald-coloured eyes.

  “God, Jack. Are you all right?” she asked, distress etched into a beautiful face no longer bespectacled.

  “Hey. What happened…to your glasses?”

  “I ditched them.” The girl checked over his injured, blood-spattered form; started tearing strips off the slip beneath her skirt, to use as tourniquets for stemming the flow — all seasoned professionalism.

  As he was manoeuvred about in this manner, Jack had no idea where he rediscovered the strength to toss back both a grin and a quip.

  “Aren’t you people…s’posed to give better customer service?”

  “I don’t play by the stupid rules,” Louise said, a smile sharing space with concern while she tied another knot, “and, you know what? Now I remember everything.”

  “You do?”

  “I do.” Louise pecked Jack’s cheek. “Can we start afresh?”

  R0GUES GALLERY +

  ENCY CL0PAED1A

  C0MM1X

  Glossary

  Everything you wanted to know about comics, the movies, Aussie slang, obscure nomenclature and some of the oddball colloquialisms you’ll find in Heropa.

  Adamantium: indestructible metal alloy in the Marvel universe — Wolverine’s bones are made from the stuff

  Amazing (Adult) Fantasy: anthology comic series published by Marvel in 1961/62, culminating in final issue 15 — which intro- duced Spider-Man

  Arse: British/Aussie English for ‘ass’

  Balançoire: A movement usually with grands battements or attitudes, in which a dancer swings the leg front and back through first position

  Beano, The: British children’s comic published from 1938 to the present time

  Belle Époque: French golden age, 1871-1914, famous for musical theatre art

  Black Panther, the: African superhero created by Stan Lee and Jack Kirby in the 1960s

  Blue Max, the: 1966 British WWI flick about a German fighter pilot, directed by John Guillermin & starring George Peppard

  Bonnet: British English used for a car’s hood

  Bronze Age of Comics: from 1970 to 1985

  Bushidō: ‘the way of the warrior’ is a code of honour that the samurai followed

  Buster Crabbe: American athlete and actor. Starred in Flash Gordon and Buck Rogers cliffhanger serials and one Tarzan movie, Tarzan the Fearless (1933)

  Captain America: iconic superhero created by Joe Simon and Jack Kirby for Timely Comics in 1941, made into a theatre serial in 1944, and resurrected by Kirby with Stan Lee for Marvel Comics in 1964. Gets about in a costume with an American flag motif, with powers endued by the Super-Soldier Serum & Vita-Rays

  Cark it: Australian slang, meaning “to die”

  Chicago typewriter: .45 caliber Thompson submachine gun (a.k.a. a Tommy gun)

  Chrysophylax: the name of a wily dragon that invades the Middle Kingdom in J.R.R. Tolkien’s Farmer Giles of Ham (1949)

  Clodualdo: Illegal depressant

  Coir: natural fibre extracted from the husk of coconuts

  Comics Code Authority, the: de facto censor of U.S.
comics from 1948, banning violence, gore and sexual innuendo, amongst other things

  Cool McCool: U.S. TV cartoon series (1966- 69) created by Bob Kane — of Batman notoriety — and used as a throwaway variant of just plain ‘cool’

  Coot: a foolish old man

  Cor!!: British humourous comic launched in 1970

  Cure Blossom (aka Tsubomi Hanasaki): Lead magical supergirl in Toei’s 2010-11 Pretty Cure anime series, HeartCatch PreCure!

  Dada: iconoclastic art movement from the early 20th century

  Dashiell Hammett: created iconic noir character Sam Spade and alcoholic detective duo Nick & Nora Charles

  Dell Comics: published comics in the U.S. from 1929-73, including The Funnies and Kona, Monarch of Monster Isle

  DC Comics: est. in 1934 and therefore one of the largest, longest- lived American comic companies—the publishers of Superman and Batman

  Démagogue: a political leader who seeks support by appealing to popular desires and prejudices rather than by using rational argument; a rabble-rouser Der: Australian slang — mocking exclamation indicating faked and exaggerated stupidity or bewilderment

  Derro: Australian slang, derived from the word ‘derelict’: hobo, bum, no-hoper

  Dick Tracy: police detective comic strip created by Chester Gould in 1931

  Docs: famous British Doc Martens lace-up leather boots

  Domino mask: small mask covering only the eyes and the space between them, as worn by the Lone Ranger, the Spirit, Hit-Girl and Robin

  Dosh: currency, money, cash, moola

  ‘Drowning Girl’: Roy Lichtenstein used an image from a romance story in DC Comics’ Secret Hearts #83 (November 1962) by artist Tony Abruzzo as the basis for this iconic Pop Art image

  Erskine, Dr. Abraham: German biochemist & physicist who developed the Vita-Rays and Super-Soldier Serum that created Captain America in 1941

  Exegesis: the act of analyzing passages from a document — often the Bible — to understand what it meant to its author and others in the author’s culture

  F.A.B.: a call-sign used in the British action marionette show Thunderbirds; there’s some debate as to whether this means ‘Full Acknowledgment of Broadcast’, ‘Fabulous’, ‘Final Audio Broadcast’, or ‘Fully Advised, Briefed’

  Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: first published in 1971, a novel by Hunter S. Thompson with illustrations by Ralph Steadman

  Fedora: felt hat associated with Prohibition era gangsters, Sam Spade and Indiana Jones

  Flash Gordon: 13-installment 1936 sci-fi/action theatre serial starring Buster Crabbe, based on the comic strip created in 1934 by Alex Raymond

  Frida Kahlo: famous Mexican surrealist painter

  George Peppard: Hollywood actor, best known for for Breakfast at Tiffany’s & The A-Team GHB: grievous bodily harm, a.k.a. “wounding with intent”, according to English crimal law; also a name used for gamma- Hydroxybutyric acid, an anaesthetic used for recreational drug purposes — and in date-rape

  Ginger Meggs: Australian newspaper comic strip created in the early 1920s by Jimmy Bancks.

  Golden Age of Comics: from the late 1930s until the late 1940s or early ’50s

  Gomene: an apology in the Japanese language; “sorry”

  Great Gazoo, the: a pompous green, floating alien who was exiled to earth in the 1960s TV cartoon The Flintstones

  Grit: “America’s Greatest Family Newspaper” — at least according to the ads they stuck in 1960s comicbooks

  Harvey Comics: American comic publisher, 1941-1994, with titles like Casper the Friendly Ghost, Richie Rich, and Captain Freedom

  Hoon: Australian expression used to refer to anyone engaging in loutish behaviour; in particular used to refer to people who drive in a manner considered anti-social or reckless

  Hylax: a large corporation specializing in plastics

  IdInteract: virtual reality-based portable gaming console

  In good nick: British English expression meaning ‘in good condition’ Jack Kirby: legendary comic book artist and innovator active since the 1940s, most proactive in the ’60s at Marvel Comics. Co- created superheroes Captain America, the Fantastic Four, the Avengers, Thor, X-Men, Silver Surfer, and the Black Panther — along with stunning villains like Doctor Doom, Galactus, and the Red Skull

  Joe: coffee

  Joe Simon: created or co-created a slew of important characters in the 1930s–1940s, including Captain America and Manhunter. Frequently worked with Jack Kirby, and was the first editor of Timely Comics

  Joseph (Joe) Kubert: founder of the Kubert School in the U.S.; created Tor in 1953, and worked (as artist) with writer Robert Kanigher to create DC title Sgt. Rock

  Kármán line, the: lies at an altitude of 100 kilometres (62 miles) above sea level, used to define the boundary between the earth’s atmosphere and outer space

  Kerberos Panzer Cops: 1988-2000 manga series about special armoured police, written by Mamoru Oshii, illustrated by Kamui Fujiwara, and with mechanical designs by Yutaka Izubuchi. Oshii also used them in his movies StrayDog and Jin-Roh

  Khan: Khan Noonien Singh, shortened to Khan, is the villain in the 1982 movie Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

  Labonza: the belly, stomach

  Lex Luthor: long-time arch-fiend in the Superman universe

  Lois Lane: intrepid reporter for The Daily Planet and Superman’s long-time love interest

  Loo: toilet

  Maltese Falcon, The: Dashiell Hammett’s famous 1930 detective novel featuring Sam Spade

  Mandrake the Magician: syndicated American newspaper comic strip created by Lee Falk (The Phantom) in 1934

  Marat, Jean-Paul: physician, political theorist, scientist, radical journalist and politician during the French Revolution; more famous for being stabbed dead in his bath in the painting by Jacques-Louis David

  Marat/Sade: 1967 movie directed by Peter Brook, adapted from the play by Peter Weiss

  Marvel Comics: American comicbook company originally named Timely in 1939, Atlas Comics in the 1950s, and its better-known incarnation from 1961

  Matthew 24:27: the Gospel According to Matthew is the first book of the New Testament

  Mauser C-96: German pistol introduced in 1896 and first used in the Boer War, later adopted by the German Army

  Milk Bar: Australian term for suburban local shop

  Mitt-Mate 1187: Hand-held computer and communications device Mr. Sparkle: in Season 8 of The Simpsons (the episode ‘In Marge We Trust’), Homer stumbles across a Japanese dishwasher detergent called Mr. Sparkle with his face on the box

  Nancy Drew: perennially popular fictional girl detective created in 1930 whose books have sold 80 million copies

  Noggin: head

  Norinco Type 86S: AKM-type assault rifle produced in China in the 1980s

  Ornithology: the study of birds

  Peplum effect: a short overskirt usually attached to a fitted jacket. Popular as a design in women’s suiting in the 1940s

  Phantom, the: long-running American adventure comic created by Lee Falk (Mandrake the Magician) in 1936

  PreCure: also known as Pretty Cure

  Pretty Cure (aka PreCure): Japanese animated magical superhero girls’ series, screening from 2004

  Qípáo: body-hugging one-piece Chinese dress for women

  Rain: 1932 film starring Joan Crawford, adapted from a story by W. Somerset Maugham

  Ralph Steadman: iconic British cartoonist who worked extensively with author Hunter S. Thompson

  Red Skull, the: Nazi supervillain and Captain America’s arch-enemy since 1941

  Ridgy didge: Australian slang, meaning the real article, not false or pretentious

  Rock Hudson: Hollywood leading man in the 1960s-70s

  Roy Lichtenstein: prominent American artist in the 1960s; with Andy Warhol, helped to define the Pop Art movement

  Sailor Moon: 1990s Japanese manga series and anime that set the standard in the magical-girl genre, in which mild-mannered teenage girls transform in
to heroines to fight evil

  Sheila: colloquial term for a girl or woman in Australia

  Silver Age of Comics: from 1956 to about 1970

  Spider-Man: Marvel superhero created by Stan Lee and artist Steve Ditko in 1962

  Stan Lee: American comicbook writer, editor, actor, producer, publisher, television personality, and the former president and chairman of Marvel Comics; in the 1960s he co-created the Fantastic Four, Spider-Man, Thor, the Uncanny X-Men, and the Avengers

  Steve McQueen: Hollywood actor and racing driver. Starred in The Magnificent Seven and Bullitt.

  Steve Rogers: Captain America’s civilian, out-of-costume real identity — at one time a frail young man transformed via the Super-Soldier Serum & Vita-Rays in World War II

  Stetson: iconic hat worn by Humphrey Bogart in The Big Sleep

  Super-Soldier Serum: The drug from which Captain America, Isaiah Bradley, Patriot, Protocide & Josiah X get their enhanced abilities, developed by Dr. Abraham Erskine

  Swandooly: Australian slang for money

  Thomas Nast: nineteenth-century German-born American carica- turist, sometimes called the father of American cartoons

  Timely Comics: predecessor to Marvel Comics; in the 1940s they published Captain America, the Human Torch, and the Sub- Mariner

  Tiny Tots: British comic published 1927-59

  Tolkien, J.R.R.: English writer, poet and professor responsible for the fantasy outings The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings

  Tony Nancy: famed American drag-racer and custom vehicle uphol- sterer

  Toodle-oo: British/Australian English expression meaning ‘farewell’ Tyre: British English ‘tire’

  Ukiyo-e: Japanese woodblock prints produced between the seven- teenth and twentieth centuries

  Un bel di vedremo (‘One beautiful day, we will see’): an aria from Puccini’s opera Madama Butterfly

  Uvidimsya: from Russian language, meaning “we’ll see each other again”

  Vegemite: dark brown salty paste made from yeast extract, used as a spread

  Vibranium: fictional rare metal from the Marvel universe, used to construct Captain America’s shield. Wakandan Vibranium has the ability to absorb all vibrations

  Vickers machine gun: water-cooled .303 British machine gun produced by Vickers Limited, from the First World War to the 1960s